The_spanish_guy

Great! We are almost neighbours :-) Yep, my life has always been ruled by selfsabotage. It's mandatory for my to pay attention very closely to what's going on there. My therapist says that it has to do with my fear of failure. You are right man, nowadays porn and wanking (never heard of this word xD) constitutes a big part of my life. It has always been very helpful when I,ve felt completely lost. If things goes "right" I don't masturbate more than once a day, or even zero. It sounds easy, but it will be difficult to put it into practice. According to my principles sure I've lost direction, man... Don't you think that forcing the mind to obey your desire is more ego fighting and in the long run it will produce an unwanted result (more monkey mind) I will remind your advice. My default mental behaviour is very likely to play this kind of tricks and try to change the focus in order to not facing suffering, fear, etc.

Absolutely yes. As some of you may now, I am going through a very challenging time at this point of my life. Almost nobody knows about it, just my family, and of course my therapist. The reason why I don't open up more is because I'm convinced that my story would be too awkward to understand for others and they will look at my as I am a perfect mental disturbed person. When it comes to talk about more common issues like family troubles or dating insecurities I usually don't have any problem at all, at least with my best friends. The rest of the people don't care too much about me, so I prefer to keep wearing my "everything is fine" mask, just as they do.

Already taking antidepressants, on CBT, also practising exercise and healthy diet (but not vegetarian or vegan). Restarted meditating. Thx for answering! And yes, you are right, I also have "silent" rituals, like the one you named ;-) I am from Andalucia too, my friend! From Granada :-D Nowadays I have sadly become in that kind of introvert guy fearful of the world...I hope I could change this shit one day! Love the way you mix english and spanish. Really funny! ¡Que Dios te bendiga, amigo mio!

This exercise sounds good to me. I will give it a go for sure, starting tomorrow ;-)

You are maybe right too, my friend. As I've said before I have always been a people pleaser. My selfsteam is also quite low, specially these days. But if your theory is true, won't it be even worse for me to remain shy and introvert. This attitude could be even more damaging for me, I think... Sometimes a bit of socializing can relief your mind for pain, and mental masturbation by connecting with people...

To be honest, I don't wanna leave my weight routine. I have invested a lot of effort during years in achieving a good shape to let it go. I could maybe slow my peace 50% if it really helps me to reduce my anxiety. I will start a softer, more relax routine next week to give it a go.

Now that you mentioned it I think you are probably right. Always after finishing my wight lifting routine I feel more stressed out than usual. There is maybe a connection between these two. Apart from that I know a lot of people from my gym, even friends, that do not feel anxiety because of exercising. So, I suppose it depends of the person... Thanks for the video. I will give it a go!

Well, my OCD has more to do with getting obsessed with the irrelevant visual/sound information I receive through my senses and that my conscious mind do not want to discriminate than with random thoughts related with hygiene/me having a cancer/me hurting people. That's why meditating is so difficult for me. I just can't turn off/let go all these stimulation that surrounds me all the time...

Found it! I will call for more info ;-)

Thanks a lot my friend. Currently taking CBT, but feeling a bit disappointed about it. It seems like meditation will be completely necessary for me. The thing is that it's so damn painful to stay alone with my monkey mind that it's seems like by meditating I am only feeding my obsessions... I had strong OCD so I feel like I can help you. Congratulations my friend. Not sure how severe your OCD was, but if it was at least as intense as mine, man, you are like Neo from the Matrix to me, almost like a god among humans. Mind blowing...

I'm actually not that addicted to porn. I spend 2, maybe 3 hours everyday masturbating. But it is for sure my more immediate source of joy these days. That's how I am coping with suffering. Same for YT and gym. But anyway what you say it resonates with me a lot. Every time I am more immersed in the virtual world and less in touch with real life. And yep, sometimes it's difficult for me to discriminate one from the other. Internet means safety, the real world pain and caos... Anyway I will take a look at the website you linked Give a child everything it wants, whenever it asks for it, what kind of person will it grow up to be? My life has been just like this the last 5/6 years. Less and less taking action each time, as my OCD has become more intense...

I am a absurd mental person. Also suffer from dp/dr (I just realized it yesterday, after reading the definition). It's so damn difficult for me to stay focus and let myself go, to flow... Thanks for the advise my friend. Already taking meds.

Completamente, amigo. Siempre he tenido muchos requisitos para ser feliz. He sido muy perfeccionista siempre y, o todo estababa mi gusto, o me frustraba enormemente. Siempre me he esforzado más por transformar mi realidad que por aceptarla. Gracias por haber respondido en español. ¿De donde eres?