Chadders

Business development but going into secondary school teaching in design and technology. Specialising in wood work

This is why I like this forum. I have not heard of those practises so will be trying them out tomorrow. Thanks for sharing Any particular style of Pranayama or Qigong for grounding that you would recommend?

@Leo Gura This may have already been asked but will you be adding all your recent episodes to podcast player? I use Apple Podcasts

@Verg0 By spiritual I would see this as the pursuit to 'understand reality' - and why anybody would want to do this can only be for love whether thaqt be in the relative domain or the metaphysical I have found psychedelics to help me understand reality through an elevation and change of consciousness. They're definitely a great tool

His episodes on love are some of his best. What is love I also really enjoyed his episode on conscious politics and the role of government

I have noticed a day after taking LSD (only a small dose) I find I am depressed. Does anyone else experience this and what are people’s thoughts on it? I would not say that my life as it stands is as fulfilling as I would like but without going into the details I am in a transitional phase where I don’t have a lot of options so I feel it heightens that emptiness. When I’m on it though I fucking love it tbh. I don’t need a lot but I find both my connection to the present moment and love simultaneously get better. I feel like myself but my performance in the relative world is enhanced. If I’m usually at Lv6 on LSD I’m like a Lv9 (out of 10). Again this is on a high micro dose

@Nilsi I know yoof. I’m in limbo for another 5 months. I’ve tried but it looks like the universe wants me to stick with it But my life ain’t that sucky. In one way I have a very full life but the level of meaning and purpose that I need from my work is just so much more now. I am not content with my current career. Burned out and fucking bored of it I don’t want LSD to be an escape. I never take psychedelics for that reason. I only do it to enhance myself personally. In many ways it has and others I am not so sure yet

@Vynce Yeh it does seem that way. I said the day after but it was actually a couple of days after my mood tanked. On reflection it is mostly my situation that is not satisfying because my current job is just shite. No challenge and no meaning for me now. I have it very easy. Actually the day after I did DIY in the garden and was fine. The next day I was sat on my laptop thinking wtf is this shit lol I am in limbo and for the next 5 months I don’t know what the universe has in store but it looks like it wants me to stick where I am until teacher training. There’s only so much you can do But it does make me think I need to be more mindful of the post mood dips when I’ve not got the meaning in my job that I need

@HMD best technique is simply keep it out of sight. Same principle that applies to having cookies in a jar at home. It’s just easier to not have cookies there so you do not have to resist the temptation Leave your phone at home and go for a walk/bike ride

@Yimpa yep I mean more recent additions

What do people think about starting a family? I find many are just not in touch with the deeper purpose behind it We’re actually talking about something that is an inherent part of the evolution of the human species. It’s not ‘traditional’ in that dismissive attitude some people have but it’s baked into the fabric of the human species. Family units were a core part of tribal societies it’s not just some conservative mid-century option. We are hardwired to procreate and care for our children unless very dysfunctional Also I would say that what makes a boy a man and a girl a woman is when they are ready to start a family - this is irrespective of whether they actually do or not, the point is they are mature enough to do it properly if they were to. It’s a good test of your own maturity. Do you truly believe you are mature and strong enough to be a grounded, loving and stable father figure or a compassionate, loving and nurturing mother? A big problem is that many people are not mature enough to be parents. This is so obvious with people who can’t fully take on board the responsibility in being a parent I’ve seen posts where people will dismiss the family option and go their own way with travel or whatever. That’s fine but it’s this dismissal and the conception that it is a traditional option that bugs me. Starting a family is a beautiful thing. It’s not a lifestyle but a core part of us it’s just that maturity is the key to it

@Unlimited That’s hard I’d be very hurt by those comments You can’t change their minds on the matter so I would just try as best you can to let it go. They are where they are. You’ve got your life and they’ve got there’s. You’re not responsible for them especially being the child in the dynamic. The onus is on them But try not to judge them for it. I don’t know the dynamics but they have done their best for you I would hope If it helps to break free of the dynamic do it and don’t feel guilty about it. If you feel that it is holding you back in some way take a break from them. Focus on your life and developing yourself and then when you’re less emotional about it go back to them

I would say both on maturity. Hopefully someone would naturally mature with age anyway but you need to be at a base line level of maturity. To be stable psychologically, emotionally and financially is very important. In terms of commitment that’s where you have to want it like with anything in life. You’re not going to be committed to something you never wanted As for staying committed to it your child is your own flesh and blood. You brought them into this world and as a parent you have got their back no matter what. That perspective does require maturity and letting go of your own ego and selfishness Just to add to the maturity thing it is ideal that you are with someone committed to the child as well. It’s very important to have a good father and mother figure. The child can learn from both masculine and feminine energies. If it’s a single parent then the child potentially misses experiencing another universal energy. Boys with single mums as parents have to make up for the lack of masculine energy and vice versa for girls with single dads as parents looking after them. Having both is ultimately the best but leaning to masculine or feminine whether you are a boy or a girl Obvs we can talk all day about how identity is relative but for practically getting by in the world and not being dysfunctional kids need certainly and understanding around their sexual identity. Polarity is a healthy thing but that’s another debate!

You have a lot of self reflection here which is a positive thing and is a sign of being a good parent but as you say you may not quite have all the qualities to be as good a parent as you feel you can be. Very mature response. I’ve only recently at 31 felt that I could be a decent parent - that revelation came through psychedelics full disclosure You are totally right with the quote above. Expecting your child to turn out a certain way is selfish. It’s projecting what you want on the child rather than allowing them to explore what they really want out of life

@eos_nyxia That’s true. Capitalism has rotted society from the inside out because most business marketing practises leach off the ignorant (easy to please) such as children. Social media is atrocious for this. Parents have a job to protect their kids from the utter garbage fed to their children on a daily basis from these addictive mobile games, junk food, social media, mass entertainment etc It’s a war on our attention and our children are the biggest victims

You don’t understand what I mean by that Yes it’s a big deal to start a family

@Basman Only recently I’ve been struck by the divine around starting a family. Has never really been on my mind as something I would Purposefully want to do but after a divine communication on mushrooms it basically told me that I’m ready to start a family now It does make sense because I’ve been working on myself a lot over the last few years and have radically changed as a man in many respects. So for me it’s more that starting a family feels now very purposeful to me. I can see the deep meaning and value behind. I can’t force it to happen it’s up to the universe but I feel more intentional about that

@NewKidOnTheBlock If this is your thinking this should immediately tell you that you are not mature enough to start a family

@Nemra Yes your level of maturity will determine whether you know you are ready to start a family or not regardless of whether you actually do I once knew someone who wanted to have a baby but for all the wrong reasons. She thought that it would make her happy and I could tell that she was seeking some kind of external validation from it. So glad she never did have a baby she was very immature for her age - she’s 41 now

@Schizophonia Starting a family is a serious thing. It’s not something to be taken casually. It’s a huge responsibility but one that is incredibly rewarding

@Sugarcoat I don’t think there is so much expectation now. Not in the west anyway. Liberal values have changed that. As a man I certainly don’t feel any expectation to start a family I’ve just reached a stage in my life where I feel ready to. Where there is expectation it’s definitely coming from lower developmental stages. Starting a family should be for the right reasons not because others expect you to do it so I agree that’s a problem and does exaggerate global population levels and also levels of dysfunction in society This is where it is the conflation with family and spiral dynamics stage blue that bothers me as it’s not dependent on a stage of development. It’s a very beautiful thing at the higher stages - at a higher level it is about conscious evolution. Loving and nurturing your children so that they will leave the world in a better state than what your generation did. It’s a process of undoing the inherited trauma we all live with going back to the dawn of human civilisation. See your children grow and develop into a conscious human being is probably one of the most rewarding things you can possibly do in life - again when it is done from a higher place Make no mistake there is actually a deep spiritual purpose. A divine purpose in having children and starting a family. I know this for sure because I’ve had profound insights on this

@Sugarcoat There’s definitely a stigma to some extent. In the west the stigma is mostly on women who are childless but I don’t feel the same way as a man in the west. In other parts of the world it’s different. Starting a family requires a lot of maturity. It is a divine purpose. It is part of human evolution so ‘starting a family’ shouldn’t be conflated with conservative traditional values. It’s hardwired

@Sugarcoat That’s not the point I’m making. Population size is another issue all together If only the people that were mature enough to start a family did so you can be sure the global population would radically decline

@Rishabh R that’s great. ACT is a good tool for helping to detach and allow emotions to wash over you rather than getting caught up in them When it comes to emotions my deep insight on this with LSD was that you’ll feel whatever the universe wants you to feel. It’s not in your control. If the universe wants you to feel pain you’ll feel pain. Take the onus away from yourself because you can’t control it. It’s like acceptance. Actually acceptance is not in your control. If you accept it the universe has decided you will accept it because if we try to accept something it doesn’t work. It’s this realisation that helps because it takes away the onus on you to try and fix yourself. You’re perfect as you are. The universe wants you to feel this for whatever reason you just can’t connect the dots yet. That’s a true acceptance when you know it’s entirely out of your control The values stuff in ACT is good as well in then pivoting to what matters most and getting on with the business of living All the best yoof

Actually I’d also add that in my experience the introverted lifestyle is too easy. I am too comfortable here. The real challenge is in the extroverted space which entails putting yourself out there. Putting your neck on the line by having accountability and facing judgment, expectation, exposure etc. being at complete ease with that. To be calm in chaos As I reflect on my time in solitude part of me feels it is an escape from the abundance of life. Life is for living. You might as well be dead otherwise Edit: just to flesh out the point I don’t see the point in hibernating away in a cave meditating. There’s so much life to be experienced. To serve the community, impact people romantically and emotionally, start a family, hone a craft or skill. Life is just so abundant and no guru has experienced all that Maybe I just don’t understand because I am not awakened enough but I will say I am a strongly on the introverted scale by default and have through my own insights and perspectives changes on psychedelics seen the limitations here. I have felt that the universe wants me to live life