onacloudynight

I agree. Probably wasn't a bright idea to ask on this forum. Lol

How so? Maybe I don't want to live in a cave right this very moment, but it definitely is something I am considering. I feel like this could be practical advice for us bent more towards solitude.

I just tried to go 7 days without internet and phone. Needless to say I got to 3 days. I have basically used internet for as long as I can remember. It literally feels exactly like withdrawing from a drug. My mind was going crazy. Wild mood swings and everything, I felt like I wanted to kill someone honestly. I could barely function without out it. I think the key is to gradually cut back and not just stop cold turkey. Dam those 3 days were hell. I think there is something wrong honestly if you can't be happy without internet. I dare anyone to try this!

Exactly. What if I'm a sociopath? Is personal development pointless to me? Its not like sociopaths chose to be sociopaths. We are just supposed to completely reject them? How is that unconditional love? Just because they have a different lens with which they see the world doesn't make their way "wrong."

Does this sound common to anyone? For basically over a year and a half, my emotions are all over the place.I can be extremely high and blissful, feeling love for everything, then I fall down into depression where I don't feel like doing anything. This is really causing problems in my life. I feel really sensitive to everything and am not able to work because I feel too sensitive to everyones emotions and I can get irritable easily. I know all of these symptoms can be a byproduct of meditation and enlightenment work, but at what point do I just say fuck it and start taking medication, I can't function like this, everyone thinks I am crazy sometimes. I was at a restaurant with my family and had to excuse myself, because I was overcome with an enormous amount of bliss and love and I just wanted lie down and laugh at everything. It would be one thing if I was in bliss and love all the time, but I fall right back down into depression. I just want to be stable. I never seem to have any sense of stability. It is always up and down. It really is confusing if this is a mental illness or is part of the awakening process.

Probably, but I also think I might be bipolar as well. I know some of the symptoms are similar.

My problem is not really with the mood shifts, its the fact that my motivation changes drastically when I am up and down, so I can never seem to stay consistent with anything. I get really motivated when I'm up and I start working on my life, getting things done, then I hit a deep depression, which makes it hard to work on anything.

I'm just wondering if these extreme ups and downs will be permanent or will they eventually even out as you meditate years down the road?

It would be one thing if this was just an every once in awhile occurrence and I have seen therapists in the past, but I just keep going through these cycles and it has lasted for almost 2 years with hardly any stability. I am thinking about just trying medication to see if it will help. it could very well be a biological issue. I can always get off of it.

I am 20 years old. I have done exercise in the past and it helped a little, but I still got depressed. I have just been having an existential crises. Everything just seems extra meaningless. My diet could be better, but I eat relatively healthy. I am just really isolated. No one seems to understand me. Hard to talk about stuff like this without people thinking you're crazy.

@OnewithVerse I have been doing that for almost 2 years lol. I don't know how anyone could live like this forever. I have no middle ground. I am either up in the clouds are in the depths of hell. I guess ill just ride this rollercoaster ride for eternity.

I'm very addicted to music. Especially since I've become more mindful of music. Music to me is very magical and awe-inspiring, which produces so much bliss and euphoria in me. Highly addicting indeed.

Do a 10 day vipassana retreat and then come back to me and tell me you aren't more aware.

This right here is why we need to cut internet addiction. This forum seems far from conscious, including myself here as well.

You obviously haven't done mindfulness meditation.

@Joseph Maynor Do it! Wish you luck.

@Study Yeah, I know all I really did was meditate and read books. It didn't help that I was snowed in as well. Probably would have helped if I could have gone out. Oh well. Better luck next time I guess.

I also believe this little endeavor made me more conscious. I think being on the internet all the time isn't really good for raising your consciousness.

@Joseph Maynor Music and youtube videos specifically. I seem to be really addicted to the highs that music produces in me.

Basically I have had sex with someone once, but my skills with women SUCK in general. My excuse for not doing pickup is that even if I get really good with women, eventually I know that I will leave it and devote my life to consciousness work. I don't see the point in wasting all that time getting good with women, when I could just put all that time into meditating.

My biggest addiction is internet as well. Maybe you could do a one week internet fast to reset your brain.

I seem to be noticing a trend. Here lately I've been shifting into different states. It almost feels like different personalities. I feel on some days I am low consciousness and feel angry and blah. Others I feel like a hippie, full of bliss and love. Obviously the latter feels much better, I know you are not supposed to attach yourself to different states, but I was wondering if it is possible to eventually be in those states all the time.

I second this. Also maybe sometime you could do a livestream Q&A session for people online. I know Koi Fresco has done this through YouNow.

This is a brilliant idea! I always wished this was a thing. It is also a good way for us to meet more conscious individuals. Too bad I'm on the East Coast.

@kieranperez The reason you feel sad when you see people in a relationship is because you are still identified with an ego. Here is a good reframe: Whenever you see a couple walking down the street instead of focusing your attention on your perceived lack of connection with people, focus it on the couple and take joy in the fact that two fellow human beings look happy together. Their happiness is also your happiness