TruthFreedom

I have had full-on awakenings where I was laughing my ass off. I was not under the influence of psychedelics. This was about 6 years ago, and it was an amazing time in my life. But enlightenment does not create permanent happiness. If anything it makes you more isolated, and unable to relate to "normal" people and situations. I never made a big deal about my enlightenment. I told a few people and they probably thought it was the rambling of a madman. Since then I have had two suicide attempts, experienced psychosis, and struggled with alcohol. Currently, I don't enjoy what the world has to offer. I live an ascetic, contemplative life. I don't have many friends. It's not depression, it's more like anhedonia. That's why I drink sometimes, because I can enjoy things more. I always imagined that enlightenment would lead to permanent happiness, but as you can see, this is not the case. I wonder where I have gone wrong. If what Leo says is true, then I am one of only about 10,000 people on the planet who have awakened to this degree. I wonder what I am supposed to do next.

What makes me happy is interacting with other human beings, But it also has a tendency to make me miserable. Recently I have just been completely avoiding people for that reason. I don't like the fact that my happiness can be so affected by others. Hence, wanting to achieve a state where I am happy regardless of outside circumstances.

Also, cetus was talking about Steve-O in his last message, not me.

Yes, but instead of jumping into giving advice, he had faith.

Maybe I am spending too much time looking at the finger that is pointing, rather than looking at what the finger is pointing to. Haha

The Buddha found something that transcended death. That is what I thought I had found. But of course, what I found was beyond thought, or the intellect. That's why intellectual discussions about consciousness completely miss the point.

He had an alcohol problem too. Seems RV's make him a lot happier 😊

Thankyou!!

I am attempting to achieve unconditional happiness which does not depend on anything external. I achieved it for a few weeks 6 years ago. I can't understand why it left me. I thought it would be permanent. But for those few weeks I was in pure ecstasy and bliss.

It was experiencing consciousness in it's purest form, separate from matter, It was becoming God, Hence the repetition of the phrase "Oh My God!!" Best experience of my life It was multiple spiritual orgasms.

It's easy to assume that some random guy who has an alcohol problem cannot be enlightened, But that is a very unenlightened assumption.

I know it's easy to fool oneself. But I genuinely achieved enlightenment, I was laughing hysterically, saying "oh my god" over and over again. I had been meditating non-stop for weeks.

@The Crocodile is it worth a watch?

They still do sometimes. Testicles, as well as toys.

Is comedy the Truth? Think about it...

My life prior to this thread was a tragedy. Now I know it is a comedy!

Well, yeah, because you need to use drugs. I did it completely sober. But your videos definitely helped.

That's what UnbornTao isn't realising, hahaha I've admitted that my "experience" has not been wholly positive since achieving enlightenment, Which he/she assumes means that I never reached that state. Hahaha!

Thankyou hahaha

Of course it was an experience! Hahaha Everything is an experience. Keep digging

You must still have only a conception of enlightenment. I have seen the other side, believe me.

Possibly. Maybe I should have used my enlightenment in a more constructive way, rather than sitting around ordering pizza.

😆

Seeing as a "location" depends on "something else" being located "somewhere else" Can we say that anything actually has a location? A location refers to something always in reference to where it is, relative to something else. 🤔

Yeah TruthFreedom, I'm in your mom's bedroom Lol