Tenebroso

Not really. They broke up shortly after I was born and I am not enjoying life. I increasingly feel life is not worth living, so I resent them for bringing into the world through the vessel of a loveless relationship with no real ability to help or teach me anything.

"What is my biggest fear if a woman sees my scars?" Some of my past rejections were in the form of facial expressions where the girl seemed to have a physiological reaction to me like "ewww".....I imagine if I got to the stage where they actually saw my body that would trigger a similar reaction and because it would be a reaction to scars that represent actual physical suffering that is another layer of pain beyond just a simple romantic rejection. What do you think about Ekhart Tolle and his idea of the pain body? The idea that we carry all the traumas and negative emotions around that we have to learn how to transmute.

"How are you trying to protect or serve yourself by holding onto the idea that women aren't interested in anyone but the highest status guys?" Well, extreme fear of rejection is obviously a factor. My self esteem has never been high and I did not get much validation from anywhere growing up. So I find it difficult to believe anyone would like me. Father was not around and mother was depressed for most of my childhood due to my childhood illness. I spent most of my childhood until the age of 11 in a Children's hospital. I was a bit behind socially compared to my peers and got bullied ruthlessly. The girls would say "you are going to die a virgin" and a group of boys would say everyday....."nobody loves you". I had multiple operations as a child and have scars and stitches all over my body, I am basically a Frankenstein monster naked. So one thing i have realized is that I would probably have to explain a whole lot of painful personal stuff to any woman I become intimate with. Maybe I am avoiding that. However, I did find my tribe late in high school and went through a more extroverted phase between age 17-22, where I became very outgoing and had a wide social circle. I tried to date and got rejected every time. I have never denied that I have my flaws and traumas but so do many and yet they are able to find mates. So while I concede that my point of view is heavily coloured by deep internal wounds, it can't be the only reason. It is clear dating is not what it was 15 years ago let alone half a century ago. Looks and status have never mattered more.

Most men grow up wanting hot girls that is true but dating is harsh for most men. The majority of learn our place in the hierarchy very quickly and adjust. There are literal international supermodels 15 minutes away from me in my city but I don't fantasize or even think about approaching them because I have zero chance. They date Formula One Drivers, CEO's and Premier League Soccer players.

@Emerald Good post. I think the most attractive men that women are competing for have so many options that woman do need the man to invest more in the beginning. That is the way it should work in theory but these men have so many options that women cannot help but put all their cards on the table to out compete the other women. Less attractive men should either drop out of the dating scene in this ruthless era or exercise extreme patience and discernment in identifying the very small pool of women who might see value in them, otherwise consistent rejection will chip away at your self esteem and trigger unhealthy resentment towards women. We should be teaching boys that there is a possibility you will not attract women or get dates, to kill the entitlement and expectation. The every man gets a wife just for existing and doing the bare minimum era has died and it's not coming back. We are returning to a more natural state with regards to mating patterns due to the freedom women now have. Older women are increasingly sleeping and dating much younger fuckboys or "Chads". So maybe the desire to settle down with the mature beta is not innate but something women were socialized to do and now they have the freedom and independence at least in the west to choose a man based on lust and desire for as long as they want. I think what you are saying about choosing mature beta may have been true in the previous paradigm but I think we are witnessing a shift. In he west mature, successful, financially independent women already get companionship from their girlfriends, they don't really need men anymore so the only men who get chose now are the ones who really hit the spot in therms of lust and desire. What do you think?

Majed definitely smoking some tainted weed.

What makes me seem depraved?

Not enough Chads for women to be interested. Being a spiritual, self actualizing man does not improve your attractiveness to women.

@MsNobody You can't just wake up one morning and to decide to have a girlfriend. If only it was that easy. Most men do not have options.

My experience with both archetypes of women is mostly negative. Neither seem to like me. Women don't seem to like me period. The few that have are so different from each other that it is hard to discern a pattern. However, this is helpful. Thanks.

Selfless, artistic, funny, charismatic but manipulative. Why? Are you trying to psychoanalyze me?

So kind, reserved, sensitive men who need a hug are popular with women in your reality? Since reality is so dependent on our beliefs and everyone is sharing their experiences on this forum there should be stories of the kind of men I describe being incredibly popular after all if the serial killers can attract women why wouldn't the shy guy? Where is that reality? Why is it on every dating forum across and across social media women themselves speak of the allure of men who they know are bad for them. I never see these kinds of videos for the average, sensitive man just trying to figure things out.

I am not any of those things but I have been in street fights in situations where I had no choice but to defend myself and there is a startling primal shift in behaviour when women have seen you fight. Also I am not a bad boy at all, I am mostly shy and unsure of myself but I have been told by a close friend that my quietness comes across as a quiet aloofness and some women find it alluring. I am often moody and sarcastic and when I am in that mood I can become quite rude. I remember once telling this girl at University to get on her knees in the library. I was in a bad mood and wanted to say something to make her go away thinking "of course she won't get on her knees in front of everyone in the library but she will leave me alone" This young woman who is now married to a Swedish Priest, got on her knees in the library. Basically I am not popular with women. I have never pretended to be someone I am not on here. However, the times I have managed to attract a woman have never been for what many consider positive qualities. Some of directly said they like me because I don't treat them well. My kind, sensitive, light hearted side has never attracted a woman. Let me guess my experiences mean nothing......

Even if I was miserable in real life wouldn't matter if I had the right bone structure and features. This myth about vibe, being a good person etc is getting embarrassing, women can barely conceal it anymore although they try with the aid of upstanding gentlemen like you. Even if they are not looking to date serial killers, the fact is morality has nothing to do with attraction and as long as the gaslighting of men continues, I will continue to make my points as I please. Give yourself a pat on the back. I guess you're a good man who needs to put someone in their place, have a cookie. You're the idiot. You see, I can trade personal insults about someone I don't know too. How evolved and noble. I don't give a **** about what you think. Keep it moving if you don't like my posts idiot.

Start a cult. Women love a cult leader.

Carry on posting these, make them uncomfortable

If you want guarantee results become a bad person. Lie, cheat, steal and be as destructive as possible to everyone around you and suddenly you will have too many options. I actually spoke to a girl who dated a serial killer who killed multiple women and she said she wasn't manipulated by him she actively chased him. Women will never admit these things, so you have test different approaches yourself. In my personal life living in a big city it is interesting that the worst most violent men I know never have these issues, they are not the one suffering from the male loneliness crisis but average are gaslighted into something is wrong with their personality.

Good looking men don't need the clubs women go straight to their DMs on social media. Personality means little to nothing to women. A man has to reach a standard attractiveness just to not be invisible and the woman has to be in a place in her life where she wants those kinds of encounters.

Maybe women are to not capable of love. Lesbian divorce and domestic violence rates are very high. Any relationship which involves a woman is difficult to maintain.

Never used an Escort but from what I see they are generally repulsed by their clients. I don't know how guys do it, would rather die a virgin than deal with that lack of desire.

Would never see an escort even if it was the only way to have sex. Would rather die alone untouched. Mutual desire is a big part of the allure of sex, paying turns the act into something robotic and pathetic.

You didn't get the message? You are supposed to to accept anything a woman does or you are insecure.

@Average Actualizer I guess serial killers and abusers have high vibrations, that is why women can't keep their hands off them.

Even without knowing the stats I have observed that women initiate violence just as much as men but not with the same force. However, society is very uncomfortable with this topic.

@Butters What a pathetic response to a man trying to highlight an important issue. Pathetic, let me guess you are one of the so called good men who exist to shut down conversation.