JimAqua

I am 20, and I have been dating my girlfriend since 2 years. We're both in love ever since and we have our own independent lives. We're not living together, which is why I haven't known everything about her yet but all I know is, she really do loves me! The question of breaking up comes by because, we both are from different religions. She haven't met my parents yet, but I met hers. My parents has strong religious beliefs and I respect that, and due to which I am incapable of marrying someone of different religion. I am not religious tough, I prefer myself being agnostic. The problem is, she and her family demanded me of changing my religion if I had to marry her, probably because her parents want to see her marrying in church and suprisingly she herself wants that too. I offered them a solution about marrying in court, but they refused. Later I realised, if I had to change my religion, tough I care very less about religion stuffs, I am going to loose my parents and dignity of my parents. Well you might ask, how dignity comes in? The answer lies in society where we people lives in. Our society here is all about lower caste(s), higher caste(s), religion stuffs. My girlfriend is of lower caste and I am borned of a higher caste, and we have different religions. If a higher caste marries a lower caste in our society, the family is rewared with nothing but shame. I am very much against this idea. When I seek to talk about my prolems to her, she tells me the same answer as always "Don't worry Jim, lets stay together for 2 more years and that will be the time when you tell your parents. If your parents force you not to marry me, we will take a decision at that moment but now lets leave our problems to god, he will surely support us and give us a way. Just don't focus on these prolems, God is always with us" Let me put it out again, The condition of marrying my girlfriend is changing my religion. I might loose my parents and no matter how wrong they are, they are my parents. I will bring my family nothing but shame. Any opinions, advices are much welcomed. I want to solve this, since it is affecting my studies, and everything. I want some opinions and i am afraid if I will make a mistake and regret it later. Thank you so much for reading! P.S. I am hindu(Officially and based on my parents beliefs) and she is a christian.

Leo, but I do not believe in things like astrology

@MIA.RIVEL Yeah you are very right about it. Its my decision and not others. Well, I am ready to convert because I love her and now she tells me that she will not allow me to marry her if I had to loose my parents because of this marriage. So I guess, the ball is really in my court. Thank you so much for sharing your opinion, it helped me a lot! @Emerald Wilkins These same exact thoughts came to my mind long before, and I guess, its all about what I really want and how I really want to build my own life. Thanks for your opinion! Now I think I am opened to new solutions to it! Thank you so much!

Seems like you were somehow under same circumstances like me, and you did gave me some idea. Thank you so much for your opinion.

@Pallero Thanks for your opinion. Seems like I really got to be patient about this issue and yeah I exactly told her like I wrote and usual I recieve the same reply from her. @IndependantKouhai Thank you! Optimism is what I suppose to work of for this situation.

@yanyan In my opinion, you are almost distracted. You might know your priorities, but somehow it is not clear. If I was in your place, I would have visualised about what is important to me and feel the emotions of achieving my goals. I would sit down and write my goals and visualise and feel the emotions of the whole scenerio. Scenerio of how it would feel of achiveing those goals I have set. Its easier said than done and also you might have difficulties in language, learn the language well in your free time by reading books and other sources. It will help you to understand things better. Set a time for everything. Time for important thing (things that you know you should do) and non-important things(facebook, etc). Remember, you might get lazy while you're setting time for everything and following it but at that exact moment, think about your goals and feel the emotions as I have said. Thats called getting motivated according to me. Anyways, Good luck. Everything I said was according to my beliefs and experiences.

@Scarecrow What I believe about human beings is you cannot change them. Firstly, I suggest you to talk it out to your parents and sister as you mentioned. Tell them about how it bothers you and how it is affecting your life. I know it is very difficult to do so, but its worth a try. Be assertive and set boundaries. If talking to them doesn't work, I would tell you to ignore their behaviour everytime and do your work in a different place.