Tenebroso

Why do you assume stage green women would not be interested in one night stands and bad boys?

@hoodrow trillson What's the difference between kind and nice? Seems the nice/kind goalpost is always moving.

Sometimes it feels like everything we do is wrong or can be interpreted as malevolent My impression is that attraction is nothing to do with being good or bad, it's about looks, status and chemistry. If you are attractive, then everything you is interpreted positively, while people assume the worst about unattractive people.

@Princess Arabia Your right, maybe I am overthinking and confusing myself, I sense your impatience with me.

I was responding to Javfly33's video but I think you are right. "Or are you saying women that you don't know but desire should want you to desire them" I needed to read this to step out of my box and see it from the woman's point of view. However, if I find someone attractive am I meant to hide it??

So our desires as males are wrong and unwanted. It feels like women regard male desire as a burden.

I don't think men NEED to sleep with 20+ women but the men I know who get laid the most seem to be less neurotic and anxious. I think women feel that lack of anxiety and interpret it as a signal of safety, regardless of how safe the actual man is and I think this why bad boys can do so well. When you don't get laid and you are out there trying, it feels like the stakes increase with every encounter. That's why although positive thinking and attempting to feel confident are good things, without tangible results, it is difficult to cultivate that ease around women that players naturally exude.

So you have to believe you are worthy of an attractive woman and that self image gets reflected back to you in how she responds to you? What do you mean when you say average looking guys are the target? Why would they be the target?

Very relevant to the world today. When she spoke about Marilyn Monroe, she could have been speaking about the infinite number of IG Model's and their adoring followers. Both the follower and the adored feel empty, the latter because men only see the surface and the former because the feminine becomes this unattainable object. Also when she spoke about the balance of the masculine and feminine, the male reaction to the new female independence, she could have been speaking about the Red Pill/MGTOW movements.

I think in 2024, Chico the model is considered by far the most attractive He has almost become the standard for young men to aspire to. Women, including older women seem to be looking for more feminine, pretty looking men. I am the exact same age as Chico, born the same year and I observe guys with his look always doing well with women. One thing I have noticed however is that the prettiest most feminine women are the ones more attracted to the more masculine looking men, with hard features.

Reading the sentence, I had a feeling you was talking about Hegre because it's the best example of conscious, healthy porn and I can't think of anything similar. Their videos have a completely different energy to most well known porn companies. It seems judging by your story that if you pay attention to the right details, you increase the frequency of synchronicities that are aligned with your needs and wants. I am a bit of a day dreamer, it takes a lot of effort for me to pay close attention to something and when I do it is often things that don't serve me.

I will give you a tip in terms of high consciousness porn. Hegre Art, you will thank me later. Also hardcore stuff is not low consciousness as long as everyone is consenting. Humans are horny and physical, we shouldn't deny it. I feel no shame in watching Amateur Femdom spanking lol

I have what some may say is an unhealthy obsession with attraction. I have to say this is easily one of the best, if not the best video I have seen on the subject. There seems to be a tug of war between our lower and higher selves. Her explanation makes me more sympathetic towards women. So base level of consciousness is based more on sexual tension that is produced between opposites and survival but survival looks slightly different for everyone. Many people are stuck at this level of consciousness. I can see how more dominant men fulfill a need for women at this stage of consciousness. The more we grow, the more nuanced attraction becomes. The unconscious goal of humans overall is to reach wholeness so we seek sometimes healthy but sometimes destructive relationships with the goal getting what we need to reach this sense of oneness. It's almost mathematical, x is some ever elusive wholeness and we look to combine with another person to reach x. Our idea of the divine will be reflected in what we seek in others. Ironically the more developed and whole a person is the less they need another person to complete them. Attraction becomes more complicated because you are not responding to the body but to the needs of your souls and karmic journey, maybe this explains why we see some unusual couple pairings. Trauma also plays less of a role at later stages of development, I guess because you become less identified with the body and this particular lifetime. As you increase in consciousness you might still be attracted to people at lower levels of consciousness to remain grounded. Specific types represent a specific medicine. We are either attracted to our high self/divine image or we are attracted to our wounding. If we develop but are still attracted to the same types in our previous state then we might be stuck in a Karmic Loop. Maybe this is why so many women can't shake off the attraction to the bad boy. Women were oppressed from the beginning of the industrial age to basically the 1970s and they perhaps developed a collective spiritual and psychological stockholm syndrome where they want to throw the patriarchal shackles on the surface but are deeply drawn to the the shadow of masculinity. So smart, self aware women today are confused when they meet a nice, seemingly harmless, pleasant man and they feel nothing because he does nothing to trigger her wound which needs to be healed. Interesting that she says that the collective is dealing with age 15 type attraction. Matches what I see, all the discussions about modern dating dynamics are very base level. I have to include myself, I am still internally stuck trying to heal the rejected 15 year old wound, a girl school at predicted I would always struggle with women and she was right. I also find I am nearly always attracted to very dominant, strong women and the few positive experiences with women have always been older, smarter and dominant. I find more passive, introverted women tend not to like me at all. It probably doesn't take long for them to figure out that I cannot help them integrate, if they are at the lower levels of consciousness. I love the way she explains things. Our attraction is always aligned with our specific developmental curriculum. So it is important to look beneath the surface and figure out the symbolism of what you are attracted to and why, it will tell you a lot about yourself. So they key is the search for balancing and this balance can be reached through responding to our soul/higher self/divine image, karmic cycle or trauma. Also the balance of masculine and feminine. Next time I meet a woman I am attracted to, I am going to ask myself....What does she need? What is her level of consciousness? Am I her medicine? lol......Am I her next step in consciousness? The most evolved people often don't have partners because they have become so balanced. It's a bit of a catch 22 because at lower levels of consciousness you kind have to hope that your need to integrate matches with another persons needs but at higher levels it becomes so subtle and layered that two people who could be great for each other miss each other. Like attracts like as you raise in consciousness. When we are focused on soothing our wounds we seek it's opposite. What we find highly attracted in another is either a quality we have in ourselves or a potential. That explains my attraction to the most extroverted, uninhibited, confident alpha women who happen to usually be nicer to me than other women although I have yet to actually manage to get into a relationship with one but maybe I should pursue this type more confidently and they are looking for me, just maybe. She admits it's kind of complicated, that was a lot to take in for a 34 minute video had to listen very carefully the second time. This is a bit of a mess, sorry to anyone who has to read this.

Very interesting, I am going to listen a second time before I express my opinion. You seem to be a one stop encyclopedia for all things esoteric. Thanks for sharing.

@NoSelfSelf There is a smugness to your answers on here, it's quite pathetic. People take different paths to growing, it doesn't mean you have to mock them. I am sure there are parts of your life where your are clueless and insecure.

What if you approach many women and get rejected every time? For the compound of momentum to develop somebody has to say yes at some point.

I agree that women don't necessarily have it easier, it's just different problems. I guess the core issue for men is overcoming the hurdle of being invisible, just being seen is an achievement for the average man but for most women that is trivial. I guess women are looking for deep compatibility, the needle in the haystack that inspires her and makes her feel alive. So it feels like for most you have to focus on quantity and just shoot your shot until a woman takes a chance on you while, women are focused on quality, filtering for the best guy they can get. Most men don't seem to have whatever sparks that deep attraction in women, so I assume that must feel very disappointing. One thing I hear often is women wishing they were lesbian, being attracted to men seems to be burden while I have read of men who wish they could turn off their sex drive since it's so difficult to be a guy gets his needs met, I have had those feeling myself.

Of course, I don't deny. A good example if you follow Tik Tok is The West Elm Caleb situation. A guy in New York who went viral for sleeping with multiple women and leading them on, all these girls thought they were the only one until they started sharing notes and realized they were all sleeping with the same man. So all these women were having sex with one guy and many of the guys who they ignored were sleeping with nobody.

One man might be involved with many women on and off. So it follows, if every woman is having sex it doesn't mean every man is.

My experience in starting conversations with women is either a blank gaze that says stop talking to me or just overt disgust that I had the audacity to start a conversation. I am not sure proximity is as important as it used to be in 2024, it seems social media is more important. A girl I grew up with and is part of my social circle is currently dating a well known rapper. She is not an instagram model, posting revealing pictures or anything yet a rapper DM'ed her and she has spent the last year travelling the world with this rapper who has spoken in interviews about sleeping with thousands of women and having orgies. How am I meant to compete with that? When the women my age, in my proximity can just be plucked from obscurity at any time by the most high status men. It seems if you are not very attractive being incredibly famous is the only way to not be invisible.

@Chadders Your point is simple but perceptive. I think you are correct, there is seemingly a self-esteem crisis and that 'third' approach to attraction has become very important. I am imagine people with strong self image, little to no trauma, stable attachment find each other and pair off quietly.

What makes respect mature and disrespect immature? Explain it like I am 5, I am not seeing the connection.

The message on social media seems to be not to approach, it seems women want to be left alone unless you can read her mind and know the exact day, time and moment she is receptive to meeting anyone. I think women today actually initiate contact with the most popular men through social media. Male content creators and athletes have spoken about becoming well known and women just offering themselves to them in very direct way. It seems high status undercuts the assumed more patient, dynamic nature of female attraction. While a woman might not consciously want to be a side-piece or a harem member, she still might be drawn to a certain guy who other women are competing for. She might feel she is settling for the guy she does end up with, one thing I see increasingly expressed is the desire to be single instead of settling, if they can't get the exact dream guy they want. So if you are not one of the guys, either you are hoping to be given a chance by someone who feels she is settling for you or the women in your league would rather stay alone than give you a chance.

Would you tell your son to wait, while women go through their trial and error phase with bad boys? I don't see how this is an inspiring or encouraging message to young men. On social media women who have moved past this phase and are beginning to date men who are emotionally available, kind and stable express frustration at not feeling the spark of attraction with these men. Is being warm-hearted, stable, trustworthy really actually attractive in itself or are these just qualities women wished the men they are already attracted to have. I don't think the problems of modern dating is a shortage of men with these qualities.

It seems in an unrestricted society, this is the way it is.