Mal

Nothing "wrong" with it. It's just not working, is it? We need to be ready to do things, sometimes it will take twenty years to be ready for a wind down. Not saying the idea is pointless, I'm saying this is not a cookie cutter process.

@Hardik jain Maybe because you're following your 'master' Leo instead of wanting to do it for yourself? I moved out of a high paced job in the city and moved to a rural spot because I wanted to, I had enough of what that lifestyle was doing to me. It was my choice, it wasn't because I followed some YouTube guru.

Hehe..the "spiritual ego"

@AlexB Hey Alex, I think I know what you are referring to. Are you talking about the "advice" industry out there? YouTube, self help section in your local bookstore?

Also Elton, you can live a normal life. You can do what you want. Just don't do it unconsciously. Go through this process and come out the other end free. Then you can live with choice.

@Elton Start doing excersises to heal your mind. You know what dysfunction is, now it's time to ignore that and turn attention inward to get rid of this programming.

@Elton I'm just mentioning the distinction between curative awareness and ideation. If you contemplate this you won't get entangled in the dream and will begin to break your habits. It's ok however to have an intellectual insight into this stuff. That's a good start. But there is more to it, awareness is not merely being "Informed"

I hate to be the one to say this, but you're not actually aware of any of it. All you have done is take Leo's words and made them into another belief. Awareness will happen when these patterns start to dissolve. Until then all you're doing is shifting ideas around in the dream

@7thLetter What is more fruitful is to drop this idea of becoming extroverted We live in a society that rewards extroverts and marginalizes introverts purely because extroverts help to maintain the system. They make better celebrities, neurotic managers, pickup artists, ladies men, entertainers to stimulate the neurotic needs of the deficient individual. It's a complete facade. Being extroverted isn't any more special than being introverted, it's just that society conditions introverts to hate themselves because they don't fit in with this ridiculous schema we have constructed for ourselves. So be who you are, don't buy into more programming and lies. What we need is more authentic people and less conditioned people desperate to "make it" in a system that is bound to fail, a system that never meets the needs of humanity, but only feeds the ideology of rationalism. As Maslow once said: "And what shall we make of the well adjusted slave"?

@yanyan Hi, Your problem might be that you really want to spend time on Facebook and playing computer games, but you have a part of you inside where you believe that you should be doing something "more important" like self help. If you didn't want to improve, but you took it as gospel from Leo or some other self help guru that you MUST change or do something with your life (because you're young, impressionable, and are at the age where you are still idolising heroes like Leo) then you might have created a false self that is nagging at you to do something that you really couldn't care less about. If this has happened, then you might want to examine your motives and figure out what YOU want to do with your life. If you take some time thinking seriously about what you want, then whatever your real passion is will naturally come to the surface and you will just do it. No need to push yourself. Just do what you are doing until you have had enough.

@Rashad Nobody needs 140 self help books. You only need your own intuition to be switched on and all the information is already there. If you see for yourself that your ego is a construct, you can access a part of you that is bigger than the intellect. Then what happens is you start to discard all the garbage you learned because you know it was bogus information that didn't really mean anything, it's all just individual insights that people are selling. Is just confused me, because I was like half the people here: "oh, this concept directly contradicts that concept, which one is real? I'm depressed because my gurus don't agree with one another" When you see it all for what it is, life becomes simple, easy, you don't have this nagging internalization that you need to become something, or do something. I even worked with a professional therapist and that just confused the fuck out of me, because it just installed a healthy "persona" and a moral system. Nonsense!

Read Shakespear. Self help concepts will kill you quicker than a microwave dinner! If you look closely, most of the people on internet forums are regurgitating the theory they internalized on the mental level, while they are still depressed and are getting no results. 20 year olds with no life experience reciting concepts that only really construct aware people actually know first hand - bogus information that doesn't work, copied almost word for word from their favorite youtube wannabe guru who is doing the same. This problem is as old as the hills, self-help is a trap!

@Rashad Go straight for an awakening experience. Then you will never need another book again. It's all "up here" anyway

@Katiee If you can, start winding down for 2-3 days prior to your 7 day course. Half the time spent on retreat unfortunately is the body "detoxifying" from conventional life, and there is a lot of tiredness mixed with restlessness while the body adjusts. It's about day 4 where a stillness kicks in, which is a beautiful feeling as the meditation is then fully underway. Is this a formal meditation retreat you are planning or a d.i.y. break?

I'd like to hear your thoughts on what a 'spiritual ego' is. I suspect myself to have a huge spiritual ego, and I'm only just becoming aware of what it is, how it's keeping me trapped. However, I would like to say that I would have never realized this if I had not given myself the opportunity to see my ego in action, on this forum. So I see there benefits in being able to speak one's mind in the company of some very understanding people. It's a bit like group therapy. What are your thoughts?

The ego is an illusion, you're right. But when boundless energy identifies as an individual self, that self creates ideas, and those ideas are obviously real. Damn real. So we could say the ego is true, it's just not absolutely true. Now, the one who 'choses' to be 'aware', that's not boundless energy, that's just the identity looking at it's own activity, awareness is choiceless, it's not run or controlled or brought on by anything, certainly not an idea of suggestion to "look"

You have been paying attention

Perhaps this is something to look at? I mean, the quitting thing, is quitting something you do when you don't see a result? Meditation like "do nothing" actually helps bring about awareness in times when we're bang in the middle of acting out a repeated pattern of failure or self sabotage and is the saving grace that breaks that cycle. So maybe continue with the practice, and wait for the REAL test of the practices effectiveness. You will be surprised how much a pain pattern can make you more conscious instead of unconscious when you have this meditation habit behind you. For example: You mentioned in your other post that you fear you might not be able to get a boyfriend. Well, this is a pain pattern. If you stick with the meditation, one day when this thought comes up again you simply won't believe it anymore. You will see it as silly, even laughable. It is THEN in those moments when you understand first hand the power of these methods. Those are the times you grow.

Thanks for sharing! My biggest realization in the last 40 years is the more I've tried to change, the further away I've got from real change. looks like you're onto something!

@Mary If it is important to you, then make an effort to meet somebody. The right person for you will come along when you are ready. Will a relationship make you happy? No, they are a challenge! The growth you will get from the relationship is the thing that will lead to happiness. Worldly objects don't quite provide the 'promise' we project onto them. This is how we've been taught to look at life, but it isn't quite true. As far as I can tell, happiness is a process of letting go if these expectations and becoming independent of external conditions. Don't expect to embody the goal in two months, I'm sure that as long as we're on this planet there is always 'work' to do. Otherwise, why would we even be here?

@Mary Just quit. Go back and forth until the pain gets so intense that it forces you to take this seriously.

You have to eat, don't you? I still work, enjoy it, enjoy the people, the projects, I get a rush from my work, but I don't have this expectation that it's going to add anything, or give me what I'm expecting from it. From this vantage point I'm actually better at what I do, less chance of burnout too It's a subtle shift from being dependent on external gratification, to being the creator of my life.

You have been lied to. We all have. We're conditioned since birth to work and contribute to society and we are sold the idea that the 'reward' for our efforts is we will 'become happy'. This is a scam, reality does not work this way. Now you know, intellectually, that worldly success will not lead to happiness, you can begin on your journey to find true happiness. It's better to be on the first rung of the right ladder than be halfway up the wrong ladder. The wrong ladder is what we have been taught about conventional life. Assuming that this is something you want. Not everybody wants happiness, they want success, sex, comforts, ease, avoidance of pain. Hardly anybody wants to really break out of their conditioned beliefs, because that is ultimately hard to do if one is still clinging to this conventional existence.

Can you imagine this self defeating programme running, and then on top the "pickup player" nonsense added to that. Talk about a double bind. That is enough to drive anyone to a nut house! Thanks for your comment, this guy needs it.