Armand

@Elton I take in some of what people say and try to apply them to what I can change about myself. Mostly idgaf about what people say, but I do feel for the women I've been with sometimes. They take things too far afterwards and go crazy when I'm trying my hardest to make it as painless as I possibly can. I don't like being a dick to anyone, but with certain people I'm forced to be in order for them to stop coming around. If an overweight girl was attractive to me mind and body it could work. Society has nothing to do with my feelings about anyone. If I met a curvy girl with the same interests and she was genuine about me then yea I wouldn't mind going in public at all. Everything would be great. It's just I usually find myself targeting skinnier women to date online. I think admitting my flaws and views about this will help me open my mind to the potential that looks aren't the first thing that should matter to me when searching for compatibility. Yea working on the self centered-ness issues. Doesn't help I'm a bit narcissistic when it comes to my own physical appearance, and so I project that into who I'm looking for in a mate.

@Huz88 That sucks man. I'd feel weird af keeping it all trapped inside. It's not like watching porn takes up an extensive amount of time. For me it serves it's purpose. If people watched it all day then yea that's addiction. I do it about 4-6 times a week which heavily depends on if I have a girl around or not. No one critiques couples on this subject. They don't necessarily need it.. Unless the sex isn't good enough. So how does it make us single guys "disgusting", or people who "waste their time watching filth"? When really we aren't any different at all? Leo's an expert at sex, and I promise that if had enough energy or time on my hands to keep women around all day and night.. I'd just bang them and never need to fap again tbh.

Sending some good vibes your way man. I'm trying to overcome my over sexed attitude so that my mind can focus on more important things. Like success.

@Corte I've only met a handful of couples that are always positive together without negativity. Those couples are able to grow together in many ways. Perfectly matched couples can reach self actualization easier cuz they are most likely staying on the exact same path in life anyway. They can teach each other how to solve problems, and work through issues faster. Also life expenses are easier to deal with when two people are bringing in money. This reduces a significant amount of stress in anyone's life. My buddy and his woman are starting a company selling teas. I think both parties must be in sync with their ideas for life. There are times that we need or seek out an outer voice to tell us what's missing in our lives. (Therapy, Friends, Family, This forum) I completely understand what you are saying man. I'm a single man who was in a very long and drawn out relationship that hindered me from growing in many ways. Some people are better off alone to contemplate what it is they want from life. I'm this way.. For now.

@ButlerMr Gleeson Man I need a girl who can look at me the way you're looking at that spinach.

@Donnie I wouldn't want to live for just one day with money being the sole reason behind my happiness. I would chose to live 100 years and still be able to be happy without all the added on luxury's of life. Success makes things easier, but it's not necessary. (Although we all strive for success, and it's the main reason many of us joined this forum)

@IVONNE Ask the supervisor to assign you to a new team leader? Is that an option for you? It's sad to hear that you feel bullied at your place of work Ivonne, but I understand if she's buddies with the supervisor. No amount of money is worth having to deal with abuse on a day to day basis.

25 wassup?

Going 3 days isn't that hard, but it's really hard (pun intended) to go an entire fuckin' week without doing it. Especially since I'm not in a committed relationship. When I was in one it wasn't a problem because I was laid almost every day. There are plenty of day's I'm not sleeping with a girl I meet online. Tell me how it feels after a week bro. I might try if it will help clear my mind about sex. Seeing as that sex is the reason I'm even on this self help forum.

@Huz88 If you are in a relationship it makes sex feel better, but if not then masturbation a few times a week is something that I would consider normal. Sex is instinct. It's got to come out at some point. Pun intended.

@Rob Seems like your diverting your attention away from your studies. Success is essential to meet our needs for income. Romance is something you think about after your studies/homework/required tasks your teachers ask of you. Those things can alter your overall success in life. Try training your mind to strictly think about working hard to make yourself a huge success, and then reward yourself after with thoughts of being with her, seeing her, dating her, etc.

@Huz88 You're welcome man. My psych book in college helped me greatly with learning about self-actualization/self fulfillment. Well the class itself helped me greatly. Books: The Art of Happiness, The Road Less Traveled because of my Psych interests, Flower has helped me find Osho (The Indian Guru) who has many good books available, Nathaniel Brandon's Six Pillars Of Self Esteem (I need to finish it), The power of positive thinking was my stepping stone into self help books.

@Huz88 No. I wish my mind could recall the site she was on, because she stopped harming herself not long after. My drug of choice is self help books. Cuz I can figure out my own problems and solutions from within. I was suggesting online forums dealing with bulimia, because it can be a lot more comforting to know how many others out there feel the same. It's a very common disorder these days. I just didn't want you to feel alone in your struggles, but it's cool you're starting to improve already by getting therapy sessions.

@Huz88 My ex gf was bulimic for years before we met so trying to stop her wasn't easy. I took down my bathroom door so she couldn't do it anymore without me quickly finding out. There are forums that can help you online. She received a good bit of help by talking to one girl who was about her age on an online forum devoted to helping those with eating disorders. Maybe you can look into one of those. (this forum is also a good option) Destroy all of those self hating thoughts. Only you can do that. You know it's something you need to change soon, or else you wouldn't be telling us. Everyone critiques their self image, and wishes they could alter something at some point. My advice is to not fall victim to your own negative thoughts. Let your better judgement make the calls. I wish you the best on your journey.

Alone is the only method for me. If you go with your friends it's just more competition. Me and my friends always end up hitting on the same damn girl. We typically go for the same type. It ends up making my friends jealous if they do decide to pick me. Once it was so bad the girl pulled a gun because she was tired of being harassed by my group. (I dated her after that somehow) During the day I've picked up more girls online, and at night I still prefer online sites like meetme, twoo, timber, match, cupid, forums. (I'm on here to help improve my relationship with women) Raves and clubs are where it's at though.

Meat does clog arteries, but I need to eat it to maintain muscle. I've heard good things from people who just eat veggies. Longevity is a big plus.

No it's not a need. A desire, and way to spread my seed.. Yes. It's considered "needs", because lots of feel we NEED it in order to be a man. We claim it's a need in our lives so that girls will sleep with us, because it also makes them think that if they don't that we will leave. (which we do)

My desires are impending on my own personal growth. There are desires that take up too much of our time, and it's hard to build up a life you desire if you are held down by many useless desires/distractions.

@appleaurorae Sex is not the most fundamental part of a real relationship. But it is for relations with women. I quoted what I felt like speaking about earlier. I think Leo is trying to inspire or appeal to the majority of guys (sort of like myself but with the exception that they are scared to approach women), but to those who are searching to find someone. I disagree with his thinking that bars are a very good option. It's dark in clubs and bars. Girls there usually have diseases, or are sluts willing to f*** anyone. Girls needing a baby daddy or sugar daddy for the most part. They are always pretty at first, but naked are not what you'd expect. Online dating sites or apps like Meetme Pof, and Okcupid have worked for me and my friends over going to a bar. I can actually have a conversation and get great sex from girls who's bodies aren't unattractive opposed to the bar girls I've met. (They aren't fitting my ideal of perfect yet, but it's getting better). So the idea of bar/club/rave girls staying, or you wanting to be with them is an insane consept to me. He was probably trying to say that it's hard for a guy to stay in a relationship longer with a woman if he hasn't seen her naked first. Again trying to relate to most men on the internet watching these videos for help. I think girls are confused by that question. A relationship with a friend, and a relationship with desires are completely different. You are way more complex about this, and there are polyamours/homosexual/asexual (if that's a thing I'm still unsure about this category), as well as many other individuals that would also find this particular video unrelatable. It's very interesting to me that you don't allow yourself to "follow the crowd". There is a lot of pressure on us to copulate early or you're not considered a man, but a p***y. It is ABSOLUTELY an addiction. A sweet sweet addiction that I myself have joined this forum to help minimize.

@appleaurorae I'm positive he did that for people who deeply struggle with being introverted. I've had girls mistake being in a relationship bc of having sex. It's a terrible feeling to harshly tell them "No we are and never will be a couple". It's better for them to be harsh though. I can't understand how any other man can repress his natural desire to be with a girl.

@Leo Gura Do you video your gameplay? I assume you play if you like game design. Musing while you play a game would be quite interesting to see. My ideal job would be to get to work for Ubisoft. I have a friend who was lucky enough to actually land a job with them. Plus your open honesty is very admirable. You aspire so many of us to change ourselves for the better with your videos. I might be able to live a fulfilled life thanks to your advice. Giving my thanks for all that you do man.

@Flower My longest relationship was 4 yrs, and it was all fake. I'm certain cuz my best friend Nate has the ideal relationship. They are one unit without all the emotional ups and downs, which is all I've ever had the pleasure of knowing. My ex always took it too far by accusing me of cheating and testing me every day. I was manipulated by her. I think she got off on saying untrue things to try pushing me to kill myself. Denouncing my love for her on a daily basis. She would push all these false accusations onto me. Leo's videos are helping me rethink things. I need to push out the remaining Victim mindset as far as possible. (Ironic I'm the victim in my past, and aggressor now in relation to that I'm guessing). It's dragging me down Flower. I'm not a shallow guy, and I can tell when girls are only trying to feign interest in the same things I like just to try to convince me that we are good together. I believe I can reconcile these feelings with the right one. Humiliation isn't something I need to leave anyone feeling anymore (my main reason for joining this self help forum), but Amber has made me feel guilty. Most girls just had sex with me then were perfectly okay parting ways because of my geeky obsessions. She actually tried to like the things I do more than anyone ever has, but that doesn't change my feelings for her.

@Flower I want to be more transparent. I've met (slept with) more than a few women who thought they needed a new partner every day. This makes me feel disgusting to admit, but I'm completely numb to the feelings of girls. I never had guilt about it until a girl told me she loved me and that I broke her heart. She attempted suicide by drinking bleach, but I was unaware that sex to her was a big deal. (or that our hookups were somehow mistaken for commitment). Amber is a good girl, but we have nothing in common. I myself have had suicidal tendencies, so I told her that I couldn't love her back. Intellect is something I desire above all else, but I exert a lot of energy in repressing my sexual desires these days. If I acted on them every time it would most likely end up costing my life.

I'm simply trying to be a better myself spiritually as well as physically. Hello I'm Armand which is why I have this long running joke of a name "Mandy". My friends really have stuck to it over the years. Wanting to reach a point where I can be happy with the person I decide to be, and then maybe try and build up from there. I honestly am a pessimist trying to convert my thoughts to a more positive place. I've attempted suicide before because I thought that my very soul was meant for this one person I was with. Only to find out she wasn't really what I think I needed at the time. I regret that sometimes I would pretend she were gone for good because she hindered me from making a lot of new friends. She always made my life harder on me by causing unnecessary drama as well as always thinking that I would want to cheat on her. She is a beautiful woman, but not worth chasing after. My parents are very strict Christians who preached some pretty warped opinions on sin. My father physically abused me until I was old enough to defend myself. It's not really something my pride wanted to admit on here, but anyway. A lot of my behaviors have become bad ones. Such as smoking and drinking then hooking up with people just because I'm bored with needs. I was with a girl not that long ago that was really sweet, and she might of been really good for me. Then I managed to mess it up by not being exclusive (which I had no idea she even wanted). I guess I'm a simple guy working a job that pays well, but it's not my dream to crunch numbers all day for the rest of my life. Needing this forum to help me stay on the right path instead of making things harder on myself which can lead to falling farther behind in life.

@Flower It's interesting to see someone with such a strong sense of spirituality. It's nice seeing people that are compassionate towards improving themselves, but also are here to help encourage others to follow by their example. You my friend are a very inspiring individual with so much to offer this world.