JKG

Tics I that I work on mastering computer science, I inevitably spend more time on my computer. Spending more time on my computer or other electronic devices had no good effects on my mental health(?). Everytime that I played too much Nintendo in my childhood my tics became worse. Everytime that I programmed more the tics became worse. Thats also a reason why I was not so consistent with programming in the last years. The tics feel like a tension inside my head. And now they become more again. I need to find a method to deal with that. It will probably be mindfulness throughout the day - not just in meditation. I need to relax while being on the computer, while walking around in the house, while studying, while doing anything. Today I spend less time in nature and didn't work out, so that is a factor too. Maybe a walk outside or a 5 minute meditation once in a while will help. I will also try out other relaxation techniques. But maybe this tension (or stress?) might come from an uninvestigated belief that I haven't discovered yet. Or it has nothing to do with programming, but with the upcoming oral exam, and the fact that I haven't studied enough yet.

17/05/19 Having a new experience or doing a comfort zone challenge - Streak 9 Concentration (10min) - Streak 9 (not yet but in a minute) Fasting until 12 - Streak 9 Getting up directly - Streak 0 Eating no unreasonable snacks - Streak 0 Eating less than 20g nuts and seeds - Streak 9 Waking up my body outside - Streak 14 Dorsiflexion exercises - Streak 20 (not yet but in a minute) Eating no oat meal - Streak 10 Eating no raisins - Streak 10 Eating a raw lunch - Streak 32 Self-Love - Streak 6 Apple cider vinegar in the morning - Streak 20 Gratitude - Streak 65 The new experience: I went with my mother into the city. There were sales and I bought a new running shit. (Afterwards I remembered that I could have bought ethical clothing instead). Then I went with my mother into the supermarket. I walked the way back home. Everytime now that I will fail with a habit I will give my sister 5€. This will be a motivation. After I got dressed etc in the morning I laid down in bed again with my phone because it was so comfortable. And now after dinner I made myself more fruit because I wanted to eat more while watching an interesting interview. And then I tried something out with Agave syrup and popped amaranth. This was definitively an unreasonable snack. I need to be brutally honest with myself.

Mission Statements Zone of Genius: finding and implementing solution processes Impact Statement: creating technology that advances the consciousness of humanity Life Purpose Statement: I find and implement solution processes to create technology that advances the consciousness of humanity Domain of Mastery: Computer Science Ideal Medium: Programming High-Consciousness Virtue: Consciousness Top 10 Values: Tranquility Intuition Growth Nature Honesty Connection Understanding Health Clarity/Vision Freedom Top 5 Strengths: Curiosity and Interest in the world / Love of Learning Hope, Optimism, and future-mindedness Appreciation of Beauty & Excellence Perspective Wisdom Spirituality, Sense of Purpose, Faith Top 5 Feelings: tranquil energetic light understanding passionate

It is not really arrogance. My ego just wanted appreciation from teachers in subjects in which I was good at. I still can work hard for subjects, even/especially when I am good at them. I am 18. I have almost finished high school now. I took an advanced course in maths and got As effortlessly. But I am from Germany, so the system is a bit different. I guess school maths is not pure maths. Sometimes I have watched some university lectures, or tried to understand the beginning of some maths textbooks. But not more.

It seems like maths is more important than I thought. But how important is maths now in comparison to computer science? I will have to chose what I want to study in university in about 1.5 months. Until now I thought of computer science as a major with a minor in electrical engineering. But I also could take maths as a minor. Or even maths as a major and computer science as a minor. What would be better? Is there even a right choice?

There has been a time when I wanted to get a lot of appreciation for my abilities. But I never was arrogant - I guess. I know that I want to become a master of my field, so hard work is required. Being humble sounds good

I would rather be a "mediocre software developer" than teacher or jurist There are also other fields within computer science where I could do something successfully if AI doesn't work. Maybe I am not 1 in 1000-10000, but at least 1 in 100 or 200. I would say that I am (one of) the best in school in my whole year in maths, computer science, chemistry and physics. @Huz @Alex K How important is maths now in this field?

17/05/18 Having a new experience or doing a comfort zone challenge - Streak 8 Concentration (10min) - Streak 8 (not yet but in a minute) Fasting until 12 - Streak 8 Getting up directly - Streak 9 Eating no unreasonable snacks - Streak 8 Eating less than 20g nuts and seeds - Streak 8 Waking up my body outside - Streak 13 Dorsiflexion exercises - Streak 19 Eating no oat meal - Streak 9 Eating no raisins - Streak 9 Eating a raw lunch - Streak 31 Self-Love - Streak 5 Apple cider vinegar in the morning - Streak 19 Gratitude - Streak 64 The new experience: In the night I slept on the new futon for the first time. It was weird to not sleep on the floor. I simulated an oral exam with my friend. We also went for a walk and were honest to each other. I listened to some new music.

the more that I think about this, the more awesome it sounds

@Liam Johnson Can I find some of your music online?

Programming For a few days now I have been starting to learn how to develop Android apps. After the first steps it became fun. I now understand the software Android Studio and the basic structure of an app. I have learned about Activities, Fragments, ConstraintLayout, LinearLayout, RelativeLayout, TextViews, EditTexts, Buttons and so on. I roughly know how they work together and how they can communicate with each other. I firstly tried to build a "MathsTool." Just as a test I made an activity (a screen) where the user could enter values to calculate sinus, cosine, and tangent. Today I started with a new bigger project. I want an app where you can learn vocabulary with - the "VocabTrainer". It could be useful for my sister. I learned XML a bit, and now I have realized that I will need a database for the vocabulary. Therefore I need to learn SQL too. It is fun. I would like to program all day, but there is also other stuff to do. School Next Wednesday is my oral exam in English. Today I started studying a little bit. I noticed that I would much rather want to continue programming. I love to program and want to learn much more about it. I don't want to study stuff like the American Dream, Globalization, India, Shakespeare... Its a contrast. I am very happy now that school is almost over. I can study freely that what I want. I am (soon) not forced anymore to study stuff that I am not so interested in. I will become a true live long learner and an autodidact. I am not sad about the end of school anymore - at all. I am much happier. I can structure my day the way I want to. I can go outside into the sun and don't have to sit in sticky classrooms.

17/05/17 Having a new experience or doing a comfort zone challenge - Streak 7 Concentration (10min) - Streak 7 Fasting until 12 - Streak 7 Getting up directly - Streak 8 Eating no unreasonable snacks - Streak 7 Eating less than 20g nuts and seeds - Streak 7 Waking up my body outside - Streak 12 Dorsiflexion exercises - Streak 18 Eating no oat meal - Streak 8 Eating no raisins - Streak 8 Eating a raw lunch - Streak 30 Self-Love - Streak 4 Apple cider vinegar in the morning - Streak 18 Gratitude - Streak 63 The new experience: I got a delivery - a futon. I explored a new mountain biking route. I tried to use coconut oil as sun creme. I skyped again. And I was a lot in the sun.

Cool idea. Could you give an example of what you are doing exactly? Its still hard for me to understand the connection, because I have not much experience with AI.

You need to make it more clear what you mean by "more productive." This could mean anything. Then your mind could just trick you and make excuses. It has to be more specific and measurable.

17/05/16 Having a new experience or doing a comfort zone challenge - Streak 6 Concentration (10min) - Streak 6 Fasting until 12 - Streak 6 Getting up directly - Streak 7 Eating no unreasonable snacks - Streak 6 Eating less than 20g nuts and seeds - Streak 6 Waking up my body outside - Streak 11 Dorsiflexion exercises - Streak 17 Eating no oat meal - Streak 7 Eating no raisins - Streak 7 Eating a raw lunch - Streak 29 Self-Love - Streak 3 Apple cider vinegar in the morning - Streak 17 Gratitude - Streak 62 The new experience: I went to the farmers shop and bought apples. I answered a call although I didn't know the number. I asked @Dragallur to do these questions.

"I should waste time" Yesterday I have been reading a few pages in "Loving what is" about underlying beliefs. I identified the belief "I should not waste time" in myself. So I did some inquiry on that: I cannot now whether I should or should not waste time. How could I? Maybe being super productive isn't the thing that will grow me the most. I cannot know that at the moment. How do I feel when I think the through that I shouldn't waste time? I feel kind of stressed. It is not really stressed, but rather a slight stress or discomfort deeper inside my experience. Sometimes I think a lot about what I should do next or how I could manage my time the next day. So is there any stress-free reason to keep that thought? No, just stress-full ones. I could get more done in the moment, but in the long run it will not contribute to my overall happiness. Can I see a reason to drop the thought? Yes. Who would I be without the thought? I would be more in the present moment. I would be more spontaneous. And I would take more opportunities to grow like actually doing comfort zone challenges, doing something new, or socializing more. The turnaround: I should waste time. Normally I have the excuse that these things would take too much time, so I do productive stuff inside of my comfort zone. But when I am open to eventually "waste" a bit of time I will grow more. I would also be more happy and spend for example more time outside. Today I tried to apply this mindset a little bit. After lunch I went outside into the hammock and visualized. And I was grateful for nature.

17/05/15 Having a new experience or doing a comfort zone challenge - Streak 5 Concentration (10min) - Streak 5 Fasting until 12 - Streak 5 (until 1pm Getting up directly - Streak 6 Eating no unreasonable snacks - Streak 5 Eating less than 20g nuts and seeds - Streak 5 Waking up my body outside - Streak 10 Dorsiflexion exercises - Streak 16 Eating no oat meal - Streak 6 Eating no raisins - Streak 6 Eating a raw lunch - Streak 28 Self-Love - Streak 2 Apple cider vinegar in the morning - Streak 16 Gratitude - Streak 61 The new experience: I was with my father at a company to figure stuff out with my car. I realized how complicated all of this is.

Spiritual Purification A few days ago I have been searching for some information about spiritual purification on google. This side came up to me: lightomega.org I have been reading a little bit. Here is some stuff that I learned and still remember: light: unification with the divine / truth darkness: energy that separates us from the divine, duality purification: embodying the light while acknowledging the darkness alignment: "letting the light of the universe work though me," becoming an instrument of divine will and intention I remembered that I have looked at this website about a year ago. I thought it was very esoteric and strange at that time. But now it rather resonates with me. It feels right. It is strange to read stuff about God and actually considering it to be true. It reminded me of a video from Matt Kahn: The Most Important Spiritual Decision. Also Leos video about intuition seems to be connected to this stuff. It makes so much sense and feels so right. To me this stuff basically means that there the universe has already set an intention for my life. I am here for something. And it is in my nature to align myself to that. But it is not easy because society wants us to do other stuff than realizing our true potential. Our intuition guides us towards it, but that is so freaking hard. If we ignore our intuitions we will feel miserable like all the ordinary people. If we surrender to Gods will we will have a great time here on earth. In the last weeks in the morning I was outside in the garden and said something like "Thank you God, for this beautiful nature. Thank you for giving me the consciousness to experience this gift of life... Please give me the power to realize my dreams. Give me the strength to go against the grain of society..." It feels good. I feel grateful and a bit empowered. A year ago I wouldn't do something like this. It was too strange for me at that time - to esoteric. I rather wanted to stay rational and do rather self-inquiry. Now I am more open-minded, follow my intuition and to what feels right.

I would firstly concentrate on Enlightenment and spiritual purification. And after Enlightenment - if I'd have the desire to - I would work on life purpose to make the people more conscious. I would live in nature, be healthy, be happy, and eat the best foods possible.

17/05/14 Having a new experience or doing a comfort zone challenge - Streak 4 Concentration (10min) - Streak 4 (not yet but in a minute) Fasting until 12 - Streak 4 (until 3pm) Getting up directly - Streak 5 Eating no unreasonable snacks - Streak 4 Eating less than 20g nuts and seeds - Streak 4 Waking up my body outside - Streak 9 Dorsiflexion exercises - Streak 15 (not yet but in a minute) Eating no oat meal - Streak 5 Eating no raisins - Streak 5 Eating a raw lunch - Streak 27 Self-Love - Streak 1 Apple cider vinegar in the morning - Streak 15 Gratitude - Streak 60 The new experience: I went with my father to a new farmers shop. I went voting for the first time. I went with my family on a 1.75 hour hike somewhere where I never was before. I skyped with @Dragallur

@Mango1998 good luck I think this could help you a little bit.

@Mango1998 I feel kind of proud of you

Computer stuff I have started to work with Android Studio to program apps with it in the future. But firstly I have to learn all of this stuff. It took hours to get Android Studio downloaded and installed. And this program is so complicated. I tried to follow two tutorials but it just didn't work. This program has bugs and I just cannot fix them. I could ask my father. The could explain me everything. But I want to be able to get this handled on my own. Another thing that annoys me is the operating system. I tried out something new and it doesn't work the way that I want it to. I would have to install the whole operating system and all the software again. I also changed some passwords and sort some stuff out. But then the next thing annoyed be, namely that gmail wanted me to verify my account with a phone number. I don't want to pay money to get a gmail account. Without my father I wouldn't be able to get all this stuff running. Sometimes I think "how will I be ever able to do this all on my own??" Sometimes I doubt whether I really want to study computer science. Some aspects I love, others I hate. I hate all this technical stuff at the beginning. When I understand a program and am able to use it properly I like it. But all the stuff one has to do until it works is so tedious. Stuff just doesn't work and on forums I find no way to fix it. At some point I got so annoyed. Then I just went outside into nature for a few minutes. It was kind of sad that the sun was shining outside and I was the whole time inside in front of computer screens. I remembered that "everything that is should be." Maybe the universe is telling me something with that. I guess this is the path of figuring out ones life purpose exactly. These are the little and bigger challenges at the beginning of this path. The most important thing is that I need to follow my intuition or that what the universe wants me to do. I fear that at some point in my degree I just want to quit. What the fuck should I tell my parents. I fear that I will just continue it and lose track of intuition and just become like the ordinary passionless person. I fear that this computer science degree is not the right thing for me. Maybe I just exaggerate a little bit now. It might be that tomorrow everything works out and I love it all again.

17/05/13 Having a new experience or doing a comfort zone challenge - Streak 3 Concentration (10min) - Streak 3 Fasting until 12 - Streak 3 Getting up directly - Streak 4 Eating no unreasonable snacks - Streak 3 Eating less than 20g nuts and seeds - Streak 3 Waking up my body outside - Streak 8 Dorsiflexion exercises - Streak 14 Eating no oat meal - Streak 4 Eating no raisins - Streak 4 Eating a raw lunch - Streak 26 Apple cider vinegar in the morning - Streak 14 Gratitude - Streak 59 The new experience: I drove with the car to a organic shop and bought a lot of fruits and vegetables. I tried to smile a bit more than usually. I picked up my sister from a friend also with the car. And this night I will stay up until about 1am and watch the eurovision songcontest. I will be super tired.

Yes, a newer version