ChrisGroch

I am very interested in hearing from anyone in this group that might share a very specific experience of mine. As an adolescent pondering eternity one night, I experienced a tremendous mind-blowing realization of eternity, which for a moment was beautiful, but then was soon followed by an extreme and disabling fear of eternity/infinity. This fear was so intense that after many years of trying to revisit the fear and resolve it, I decided it was not serving me and I learned to forget about it. I'm curious if anyone in this forum who is seeking deeper truth such as enlightenment, shares a story of this fear of eternity? And if so, here is my question: Do you think this realization / fear was a product of the mind, in which case it's not all that significant? Or was this a glimpse into the void in which case I would benefit from facing the fear and learning more from it? I am looking for responses really only if you have had either this same direct experience, or have specific experience working with apeirophobia and enlightenment together. People who have experienced this all have a very similar story. It typically starts around age 12,13. And I have found it's very difficult for people who have not had this specific experience to relate to it, which is why I'm attempting to focus the replies I receive. (I am putting this in the enlightenment category instead of the phobia category because I want to limit insight to the context of my current journey towards enlightenment. This fear is not something I currently struggle with and am not looking for help. I am interested though if it was a clue from my childhood that I ought to pay attention to as I continue this amazing journey.)

Emerald thank you for your response! I would say that it wasn't a fear of insignificance, although I can see how that can occur. But it was more the fear of existing forever. If I exist forever without an end - this is what is feared. So is this fear of living forever a sign of experiencing the void? Or is it a fear that the mind creates because "it" is afraid of living forever?