Keryo Koffa

It seems the deepest insights come from a state of not knowing Yet all one's problems stem from the lack of awareness which is not knowing An identity unaware of itself creates problems when it lacks self-knowing And yet there apparently is no knowing to be done or an unknowing to become Not-knowing is the freedom that gives space but can not do anything by itself Awareness is greater knowing which contrasts with not knowing There seems to be a space between awareness and not knowing And isn't awareness itself knowing? If you can direct or tune your awareness, you can tune that knowing Maybe there are different layers of knowing or unknowing Maybe not knowing is just a pointer beyond the known

@Antor8188 Math is a conceptual overlay we use to tune our awareness to the structure of physical reality through ratios. That reality on a deeper layer is imagination and the math a further self-reflective layer of abstraction, though it points to the shape of what we see in actuality. Math might be an indispensable part of consciousness, as it describes how forms within it relate and can coexist in this infinite substrate. But it is a limited lens that analyzes spatial structure and quantic relationships. Biology, philosophy and art are other ways to understand the relationships of forms within consciousness, math might very well not be essential after all but another perspectival limitation that points to a far greater discipline of metaphysics.

While we are unaware of how consciousness constructs the world and others, we should tread lightly. Before jumping out the window to fly, try levitating in the room. When we fully encompass our reality and feel each part of it, we can choose to behave any kind of way. But since we become everything, any harm projected can only be directed to and experienced by us. And that creates profound self-understanding, since we are the actor and object of our expression.

Psychedelics, Meditation and Yoga can propel one into states of Oneness, Emptiness, Ego Death. Unfocus one's mind and bring it into the field of infinity from which everything forms. Separations breaks down, constructs are revealed as such, distance dissolves, need is seen as it arises for itself before it becomes entangled. But there's this desire to understand it, to wield it, to nonetheless keep a sliver of separation that lets one experience the process instead of becoming so one with it that any experience ceases. The experiencer is constructed but the experiencer is the experience that constructs itself, on an absolute level experience does exactly what it wants to do, though in the process of wanting, ties itself down to respond to that need. Though even nothingness is an identity that seeks to remain unentangled, the need to perceive infinite possibilities might be a need, desire, conditioning, or just a state of being. Maybe desires are to be navigated like waves, as a journey that arises and ends as waves in the ocean. I am biased to context, to remember, integrate and navigate experiences, not to get lost or stuck in a loop or suffer in ignorance. But the way I navigate this bias may limit new experience, the expanding of consciousness, the awareness of more. I have this idea that when all becomes one, experience, understanding and awareness ceases, yet I want to experience and know the process, how reality forms as it does, how it takes on forms, the infinite intelligence that constructs this infinitely detailed fractal reality, the body, the mind, the senses, all experience.

@theleelajoker My current understanding is that we are individualized expressions of infinity, autonomous entities within it, higher holarchies include the lower, yet retain their own character but they are dynamic and always changing, the infinite sea of possibilities, the infinity of experience is there irregardless of whether we are aware of it or not and we can expand to perceive it, within it, we are constructed as much as we construct ourselves and we are infinitely interconnected with all other entities, we navigate this substrate of which we are a part, tune our sense perception, on another layer are the intelligence that consciously forms our body and reality, manufactures our sense organs and places ourselves into this reality, to navigate it, to experience it, for it not to dissolve back into infinity but expand our experience, we cut ourselves off from our omnipotence to immerse ourselves, to create individuality, to navigate the world through an externally directed ego, but reality flows from within, corresponds to deeper aspects of ourselves, we are in an experience in which others exist, if we imposed our will, that would limit it so to interact with it in a physical domain, we are limited, but we can also create our own reality independently, though becoming a tyrant there means that we are essentially terrorizing ourselves since we have to become, embody and experience those we terrorize as well, since everything is as, our identity scales within and outside, there is a vast cooperation of consciousness going on within all planes of reality, our world as we know it has chosen to disconnected itself from this awareness, each individual constructs the world inside it and navigates its possibilities, diverging timelines and navigating the infinite bed of possibilities, its a vast process but that's what you get when you inquire into how consciousness would act without limits, if you were the creator and created, how you would structure reality if everything was you and nonetheless you desired to explore this creativity through individuality.

@Leo Gura @Quader @Ishanga Let me break it down: I see duality as distinction. The intellect creates dualities based on perception, meaning perception itself is inherently dual, as it informs and emerges the dualities of the intellect. Love is being channeled between forms or dualities like self and other. But if those dualities dissolved, there would be no room for love, nothing to channel it and nothing to channel it towards and between. But the dissolution of all form would lead to a Unity. But I don't see how Love would have any space in that Unity, since I see love as the attraction between forms. So I don't see how God is Love. In relation to existence yes, but on its own I see no space for love. Love would be a pointer towards God, but when all form and duality collapses into the formless, I don't see space for God to have any properties at all, only in relation to existence would God have traits like intelligence or love but I don't see how it would be an inherent trait on its own when we collapse all else into an absolute formless Unity. Unless Unity is not the merging into formless but a recognition of interconnectedness. So in order for love to exist, there needs to be polarity, but that seems like a reinforcement of separation and that seems like the opposite of the merging that love points towards. Maybe the reconciliation is that I have a faulty understanding of God, Love and (Non-)Duality. I wonder if there can even be such a thing as a Non-Dual experience without the contrasting duality that lets one perceive it as a distinct form to be aware of. There might be the reality that gives rise to dualistic concepts and understanding, but isn't that still a perceptual duality if it is at all distinguishable as a unique thing? Maybe non-duality is simply seeing what is without lenses or being aware of the lenses being constructed. Maybe God isn't formless, but transcend form and formless where all exists simultaneously. Maybe love is not channeled between portions of the self but an inherent property of their existence. I'm getting kinda confused, but its important for me to inquire into this and reconcile that confusion. TLDR; Doesn't love require separation which feels contradictory as it polarizes unity in duality and unity is symbolized as the most loving state, and how can one be aware of non-duality when non-duality is formless, doesn't existence and awareness require duality?

When I finally learn how to enter astral realms or gain psychic powers, I will throw a huge party and teleport all of you there

I know that feeling, it is the fear of dissolving into nothing, the fear of the unknown that dissipates as you face it until it becomes a part of you and now you start missing it, that expanded self that is innately tuned to being direct, authentic and limitless. It's kinda insane, I tuned into what I associated with Christ and Buddha Consciousness too, when I didn't even intend to. Buddha consciousness to me felt like seeing through the source of all fear and distraction to enter a state of tranquility and nothingness. Christ consciousness felt like confessing my authentic feelings, transcending all desires and stories and wanting to save the world, tough I didn't know how exactly lol Makes me feel like a fool every time, it's hard to bear when you realize how stupid and obvious your own distractions are. That every excuse you make, any knowledge you want to gain, is to create an artificial separation and collapse it while being aware of the vanity of the endeavor, since all was available before even doing so. I feel like this world is a training ground and we won't be content until we integrate those experiences into our base state. Beyond that, there are endless experiences that we lose ourselves in, many from the lower chakras and I think we intuitively know that there is at least a part of us that wants to remain, to continue the experience, to get the most out of it, that we are too young for Mahasamadhi and we'd miss experiences if we just transcended to a higher realm, that this type of existence does have its own perks, that there's something that made us come here, that our current resistance is missing parts of the picture, that perhaps the resistance to being here itself might be a problem we want to resolve, or that this type of existence teaches us lessons by us not being able to manipulate the experience directly but only from within the limitation, humbling us in the process. And that on the grand scale of time, we'll leave this place eventually and want to make the most out of it while we still have an ego that benefits from the experience due to its unresolved sense of separation and the return from psychedelic shortcuts. 1. It's a good reflection, sometimes your identity changes, sometimes you revert back, sometimes you progress and find your writing too cringe, or try to modify it to serve the ego. It's nice to have a closer look from during the trip or shortly after before "conscience" kicks in and we face feelings akin to shame from having been as unhampered as we were. 2. Sometimes two steps forward mean one step back, for me personally I often feel that way, but when I look at recordings of the trip and how I used to be before it, I realize massive changes that have simply become the new present, but there's massive difference in the release of trauma and gaining new context and experience that manifests itself less to in the what but in the how 4. You can and should combine both, psychedelics expand your mind but you need to choose the direction and actively take steps to integrate, it also helps to realize what prevents you from doing that in the base state, and the base state itself can be massively leveraged, psychedelics are but a shortcut after all, still a massive one that might mean lifetimes without 5. There is truth for its own sake but there is also love, your own form of love, the self you are, the way you express yourself, that which you feel attracted to, experiences you appreciate, and you can add truth to that to find the authenticity within your experience and expand in the process 7. He commented on mine, I was ecstatic, but that made me aware of how much value I put outside of myself and made me question why I needed external reasons to allow myself the joy, whether I could be like that all the time like Sadhguru or whether it is a state with its own upsides and downsides 8. That's fine, strive to understand more while being attached to less, to contextualize reality in a way that makes sense while being less reliant on any one perspective but instead more in tune, a more expansive ego is better than a narrow one, more awareness is good, as long as it isn't limiting you but any experience itself is growth I believe to have gotten glimpses of that multiple times, I am progressing towards it. It's like detaching yourself from knowledge and identity and letting cosmic intelligence flow through with new life energy changing the perception of reality and life in the process, to modify or rewire oneself top-down, its like externalizing the self to work on it, its like separating everything one believed oneself to be and seeing that one isn't, that one is always morphing, changing. But that's my experience and I cannot be certain if it is what your pointing towards, I am interested in hearing from you.

@Princess Arabia How is any form of this transient energy any less real or more illusory than another? I see how all is made of the same energy, but can this not be reversed so that the formless is illusory and always returns to form? There may yet be a context that encompasses both and describes their flow and relation, I don't think its as passive a process as you describe it.

@Javfly33 This is tough, anything one could desire is already past, any understanding in experience only fading further into it. Does awareness of the past limit freedom? How absolute is this disidentification, how can there be an experience without retaining understanding to contextualize it? Unless I'm taking it too far into the mindless territory, maybe that itself is another identification and the point is simply not to be tied down, but how does one act, make decision and exist in this state? I can see that every moment, one can use this cosmic intelligence to reinform the current position, maybe making plans is possible but always subject to change, yet any future becomes past, maybe its not not to hold any ideas, but to do so lightly, always willing to change them with new insight, to be dynamic, malleable, unattached to any one view or thing.

Do you think that because you are aware of how you render and project others out of raw sensations, you know them inside out? That's no different from Science dissecting a frog looking for what makes it alive. Consciousness can expand to encompass others and can dissolve dualities that create distinctions, it doesn't mean there aren't other selves, in fact infinity contains infinite gradations and permutations of consciousness even if you're unaware of them. There is no reason why Infinity would limit itself to a single experience, even if you can become conscious of your own self-construction and create a fully malleable self-aware bubble of autonomy. You create your own reality but in another way, you tune yourself into a pre-existent field of actuality that exists inside infinite consciousness. There's no reason to assume you're the only consciousness in existence and using psychedelics to transcend all dualities and become nothing/infinite does not negate the existence of the relative world, nor the existence of other simultaneous bubbles of awareness equal to your own. There are many holarchies of consciousness, they're both independent and interconnected, each navigating the infinite field of possibilities. As is our experience, we are made of cells, each part expressing impulses, sensations, desires and yet we are ourselves as well, both the emergent whole and the parts exist independently as themselves but are connected in the motion of consciousness. As is the world, cosmos, others, all made of consciousness and in the process of creation and existence experienced by the consciousness that constructs them and the consciousness that tunes its perception to perceive them and the consciousness that uses the interconnected fabric of reality to pick up their energy and create a vivid impression inside itself. Much exists of which we are unaware, to the complexity we experience ourselves and infinitely beyond, the universe is boundless, no borders to limit it even if it is unexperienced by the conscious self unaware of it, the part that limits its perception and believes to be all there is. Even the highest consciousness is in flux, always changing. You tune your awareness to perceive others out of this infinite field of potentiality, you also create them in your experience in the process, but the substrate exists independently in infinity.

@Princess Arabia If there is no illusion, then what is the comment pointing towards? What is the nature of this "energy" that does everything by itself? If it falls away, where did it fall away from? I get the "burn the bridges" is necessary to tune into higher awareness, but it also seems to create a blindspot.

To expand upon it. How do you see reality constructed? Is it a dynamic illusory assembly of surroundings in periphery, similar to how video games recalculate and render on the go? Or does it have a coherent existence that the current awareness processes and tunes in and out of that exists independently with other awareness bubbles equal in substance to the current that are simply unobserved from the current vantage point but rendered and experienced simultaneously outside of the current experience by other portions of a greater self/god that can be united on a deeper more inclusive layer of consciousness and have detail and experience similar to your own? It's the difference between reality only existing as it is continuously experienced versus tuning into a greater substrate and limiting ones experience forming a bubble of awareness on a relative level that dissolves in the absolute?

@Princess Arabia True, one could say we start enlightened but unaware, because it is a constant, we do not pick up a difference and differences are how learn about reality, we enter dualities in ignorance and dissolve them in awareness, this is due to conditioning, we separate ourselves from enlightenment through a lack of awareness and assumption of dualities, to return to enlightenment, we simply need to realize and dissolve the illusion that makes us chase it.

@Ramu making sense of the feedback loops and removing conditioning is a process, give them time...

if it's infinite, isn't there infinite room for it alongside everything else? or is it the illusory notion of there being some realm outside consciousness you're tackling? since it can be fully encompassed inside consciousness instead of believing it exists outside...

@A Fellow Lighter I will be talking about the immediately unfolding universe as well as the mental construction that maps that higher layer of actuality in the following: I agree there is no need for any reality beyond the POV construction. However, I also think that the indiscriminate construction inside infinite consciousness does yield awareness outside our own, though it is an assumption and I have to be precise with my wording here. The absolute scale is all encompassing, but within it are holarchies that exist both in relation to each other and independently as well. My POV and your POV are such holarchies inside the infinite that on a higher level are unseparated, but I think on a lower simultaneously conscious layer, those do actually coexist, even though the only way to prove that would be for them to merge. And I think the consistency of our world is a lower holarchy substrate that our POVs construct around, that is to say, the infinite constructs worlds and selves through POVs. But immense intelligence is required to create a self, a world and such a realistic and consistent POV and I think the cosmic intelligence that creates it becomes each and every part of the infinite fractal creation in the process, experiencing multiple POVs simultaneously. The idea of other places is a potential that fades in and out of our POV awareness, but it nonetheless exists as that actualizable potential and what I'm hinting at is the idea that our current POV may not be the only thing occupying all of consciousness, as much as it is an absolute self-contained holon in itself that becomes the things it explores and can only ever access them within itself by tuning into other frequencies that exist on other currently unaware holarchies within the greater substrate of consciousness, really any imaginable experience. Solipsism is the idea that the current experience as it is, is the only one in existence, and while I agree that on the highest layer everything is one, I also think that our awareness as we experience it occurs simultaneously in others irregardless of us witnessing it, on a higher layer in infinite self-contained POVs that can merge with others and expand in the process. You can also use imagination and ultimately everything is imagination, but I think there is more to the process than random daydreaming to create our highly complex reality and the minds of self and others, though all we know of them and the way we construct them is contained within us and on a higher level they are literally interconnected into one. Now you might be asking why all the theorizing, it's because I'm interested in the nature of consciousness and think that Solipsism is true but incomplete, like any stage of spiral dynamics being a natural evolution of the last. Not to say that reality isn't purely arbitrary construction, which it may very well be, but it may also be more, which in truth is ultimately building on the same groundlessness but in multiple layers and holarchies, which I am interested in exploring, to see how reality is constructed, mental concepts are easy to see through, but I want to become aware of the process the constructs the senses and perception of physicality and grounds me in this dimension.

@LSD-Rumi If I look back at recordings from past trips, I seemed to be far more in identity, and the experiences were profound due to the releases of limited beliefs they provided. I am much calmer now, more aware of all these aspects of myself. It's quite strange to think about the fact that an important awakening involved the realization of how important "conscious awareness" is, makes me wonder how I was before...

I had two profound hyper-heroic dose trips in the past year. In the second half of them, I was stuck in a time loop. I could move objects, look at the clock, would get fatigued, return to one spot, realize time had reversed, everything was back to the original configuration and then gradually forget and repeat. I'd get deja vu throughout, only had enough awareness that I was in a loop, but not how to change or end it and would eventually realize that I keep repeating it at the very end becoming restless and then forgetting and starting anew. It made me really paranoid, that I need to change something, or it will keep repeating forever but maybe I thought of that before and it is part of the loop, maybe any action I take is already part of it. My final decision was to accept it and make myself comfortable with waiting it out, and eventually I returned to normal. But the idea still rings, what do you think, what would you do?

@integral Back then, I was holding onto existence, it felt like if I blanked out, I may not return or be the same, I also wanted to remember the experience and was highly identified with cognitive understanding. I tried to keep at least rudimentary concepts in tact, like that of passing time or the notion that I'm having an unusual experience but am fine irregardless. Because when all sense of context and identity leaves, I wasn't sure how I would react, if I would get myself into trouble or hurt myself. It is exactly those experiences that led me to learn that I can integrate understanding from the cognitive layer into a more existential ever present awareness, so that my base state irregardless of experience reacts in a calm, explorative manner. That even if I were to lose all sense of context and identity, I would nonetheless feel in tune with a deeper awareness, a being independent of context. I learn to shift my ideas and identity to a vaster substrate, a more intuitive way of knowing. And now I wonder if I wound up back in that experience, would my developments skip it entirely, was it a symbolization of that which I am to let go of, would I be able to figure out what that is, would I stand the trial, could I from this vastly disconnected state of being explore reality in a profound fashion, there is a little fear of entering that state again, though I am more prepared now, but I still somewhat fear to lose my sense of self, the profound shift of context, I can deal with gradual change, with voluntary realization and letting go of limitations, but the levels of immediate change were so great, that it felt like I may as well dissipate into thin air, put another person in that place and pretend that's me, it's quite something.

@A Fellow Lighter If I interpret correctly, the discovery was the deconstruction of the belief in an objective observer, the illusion of identification with a continuously arising and changing phenomenon akin to everything else, a form within the infinite substrate of formlessness. I wonder, what is your view on the nature of the self, others, the world and solipsism? Is the substrate of consciousness forming bubbles of individual awareness? If so, how are they related? Did you get insights about the nature and structure of reality and that which we perceive as forces of nature?

My few experiences go into that but its more discomfort than pain although the common ground is suffering. If psychedelics expand awareness and dissociatives dissolve desires, then my experiences with cannabis comparatively bring out tons of childhood experiences, uncomfortable sensations, states of mind where all I wanted was to escape, discomfort, unease, vertigo I associate to past events. Dealing with injuries, inability to sleep, making a fool of myself, being confused, being stuck in life, wanting to move. But since its all part of me, integrating and transforming it grows me. Still, what way of exploring pain were you pointing to?

It's an Aha! moment, where you realize something that seems obvious in hindsight but nonetheless profound. It's like grasping a new concept, that which is pointed to, counting to infinity vs realizing where that leads. It's making sense of yourself, others and the world through a new substrate that connects them all.

@Rafael Thundercat On the second trip I later experienced an interplay of duality and unity, I guess it makes sense, we explore reality in all its dualities and then dissolve them into non-duality in endless permutations. Although, we do end up bored and then strive for new types of experiences, but I guess the experience was kind of hinting to that, or the stick ego, or the fear of going outside of oneself and making new experiences, or getting lost, or something like that

@What Am I That sounds funny and scary, like being unable to stop laughing even when it starts hurting. That must have been quite the experience, especially since it was a group experience, that must have doubled the impact. Just woah. Mega doses seem to not only deconstruct reality but also the memory necessary to make sense of a moment to moment experience. The tendency is to deconstruct everything and tune out of sensory awareness. It might lack bandwidth to make sense of the context, leading to singular specific actions, a loop might be the simplest form of understanding unable to go beyond itself.