Chadders

I am starting to lean into pick up more recently. General chatting and flirting with women in the day time. Mostly in coffee houses. I am new to pick up just dabbling in it It’s clear to me that if you are detached then you will be more successful. I reckon a lot of people in pick up are in fact high on the sociopathic scale making you less inhibited by emotions. There’s this pick up artist I came across recently called Richard LaRuina and he has obvious sociopathic traits - he’s very charming and very detached. But if you’re a regular emotional guy like me it is harder so it begs the question what is a healthy way to develop detachment? Obviously suppressing emotions is a bad thing. Guys get the wrong idea about that and think they need to be logical and all that crap In recent years I have become a lot more detached and I put it down to these reasons: 1. Being more connected with consciousness so you do not need things so much including women 2. Understanding that power is in being vulnerable and fully embracing it 3. knowing that it is not up to you how the situation ultimately unfolds but the universe I still need to develop my detachment in a healthy way so wondering if people have any ideas

I think this is an important topic actually to get right. A lot of guys think to be detached means to suppress which of course leads to dysfunction It takes years of development

@mr_engineer for the detachment this is advantageous in the attraction stage so I don’t mean in an actual relationship So for sociopaths yeh they have an easy time hitting on women because they do not have the same emotional connectivity though in relationships I can only assume they cannot connect at that deeper more spiritual level I say to detach not by numbing myself but by being more connected with the divine so I do not need though I may only want the material goodies of life, the experiences etc

@lizz_luna some good stuff there yeh I’m definitely on the way to becoming a more attractive man. I actually thought to myself that this is what my personal development in my 30s is going to be. I have just turned 30 I still have insecurities though and it’s fully embracing that. I actually felt on reflection that my lingering anxiety around it is not because of the fear of rejection per se but actually because hitting on women in this flirtatious and direct way is unfamiliar to me. I never had a role model into this so I’m feeling into it as I go and embracing that identity The light of consciousness and divine spirit helps on the journey Bless you

I need to listen to this when I’m high

Just as an FYI he posts videos like how to make money or passive income because he is trying to attract the hordes of people on the internet looking to get rich. He’s trying to cut through by saying look the game is rigged, the rich have all the assets etc and the only way is to take back the assets from the rich and distribute back into society. Points to a bigger concern that we have been sold the idea that if you work hard you will make it but when you like at the data points this is not the case Do we continue to pursue the dream of being wealthy or do we accept that the game is rigged and try to change things politically rather than get stuck in the rat race Obvs not that you can’t still make it and become wealthy but it is becoming more out of reach for the average person. Meritocracy only works marginally but very very few actually make significant jumps up the wealth ladder unless you have rich parents and the right connects

very good

@jimwell As traders go he made himself a hell of a lot of money. He’s just a working class guy that just happened to win a competition that parachuted him in to trading. He discovered that it’s basically just rich kids that have family connects and go to the best universities that get into it He was primarily successful because he made trading decisions based on the premise that economic inequality will get worse. He’s been betting on that for awhile and made a lot of money on it. He understood the economy better than his colleagues because he was very mathematically savvy, but also because he wasn’t in the fantasy bubble of the rich in terms of the workings of the economy and the impact on inequality He has an autobiography about it. I like his style because he is telling people how it actually is in the real world of economics and why the system is ultimately pitted against you. You are up against the rich and their rich kids who buy up all the assets and have all the key connects with the best private education and lifestyle This guy deserves a blog post Leo! Kinda related to your post about Scott Galloway and looking after your kids as a very wealthy person vs collectively considering children as a whole because the rich can just get their kids to outcompete yours@Leo Gura

@bebotalk Big time. Have you watched it?

Curious to know how spirituality in the political realm would manifest - policies, programmes etc I see this as profoundly important. We hear all the time about the symptoms of a dysfunctional system but never the actual causes For example child poverty is a symptom and very well intentioned politicians will look at addressing the symptom only rather than the cause by providing something like free school meals or higher welfare payments These are great but there is never the mention of the actual cause - this being ultimately that society is deeply unspiritual and is still driven by material pursuits. This means that any good that is done by addressing the symptoms can be undone by the next government because there has been no focus on the spiritual dimension to elevate society’s consciousness How I see spirituality manifesting in politics would be these kind of programmes - legalisation of psychedelics and tripping centres - spirituality is an explored area in schools - spirituality concepts are part of mental health and wellbeing treatment plans - identifying spiritually gifted people and giving them proper channels to connect with the public

@MsNobody I do personally think that Only Fans is a shallow way to create value in the world. Like anyone can just do that really for guy/girls to get their kicks off of if you’re attractive enough Aside from that it’s a good way to explore your sexuality. Don’t feel bad about that. Just experience it. Good way to generate extra income to support your YT channel and other interests so make the most of it

@Javfly33 were you high when you wrote that

@Ramanujan I know it’s tough in India. The job market for youngsters is very competitive. A lot of broken promises by Modi Firstly don’t beat yourself up about it. It’s harder in India than where I live so I am fortunate about that. This does not mean you can’t get anywhere. One good thing about India is that it has spiritual traditions. Personal development should also involve the spiritual dimension so go deeper into that. When you are being spiritual get into that spacious awareness. Go deep into that and provided you give yourself time to connect without forcing anything insights will come. It is in this spaciousness that new ideas and actions will enter your thoughts to hopefully guide you I can’t provide the practical advice on game/software development though but others here can mention that to do alongside

@Nivsch There’s been a horrendous loss of life no matter what numbers are quoted. It is not just the lives that have been lost but the sheer torment that the Palestinians have had to live through. No comfort, no safety with death and destruction all around. This is not to mention the torture inflicted by Isreal on Palestinians The state of Isreal is just doing whatever the hell it wants to in the name of its holy war and national crusade against Gaza. I understand you may feel strongly about Isreal but the state has brought this on themselves. Karma is a very real thing and it will come back to bite Isreal in the ass massively. It already is as more people turn their back on supporting Isreal and ultimately see it as a toxic state that we should not do business with. I think Netanyahu has actually lost the fucking plot. He’s like Putin

I would engage more with the psychedelics if only I had more time. It’s a real commitment I find going into a trip. I do not do it casually

@INFP RACOON BABY sounds amazing. I’ve never gone to high doses with lsd but the most I did I just had the most intense feeling of ecstasy for the first half then second half became more channeling but through that I learnt some profound insights. Now we are finally back in the warming months I will be switching back to lsd from mushrooms I certainly haven’t had that many visuals on lsd other than the world looking a lot more vibrant instead just having very intense feelings of connected with everything. The ecstasy was so strong it almost felt too much

@StarStruck yes I know what you mean. I wear my heart on my sleeve and can easily get emotionally involved There’s no straight forward way other than building yourself up emotionally and spiritually so that you do not need, though you may only want a beautiful woman. It’s all about connection ultimately and the deepest connection can only be found within your eternal essence as consciousness

@trenton That situation you described is completely out of the blue. That to me seems very unusual though those situations do happen - what country do you live in? Some countries there are more scams and con artists so it depends where you live. In India for instance there is huge problem with people being scammed I understand that a situation like that can shake you up a bit. Don’t let it turn you cynical though but bring consciousness to those situations. Take time to be aware before responding. trust your intuition if it doesn’t feel right

@Clarence That’s tough sorry to hear that man I completely understand the burden that our elderly relatives can create for us. The neo liberal capitalist system does not provide much of a collective responsibility to the elderly so we can only do what we can whilst having to survive ourselves Do not feel bad that you want to leave that situation. It is massively holding your life back and of course you will want to get out. The truth is either your grandmother is really not in her normal headspace or is being very selfish - but don’t blame her for that. my grandfather has been a real burden for my dad. He is in a care home now but the amount of support he felt he had to provide him along with my grandmother. Both basically fucked and went down hill in the worst way. Parkinson’s, sepsis not good. You gotta help them but they wouldn’t even help my dad by making the support situation more tenable by moving closer so less travel time - this was not right. My grandfather has this expectation that he should be there for everything. This is wrong actually. You can support them but there is a limit to that Tbh it is just selfish. You are at the end of your life and your children are still living theirs. You should never feel like you have to help out of obligation but because you genuinely want to because the burden is very real. Honestly if I had kids I’d never want to put them or my grandkids through that. They have a life to lead and my body is on its way out. Personally if I had dementia, before losing it completely I’d rather have voluntary suicide. It would be the best way to go not just for you personally but for your relatives. Of course I’d like to think my kids would support me when I get old obviously but I would never expect them to be there for every beck and call to the point that it massively disrupts their lives. That’s just not fair I think this is a major issue. What I have just said there is extremely controversial though it shouldn’t be. We can only do what we can but don’t let this hold your life back. You cannot be responsible when you are young and have a life to lead Think about what the Buddha did. He did something very selfish by leaving his wife and kids needing to find an answer to suffering. He knew he could not do this in the situation he was in. Sometimes we have to be selfish to better served others in the future rather than becoming diminished. I would suggest finding a middle ground if you can but first and foremost don’t feel guilty for how you feel. That situation is a bitch and you are young

@Schizophonia so you claim

@TheGod You need to fundamentally build your inner game to become less needy. It’s fine to really want a woman but to never need her. Develop this with divine connection to the spirit so the love you get through that is greater than what you’ll ever get with a woman (I appreciate this is not easy so you don’t have to be Buddha just connect more deeply with the ethereal) As for woman it’s about honesty not being a jackass. So for example be direct with her so she knows what you want and that you’re not afraid to ask. Being the nice guy in other words basically means being overly polite and accommodating. Definitely fuck that off because you are holding back your true honesty final point and this is related to the spiritual dimension. Recognise you are not in control in how she responds. It is up to the universe. Take yourself out of the determining outcome and you’ll feel less pressured to make it happen when it is not you but the universe that ultimately decides. Also just a comment on your friend. If he is able to compulsively lie he does sound like he has sociopathic traits. Sociopaths do tend to find pickup easier because they are more emotionally detached but do not think that this is a good thing. Being detached from your emotions may grant material rewards easier but won’t help you connect with the deeper dimensions. Your capacity to feel hurt is equal to your capacity to feel deep love and divine connection. As someone with emotions the way to detach is to connect with the ethereal so you are not numbing your emotions it is just that you simply do not need as before. Also show compassion for your neediness in this area! you’re just a human after all unless deeply connected with the divine

@r0ckyreed Just make sure you trust the person you’re buying it from. I have never tested psychedelics I consume. Tbh I don’t know how. I’ve bought mushrooms and lsd from this dude. He’s basically a hippie so no issue This guy he does psychedelic retreats as well. Find someone like that

In the last year I have basically completely stopped watching porn. Just feels quite icky to me now not to mention the abuse many women face. This twisted world of porn websites just feels unaligned I think one big issue is that it artificially stimulates. I would watch porn not even feeling like it but just to do it because it was something pleasurable to do. But this is like artificially stimulating yourself Saying this I think no fap is excessive and for myself it’s not practical. You gotta release lol

Good to see Leo back, here’s a few additions 1. Trap of overthinking - this is where it is not advisable to overthink traps and what may or may not be a trap. Being aware is all you need. Overthinking can paralyse decision making when it’s often, if not always, best to go with your intuition (though I note our intuition is not always right but better to be guided by that and fall into a trap than do so via the thinking mind which will be more often) 2. Trap of believing you have absolute control over your life - simple fact is you don’t. Most of your life is out of your control and the traps you encounter are just part of the tapestry of the universe. You can only connect the dots looking back. 3. Trap of rushing into things - actually most traps can be avoided by not falling into this trap. Rather than overthinking how to proceed, take your time and be mindful of your actions. Bring consciousness into it. I’ve fallen into this trap a few times! Always comes back to bite me in the ass

@Leo Gura Ooooohhhh 😱