Flicker_boy

baby don't hurt me! no more!

oh, and this energetic phenomena you just described seems an awful lot like the descriptions of the arising and passing away event (A&P event) which inevitably results in the start of the dark night

There are some maps that I found really useful for navigating dark night territory. You might benefit learning about it's typical stages and emotinal manifestations. Here: http://integrateddaniel.info/mind-maps-full-size/ There's also some more 50 pages on this on his book which you can download from his website. Best of luck my dude, may all beings be happy, may all beings be free.

you are probably stuck in the dark night of the soul for so long it started to interfere with functioning. I'm with you bro, I did many fucked up things because of the dark night. I'm sure finishing this cycle would clear things up for you although it might not be the solution to all your problems. When you are stuck in the dark night the most importante thing is to keep practicing and try not to let it bleed into your relative life.

@mikeyy same here. It's probably because you have more beliefs and biases towards them. It also happens to me a lot when I'm with close friends. @Immortal peace with time you may start to appreciate that as an oportunity to deconstruct your ego even more. Just imagine making your crazy family into your personal hellish zen monastery kkk

it appears to me most women egos are quite supported/cushioned from reality by society while they're still young and fresh kkk... I heard sadhguru saying that nowadays a womans life is basically a beauty contest until they are old and thus they usually only turn to spiritual matters at that point, although he's probably biased... nah mate, just blame it on eve

I got into it cause I wanted chicks hahahah. oh boy, little did I know where it would take me

so i've been meditating for some time now and want to take up some physical exercise in my routine. yoga is currently on my mind cause i've been told it goes well with meditation. any thoughts on this? how do they enhance one another? what are the 'spiritual' benefits of yoga? can it take you to enlightenment alone?

@Leo Gura got it. Just read some reports on aya, very few mention experiencing the void indeed.

@Leo Gura yeah, too many distracting features i guess. I'll look for the yopo snuff.

@Leo Gura do you think ayahuasca can also provide a breakthrough to infinity? I'm considering working with it since its very accessible here in brazil

sooo, i was looking for a more accessible alternative to 5-meo-dmt and was thinking of aya, since there are dozens of cerimonial places in my city. Do you fellow actualizers think its a fair substitution? Can it show me infinity? Is it a wise, sustainable option for self-actualization and insight?

sooo, i was looking for a more accessible alternative to 5-meo-dmt and was thinking of aya, since there are dozens of cerimonial places in my city. Do you fellow actualizers think its a fair substitution? Can it show me infinity? Is it a wise, sustainable option for self-actualization and insight?

careful with greed friendo

ego seems to be na ideological/perceptual tyranny of patterns in the activity of consciousness. the default operational system is to put ideas in the center of the experience so as to provide reference points for reactions, how to. thought thus starts making politics, the one with the most seducing fantasy conquers the hive. sometimes something shakes consciousness. some experiences may produce interference patterns with the predictable patterns of conditioning, providing a brief instability of the operational system and a loss of reference. and then there may be a seeing through the cracks of it, beyond. after that a new or modified OS takes center stage again or it doesn't anymore. any new center will soon show it's limitations. at some point, it'll crack again. electricity is simple. the loss of energy is proportional to resistance. and any center has to fight against the things it denies: unsatisfactoriness, no-self and impermanence.

do you think that's valid for weed too? I've noticed weed changed after lsd

my stoner/psychonaut friends, they still think I'm mad though

@electroBeam who handles ego death?? you can't handle ego death, that's crazy! the thing that is handling it is the thing that vanishes from existence. death is going to have its way with you either way, better let go of struggle while you still can

loving-kindness, compassion, sympathetic joy and equanimity*

it has become clear to me that we activelly shut down awareness of genitals etc when interacting socially (clothes might be another expression of this) and that everytime i fully open up to a experience- any experience, even meditating- sexual energies are also involved. but to jump from there and make assumptions about sexual preferences is unskillful (to put it mildly). the energy is yours, it's your doing, its an integral part of your being, and probably not as much related to circumstances as you might think. just use them for whatever you think its best

maybe you wanna check this out other than that just relax and keep practicing, it's not like you're dying or anything ;-D

no spectator. no free-will, absolute free-will, god's will its all the same. doesn't really matter to think about it, keep practicing well.

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