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Notes The many dimensions of meaning and meaninglessness. One of the most challenging paradoxes that I have been dealing with recently is the paradox of meaning. What is meaning exactly? How is it that a thought is simultaneously meaningful and meaningless? How is it that a thought can have more than one meaning? How is it that one meaning can have more than one thought? I’ve managed to resolve all of these but I have no idea how I will explain it. All I can do is try. If you look at your “computer” right now you will see that it has defined edges, everything within the boundaries of the computer is defined as “the computer”. If you look around “the computer” you will see that the boundaries of “the computer” draw their meaning from the objects that surround it. “The wall” behind or “the desk” underneath or “the space” between it and whatever happens to be near it. If you look at “the wall” you will see that it is defined by “the computer” in front and “the desk” in front. If you look at “the desk” you will see that it is defined by “the computer” on top and “the wall” behind. You can keep doing this for all of the objects and spaces that you see and you will discover that no object or space can be defined without a relationship to another object or space. Even if your computer was floating in a vacuum it would still be defined by “space” and “space” would be defined by “the computer”. Reality is a completely closed system of objects that draw their definition from other objects. No object can exist outside of reality because if it existed outside of reality it would draw its meaning from reality and would therefore be a part of reality. This is how reality is non-dual. There is only one reality, with a continuous spectrum of objects in a continuous spectrum of dimension. Meaning isn’t an object and it doesn’t exist within any object. Meaning is in the relationship between objects. There are an infinite number of ways to define an object because reality is a continuous spectrum, to keep my explanation simple I will keep my definition of objects in two discrete categories; physical and metaphysical. A physical object is something like your computer in front of you. A metaphysical object is something like the word “computer” as it happens in your mind. There are many different dimensions through which objects can relate to each other, to keep my explanation simple I will only cover the dimensions of space, time and vibration. I’m going to begin with language and how words draw their meaning from other words (metaphysical objects draw their meaning from other metaphysical objects). Two key ideas I got from this clip in waking life are that “words are inert, they’re just sounds, and they’re dead” and that language is a “system of symbols”. Words as objects on their own are completely meaningless. If you sit down and repeat the word “word” over and over again a few thousand times or if you hear a word in a language you don’t speak you will understand this. Words only have meaning when they’re part of a system of other words (language). Every single word when separated from its language is meaningless, but when it is integrated with the system it has a meaning because of its relationship to all the other words. This is how words are simultaneously meaningful and meaningless. If each word is simultaneously meaningful and meaningless then the entire language is simultaneously meaningful and meaningless. This TED talk provides an incredible demonstration of how meaning is baked into words through language in space and time (I will cover the vibrational aspect later). The word “computer” draws its meaning from the words that are closely related to it: words like “hard drive” or “monitor” and those words draw their meaning from words that are closely related to them. If you keep going logically you see that every word depends on every other word within a language. But a language is not a closed system. Entire languages draw their meaning from other languages. If you consider the clustering of related languages on the globe like the Latin languages (French, Spanish, Portuguese, Italian etc.) you will see that they are situated close together geographically (like the individual words in their semantic neighborhoods) and that the words within each language are closely related. Just like the word astronomy is related to the words science and moon; French is related to the languages Spanish and Italian. The same goes for languages like German, Dutch, Danish and Polish, Czech, Russian etc. The further and further you move out geographically the more and more meaningless the words become to a language like French, once you get to Mandarin and Cantonese there is no meaningful relationship between the words in French and the words in Mandarin but they are still dependent upon each other. Just like if you follow astronomy to moon to light to eye to arm the word arm doesn’t really have a meaningful relationship with the word astronomy but they are still dependent upon each other. This relationship between words in mental space is not static and fixed. It is constantly morphing on both the global and individual level through different degrees of time. If you consider the evolution of the relationships between languages over hundreds of years you would see language groups occupy different geographic areas as a result of conquest, famine, agriculture, technological advancement etc. This is still happening it’s just not noticeable because it happens over a longer period of time. But if you consider how individual words within one language relate to each other you would see that the relationships change much more rapidly. For example over the last two years the words Politics and Trump have moved much closer together in most western minds, but 10 years ago those words would have been very far apart and in another 10 years they will be far apart again (hopefully). When words are used together in a specific order to be delivered in a set period of time higher order meanings arise. Just like when you read this sentence. Each word in the sentence has its own meaning that it draws from the words in its semantic neighborhood, but the entire sentence has its own meaning that it draws from all of the words that have been laid out in this specific order to be read in a specific frame of time. The first words of this post are completely dead to you now. You only need to be focusing on the small number of words in this exact sentence to gain this exact higher order meaning that will then fit into all of the other higher order meanings from all of the sentences before to get higher, higher order meaning. I’m going to stop here for now because I need to plan the direction of my delivery. This will probably take me a few days to spit out.

Sorry, I didn't mean to sound like there was something wrong with you. You just seemed like you wanted to know what everyone was talking about so I was throwing out ideas. If you're asexual, you're asexual. Nothing wrong with that

You should go and get your iron levels checked. Iron deficiency is very common among young women. Your chances are even higher because you are vegetarian (I assume you don't eat red meat) and double higher because you exercise. You lose iron in exercise when haemoglobin and myoglobin in your blood and muscles break down. Even if you take supplements you can still be deficient because there are lots of things that inhibit iron absorption in the diet, so the way you take your supplement is very important. For example if you take an iron tablet and then drink tea right after you wont absorb much. Iron is very important for a healthy menstural cycle, which is important for a healthy balance of sex hormones, which is important for libido. Go check it out.

Jackpot! ... shit, I'm already trying to fit myself into it.

I know nothing. Nothing can help you. This ends here.

It looks like Adyashanti is upping his marketing game. Some of his books and audio programs are free to download until the end of September. http://www.adyashanti.org/cafedharma/index.php?file=audio Take advantage guys.

@Iam Monopoly: The ultimate test of unconditional love.

Hahaha, this is awesome! If you keep doing stuff like this you will eventually get to the point where nothing bothers you anymore. People will look down on you to begin with (especially if you aren't confident yet) and you will feel really insecure but eventually you will loosen up and you will have so much more fun in life. Then people will begin to admire your freedom and even look up to you. That is where you need to be careful, it's really easy to get stuck in the identity of "the rebel" because it's so much fun. You can make a subtle ego that thinks its better than everyone because you have the courage to do the things nobody else will dare to do. I got stuck in that for a long time because almost nobody is going to pull you out of it. I think this is a legitimate spiritual practice, it grinds down the insecure parts of your ego but it builds up your confidence. So it's not complete. This ted talk covers some similar things. So does this video by Sadhguru.

@jjer94 I think you'll really like this artist. Didn't know which song to choose, they're all so good. A thousand years, I've got time, I've come a long way. A thousand years, I've lost time, I've come a long way. A thousand years, i am life, I've come a long way. A thousand years, i am life, I've come a long way.

I've developed a similar philosophy, it's a little different but it ties in well with this. I call it "pulling a Stevo". I'm also passive-aggressively asserting my countries athletic superiority, given the Olympics is now sweeping the globe. Pulling a Stevo means you basically just letting people do whatever until the flaws of ego start to break down naturally. When that happens be there to plant seeds and provide support passively. I don't discuss non-duality/spirituality with anyone, but recently I've felt the strong urge to just go out and try to "fix" everybody. (obviously still got some work to do ) I've realised that nobody needs to be fixed. They will break down on their own because the ego is fundamentally flawed. I just need to be there to help pick up the pieces if it's needed.

Won't be posting for a while.

Notes The Evolution of Creativity, Meaning and Awareness Through Life and Death I know it sounds quite morbid but I've been contemplating death pretty much all-day everyday for a few months now. Initially it was sad and terrifying as it is for most people, but as my awareness around it grew so did my appreciation for it. It truly is life's greatest gift. I noticed that as my awareness grew my perspective on life, death, control, creativity and what I found meaningful started to change. I think there is a general pattern a person moves through as they grow through this mess so I wanted to write down my thoughts on it. When we usually think of death we think of our death or the deaths of our loved ones. The undeniable inevitability of it or the shock of it actually happening is a rude awakening to the dream like fantasies of the ego. Awareness towards life and our place in life begins to set in. Awareness to the emptiness of what we used to pursue when we were "asleep" also becomes clear. As this awareness grows we become more and more attuned to our lack of control. There is an inverse relationship between our level of awareness and what we believe we can control. This is a key insight that I had. This is why there is increasing internal conflict as we move into higher and higher states of awareness – we are forced to let go of more and more control until eventually we surrender to life. For me the shock of death completely turned my attention inwards and I began to reflect on what was really meaningful to me. The realisation that there was no control over other people or most external circumstances drove me to seek meaning in relationships, in creating things, in contributing, in living with as few regrets as possible. Phrases like “carpe diem” and “do not go gentle into that good night” resonated strongly with me, right now its laughable to think that a day is something to be seized or that the night is something you go into. I had the attitude of Jason Silva in this video: I think this is what stoicism is at it's core, having enough awareness to know that you can't control everything but too little to realise that trying to control your internal states, your emotions, your thoughts and your attitude is just as futile. Creativity becomes much more central in ones life and it is driven by the conflict between inner and outer. All creativity is driven by conflict. When a person becomes “creative” in the artistic sense the conflict is internal. The artist wrestles with himself to create out of a sense of obligation to life or urgency in the face of death. This is where personal development becomes attractive, an attempt is made to gain control over “the self” because it is believed that the only obstacle to achieving whatever it is we want to create is “the self” which is true. As we become more and more aware of the internal state, the aperture of control constricts again. We begin to realise that we cannot control our thoughts or our emotions, that our behaviour is governed by deeply seeded beliefs that we had no say in adopting, that the very structure of our thoughts is completely fabricated and that there truly is no meaning to anything. For me this was a cause of great despair. The only thing that offered any kind of relief was meditation and spiritual work. These practices continue to raise awareness to the point that it is realised that death and endings are intrinsic to everything, which of course brings an end to the despair. I like this scene from the last samurai where Katsumoto explains the meaning of Bushido. Adyashanti and Sadhguru both discuss the same thing here. Once awareness has digested life and death into itself then all that remains is unity. There is no creativity driven by conflict anymore, there is no search for meaning to life. Meaning just happens within life. "you don't have to fight it anymore, it's not something you have to do battle with" - Adyashanti "If you do not know life and death at the same time you are only half alive, which is torture "- Sadhguru There is just pure creation and you are that, moving through that, as that. ***

If it wasn't possible to get out of enlightenment, everybody would be enlightened.

So like, stop doing that. No, it isn't. But having a boyfriend isn't going to make you unhappy either. It's only an issue if you make it an issue. Something was wrong. You were feeling confused and conflicted but you were suppressing that with your "idea" that there is nothing wrong, you haven't actually realised that nothing is wrong. Because you have been suppressing your confusion, you now: Why not try talking to your s/o about all this. You said he's into spirituality. A relationship is just two people sharing themselves with each other, right? If you're going to be in one, why not do it well? How bullshit is the ted talk? ... 100% Just like everything else, including your problem and my opinion.

Enlightenment video was the first one I watched because I was researching it, my reaction: Now I'm here. Watched everything uploaded in the past year.

When you are practising neti-neti you are becoming aware of an experience and then noting that the experience is not you (because you are experiencing it, you logically deduct that you cannot be it) and then you become aware of the next experience and you repeat. When you are practising the letting-go technique, you are becoming aware of an experience and then you are just letting it go and becoming aware of the next experience and you repeat. They're both getting you to do the same thing, it's just described differently. If you keep doing this sooner or later it will dawn on you what you are. But you can't control that and nobody can tell you what "that" is. Paradoxically, you will merge with experiences, so you stop seeing experience as different from you. Again, it isn't something you can actually do, it just happens when it happens, so keep recognising experiences, feeling them and moving on. You don't actually have to "move on" to the next experience, it will just arrive by itself. Strong determination sitting just makes this process more intense i.e. you practice with more intense experiences like pain, so you drop your bullshit quicker. You don't need to do strong determination sitting though, you can do this lying down in your bed with stuffed toys and it will still work.

I died.

Notes The fourth wall: A metaphor for the gate-less gate, the joke of life and the trap of stories. In the same way that being pulled out of a movie actually makes it more engaging, becoming more detached from life makes it more fulfilling. I like to think of the ego as an artist trying to portray a better version of reality. It needs to use stories to do this and so it's fundamentally limited, in the same way movies are.

Hey, if your parents won't let you travel on your own, you could convince them to let you go on a youth exchange. I did one through Rotary straight after high school. I didn't have to pay anything and got to travel over 15 countries when I was 17-18! Here's a link to their basic site, you'll have to check your own countries info to find out more about it. It was really awesome, I'd recommend it to anyone.

Week 6 Death approaches. My vision shall hold. May he dislodge the roots of ignorance and cast the weeds aside. That I may relish life, with the freedom of a dead man.

Notes: SDS training wheels; how to increase SDS time rapidly WARNING: experimental technique I thought I would just briefly cover how I increased my SDS time from 1 to 3+ hours overnight for anyone who is interested. I combined technology, with some knowledge of physiology, yoga and hypnosis. I'll briefly describe exactly what I did and the theory behind it. In this video Shinzen Young explains how becoming goal oriented in SDS time rather than in psychological transformation can be a hindrance in spiritual development, so it's something to keep in mind. The goal is not to see how much you can take. Firstly, to be able to sit longer you need to develop your concentration, sensory clarity and equanimity. I presume that these are higher brain functions that happen in the neo-cortex/ frontal lobes. The Ted talk below explains how stress in the body causes a “self-lobotomy” of higher brain function. The biggest factor in this mental shut-down is irregular heart rate. It turns out that you can influence your heart rate by controlling your breath, there are a lot of details to how this works (you can follow your nose around these journal articles if you want to learn more about this) To cut a long story short, when you inhale your heart rate increases and when you exhale it decreases. To keep your heart rate regular the time you spend inhaling and exhaling in each breath needs to be constant and even, you can watch how Neil's rate increases and decreases evenly after he begins the breathing exercise. To lower your average heart rate the inhale should be shorter than the exhale, i.e. you spend less time increasing (inhale) and more time decreasing (exhale). You can increase your heart rate by doing the opposite - take long deep inhales and rapidly exhale. This is a cool hack I use to help me wake up quickly in the morning, it gets my blood pumping fast so I can metabolise the sleep hormones quickly. The problem is, when you begin this process you have low concentration and sensory clarity so you won't be able to keep it up very long. This is where I incorporated technology, yoga and self-hypnosis. I sampled one line from Sadhguru's isha kriya meditation using audacity (a free audio editing program) and put it on my phone to play in a loop. The idea is to take and hold the two thoughts: “I am not this body” “I am not even the mind” with inhalation and exhalation respectively. Notice that this ensures that your inhale will be shorter than your exhale and the duration will be the same for every full breath. This is what we want to keep your heart rate low and regular, and your higher brain function running so you can practice concentration clarity and equanimity better. With each inhalation and thought “I am not this body” I “felt” my entire body, washing my attention over the whole thing, noting any sensations, emotions and practising equanimity to the best of my ability with anything I felt. Then when I switched my attention to exhaling and the thought “I am not even the mind” I practised witnessing the internal talk and images that arose as I said “I am not even this mind” The subconscious mind is programmed by plain repetition, so as you're doing this you are basically brainwashing yourself to dissociate from the body and the mind to the witnessing state. I also used the insight mediation app to sound interval bells every 30 minutes, because it makes it easier to keep going when you have an idea of how much time you've done. Over the coming week I increased the time between interval bells until I was able to sit the full 3 hours without any time reference, then I stopped using the audio and was able to sit motionless, for a full 3 hours without any mantras or tech within a week. Additional notes: Begin with a growth mindset, your first sits don't have to be perfect. If you have to move to readjust your back or whatever then do it, an imperfect long sit is better than a perfect short sit because you will work through more resistance, it doesn't take long to perfectly still. To get a good posture I visualised a helium balloon taped to the top of my head gently pulling it up to the sky. I eventually found the sweet spot where my back was straight and stable without using any muscles. I noticed that breathing was difficult when my back/abdominal muscles were too contracted. You could just start out in a chair which would make this easier.

Notes: An In depth analysis of morality and decision making:

I've been getting into this weird genre recently. I think it is affecting my mind because I am become much more aware of subtle sounds that I wouldn't have payed attention to before. I can hear the differences in the sound of clocks ticking or the differences in peoples voices at various stages of breath.

Hey, I found an explanation to this! Shinzen Young describes this with some formulas: https://youtu.be/9u9nuSf9g1g When your equanimity develops and you apply it to pleasant sensations you experience greater fulfilment, when your resistance to pleasure decreases you experience less frustration. I have been meditating a lot recently and this has been happening to me to crazy degrees. Just the brush of my cloths on my body or the refreshing feeling of a blink are extremely enjoyable. As for the black emptiness; maybe you became aware of some subconscious processing for the first time? I'm not sure what this is to be honest. It's happened to me a lot and I'm still reasonably functional so it can't be all bad.

I've got the goods guys. I haven't read the way of the superior man and I haven't practised this in a Taoist/spiritual context but I know how to have multiple orgasms as a guy. You basically have to practice separating out ejaculation from orgasm on two levels: 1. Physically Implement a training regemen to practice isolating and contracting your pubococcygeus (PC) muslce. Link to a basic guide here Its the muscle that spasms when you ejaculate and its the muscle that you use if you want to stop the flow of urine abruptly. What you have to do is isolate this muscle and this muscle only. This is quite challenging. It's like learning how to raise your recessive eyebrow independently, or flare your nostrils, or move your ears. It's a very specific small muscle that you have to single out. You can't contract any of the other muscles near it and you need to keep your entire core relaxed so that you can breath into your belly when it's go time. Once you've singled it out (which might take a few days of trial and error) practice flexing it as per the guide above until you can hold it like a fucking vice for ~2min, this took me a few months of daily exercise. Once you've got this down you're ready for phase 2. 2. Mentally You can practice this during the months you're exercising but it's really really difficult to keep focused. Pleasure is way harder to be equanimous with than pain. You want to grade your sexual arousal level on a scale of 1-10 (1 being "I've got semi" 10 being "awkward cum face") Practice this first while masturbating because it's hard to do for real. Arouse yourself up to a 4-5 and then death grip your PC whilst fully relaxing your core and breathing the pleasure into your belly and over your body. Once your'e back down to a 2-3 go again up to a 5-6 and death grip/breath. Keep doing this until you get all the way up to a 10 without blowing your load. Congratz, you can have multiple orgasms! Also, your orgasms will be much fuller and richer than before. This phase took me about 2 months to really master. You're basically training your muscle out of autonomic nervous control to full somatic control, so it takes time, but it's totally worth it. Greatest discovery I made as a teenage boy.