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That’s what interests me the most! What’s next after one has deconstructed the ego? Does it all start again or is that it?

I actually find the construct/ego aware stage extremely relevant to my own experiences. There are only a few small parts of the unitive stage which resonate with me. Based on that, I believe I can fairly deduce my own centre of gravity within the model. What is also fantastic about the model is that I’m able to use it to contemplate what aspects of my life are trapped in the lower stages. This has given me some great insight into where to focus my contemplation in order to grow as a person. I do agree with @Carl-Richard that the model itself is very limited when considering it outside of the western world. As a white male based in the UK, I have found it frighteningly accurate to my own life experiences, and that of others around me.

You haven’t awoken to anything until all that has been in your life collapses. Come back and share the real truth of life when the house of cards has tumbled down

Sounds like you need a good dose of humility @Davino. Are you truly being open minded when you participate in this forum? I think if we were all more honest with ourselves then the realisation of the immeasurable depth that which we are lacking in love would become revealing.

What do you wish to pick, love or lust? Best of luck!

Having had high and low libido, I can say with certainty that high libido is fantastic. The challenge is finding a way to channel the high libido energy into meaningful pursuits and purposes. When you lack these things, the sexual energy can feel unbearable.

Social calibration is culture. Culture defines what is socially acceptable and what is not. Different cultures have different social calibration, therefore different social rules exist depending upon the culture you are immersed in. In terms of authority, you are. You are the one experiencing social calibration, and thus you have the capacity to conform or not to conform to the social normative of that culture. The feature, and not the bug, is that social calibration is real in the sense that it exists via interactions with others. You can’t get rid of it, but you can decide if you wish to follow the defined social rules of the culture. @mr_engineer; I hope that was more useful than other posts. If you want more clarity then just @ me.

Congratulations @retroAA!

My personal advice would be not to date, you’re clearly not in a fit place and it would be unfair on your partner to nurse you through your problems. I do think you should find a social activity that you enjoy doing. This may lead to addressing some of your issues by experiencing life as opposed to being stuck in a mental maelstrom. Regular social interaction through an activity that you enjoy doing will lead to exposure to dating in a more gentle and accessible way without placing pressure on you to act. Unfortunately, you will have to leap from the nest and fly at some point; in reference to dating and sex. It will be uncomfortable but also liberating. TLDR; find a weekly social activity you enjoy doing which exposes you to new people, new ideas, and new experiences. Best of luck

Well done @Espaim, very inspiring! I had previously quit alcohol for just over a year after my grandad died. It sparked the much needed realisation of what a terrible person I was. Ironically I have had that same realisation again on my 32nd birthday. Since then it’s been almost a month without drinking and I don’t plan to go back anytime soon. What’s quite extraordinary is how alcohol, and any addiction in general, suppresses the deep suffering inside oneself. The hardest days are always the first few when one has to adjust to having to sit alone in silence with that suffering. After that, the suffering becomes the way and the light at the end of the tunnel reveals itself. Godspeed to all those who are on the path to overcoming their addictions.

Lots of deep wisdom in this particular quoted post, thanks for sharing @Carl-Richard

Stay strong Brother @Husseinisdoingfine.

Well done @retroAA!! As an alcoholic, by my own definition of someone who can’t control when to drink, I’ve been alcohol free for 15 days which is been the the longest period of time by a significant amount in the last 3 years. Addiction to any substance is a horrible way to exist. Keep up the fight!

I am now going to have to watch this based on @Tenebroso feedback

Apologies all, I should of provided more information and clarity in my original post. I have already undertaken a significant spiritual journey into the absolute two years ago. This was through 30 trips of breakthrough doses of DMT where I finally experienced both physical and metaphysical death. The cost was complete dissociation from everyday life and borderline insanity. The experience and outcome, for those who have undergone such a journey, is forever life changing. As it currently stands in this period of my life, after two years of significant suffering and integration back to the present moment, is one of interest in the relative social construct that exists. In particular, exploration of consciousness within everyday life as opposed to bathing in the absolute. As I have mentioned, the protocol is a low dose trip on weekly basis, which can be adjusted as necessary, to promote a small sustainable increase in baseline consciousness; no reference has been made to microdosing. The aim is to explore my current career path, and become more open minded in other avenues of careers which are available. I respect that many forum users are going through the experience that I have had, and the integration process that follows, but after one has undertaken that journey the need to extend it becomes, for the moment, obsolete. What more is there to experience of the absolute if one has experienced the absolute? For those have experienced the absolute and have returned to the day to day experience of life, I would appreciate your insights.