Ce

Hi Pereira, I sometimes sit, and when a thought enters my mind, I put it in a black balloon, and let it float towards the other black balloons in the sky. It teaches you to not immediately react to a thought that's entering your mind, but just let it be. Just set a timer for what period you have to not react to your thoughts. Don't be over ambitious at first, just try 2 minutes, and then work your way up to 10 or 20 minutes. Leo has a long video about it: Please let me know how it goes. Kind regards, Cedric

Doing something else (vacium and mopping) actually was enough to fix my bad mood.

I have just spent a few hours on a project to run my DJ software under linux from a thumb drive. It didn't succeed, so I felt it like a personal failure. This is not needed, as I don't really need the project to succeed, I can do everything without it. So, there's no pressure, the only thing I don't like is that it has taken time. Kind regards, Cedric

A bit off topic, but I have also asked my friends to help me with my diet. I have told them I only eat one of every type of snack at parties. That created some cool moments, like what color of M&M's I already had eaten and so on. But it does help. It completely removes the social pressure to eat just to show them you like the food. In fact it's replaced by them reminding me (in more or less subtitle ways :-) ) to only eat one, instead of 2 or more. I lost 20 pounds since I've told them. Ok, I also done other things, like not snack at home, and walk to the office one in a while, but still it helps. Kind regards, Cedric

Next morning, I have first attended a party of a friend of mine. Arrived late, because I wanted to finish the movie first. I honestly told my friend, instead of giving a fake reason. Had a great time talking to people i never met before, and was honored that they said it was nice to meet you on their way home. I watched some porn last night, but I managed to keep all the screens out of the bedroom. Watched some porn this morning. And went to the forum to write this. Look like I have work to do to get porn out of my habits. I guess I can better go to bars instead of porn websites, I notice I don't dare doing that. Is that my fear of rejection? Is it that I don't want to pay for drinks? Am I afraid to look like a fool? There's no need for that, as I have proven to myself I can talk to perfect strangers, and they like me for it. Kind regards, Cedric

Hi Phil, To me it sounds like we play the same game. We both rely on others to give us the feeling we have done something good. I must say I'm honored that I get reputation points, but that's not the goal I'm after. I am just using the other people on this forum to keep me accountable for my actions. One wise man once told me that there's only one guy you can compare yourself to, and that's your former self. Just remember, it's worth it to do something because you *think* the other person would like it. If you do the things in a way that doesn't betray yourself, other people will notice. Some people will say they don't like it, others will say they like it. Based on that you can choose who you want to hang out with a little more, and who you can hang out with a little less. I notice i am rambling now, but I do want to thank you for your post. It shows me that my post matters to you. Lastly, what are reputation points worth at the end of the day? You cannot eat them, you cannot trade them, they are only a trick in your mind to make you feel better. Kind regards, Cedric

OK, I have taken myself off the computer, and completed doing the dishes. It looks like a small thing, but it shows me it's very powerful to make myself accountable by showing my day to strangers. Now I only have to remove the need for an audience, and I'm one step closer.

Hi All, Someone told me taking the first step is worth more than the biggest plan, so here's my first attempt on keeping a public journal: The night: I have watched a lot of youtube video's last night, also at 3:00 am, and at 6 in the morning. I have to replace this bad habit with something better. I now have removed m laptop from the bedroom, and placed some books. Tomorrow I will report it it has worked. The day: I have made a long list of stuff to do, and now I am doing the stuff that involves my computer. But I also play a lot of videogames in between (and even during) the tasks tat involve my computer. I have to stop that, and do a single task from start to finish, then play a game, and then do the next task from start to finish. Also, i have to do some stuff that's not computer related, if I'm not carefull, it's not getting done today. Also, i don't take the time to eat properly. I grab something, and then eat it in front of my PC. Not the correct way to do it. Looking back at what I have written, I'm not that satisfied with the current state of affairs. Time to change them :-) Kind regards, Cedric

Hi Austin, I also have friends that like to stay up very late. I routinely hang out with them, and then leave early. In the beginning I was scared they would think less of me for doing this, but it turns out they respect it, and even help me to keep my schedule. Is it possible for you to discuss this, ask them for help? I can imagine you can say at the beginning of the night at what time you want to leave. If your friends are good friends, they will make sure you leave on time :-) So in summary: don't think you have to stay late, and also, don't do stuff just because you think they will like you for it. Kind regards, Cedric

Hi All, I just noticed when I loose at a game, I basically run away, and I then hastely do something that gives me a quick sense of accomplishment. The worst I can do at that point is to start a new game, hoping that it will give me the pleasure I'm looking for. The best thing I can do is to give myself some time to feel the disappointment of loosing the game, get myself together, and then do something productive. Also, it's time to ask myself why I play the game in the first place. What am I running away from? Kind regards, Ce