Harry

@Shiva Brilliant advice.

@carlo Why are you jealous? From what I have seen jealousy stems from two main issues: 1) Feelings of inadequacy. If you feel like your girlfriend is too good for you you will expect her to cheat. Because why would she want to be with you when there are so many better men out there? This is a problem with you, not her. Fix your self-esteem or watch her leave you. 2) Lack of trust and lack of faith in your partners integrity. If cannot trust your partner, your relationship is already doomed. If your partner cannot be trusted, and you know they will cheat if they have the chance, then no amount of you forcing them to stop talking to guys is going to make them suddenly faithful. Leave them and find someone who has some integrity.

@stephan What you guys are saying is great, but simally telling someone to accept and believe in themselves without any plan of how to do isn't enough. Here are a few things you can do: 1) Sort out your Self-Esteem. Buy the book 'Six Pillars of Self-Esteem' and complete the sentence completion program. I guarantee that after this you will feel a inner strength so strong that you will look back and find it ridiculous that you ever questioned that you were good enough. I used to be so socially awkward that I wouldn't even go to the shop to buy grocerys because I was scared of talking to the casheer. Now, thanks to this book, I have grown to be absolutely fearless when it comes to social interations—so much so that I struggle to understand how I could have ever found it difficult. But more importantly I feel full inside. Whereas before I felt like there was a bottomless pit where my soul should be, now I know that I'm valuable, worthy of everything I work for—yet I don't feel like I need anything or anyone to be happy. 2) Meditate daily. Get out of your head and into your body. 3) Whenever you get a feeling that you are 'not good enough' grab a pen and paper and follow your thought processes. Once you get to the root of this feeling of inadequacy you will see it's illusary nature. Good luck Stephan.

Wow, how did you manage to meet him?

1) Wake up at 8-10 depending on when I went to sleep 2) Have tea, cereal and supplements 3) Do sentence completion exercises (Nathanial Brandon style) 4) 'Meditate' for 10 minutes. It's way too fucking short I need to sort this out 5) Go to uni. Listen to audio book or podcast when walking and read when on the bus. 6) Revise for 3X two hour blocks and half hour break, but a lot of the time run way over on my breaks and ruin my schedule (happening right now ;)) 7) Gym/Run 8) Go home and grab some dinner. 9) Take notes on PD videos and books I'm reading in my journal. 10) Chat with housemates/Netflix and chill/ go clubbing or to a bar/smoke a dooby. @Mr Intergrity and @MIA.RIVEL your schedules might be amazing but @Psychonaut, yours is pure perfection .

What is the point of the full lotus as apposed to sitting in a chair or with your legs crossed?

@Mat PavCompletely agree. 99% of people (guys and girls) are not gonna be psychologicaly fit for a relationship. You gotta learn to live with it. Focus on making yourself an absolute badass so that when a girl who isn't riddled with psychological problems wanders into your life you don't absolutely flake it.

I would advise you to have a look for gambling support networks in your area and online. Many people have been through the same thing as you and found their way out. I'm sure they will be more than willing to help you out.

I get false wake up's all the time. It usually only takes me a few seconds to realise that I'm still dreaming, but sometimes I don't realise and go and talk to my family and friends! Don't be too afraid by it, just think of them as projections of your subconscious. If you are seeing spooky things in a lucid dream remember you have the power. I like to have a weapon you can use to destroy evil projections (I use a lightsaber). Thinking of it as a game takes away the fear factor. You will probably fall back into dreamland after sleep paralysis, but think that you are awake. Don't get freaked out by this and whatever you do DO NOT TRY AND LEAVE THE DREAM. I am not going to tell you what happened to me when I tried to wake up in my dream in fear of scaring you away from the lucid dreaming entirely... But just remember, it will not go on forever, you will wake up, you will be fine. I've never had an OBE, any advice on how to achieve one?

@Socrates I mean this with the best intentions. Please see a psychiatrist.

1) Labels.labels.labels.labels. 2) Are you projecting? Because everything you say seems perfectly applicable to you 3) I can tell you think you have it all figured out. What makes you so sure you are right?

@Socrates I dont find your argumentation style very productive. I've seen this in a number of posts. You never seem to grasp what points people are actually making. For example, in 'are ISIS members acting morally': You ignore what @SkyPanther is actually saying and keep banging on about this idea that he is trying to push 'green' on everything. Seems to me like you've built up this strawman argument and just keep using it wherever you see fit, even if it is completely irrelevant. Moreover, you I have seen you attack anyone who disagrees with you but I am yet to see you change your mind on anything. Eg. @Isle of View You are either right about everything, or too stuck in your beliefs to even contemplate the chance that you might be wrong. Or you just like being confrontational.

You couldn't possibly know that for sure. ;P I don't particularly like affirmations but other techniques certainly can obliterate a core belief.

@Socrates 'Reprogram your subconscious mind' is just a way of describing changing out thought patterns, habits and attitudes. It is the basis of learning and self-improvement. I personally have drastically changed my thought patterns, habits and attitudes in the past two years of being involved with PD. I'm sure most others on this forum have too. Moreover, the entire psychotherapy profession is focused on delving into clients subconscious and altering the influence it has on their life. It seems irrational to just assume, despite all evidence, that the behaviour of the subconscious can not be altered.

@Zane I think you misunderstand what it means to be an alpha male. Being an alpha male IS being your authentic self, once you cut out all the 'awkward' bullshit. Seems to me like you are one. Don't treat a girl as some speical flower or you will get dumped within seconds. @All-In Sorry mate but your mindset is fucked. 1) Stop chasing this girl NOW. She communicated she wasn't interested so she doesn't deserve another chance with you. If you keep chasing you are more likely to get a restraining order than a date. 2) 'The fact that I told her"Tell me if you change your mind" really keeps my hopes up that if I improve she might come around and change her mind about me.' This is a trap. You probably chased her away far too much to ever get her back. Holding onto these futile hopes will hold you back from going out and finding another girl. 3) Work on your social skills. (If you need some advice on this let me know) 4) Learn how women think. (Believe me this will explain a lot for you) I find Coach Corey Wayne gives the clearest advice on this topic. Check this guy out. Read his book (it's free) and in a few weeks you'll have dozens of girls dieing to date you ;).

@Kallan Good on you man. If (when) you get any success make sure to post it on here!

(From link) Agreed, if @electroBeamreads more and expands his knowledge he will have more in his bank to talk about. BUT, I don't think this is the core issue. He needs to build up a strong self-esteem to convey these ideas and opinions with conviction. As apposed to second-guessing every word that slides out of his mouth. ;P Moreover, I imagine he has a lot of quality shit to say already that is subconsciously being held back by his belief "I am not interesting". Your mind will act on a belief identically to if it were a fact. Therefore, this belief would cause one to conclude: "If I am not interesting why would anyone want me to talk to me? They don't! Therefore, there is no point me talking openly if I am just going to get cut down, as I inevitably will, due to my boringness." @electroBeam Obliterate all signs of this belief. Only then you will allow yourself to become interesting.

@Socrates Well said, I comletely agree! He should not be looking for external validation of 'being interesting' as a basis for his self-esteem, but be looking inside to see what he values, believes in and is interested by. It is insanity to allow your opinion about yourself depend on a thought in another person's mind. The paradox is the less you care about trying to be interesting to others and instead, start caring (and talking) about whatever interests you, the more engaging you will naturally become. Get out of your bubble of anxiety. Becoming genuinely interested in both yourself and the person you are talking to are the best approaches to becoming a great conversationalist.

Techniques to be interesting? Come on now, have you not been reading anything we have been saying? Stop looking for some technique or gimmic to 'make you interesting'. YOU ARE INTERESTING! You just need to build a healthy enough self-esteem to start to see that!

Without sleep?

Firstly I may be wrong but your idea of 'the ego' seems incomplete. At least to me (if 'me' is even a thing), the illusion of the ego encompasses more than just the part of you that has small wants, needs and desires. There is no 'higher' or 'lower' self on a fundamental level, as there is no self in the first place! There is only consousness. Bare in mind I am not disputing the ideas of higher and lower/egoic self from a psychological, Siegmund Freudian perspective but only in a fundamental sense. I am not enlightened and have not experienced 'the truth of no-self'. So I may be guilty of lacking the 'post-rational' perspective if such a thing exists ( I am not aware enough to see it if it does ) Secondly I feel like a lot of people in the spiritual community use the word 'God' as a synonym for 'Pure Reality'. Although there is nothing intrinsicly wrong with this, as it is only a label, I feel like there are a few things that could be avoided by assigning another label (as frivolous an activity as it sounds): 1) It can lead people who are just starting to delve into the nature of their consousness down the wrong path. Many have preconceived notions of 'God' as a sort of egoic entity that created and runs the universe. This could cause people to, during prayer or meditation, try to 'connect' with this entity. As such, instead of shining the torch in on their perception of themselves, they search for 'God' as a sort of imaginary being out there somewhere in their awareness. 2) It pushes a lot of Athiests who could very much benefit for spirituality away from the relm entirely, confusing it with just another kind of religious dogma. I have to admit that I fell into this trap up until about a year or two ago. Please do no hesitate to call me out if I am bullshiting myself or being dogmatic in any way.

@Nic I guess if it's practiced as a way of increasing compassion for other people it could be used constructively. I'm currently delving into the 'Loving-Kindness Meditation' http://www.buddhanet.net/metta_in.htm. This appeals to me more than praying as, I have found that, I find Christian practices somewhat repellent. (Probably due to my Catholic schooling) I think it's appropriate to distinguish whether you are praying with the intention of: 1) Some kind of supernatural deity or 'force' to grant your wishes. (this sings egocentricity for me) 2) Altering your conscious experience toward other people. I.e. Increase your levels of love, kindness and compassion. 3) As @7oo13ad says, creating a believe that you can do what you may have previously classified as impossible. I see practical use for both 2) and 3). 1) is really the only kind I think is problematic.

1) I agree completely with what is underlined above. You should focus on the day to day activity and DO NOT focus on the goal, or you will easily get frustrated that you are not progressing fast enough and will be ignoring the actual practice needed to get better. 2) However, with all respect, I completely disagree with the advice in bold. If you are ever to find lasting fulfillment in your work/hobbies you are going to have to push through stages where you completely lose motivation/interest in the subject. To give up every time the excitement wavers is to doom yourself to a life of dabbling, with no real passion, skills or fulfillment in your work. 3) I recommend 'Mastery' by George Leonard if you want to learn the common traps when starting a practice (meditation, video editing, coding) and how to overcome them.

Only two times? Coach would not be happy with you. Spot on. Communicate you have no intention of being friends and there is no way you will ever be friend-zoned.

THIS I personally don't see any point in prayer. You thinking a few thoughts in your head has no effect on, for example, helping feed staving children after their homes have been struck by an earthquake or comforting a mother who has lost a daughter in a suicide bombing. If you want to help then give money to the children, give the mother a shoulder to cry on. Don't just sit in your room feeling like you are really making a difference just by thinking about them. Of course thinking may prompt you to take some action. However, this doesn't change the fact that mere thought alone, without any interaction with a source outside your own mind, is completely useless. Moreover prayer, encouraging yourself to become lost in thoughts, is a distraction from true spirituality.