Candle

I was worried a little bit about your safety and survival. Bcz of constant su'c''al thoughts and other things. Unfortunately some things are beyond our control. (I mean, we forum members can't do anything but write things).

What is one-pointed focus? When everyone is asleep or busy in bs, you are working silently on your projects. You are alone. But confident. When the whole world was asleep, Ambani was building Reliance Jio. And when they launched it, everything changed. It was such a revolution.... No matter how insignificant your work (let's say, reading a book) seems today, you are still doing it. Everything will be counted in the end. You have no idea what's going on in the world and HOW ENORMOUS this world is. It's incredible !!! What's happening in China and Korea? See their tech advancements.

Sisterrrrr........... If you open something in incognito mode, you are not logged in with your account in that mode, so you will be temporarily registered as a guest on the forum. And you can see someone's profile without letting them know. You can also sign out and then see things privately. Incognito is not needed then. Or you can use alternate browser to do this where you are not logged in.

You are referring to what? I was talking about Incognito mode of browser. Not on forum. Don't be offended. I was saying that I wouldn't write shit here, even if you don't get angry.

Welcome. •••••• 📌📌 Note 2. Use discover feature of the forum. Try it yourself, I won't go into its details. It has many features. 7 filters are there. You can save streams too.

Wtf is this 😮? You don't Google basic things. Yesterday you asked me about incognito mode. It's private mode of browser. These are so basic. Btw I also don't know much about stock exchanges. But I won't take advantage of that.

Sugarcute doesn't get angry ever. Studying biology suits @Sugarcoat

Yes I see. So many people are like that. I saw a girl on the forum whose symptoms and behaviours were exactly similar to mine, so similar that I couldn't believe it. It was extremely fascinating. Thanks 🙏🏻. 8 is best for me too bcz I have to do a lot of hobbies too (YouTube educational videos, learning Spanish, etc.)

😄 I have read in someone's journal, where they had written that (12 hrs). It's possible for someone who's passionate. I had done this a few times earlier in my life (and the feeling was great, undescribable.) I know it's possible. Just that I have ADHD, which I'm 100% sure I am gonna defeat in a few months. 12 is just a number. It could be 8 to 12. Productive hours are never 12. 12 includes study breaks also. I'm passionate about science, I just lack focus (it might seem unbelievable, but it's true). I can't see myself that I don't have the extremely sexy knowledge of physics maths and chemistry. I am intrigued by professional science youtubers. Something happens in me seeing them. My brain will face resistance if I do something like this (12 hours). But I know my brain is neuroplastic. It can adapt in just a month. Things that are hard on day 1 get very easy on day 100. I'm replying in this post as well as journaling for myself too. That's why this is a lengthy post.

Mindset. You automatically behave according to the identity you have in your mind. Have enough pride in yourself. Have a great identity (how you see yourself). Feel it. Realise who you are, and what you can do. Realise all your strengths and gifts. Realise what's possible. See the critical situations you have. See the slavery you have done to your weaknesses. See all the shaming others have done to you. See the dungeon. See how much of your potential you have lost. (99%). Then get angry and start doing things. To prove things to yourself. Do great things for your own confidence and self-image. That "I can handle anything. I'm exceptional. I'm advanced. I'm undefeated." Prove this to yourself. Constantly fuel your actions with your identity*, vision, desires, anger, etc. *I mean, constantly see yourself as the person you have to be.

Everyone has shamed me for my academic weaknesses. (earlier I used to be a very good student, but now I am at rock bottom). It looks ugly. It's ugly living with my toxic or abusive family. (I'll write many ugly stories about my family later). It might seem ridiculous to someone that I am treating studies as if it were a battle. Simple academics are so hard !!! Ridiculous, isn't it? But I know how hard is it to study in ADHD. And my ADHD has gotten worse over the years. I'm currently studying Physics Maths & Chemistry. It seems very beautiful to me when someone studies 12 hours a day. I feel extremely bad that I'm missing so much of the beauty. So all my academic weaknesses and shaming have angered me to change the situation completely. I want to prove to myself that I can do anything. I can handle anything. Things like that. I have to prove.

My Identity. Khabib. ✓mastery. ✓one-pointed focus. ✓extraordinary training. ✓confidence that I can handle anything. ✓maturity. ✓composure. ✓aggression when needed. ✓ 29-0 legacy. Link.

Fundamentals. Identity or Self image. Purpose. Focus. Time management. Commitments.

Best acting. (Hindi) Nawazuddin Siddiqui.

Just wanted to share something real quick. When I was a very young child, I used to feel very confined (limited), confused and overwhelmed (and I don't know how to precisely describe the feeling) each time I experienced some emotions and feelings. (bcz they were all new for me) Like nostalgia, slight sexual attraction (I had slight sexual feelings when I was as young as ....let's say 4-6 years old), some subtle sad feelings. Etc. ....... In the initial years of my life on this planet, I had 100 questions like "what is this", "what is that", "what is this feeling?" "why I am feeling so", "what the fuck is this". And I was alone, nobody could answer them. I couldn't get any answer. ....... But as I grew up, where those questions have vanished? Just because I have LANGUAGE today. I have experienced all the emotions and feelings too many times and I have labelled each one of them. (Some of them are so subtle I haven't labelled them, cz our language or dictionary is limited). ....... I was upset and overwhelmed in my initial days, bcz I had no words to describe my feelings and emotions. (Btw what's the difference between feelings and emotions?) Now I have words for them. So it's not a problem now. We humans get very uncomfortable seeing unfamiliar things or alien species. And we have this urge to define them, to describe them, to gain a sense of familiarity. But the interesting thing is : I STILL DON'T KNOW WHAT THEY ARE.

📌📌 Note 1. If privacy is your issue : Don't hide your posts or topics. It's visible to moderators. They will definitely see your hidden posts. Don't let anyone see your sh't. So edit the content (replace everything with a dot) and then hide. Hiding is not the same as deleting. Once I had hidden a topic and saw that someone brought it back. Download your content, edit it, and then hide. Edits are not visible to anyone. Not even Leo. They are not recorded at all maybe. But edits can only be done upto 48 hours. ••••• Use incognito mode to see others' profiles and journals privately (if you don't want to show your activity to others). Open the page in incognito** tab. Use this link to see who's doing what on the forum. Or you can also sign out to see profiles privately. ••••• Those who have long, annoying signatures, ignore their signatures in your settings. (You can't ignore moderators in your settings). You can preview your post before submitting it. Use bookmark button as "upvote" or "save for later". ••••• You can disable your messenger, if you don't want any private messages from anyone. If you want to block messages for a certain period of time, disable the messenger and then enable it later. ••••• If your journals or threads are too long, create an index thread for that. Where you'll index all the important posts of all your journals for quick reference. [Page wise] like this. ••••• If you have to jump to a specific page quickly, just change the page number in the link. Let's say this thread : https://www.actualized.org/forum/topic/103770-random-thoughts/?page=42 ••••• Turn on your email notifications (immediate notifs) to save someone's original post before they edit it. You can see in emails what was written before editing. ••••• **Incognito mode means private mode. (A browser feature).

No my brain just has a different wiring. Everyone has a unique wiring. My attention to detail is maybe very excellent (it can also be Dunning-Kruger Effect bcz... how will I ever know if I have missed some details). Things that I care about in perfectionism, catch my attention. When it comes to fonts and anything like that (writing), my perfectionism is insane. Sometimes it causes me trouble while writing something important, when I care about perfect handwriting. Autism has both pros and cons. Everyone has a different kind of autism. I may or may not have severe autism. Read the 5th point. Here Also there might be some supernatural stuff I don't know about them. I have much intuition, which I think is common. I catch nuanced and subtle things too much. In a detailed way.

I am extremely angry when I become cringeworthy sometimes. I am self-judgemental. I judge myself 1000x more than other people. How much others judge me? It's negligible.

(Note : I haven't read even the title or the original post). 📌 You are always writing about "don't make stories". What's the problem is it's a real story? If I am doing only focused thinking and not unnecessary thinking. 📌 If I am preparing for a future possibility of a tragedy, but not worrying unnecessarily, Is there any problem? 📌 If you are telling not to make any stories bcz stories are meaningless. Then everything is meaningless afterall. Thoughts and emotions don't mean anything. Emotions are meaningless and misleading, stupid brain chemicals. Yes I agree. So should we stop giving importance to all our emotions? Emotions of grief too ? If we lost a loved one?

My Perfectionist, autistic brain caught something. Can u notice? Letters j and g are not fully written (a tiny part is cut at the bottom). More ink was needed at the bottom.

Just 1-2 months. Just waiting for the posting limits to increase then I will bombard the forum with 1000s of posts per month. And all of them would be good or useful. No shitposts. And I won't take much time. I will post in my free time only. My target : 100,000 posts by 2035.

That's why we can write anything in your journal, without caring too much. JK. still you are better than chatgpt.

Psychology. 😄😄😄 It's not exactly fear. I'm NOT afraid of anyone. But an uneasy feeling like "sh't what happened now.... !! ". Because I have doubt that that message might be a bit negative or troubling or someone might have been bothered by some action of mine. Happens when a phone call or whatsapp message comes to me. Or someone replies to my posts. I don't like receiving messages from even my family members (bcz it has some trouble associated with it 9/10 times). Btw I rarely get phone calls. But when it comes, it makes me feel a "little" uneasy. Happens with anyone else here? Reason is that because I have had some bad experiences in past related to calls, whatsapp messages, etc. Bcz I have received negative or argumentative comments, troubling phone calls that had created drama in my life in past, disturbing messages, etc. Bcz when you write 10,000 good things, no one will message you. (1/10,000) chance. (Yes exceptions are also there, when people want something from you they message you, or when they just want some fun, they do so.) But when you do 1 thing that looks negative, then people will definitely message you. So 6/10 messages don't feel good to me. Of course there are times you receive normal or appreciative messages.

Short video Interesting for me to know.