Raphael

How can you only be a man if you came from a woman? How can you only be a woman if you came from a man?

Some Thoughts on Men And Orange/Green Transition I think that many men are afraid to lose their power and at the same time many men are afraid of their power, especially in the Western world as the culture is transitioning from stage Orange to stage Green. When it comes to being afraid of being powerful, too much comfort and technology makes so many people (men and women) irresponsible. However, this issue of being irresponsible hit more strongly men* because even though the Western world is transitioning from stage Orange to Green with more equality between the genders, there is still an overall masculine/feminine balance (with of course exceptions) where men are expected to provide containment and women are expected to be more vulnerable. Now, I'm getting into controversial territories here so don't get me wrong: all the progress concerning gender equality and improving the condition of women are important. I want that and I want that to move forward as fast as possible because I saw women that I was very close to being abused while growing up. Progress is very important in this area. However, men will always be overall physically stronger than women (except if we evolve into a different specie), which mean that there will always be more abuse from men against women, so we will never get to a point where women will be as safe as men in society. But, it's still important to work for increasing women's security and rights as much as possible because anyone want to be safe even though it will never be perfect. So... progress is happening and this is good, but backslashes are also happening mostly from the masculine side because many men aren't able to integrate Green. Many are getting confused and don't know what to do: after all men have being dominating women since the dawn of time, so now when change is happening many of them are trying to be kind men... but this doesn't work with women because most women are attracted to masculine men and men who are getting into unhealthy aspects of stage Green by being too kind and too feminine aren't attractive to feminine women. Having an healthy masculine / feminine integration is difficult for many men which causes the creation of four main groups: Toxic men who fall into toxic ideologies. The amount of people in this group will increase as society will move more and more into Green, then decrease when Green will become better integrated and more normalized. Silent depressed men. This group will increase, it represents men who cannot find a partner because they are too much into unhealthy aspect of Green (too much equality for example) and maybe have masculine shadows and thinks that masculinity is bad because of how many damages it caused to the feminine in the past. Normal average men. This group will decrease as society will move more and more into Green, then increase when Green will become better integrated and more normalized. During the decreasing period, a certain number of men will fall into the Toxic Men group or the Silent Depressed Men group, but also a small percentage will evolve, learn to properly being masculine with a feminine integration and will get into the Strong Healthy Men group. Strong Healthy Men. This group will increase a bit. I think that most men have a Green shadow (because they are at Red/Blue/Orange), but also for the first time in history many men have some Red/Blue/Orange shadows (because they are at Green and are reactive against the previous stages because masculinity at the previous stages caused a lot of damage to women, so they dismiss masculinity because they don't want to be seen as bad). It is very tricky for many men to properly integrate masculinity and femininity, yet this is very powerful. A strong man use its strong masculine power to penetrate the world with its love, he is ruthless, yet loving at the same time. He ruthlessly penetrate the world because he loves it. Teal Swan has an amazing video on power and its place in life. * this might be a masculine bias here, I'm not sure.

No problem. You're doing great.

Thank you very much. I love you.

Heal them, make them work together. Synergize the strong masculine power that flows through your veins with the kindness of your mother. Penetrate the world with your deep masculine power through your genuineness, your care, and your love for it. Heal, become whole, become God.

What do I do?

Because they were way too strongly opposed to work together, yet you came out of them. You came out of a strong, ruthless, visceral man and came out of one of the kindness women on the planet. You have an extremely strong power, you feel it when your blood flows through your veins and you also have the kindness of your mother inside you.

Why?

Because they've never been able to build a bridge to communicate together. Because they never merged together.

Why do I always have two conflicting sub personalities? (My father self and my mother self)

Exactly. You know that you are deeply strong and powerful, so powerful that this is difficult to handle. We've told you to be kind and submit, yet this doesn't resonate with the deep power that you have inside you. You've hidden your power so much because you were afraid of showing it. You know that this power is strong, so strong that it scares the shit out of people, so strong that it can shake the world.

My power.

What are you afraid of?

Because I'm afraid.

You know why. Why this defensiveness?

Why are you asking why?

@Raphael I have some questions for you, please take some time to contemplate them: Why do you always stop so quickly? Why do you change your focus so quickly? Why do you feel so easily discouraged in the face of challenges? Why does pessimism comes so quickly when you face challenges? What don't you push through things more? Why do you feel some tears coming up when you sometimes focus intensely to overcome the challenges? Take this seriously, it's important. Let me know your answers when you're ready. Thank you.

Well... I don't know you strategy, nor if your working on something aside. If it's the case, I hope that this is helping you towards your goal. Another perspective on that is also that a job can be used as a ladder: you get a job -> you gain some experience -> you use this experience to escape wage slavery.

Be so good that they can't ignore you.

Had so many thoughts one day that my brain exploded. Felt great.

Mainstream Porn is Like Eating at McDonald. It's just so fake, so inauthentic, it gives a very distorted view of sex. What the main pornographic companies are producing is garbage for the mind, it creates enormous self-esteem issues within men and women. I feel like I might vomit one day if I continue watching this. Enter "intimate sex" on PornHub and you'll find healthier videos. Normal people with normal bodies having healthy sexual intercourse. The channel "Kate Marley" healthily shows what intimacy should be in a couple.

23/06/2021 (Week 22) Sometimes my child-self feels rejected by me when I... criticizes me too much try to be too perfect don't express joy don't let myself be authentic don't listen to my basic needs don't speak don't allow a bit of craziness in my life Sometimes my teenage-self feels rejected by me when I... repress my emotions don't try to understand myself repress my anger isolate suppress my ambition am too perfectionist criticize my body One of the things my child-self needs from me and rarely gets is... attention containment love proper nurturing freedom of speech letting go of expectation One of the things my teenage-self needs from me and hasn't gotten is... love understanding encouragement support touch communication a deep emotional connection One of the ways my child-self gets back at me for rejecting him/her is... neediness sadness depression shyness fear insecurity One of the ways my teenage-self gets back at me for rejecting him/her is... anger laziness lack of motivation by hiding his needs poor thinking habits negative self-talk anxiety social anxiety

23 June 2021 Wake Up Time: 06:52 AM (objective 5:30 AM - 6:00 AM) In Bed Time: 10:05 PM (objective 9:00 PM - 9:30 PM) ✅ Stretching after waking up ✅ Cold shower after waking up ❌ No social media until 7 PM ❌ 45 minutes of Doing Nothing Before Going To Sleep Deep Work Sessions: 09:31 AM - 10:37 AM I did some progress on the date time picker. I also had a lot of unrelated thoughts. Focus: 3/5 Progress: 3/5 10:57 AM - 12:18 AM I continued the work on the date time picker and also continued to have a lot of unrelated thoughts. Focus: 3.5/5 Progress: 3.5/5 01:30 PM - 02:36 PM I continued the previous work. I had an insane amount of unrelated thoughts. Focus: 3/5 Progress: 3/5 04:17 PM - 05:20 PM I continued the work concerning the date time picker. Focus: 3.75/5 Progress: 3.5/5 07:30 PM - 08:38 PM I continued the work concerning the date time picker. Focus: 3.5/5 Progress: 3/5 Average Focus: 3.35 / 5 (objective at least 3.5 / 5) Average Progress / Session: 3.2 / 5 (objective at least 3/5)

Ideas of Practical Journals Forgiving Myself for the Pain that I Caused: will maybe create this one, not sure Financial Freedom: will create this one, this year Becoming A Social Being: not sure if I'll create this one Superhuman Food: not sure if I'll create this one Divine Masculinity: not sure if I'll create this one Integrating Red: not sure if I'll create this one. I thought about learning a combat sport in order to integrate Red Finding My Purpose: will probably not create this one It doesn't mean that I don't work on myself if I don't create one of these journals, but just that I'm not sharing some stuff publicly. In all cases, whether I create these practical journals or not, I have an entire life of growth ahead of me.

22/06/2021 (Week 22) Sometimes my child-self feels rejected by me when I... don't express myself hide my emotions don't myself be crazy hide my curiosity close myself don't take care of my basic needs Sometimes my teenage-self feels rejected by me when I... keep my anger inside don't pursue my goals don't act on my desire don't give myself love don't listen to my intuition don't care about my needs One of the things my child-self needs from me and rarely gets is... attention visibility containment security love understanding acceptance freedom One of the things my teenage-self needs from me and hasn't gotten is... freedom support understanding security love touch nurturing One of the ways my child-self gets back at me for rejecting him/her is... sadness laziness feeling isolated fear neediness ego-centrism One of the ways my teenage-self gets back at me for rejecting him/her is... repressed anger difficulty to focus neediness non self-expression lack of motivation laziness fear lack of courage