Pallero

I was doing a strong determination sit outiside and looking at a tree branch while I was sitting. About twenty minutes in something happened. I was focused on one particular leaf on the branch when the edges of my field of vision became blurry, more blurry than usual. A bit like that one Instagram feature that blurs everything but a round area in the center. It was also as though they became less saturated as well. Then the center area of my field of vision, which was full of leaves, started swimming very slowly. It looked like a really slow kaleodiscope where when you turn it, areas shift. It wasn's symmetrical like a kaleidoscope though. And it moved very slowly. Another way to describe it would be like looking on a surface of water where areas of leaves swim in different directions. My field of vision was made of a few areas that all moved in different directions, sometimes in a spiral. The movement stopped as soon as I tried to look at it straight. It only happened around the leaf that I was focused on. The centre where the leaf was stood still. I was looking at this for half an hour, before I got a headache. So. Has anybody had similar experiences? Does this have anything to do with meditation and awareness? Or maybe I should just get my eyes checked and get me some glasses?

Some drawings of mine... ❤

I love vocal trance. I like how it transports me to another reality where worries don't exist and I can accept everything as it is. ❤

Thank you for this post. I thought about this during the video too. ?

Good question. Been thinking of that myself. I think it's a combination of several things. Some people are trying really hard to offer help, but it's not always working, because it's not the right kind of help of it's not presented in a manner that people can easily understand. You cannot tell a depressed person to just drop their depression. That it's just a story. They have struggled with it for years and to them it's the most real thing there is. That kind of advice doesn't really do much. Yet that kind of insensitive advice is what many people offer. I guess it just goes to show that the helpers haven't experienced deep depression for themselves. And how can you help someone with depression if you yourself haven't been depressed? You have no idea what it's like! I myself went through deep suffering and it would be hard for me to imagine becoming enlightened without suffering. It just teaches you so much. But I guess people have done it in other ways.

Sometimes I look at myself in the mirror and tell the reflection "I'm not you" as an exercise.

Have you tried guided meditations? I use them every time I feel like I'm in a meditation rut. Or play with another technique.

What do you mean by that? ?

I tried Miracle Morning too, but I could never stop reading or journaling after 10 minutes. For me, it's the other way around. I need to release myself from strict routine. I'm way more productive when I follow my intuition. What does your intuition tell you?

Good question. I think meditation becomes sloppy when you don't really want to do it. And it's effective, when you are motivated. Of course, it's hard to be super motivated every day, so there will be many sloppy sessions, but those are important too. I wouldn't call them "sloppy". I think that's a way a perfectionist talks, and perfectionists don't get anywhere. You know when to change a technique when a certain technique appeals to you, or when you try it and think, "yes, I love this technique!" Then keep doing it for a while, like Leo said. You will know what to do by doing it and learning from experience. I wouldn't think about "maximizing" too much. You should respect yourself and go at your own pace, whatever it may be. Otherwise, you're not going to be able to do it for very long. (I've been meditating for five years, by the way.)

@Revolutionary Think I see. But why do you think that snot and pee are gross? I don't think that it's natural for people to find those things gross at all. It's just your body working as it should. I think it's beautiful. I think that these are all unresolved issues and they are all related to sex!

Hi! And thanks for taking the time to answer all of these questions. I was wondering, what's your biggest shadow? Or one of them? I'm just curious about your own wounds and limitations and the work you do to accept and embrace your "dark side".

I'm so tired of all the false promises that marketing strategies use to sell things! I constantly feel like there's something wrong with me when I can't accomplish something "quickly and easily", like I "should". I want to end this cycle. I want to raise awareness to how difficult and time and energy consuming some things really are. How did it really happen? I wanted to start this topic where we could share our clashes with reality. I thought we'd share stories about our expectations of how difficult something would be and how it actually turned out (if at all). Let's help each other set some proper expectations for success in self-development (or any other field). I'll start. As I am writing this, there's a book on the desk with the words "The Effortless Path to Discovering Your Life Purpose" on the cover. On the back cover there are words like "simple", "easy", "effective", "transform your life with this one simple test" et cetera. I have been searching for my life purpose since I was about 15 years old. I'm definitely closer (29 years old now), but I'm not there yet. Nothing simple about this. I've read plenty of books, done a huge amount of self-inspection, exercises on values and other things. I've tried several different fields of work, thinking I'd found "the one". All I found was more ego to dissolve, more work, more work and more work. What about you? I'd love to hear how hard and awful "quick and easy" things actually are!

@Revolutionary Think I don't believe that you don't care about sex and that you find it uninteresting. I think you have major unresolved issues with your sexuality (be it whatever it may). To me, it sounds like you have suffered some serious emotional trauma. When I read your text, I see desperation, anger and hurt. That's just what I feel. Maybe it's not true, but I just wanted to tell my opinion in a straightforward manner.

This is potentially stupid, because I haven't watched this video myself, 'cause it's new. But I still think it's relevant. And I stand behind my choice, because I trust Teal.

@Annetta You know, it looks pretty cool. You could color it and tattoo other stuff around it in the same style and it would totally look like some famous (Mexican? Peruvian?) artist did it. ??

I haven't done the LP course or had many enlightenment experiences, but my intuition tells me that if enlightenment is something that you want, your life purpose will turn out to be something that will bring you closer to enlightenment. Actually when I think about it, everybody's life purpose should bring them closer to enlightenment (or at least expand their consciousness).

@Danielle That sounds great! I'm gonna do it sometime this month.

Thank you for this insight! It's so true! Yesterday, I watched your Contemplating Your Death video and it really helped me make the distinction between success and happiness. When you are aware of your own death, the distinction becomes just obvious. So I think if I keep doing that, it will help me a lot! @Mr Being Thank you for that video! It's hard to remember sometimes that fame and money isn't everything.

@socal04 There are plenty of options, like communal living, eco villages, low budget travel, nomad living, moving to another (a non capitalist) country... I have only begun navigating these waters myself so I don't know for sure, how everything works. I just know I will never (never say never?) go back to 9 to 5! Unless it's my life purpose, of course, but then it won't be 9 to 5. It'll be 24/7 (?). I don't know.

Try Teal Swan's 365 Days of Self-Love practice. https://tealswan.com/resources/processes/365-days-of-self-love-r9/ It's basically designed that you embody self-acceptance and embrace everything about yourself that you have been resisting, everything. And with that comes freedom, peace and acceptance of the whole world exactly as it is.

@Raphael I've been saving for about a year and I have now about 2000€ to spend on tickets, visas, food et cetera. I mostly plan to couchsurf and camp. When I run out of money (I expect that to happen within first two months), I'm going to get a job.

I agree. I have also found this exercise to be extremely powerful. I hope Leo's gonna make (sometime, in the future) another, more in-depth video about the power of self-acceptance and how drastically it can change one's life. ❤

My favorite video is Lifestyle Minimalism. As a former perfectionist and a workaholic I loved the idea of drastically slowing down the pace of my life. I've been applying the advice to my life for a while now and I have only good things to say about lifestyle minimalism! ? But I think that you should just follow your own intuition. Read through videos' titles and pick those that you feel most drawn to.

Here's a picture of my lovely jackalopes. I'm so proud of them! The tattoo artist is Tuomas Valtanen, darksideofzen on Instagram. ❤