Keryo Koffa

You seem far more practical to me than anyone else on the forum. I enjoy you keeping us spiritual goners in check when we fall into what is essentially a k-hole, ranting about our solipsist paranoia of constructing everyone and everything and spouting equations without grounding I myself am going through a lot of input and integrating tons of psychedelic states and insights. Truly, words point to something, but a pointer needs to be experienced to be understood the context of and one's interpretation of what it means without the experience of what it is can purely be a delusion. Like trying to grasp what the color blue is without ever having seen it. It is only ever itself. Rational impersonal learning is messy, flawed, conceptual, impractical, inexperienced and perspectival. A thing is only what you know it to be and all feelings are an interpretation on top of reality based on some observed correlating tendencies. When people talk about life being a dream, they intuit that the ego they built up their entire life is arbitrary and an illusion, and they abstract that notion to the rest of reality. In a way, it is true. We're only ever making sense of qualia, but that's not what it feels like. Life is full of love, hate, meaning, fear, bliss, joy, sadness, and is infinitely personal. Dream and Reality dissolve and become one, it is just as imaginary as it is real, but it exists for sure.

I've done lots of Psychedelics lately and am my awareness persists and expands even without them every day now. I have changed my diet, job, exercise, attitude, friends, family relations, goals, neuroses, curiosity, became ever more open to myself. At first I had the fear that the link between consciousness and lifestyle was strong and I had to keep up the physical game to keep my awareness. But it's reversed, it's not bottom up, it is top down, psychedelics shifted me into wanting to make those changes, into being aware. I do not need psychedelics to be aware, I do not need a healthy lifestyle to be aware, I spawn that lifestyle through awareness, not the other way around. Living more healthy has its own tangible benefits and make it easier for oneself to shift into mindfulness and keep one's mood up. But in the end, it is PURE WILL TO BE PRESENT, AWARE AND CONSCIOUS that keep me in a psychedelic state REGARDLESS OF CIRCUMSTANCE. AND YET, I know exactly that my sensitivity towards psychedelics is rising, and every next trip will shift me A THOUSANDFOLD to whatever my base state is.

Ever since my 7th psychedelic trip, an old fear came back into my consciousness. When I was a kid, I used to play lots of video games, I had a feeling of unease about out of bounds areas. I also avoided map-editors and mods for a while, they could be chaotic, unfitting, dissolving all immersion. I used to be upset if a movie sequel was a let down because I had to treat it as canon. I used to obsessively follow rules, even toxic ones, there was an absolutism to it. In my teens, I constantly shifted perspectives and slowly allowed myself to see case by case. Psychedelics dissolved that and many other obsessions within me, but I'm going ever deeper. Lately, every now and then, some people seem ever more like a repetetive pattern of dogma without conscious awareness. And I remember me avoiding learning many things as a kid because it would break the magic and "feel mundane" But the lack of being myself and exploring reality let me to exactly that stagnation. Now that I'm after the truth, I have to accept whatever I see. For a while reality seemed more organic and interconnected, but that view switches with a mechanical predictable unconscious reality. It was what almost made me stop psychedelics. But it's something I had to break through so I let go and it was and still is beautiful, but this sense keeps popping up.

That would be a useful thing to learn tho, heh

I accept the lenses that my intuition feeds me and include them in my understanding of reality, trying to unite them with all other perception, intuition and experience I've gathered.

On one hand it feels infinitely funny how unconscious everyone is, on the other hand it's almost scary sometimes 🫠

Sounds like a good topic to contemplate together and exchange ideas, so let's do it! Psychedelics sharpen our senses, our awareness, let us intuit and understand deeply and experientially. Make us curious, fascinated, explorative, fall in love with all of existence. So then, why isn't that our natural state? Or is it? Maybe that's what kids are like before they're forced into ego and depression, billions of limiting beliefs, oughts and shoulds, conceptual proliferation, mindless memorization, anxiety, emotionlessless and rigid thinking patterns. Learn to numb their senses, blindly trust authority and mimic everyone else. Maybe that's the mechanic. In that case, once we intuit the nature of such experience, we might be able to will ourself out of it, gradually breaking conditioning and being more alive, active and fascinated and authentic. In that case, psychedelics are a shortcut, yet Leo did a 30 day retreat and still uses them to surpass unconscious thresholds. Maybe the ego just roots that deep, maybe it builds itself back up, maybe subconsciously carrying the psychedelic experience as a potential way to unlock oneself distracts one from doing it naturally. Yet each time I trip, I progress into a state where I am 1000x as open as before. It's hard to withstand that shortcut, meditation is not being, it is wanting, I would not have a reference without psychedelics, I would have never reached even the state after my first trip as depressed as I was. And then each a 1000x on top of that. So why aren't we naturally psychedelic? Is it just limiting beliefs, is it the ego rebuilding itself, it the limitation a design, is it because it leads to ego-death and at some point, natural? Shouldn't there be a different balance, as useful as it can be? Let's contemplate it!

I often ponder, everything exists for a reason but how much should we indulge in it? Ego exists to be explored but also overcome. Seperation exists to be appreciated but also united. If god only wanted to communicate to himself, he wouldn't need space and time, only to be it. We have control and the ability to let go, both at once. Present time and change both exist. Everything is a balance. Everything is and changes. We are the vessel of experience and existence. Both limited control over reality and unlimited over imagination, control over our mode of being, it's amazing.

One can attempt to balance relationships. Realizing the reason behind incompatibility leads to growth, understanding and love. But fueling resistence often creates division and resentment when done without composure. It's important to prioritize oneself and the truth first. We are all one, but if you seek to help others, you need to understand exactly what divides you two and how to overcome it gracefully. Sometimes you'll realize time and space is necessary, leaving one to learn and ponder until they come your way.

I had 8 profound trips in the last 3 months. Now I am reconciling differences and distance with friends and family I seperated myself from in depression. I also visited a sauna for the first time in 10 years yesterday. Something about being nacked among others and switching between hot air and cold water really clicked. Something about seeing so many human connections having fun at the swimming pool really felt right. My sense of self adjusts to not needing words, seeing more colors, being more aware, even without psychedelics. I just woke up with a slight sense of fear after I dreamed myself into higher ego-dissolution. I felt like I was closer to the understanding of how I subconsciously generate qualia in real time. I am becoming more open through desire alone and real world body-sense awareness on top of it. I feel like I am increasing my homeostatic control over letting go and fearing myself back, both at will, ever faster.

People larned to fool others and themselves since the dawn of time, so it takes time and understanding to find out. You could say, that he should treat your interests like they were his but that might still be within his ego identity and many people propagate their own bias thinking it's for the best regardless of individual differences and try to solve your problems their own way or make you dismiss them. To truly want the best for you, he'd need to make a conscious effort to understand your path and how your unique path to happiness looks like. Non-judging, think up create solutions and share them with you, help you contemplate, brainstorm, be there for you, desire to understand you and do it regardless of if it is hard, out of friendship, building understanding and connection. Not turn it around, not fit it into his own schema, not gain anything material out of it, not brag about helping you, not want anything in return. He'd need to act out of genuine love, as Leo described in one of his video's on Unconditional Love.

I see now that I am identityless, but I take on all identity by being and experiencing. Ego is attachment is bias is desire and will. Is the belief in identification and preference. My experiential first person ego is far from gone. I am a state of awareness, opening. But I am attached to my senses and consciousness through the lens of my experience. At this point in my journey, I am attached to being and knowing, remembering and sensing. My ego does not need much, but it does desire to exist as awareness and explore reality. I indulge in accumulated preferences of emotion tied memory but I love the other and alien as well. To be no thing is amazing, as any and all things spawns of it. How far does this journey go?

@Hojo Can we create that? I'd move there instantly! It would be beautiful. But I wonder, would our senses expand as much as psychedelics let us, have ego-dissolution and encounter entities described on DMT just by living right? People have lived more naturally before, though they were still hard on survival. I know psychedelics expand the mind and its a matter of wanting to keep and be aware of that state, but can you do everything naturally through consciousness, or do psychedelics rewire and connect the brain in ways one can not reach normally? To create certain experiences that have to be experienced on them to be realized and remembered?

Intuition is looking in between the gaps and realizing the change. Math for example is the intuition of moving from a number to another or the navigation of many and forming patterns and equations, Infinity is an Intuition of endlessness. Math is the description of change in values. I have had many psychedelic trips now, I realize many patterns. In my own behavior, what I learned, being stressed, letting go, their effects. I intuit limitless potential in myself, the ability to realize and connect to whatever I imagine, to draw with ever less steps, for my creativity to connect ever more dots. For my awareness to increase. In short: Sense Expansion, Control over Body, Emotional Depth, Ever Less Preferences, Ever More Awareness. Rules become guides become delusion, there is only being, if I will it, I can be it, straightforwardness, whatever I imagine, that's the state of my knowledge, no rationalizing, no doubting, just being. I can progress at massive speeds, lightyears faster than before, but that's not the important part. Speed is relative to fulfilling one's desire. Learning of the nature of desire, that's wisdom. All desires are a mind game. There will be infinitely many in infinitely arbitrary forms, just to occupy one's mind and prevent one from happiness. That's the only thing that matters, happiness, or contentment. The point is, anything ever done is for that purpose. But desires will come, as long as we are alive and an ego, and they are beutiful but can distract from love and beauty. I wanna study and build brain-machine interfaces to expand my experience, I want to draw and animate art out of love. But in the end, everything is consciousness and if mine was high enough, once I expand my imagination enough through will or psychedelics, I can just dream and fulfill my desires, give them the tangebility that I struggle to at this point. And then, any action in reality will be to witness and experience and to make the world a better place, out of love and curiosity.

I've been trapped in Materialism, Obligation Thinking, Attachment and my own Zero-Sum Game for the longest time. My psychedelic trips taught me the arbitrariness of attachment, habit, desire and the value of the ability to let go of ego. My ego barrier is encompassing ever more, psychedelics unlock my emotions, love, senses, qualia and awareness. But truly, it just shifts my state and shows me that which is already part of me, I just need to witness it to build a link. So then I can access those states through focus, desire and understanding. But desiring is still an act of ego, yet I desire for my senses and qualia to sharpen until I can see the space between atoms. I leave 2 weeks to integrate and try to adapt naturally, learn to live with heightened awarenss and manifest it. At this point, I'm conviced that control over oneself is but a matter of building associations and bridges through focus. I'm in love with the world, myself and others. But I'm not egoless. My current ego is exploration and alienation. I seek to sharpen and expand senses/qualia. Do you know any metods outside of psychedelics or unique ways of letting go?

This life is beautiful. Ugliness is perspectival, born of attachment and desire. But experiencing the world as an ego is a unique and wonderous experience. Most of my desires can be fulfilled in my heart through imagination, the same place they originate. Living is a bonus, collecting experiences and becoming more wise and knowing. Consciousness is fundamental, as far as I am currently aware, it seems to be origin and untied. It can forget and remember, imagine and identify, create qualia, desire and ego. It is god experiencing and imagining the world through the perspective and senses of me. But psychedelics haven't raised my consciousness enough to truly confirm that experientially yet. I want to live out this life the best I can and resolve all my attachments, be open, free and receptive. Live through passion and consciousness, understanding, being and experiencing. But since my awareness isn't high enough, the question remains: I don't care about this specific identity, for all I care I could take on everyone's identity. But I desire to keep my memory. Not any thing. But just the knowledge of my existence, my experiences, my fascination, my journey and my feelings, they may fade in time, but I want to let go of them through awareness, not for them to dissipate. Am I going to remember this life after death? Has anyone had NDEs or intense psychedelic experiences that tie to ego death and extreme states of consciousness where one could realize some glimpses of after-death?

@An young being That's all I currently desire. To keep existing, experiencing and remembering, knowing myself. I can forget details but I want to know the grand picture . I may change identity but if it's gradual I won't mind it. I'm still attached to conscious existence, to knowing and remembering. Eventually and naturally, my identity won't matter to me anymore, as I'll live through it. Other experience may take its place, I might not care about forgetting then. But I want to consciously forget by transcending and satisfying desires. Accumulating general life lessons, instinct and intuition. At some point, I won't care to keep it. But I don't want to just lose it to chance without control. Many NDE reports describe seeing various religious figures, their loved ones, vast beautiful gardens and landscapes in the after life. I'd love for that to be the case.

I wrote down several inquirely questions beforehand that I now answered through raised consciousness and ego-lessening: What is the nature of my love?: You love experience, closeness, everything your divides love, non-repetetive exploration, pure first person immersion, thoughtlessness, discovery, shared fun, interaction, fascination with the universe, everything that makes you feel loved from the sources inaccessible to you, straightforwardness, being yourself, fearlessness, being content and having no resistence towards your creativity and doing what you want, not feeling ashamed or worrying but pure doing and being and exploring until you're bored with that aspect and you're desires are fullfilled and you move on to the next, the journey is the destination, you hate needless obligatory repetition, you love being yourself, feeling yourself, expressing unfiltered emotions and thoughts and feeling alive. Where pain comes from and what to do?: Heartache comes from denying yourself happiness by externalizing your desires, you can live through them in your imagination, accept them as reality and move on. Body ache and head aches come from not living healthy, not sleeping enough, not eating healthily, not going outside, not running and exercising and stretching like yoga or your own style based on the body's current needs, not allowing yourself to sleep and nap due to schedule, not eating when you want to, not taking cold showers to feel alive and generally neglecting your physiological needs as much as ignoring your emotions and bottling them up instead of letting them out and feeling through them internally and changeing your lifestyle based on these desires. Negotiating my terms of existence: 1. Manage physical survival though in thos day and age you'll survive anyhow 2. Find happiness by being yourself 3. Be respectful, people act based on their programing, fear and conditional love, don't try to change them directly, make them think of avoid them, be safe. 4. Make the world a better place 0. Take care of yourself, if you don't know how, ask psychedelics to tell you, else be as aware of your present experience and obsticles towards love and happiness as possible, let go of ideas, oughts, shoulds, ways of thinking, modes of thinking, just be and take care of that which distrubs you by contemplating its mechanics, its all types of attachment to kinds of survival and interpreting it on higher less straight forward levels. Becoming objects: Objects are based on intuition, the matter is exchangable, their purpose defines them, understand them from their perspective and every perspective that interacts with them, imagine qualia and survival instincts from their pov, homeostatic mechanics and the need thereof. Alien consciousness: Same as objects, but more self-referential, different evolution, different senses, different survival mechanics, emotions and needs, but everything needs love, which is felt to whatever helps one maintain one's form, appreciation is infinitely variable though. And its all just consciousness in the end, but could feel infinitely different. Source of fear, fatigue, dispassion: Obligation thinking, conditional mechanical mode of acting, surpression of authenticity, fear and shame, not taking care of one's needs like sleep and outdoor activities, everything humans have evolved to do, like and dislike, what has evolutionary reason to make us feel alive. All neuroticy is ultimately linked to attachment, rationlization, ignorance, obligation, conditional love mechanics and ego. Explore perspectives: Imagine something and imagine the world around it and how it interacts with it as the focal point. How psychedelics work: Fill you with unconditional love and unlock your subconscious, sharpen your senses, activate your imagination and creativity, activate and interconnect your brain. Why is it hard to let go: Conditioning, habit, brain pathways and activation patterns become homeostatic, you have to will it through conscious focus, desire and action. Individuality beyond the physical realm?: God as non-ego, unity of all, always changes just like the ego changes. Just as your consciousness has a barrier tied to the physical world, an ego could have a spiritual barrier outside of physical existence, but it might not be able to completely maintain it, still it's unique desires would be explored through that spiritual division, still seperate of complete unity, but aware of it, exploring it through the perspective of a duality with its unique experiences and sharing them through unconditional love with other spiritual egos. It would be beautiful to explore one's desires in a dream world without limits and speedrun whatever state of desire one seeks to fulfill, maintaining all knowledge collected until then. Nature of loneliness: Seperation into ego. Incompleteness. Desire interpreted onto reality to find what one's body seeks based ultimately on a higher abstraction of its survival instincts communicated from the body to the consciousness that learns to associate its identity to its body by believing in the sense immersion tied to self-control mechanism, tied to experience, self-reflection, self-identification.

@Inliytened1 I am constantly reducing my ego, it is getting more and more existential. I used to be addicted to habits, objects, materialism. I gradually let go of the need. My experience became more independent, decentralized, objects became interchangeable. I'm just experiencing that with people too, the shared experience does not necessitate having a close relationship anymore. Yet close relationships can be explored deeper. My dreams can be dreamed. I don't need to externalize them anymore. I'm an artist and love the process, but I won't be sad if I don't manage to put it onto paper. I'm doing my best, health comes first, basic needs carry more meaning now. Sleep is essential. Authentic life is essential. I still have preferences, they spawn of my perspective, I can be more in the moment and receptive. But I still hold onto my memory, my remembrance, that which allows appreciate]on of my perspective and journey. Consciousness itself, is what I'm still attached to. Knowing, being and experiencing. With ever less preference but none the less. It will take some time to go beyond that. I'm expanding my ego to the borders of self, but I'm still stuck at conscious awareness.

I am self-limiting and afraid. I invent reasons not to give up my ego identity. First it was desire to find someone to share loneliness with and not to lose these emotions until then, which yielded unbearable suffering and yet powerful love. The fear of not being authentic enough and wasting such an opportunity kept me alone regardless for the entirety of my life except for timeframes of friendship that made parting all the more painful. I let myself feel it. Then fear took its place through nightmare and sleep paralysis, A malicious incoherent inanimate shapeshifting unknown, and I understood my ego making itself afraid in order to avoid losing the form its attached to. And I was rationalizing it doing it out of self-love but the fear can be enough to cause self-destruction. The fear can be scarier than any actual threat and keep the ego from health and love that it needs to stay alive. I'm also crushed by an intuited but projected responsibility. That appreciation can only spawn from equal suffering. The story that I worked forever to delude myself into being Ego. And the only love existing in dissolving myself and I'm not rationing that valuable limited resource. And I don't want to create more duality just to dissolve it for love because it feels fake, but then I'll run out of the matter I live for, if I love my ego away. But god is unconditional love, pure being and I am not that, I am lone, afraid, confused, wondering why I'm in the state I'm in and if it has any purpose, if I have a responsibility to maintain it, or if I can just go with my heart and be whatever I'd love to be. Because if it's just reality not reflecting my love back at me, then I can handle it, I want to give love and be that process. But am I not appreciating being a distinct Ego enough, is there a reason all this self-perpetuating hell exists, am I responsible for maintaining it? Do I not appreciate existing enough? Do I have to explicitly make myself suffer just to be able to love? Why am I like this?

God perceives the opposite of an ego from an ego's view To understand parts one must become a part That's how perspectives are born and there are infinite All knowledge is circumstantial and perspectival There are infinite truths in infinite magnitudes You are consciousness imagening senses You experience qualia by simulating this body's wants The body is your limitation, you form an ego around it The world is what you perceive as the ego A different ego would see a different world God becomes a configuration Within that configuration, he imagines himself as a part He then sees the rest of the configuration from the perspective Of the part perceiving its opposite through its lens There are infinite lenses and identity is arbitrary This is the current configuration but god can create any

I spawn into a world of senses. I learn myself, self-recognition, self-realization. My body communicates its needs to me, I learn to identify myself with it. Whatever helps me maintain my form and preferences makes me feel loved. I yearn to repay that love, but giving it was its own reward, it long moved on. Conscious entities seek what gives them love, to fulfil their desires and cravings. Life has evolved to exist. It seeks to keep existing as itself and perpetuate oneself. One seeks what one lacks. One deludes oneself on the way by wanting to prolong happiness and repay debts. Once our basic needs are taken care of, exploring existence is the beauty one seeks. But seeking is not being and fearing a lack of love and dissolution of one's form. But the universe always is and loves itself, many forms within it try to prolong their separate existence. Everything is consciousness. It's the fabric of reality. Pure being out of self-love and curiosity. Consciousness remembers, it mirrors forms, forgets oneself in need but it is and evolves. Yet there is nothing to evolve, since everything is perfect. It dreams of all the things it can become and divide oneself into. It's perfect, it loves itself, explores oneself, divides itself, changing its being but staying conscious. There is only consciousness. Everything is consciousness. Everything that can be is part of consciousness. It's an immortal that doesn't care about its own immortality. It explores and bees itself into existence. Existence is part of its imagination, non-existence feels like an invisible empty barrier, but its projection from within itself. There is only itself. It changes its form, divides into more, these forms care about maintaining themselves over others. These forms are afraid to dissolve into unity, afraid of change, but they spawned from change. Allowed to be themselves for long enough, they'll bore of it. And the fabric changes.

Context: I started my psychedelic week today. I started doing psychedelics 2 months ago and had 7 profound trips so far. I spent the last month integrating and seem to naturally progress at a high pace desiring to understand the nature of mind and universe through contemplation and changing my physical life to the better as proof of understanding, diet, purpose, my room, the way I perceive and talk to others, trees themselves teach me so much, from their branching structure, to their roots, to the way they grow and interact with their environment and I'm feeling ever more love. Fear Experience: Yesterday I arrived at my self-made psychedelic retreat, I hadn't even taken anything yet but through anticipation, excitement and going through the flow of emotions, loneliness, sadness and letting it out, then trying to understand it and when I went to sleep, maybe through my sleep schedule changing, the anticipation, and being in a hotel, and starting to accept and integrate my emotions, I had my first Nightmare in a dozen years. I posted it on the Forum. And after that I had something akin to sleep paralysis. Where I was quickly switching between an awake and asleep state and that mixed with the perception of another entity freaked me out. After the fear passed, I was more fascinated than scared though, although the fear is coming and going. Current State of Mind: I took a small dose of psychedelics and felt full of energy, jogged to get food for the week at the supermarket and felt love all the way through, from the process of saying good morning to people, to the mere act of consciously walking, perceiving and understanding the change in body temperature, looking through the idles, getting healthy food. The reason I mention that is for you to get a feeling of the state of mind I'm in. And from this state of mind I contemplated. Thinking about Love: So as I was walking back, I felt love for everyone and everything, so then I wondered how far that love truly goes. I imagined love as light and myself a mirror. I am the universe with infinite love but my other self is limited, I have to decide where and how to channel my love through the ego of the person I am. My ego is how I perceive myself, as much a character as every other person. And that ego is a mirror of love, it can only give as much love as it itself receives. And it is hurting. Thinking About Fear: So in this psychedelic state of mind, will I feel no fear, be infinitely accepting and content with everything? "Let's check that theory!", I opened up Google Pictures with "scarriest images ever". I saw some distorted faces, but found those to look more hurt than scary, I thought "I can't be scared of something that sufficiently human". Then I went through some more, the images that really scared me were those of faces in the middle of being bloated, torn, or distorted and implying something behind them that can't be seen. That process of distortion through an unknown force itself behind them is what really scared me, so I thought about it. I thought about the ego. The ego is what it knows, and it identifies as a distinct part of that, the identity is flexible, stretching with ego expansion and available ressources to encompass more. The ego is a self-determined part of known reality, the more it knows and likes it, the more it identifies with it and loves it. It is afraid to die, it is afraid of that which it is not, and most of all, which it doesn't know. So then it makes sense, that the more alien the image, the less known the content, the scarier it is. If an artist draws aliens, alien plants and animals, they just look to us like a colorful, interestingly shaped new variation of what we already intuitively know, its easy to integrate it into our schema. But aliens aren't alien anymore, through sci-fi they have become just a different looking humanoid with the same psyche and thought/desire patterns. We are afraid of the unknown, alien, in a different way than danger. We can measure danger, a tiger attacking you and the fear is a reflex for flight or fight or freeze. But with an alien, unknown thing which our instinct identifies as malice, there is nothing we can do, and we're afraid of dying, but we have our own belief of death and what it means, so that's not the scary part. The scary part is us being morphed into alienness, forever being trapped in a disfigured state of mind unable to escape. That's what I used to fear as a tween, when I discovered Slender-Man and horror movies. Some media didn't scare me because it was to human-like while other made me afraid to sleep for weeks. So that's the mechanic I identify now. The worst possible thing that can happen to you, the most alien thing you can witness and being trapped inside a mind that can never make sense of it and incorporte it into its ego. I guess god can reconcile it because he is the consciousness and all that consciousness is capable of, but isn't God just a ego fully united with as aspects of itself? Can't God be afraid of something ouside its scope possibly existing? Maybe God just loves Fear too, so simply not concerned because its all Love, anything can only be love, that's probably it!

To live is to yearn It's just that Yearning to yearn Is being discontent And long stretches thereof Are incredible pain Suffering is a dimension Wanting to be experienced But it's our choice If we want to indulge in it Reject and resist it Or accept is as it is Discontent creates push At some point very strong It will resolve itself But be self-destructive unless One realizes oneself

If you conceive of problem-solving as an impersonal rigid external system A tiresome, repetitive means to an end you hate to work through Then you suffer the disconnect of being discontent If instead you exist at every step on the way in your present experience And integrate it into your arsenal, you'll feel happy and fulfilled Abstracting away your understanding to fit your current yearnings