Barna

Isn't it popping into existence right now? The past originates from here. The future originates from here. And here originates from nowhere.

@Dogsbestfriend for me meditation means widening the attention into a global awareness. This is the opposite of focusing attention on something. So I still don't really see how can meditation help me to focus on my job. @bigzbigi @vela3 I tried armodafinil yesterday (half of a 150mg pill). It wasn't noticeably stronger than the modafinil, but after like 6 hours I got a headache that lasted for the rest of the day. The cause of this might be that I was on modafinil before for 7 days straight. Leo was right, the body needs some days off to recover. So I didn't take modafinil or armodafinil today. I'm totally fine, I don't need them anymore to have energy in the morning, I don't feel any kind of craving for the substance. (So today I'm gonna take mushrooms instead )

I think being HSP is almost irrelevant when it comes to psychedelics. The most important factor is: how much identified are you with yourself. Psychedelics show you who you are, but there's gonna be a lot of resistance in you if you already think you know who you are. There are lots of types of people. It's okay to be anybody before the trip, if you can be nobody on the trip.

Wow, this was an awesome read, thanks for sharing! There's something in me that wants the same kind of crazy experiences

That's not very specific How? What kind of meditation gives you energy to wake up in the morning and be productive the whole day? Is it one long meditation or few seconds of mini-meditations throughout the day? Is it sds or lying or walking meditation? Do you close your eyes or let it open? Do you listen to anything while meditating? Do you let your mind wander and observe it or do you focus your mind on something?

We're acting even to ourselves. We're continuously thinking to make ourself believe that we're persons. When I have the monkey mind going, sometimes I just ask myself: "Who are you talking to?" and the act of thinking becomes funny and unnecessary. I feel like thinking is superfluous. The space from where the thoughts arise is the same space that listens to the thoughts. I am the space. So it would be more efficient to just skip the thoughts and let the thinker and the listener be one, as it already is. Does it make any sense?

I think modafinil is mainly used for treating narcolepsy, as Leo said. I don't know if you can get a modafinil prescription for ADD. Yesterday I took it around 3 PM, I went to bed around midnight and I could sleep easily. I woke up around 7 AM. How do you measure the quality of your sleep? I don't remember waking up at night if that's what you mean.

No, they don't. But it's a cool song

I think this is also how the lever effect can come into play. If I will get used to living without resistance, then when I won't be on modafinil the resistance is gonna be obvious, it's gonna feel bad. And then I can consciously let it go.

I think the reason why you didn't like amphetamine is the same as why I don't like coffee. Because it's a stimulant. Coffee pushes me to burn fuel and let out the energy. It pushes my muscles to move or flex, my mouth to talk and my mind to think. But modafinil has a completely different effect, it doesn't stimulate me in this way, it makes me calm instead. I feel like it calms down all my resistance towards everything. And when I don't have the resistance in me, objects and phenomenons can start to pull my attention towards them. Do you see the difference in the dynamics?

@Sven I like how you thought this over. I cannot answer any of these questions. I might share a proper review after a few months of using the substance. The truth is, I haven't thought about the possible outcomes because I'm not so concerned about them. I'm not really afraid of what might happen because I don't believe in negative outcomes in general. I just do what feels good to do right now, I don't feel the fear of consequences. So I'm not recommending modafinil, nobody should do anything that I'm doing.

And you don't like that it affects dopamine because....? I mean, it has to do something with the brain, why is it a problem that it happens to raise the dopamine level?

You must be talking about family in a really broad sense. Link your sources

@Dogsbestfriend how did you replace it?

When I was done dying, my conscience regained So I began my struggle, a nothingness strained Out a flash made of time, my new form blasted out And it startled me so and I burst out a shout At which my legs ran frantic like birds from a nest And I ran until drained, leaving no choice but rest So I fell asleep softly at the edge of a cave But I should have gone in deeper but I'm not so brave And like that I was torn out and thrown in the sky And I said all my prayers because surely I'll die As I crashed down and smashed into earth, into dirt How my skin did explode, leaving only my shirt But from shirt grew a tree and then tree grew a fruit And I became the seed and that seed was a brute And I clawed through the ground with my roots and my leaves And I tore up the shirt and I ate up the sleeves And they laughed out at me and said "what is your plan?" But their question was foreign, I could not understand When then suddenly I'm ripped up and placed into a mouth And it swallowed me down at which time I head south I said hey ya ya hey ya ya hey ya ya hey ya ya hey ya ya Well I woke up to see them, these two mighty steeds With their mouths grinning wildly expressing my needs As they stood there above me, being flanked on each side I felt no need to fear them, no reason to hide So I reached up to touch but they faded too soon Yet their mouths still remained and stacked up towards the moon How that ladder of mouth waved so soft in the night And I looked up in awe at that beautiful sight And I dreamt about climbing into the night sky But I knew had I touched them they'd mouth back "Bye-bye" So I got up and walked down the path in the dark And there deep in the distance my eye caught a spark Of a crab twice my size with incredible strength Oh, it greeted me kindly and then we all drank And we drooled out together right onto the ground And the ocean grew up quickly right up all around And the earth looked at me and said "Wasn't that fun?" And I replied "I'm sorry if I hurt anyone" And without even thinking cast me into space But before she did that she wiped off my own face She said better luck next time don't worry so much Without ears I couldn't hear I could just feel the touch As I feel asleep softly at the edge of a cave But I should have gone deeper but I'm not so brave I said hey ya ya hey ya ya hey ya ya hey ya ya hey ya ya

HOLY FUCK! THIS. IS. AMAZING.

I tried Sulbutiamine stacked with Alpha-GPC and Uridine. I liked it, but I had to take 800mg of Sulbutiamine to be able to replace my morning coffee with this stack.

Yeah, I love powerful substances. I will buy some armodafinil, thanks!

I've had several trips on LSD and I've also tried other substances. Heck, I tried the whole alphabet. I started my psychedelic adventures with 5-meo after you released your video about it. I'm also grateful to you for sharing your experiences with that. Looking back, I think my 5-meo breakthroughs totally changed my life. Do you think armodafinil is safer than modafinil in the long run? Or does it worth buying it just to feel the difference between the two?

I'm also hoping that it will rewire my brain to pay more attention to the present moment.

Thanks! I don't know yet, next week probably from Monday 'till Friday to see how my body reacts to it on frequent usage. So far I really like it.

Keep it, share it!

Shin, the tricky thing about this thread is that you kinda want us to help you to manipulate yourself into stopping to manipulate others...

I'm manipulative when I don't trust life, when I have an imaginary reason to think that life won't unfold perfectly. I think this trust issue comes from not trusting the Life in me. I don't trust my Spontaneous Self that it will behave acceptably if I stop manipulating it. So my approach is that I just let myself free, I let go of trying to control my mind and I let go of my intentions. This attitude cultivates self trust and this gradually extends to trusting others and trusting life. I mean, what would happen if you just stopped manipulating the roller-coaster?

Has any of you listened to the audiobook called The One of Us? I'm looking for similar books/audiobooks. Any recommendation is welcome.