Spiritual Warrior

A primary choice is a conscious choice that you make, such as I want a well trimmed body. A secondary choice is making the choice or series of choices that will lead to the primary choice being actualized. For example, I want a well trimmed body (primary choice). I will go to the gym 3 days a week (secondary choice). I will eat 3000 calories/day for 8 weeks (secondary choice.) I will eat 2300 calories/ day for 8 weeks (secondary choice.) I will repeat this process over and over and over again for an entire year (secondary choice.) Throughout this process of actualizing a primary choice, you will encounter resistance, such as having the thought "I've worked hard all week, surely I can take today off from going to the gym," or "Surely I can take a break from meal planning just for today." When these thoughts arise, your job is to make the secondary choice to go to the fucking gym because you want to actualize the primary choice, which was consciously made by you.

The other thing that I want to make myself aware of is that nobody is doing what I'm doing. Literally nobody in my immediate circle has gotten into pick up. Every single one of my friends lets something fall into their lap and then wifes her up. This is the unconscious way to do it. Because it's the easiest. It is the path of least resistance. My roommate just got divorced after two years of marriage, he meets a girl at a bar, she is his girlfriend now and he's already talking about getting married to her. Like what the fuck... What is wrong with these people. Do you allow your life to run you or are you running your life? The thing that makes the work here on actualized.org so valuable is that we are shining light on the things that most people are completely blind to. We are building a life consciously, we are not letting society or circumstances dictate what we do in our lives. This is what sets me apart from other people (at least in my area). Yes, I have a lot to work on but I am strategically and systematically building the life that I want for myself. And I'm sorry but I don't think other people are doing this. I know this because when I ask people "What is your vision for your life?" Their answers are wishy washy. They don't fucking know or don't care enough to just sit down and plan it out. It takes work to think about what you actually want to create in your life, the easier path is to just run on auto pilot and let your environment run it for you. This is what most people are doing. As a dance instructor, I would like to make it my duty to encourage people to dream big. Most people just don't believe in themselves, that is the core issue. And it's sad... very sad. And to be aware of why you are acting the way that you are in the moment that you're doing it, this takes work. To look for the truth of the situation instead of remaining unconscious to it. Again, being unconscious is a million times easier, but we are not looking for easy solutions, we are just looking for real ones. When I act immature, I am consciously aware of it. When I act selfish, I am consciously aware of it. When I judge others, I am consciously aware of it. When my ego gets triggered, I am consciously aware of it. When I give myself resistance, I am consciously aware of it. When I a suppress my true desires, I am consciously aware of it.

Exploring the Feminine Entry #1 Alright, so I am starting to like this girl from work. Its super obvious that she flirts with me. Then again, does she actually like me or is she just using me for attention / validation / entertainment ... Thats the mind fuck... I would like to seduce her ... but how? I know from experience that women will not initiate sex... they just won't ... I have to take full responsibility for having sex with this girl... I don't want to date her... I want to fuck her.. Plain and simple.. Next steps... I don't know honestly... Just keep being conscious of what you are doing... Continue to be the attractive man that you are by developing yourself, working out, hitting on attractive women, saying what you want when you want, being vulnerable, not over-investing in one girl, etc... You are the man... These women love you.. One thing that you can consciously practice is acting like yourself when you're around this girl. I have had this problem before, where I would be unable to act like myself around the girl that I'm crushing on. I couldn't act myself because I wanted her to like me SO SO SO SO bad. I was willing to give myself up, give up my authentic self in order to get the attention from a girl... I will never do that again... One practical thing that I can do from now on is drink less... How on earth can I move around a venue or a party / get-together and strategize hitting on women and getting laid if I am piss drunk. You think that this is helping but it is not. Be the man and have your limits and boundaries set. Don't let the environment sway you from your path. I would also like to say that if you have sex with this girl and then start dating her.. then what.. you're not going to continue with your pick up journey.. Isn't that what you wanted to do? I did but I really do just want to fall in love. Thats all I want... Then again I know seducing her is going to take some time... You are engaging in pickup in your attempt to seduce her and also your cold - approaches... It is all part of the same journey.. It is all connected. Lets get grinding...

Intermission Since deciding to get back into pickup, I've been experiencing ego backlash. I have been jerking off a lot, being lazy, not standing by my own habits, etc. The funny thing is I've actually been a lot happier since Ive decided to start my pick up journey again. It was as if I had this burning desire inside of myself that Ive been hiding from and now it is out in the open and I am going to fully embrace it. What made me fall off of the pick up journey was that I got a girlfriend, she loved me, I loved her, she was nice to me, we had sex, we went on trips together, she made me laugh. It was a beautiful period in my life. But I always had this nagging desire to get back into pick up, and when she started to talk about getting married in as soon as a couple of years, I knew that it wasn't a good idea to continue any further. A man embarks on the pick up journey not for the fruits, but for the growth that he will get from obtaining said fruits. The main things that I'm working on right now in my life are: 1. Finances, getting income up so that I can live comfortably. 2. Pick up, hitting on women as often as possible and having sex with them. 3. Being more mature, delaying instant gratification in favor of long term principles and values, sticking to habits such as working out 3 times a week, making sure my caloric intake is at least 2700 calories, meditating every morning, 4. Living with integrity, not doing anything for blatantly selfish reasons, caring about the feelings of other, understanding that you have your own biasees. Continue to work on these things and in just a few years you will be a very attractive, mature, highly conscious young man. At the end of this period, I predict that you will truly be ready to take the leap into tier two thinking, the systems approach. Then you will start to dissolve the ego.

The Success Principles by Jack Canfield. This is a phenomenal book that contains all of the practical tips on how to get what you want out of life. Its time that I start focusing on this aspect as I would like to be a successful, mature, and financially independent man that enjoys his work and has an abundance of wealth in relationships, women, sex, and money. I am going to work on this aspect of my life by going through the book chapter by chapter and doing the exercises honestly. This is stage orange, I am trying to integrate and maximize stage orange in my life, that is the goal here. Lets get started. Principle 1: Take 100% Responsibility for Your Life I feel like I have a good grasp on this in my life. I will not be making any excuses, there is no blaming, no making other people feel bad for me. This is where I am at, I take full responsibility for where I am at in life. And I take full responsibility for what I am doing about it and where I am heading. It is my life, it is my responsibility to take ownership of it and make it my own. Principle 2: Be Clear Why You're Here I am here because I would like to maximize stage orange. I want success, love, intimate partners, sex, good looks, I want all of the material desires that I can think of. Principle 3: Decide What you Want Lets focus on this chapter today, deciding what I want. Write it down, be clear about it. Going to read this chapter today.

I've started to walk around in a way that says "I am looking for women to hit on" the problem is that I'm not doing it. Soon enough I will look back at this post and laugh because of how far I have come, but I have to put in the work. Do you know what method I REALLY believe in... Visualization and affirmations. Visualize hitting on women every morning. Affirm that you will have sex with beautiful women every day, make your meals every two days, be mature, don't masturbate while using porn. I know that I have to put in the work but I am on the right path and Im not confused anymore. I know EXACTLY what I must do. Things have never been so clear to me. These women are going to love the fact that a highly conscious, highly developed, attractive man is hitting on them. One of the things that I want to start doing is just walk up to a woman and tell her that I think she's beautiful and then walk away. The problem right now is that I don't have the courage to walk up to her because I don't know how to carry the conversation on. Just tell her she's beautiful and walk away. Baby steps. Keep taking baby steps. Eventually it will compound. And you have to genuinely think she's beautiful or cute or gorgeous. It has to be congruent.

Exploring the Feminine Entry #19 6:09 PM 11/11/24 I am quite rusty when it comes to pick up but I know I have to get back out there. I envision where I can take this in 2-3 years and that's what excites me. I sometimes have thoughts about my ex and how I want her back. She really was a great girlfriend and really did love me, but the issue was that I wasn't ready to get wifed up. I felt like if I never finished my pick up journey then I would always regret it. When I think of wanting my ex back, this thought arises because I am being cowardly. I don't want to plunge back into pick up because it's scary, very scary. I don't want to jump back into the depths of the ocean... But the reality is that deep down, I actually do. I broke up with this girl for a reason, and I did not take this decision lightly. I want to explore my sexuality with multiple partners. I want the growth experience of hitting on lots of women. I want to better understand the dynamics between the feminine and the masculine so that I can one day write a book about it. The issue right now is that the thought of hitting on a girl is very daunting to me. I want to take baby steps. What I am going to do for the first week is I will go to a coffee shop every morning with my laptop. I have actual work to do on there anyways. I am going to position myself near an attractive girl and set my computer up to actually do some work. Next, I am going to walk up to this girl and ask her if she can watch my computer while I go to the bathroom. I will put awareness on the way that I open the girl, saying something like "Excuse me, miss," *smile, then say "Would you mind watching my computer while I go to the bathroom?" You want to have a deep but friendly voice that does not come off as needy. Do this over and over and over again. Once I get used to the "Excuse me, miss" opener, I will move onto actually hitting on the girl. In this situation at a coffee shop, I could say "Excuse me, miss," *she looks at me "Hi, I saw you from over there and I just think you're really cute and I just wanted to say hi." The key here is to keep it playful and light and fun. That is more my style. Don't put too much stake in this encounter. This is one of many. Then I can start doing this at libraries, parks, bars, on the street, anywhere. The next thing that I can start doing is going out on weekends. I have a couple of single buddies, Id like to start going out with them and start approaching women. They would benefit as well. The next thing I can do is join some speed dating events. These can be really good experiences for you as you are practicing talking to girl after girl after girl and you can potentially set up dates that way. I've already gotten laid from one of these speed dating events but it took several months. The next goal is to do the speed dating events and get her to come home with me that night, and if that doesn't work then get her number and set up a date. The next thing I want to do is continue to work out. Do not let your career and workout goals slip because you are doing pickup. They should not interfere with these goals. I want to find a way to balance these different areas of my life. The last thing I'll talk about is masturbating. I want to continue to masturbate but without the use of porn, I will only use my thoughts. This will put more of my attention into my body. I want to really feel into my body when I am having sex. I have read a book called the "multi orgasmic man", which talks about how to have multiple and full body orgasms as a man. I'd like to continue to learn about this, and eventually I want to master it so that I can have sex as long as I want with girls without ejaculating at all. I want to give these women the best sex they have ever had in their lives. This is what will keep them coming back to me. At the end of the day, I want an abundance of sex but I don't have that much time and I also don't want to commit to any one girl. This means that it's imperative that the sex is really really good so that they come back begging for more. I know this will be a long journey, but I am excited for it. I do want to get married one day and have children, but I don't care who that is going to be right now. All I am focused on is growing myself through pickup. I will also be focusing on being a better dance instructor, getting my finances up, and becoming strong and muscular. Good luck.

"Whether you believe you can or not, you're right." ~ Henry Ford A woman wants a guy that knows what he wants and goes for it. This is extremely attractive to the feminine.

Exploring the Feminine Entry #18 Jeremiah 29:11 "For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, "Plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." I trust that God has a plan for me I realize now that I HAVE to get my sexual needs met. Otherwise, this will continue to plague me. Be a player. That is literally what you signed up for. You didn't want to have a girlfriend. You had one, a really great one... But I had to mess it up because I wasn't ready to commit. Now... In order to get sex again I have to start pushing myself and going out more. Start staring people in the eyes. Go out to coffee shops. Have a big vision that you are working towards. Sign up for speed dating events. Go out into the city. Push yourself out of your comfort zone. I am independent of the opinions of others. Masturbate for 20 minutes straight without ejaculating. Masturbate without porn. Be open to being attracted to women. And if you are attracted to her, hit on her. Actually hit on her. You attract what you want to create. It's really that simple.

I used Viagra twice and it completely desensitized by dick, I couldn't feel a thing. But it works very well if you want to last a while and get hard easily.

Purse selfishness Zero integrity

Beautiful artwork

It's important to integrate stage orange before doing serious spiritual work. If you pursue tier two without first becoming wealthy and developing a good work ethic, you're spiritual practices will be half baked. Understand that becoming wealthy is a natural part to a human beings evolution. Pursue money and sex, experience the limitations of both, then transcend into more selfless endeavors.

This is very untrue. Try to extract this limiting belief out of your system. Women are much more attracted to a mans masculine nature, his sense of humor, and his drive. The issue is that you cannot display these traits through a dating app, so a woman has nothing else to go on other than looks, so she picks the most attractive men to match with.

Yes, and it's only 40$

Talking to multiple girls is an emotionally taxing endeavor

That's fair. And you're right, I do not have children.

Interact with as many 9s and 10s that you possibly can. Eventually, you will become numb to their beauty and not be intimidated anymore.

I hate the terminology that you used, but I think I understand the distinction that you're trying to make The "pussy" is like a piece of string, always willing to be swayed and redirected in order to please his girl. The girl is able to play with him like a cat. The "dick" is like a broomstick, solid and stable. He has boundaries, respects his own self worth and his own needs. He cares about his woman deeply but he will not sacrifice these things for her. In conclusion, be a broomstick, not a piece of string.

The best path to take is to get mass experience with lots of girls first. At some point during this journey, you will fall in love with one girl and you'll want to make her your girlfriend. DO NOT game your girlfriend, that is terrible advice. Just love her.

With that attitude, you're right.. you will never find her.

I've been thinking the same thing for years. The best way to deal with pedophiles is with compassion and acceptance and a genuine intention to help. They are human beings just like you and me. As a matter of fact, they are you. And you are them.

Stage yellow The simple act of looking to integrate the lower stages of the spiral is a stage yellow behavior. You are zooming out and then setting your life up accordingly.

I have been thinking recently... Where are we all going? What is the point of this thing called life? We must be going somewhere... The answer to this question lies within the spiral of spiral dynamics. The goal for all of us is to climb up the spiral and fully integrate each stage on the way up. The higher you climb, the closer to God and truth that you get. I want to help my friends move up the spiral. I don't want to manipulate the people within the friend group for my selfish gains, I want to manipulate the entire system, so that they all, individually move up the spiral at their own pace. This requires me to understand where each person is at and what they need to do in order to fully integrate a stage and then transcend it. I will also need to develop myself along the spiral simultaneously so that I can better help them. This plan also requires me to start tapping into stage yellow. In order for me to change a system, I will need to understand how a system works. I am talking about a single human being as a system here, and also the friend group itself as a system, which I will have to understand more clearly in order for there to be real change. I need to first understand where each player is at on the spiral. Do they have any red? Orange? Blue? Green? Any yellow? What does each person embody? What do they enjoy doing? What are they working on or need to work on? (I am not using their real names for privacy) For reference, we are all about 27 / 28 years old right now. Listed below are the main players within the friend group. There is a hierarchy to this. I am going to put Pablo at the top. He hosts the most, is very close with all of the top players of the friend group. I would consider myself his right hand man. (its possible that I am being biased here, I will try to more consciously look at this matter) I am the best at schmoozing with everyone. I am the closest with the people at the bottom of the friend group. He is closest with the people at the top. My role is to make them feel included. His role is to plan and organize things. I trigger stage green empathy and stage orange charisma for this, he triggers stage orange planning and also has the best sense of humor, probably also a stage orange trait. Pablo - Has fully integrated red at a young age. He got into a fight in high school while standing up for what he believed was right, and has had several altercations with authority figures in which he was standing up for what he believed in. I feel safe while he is around. Has integrated blue very nicely as well, he has strong family values, strong loyalty, has self-discipline (although could maybe use a little work), he does tend to engage in "white lies" but he has improved upon this over the years. (White lies show lack of empathy and a willingness to manipulate other people) Has not fully integrated orange yet, he does have a house, a nice car, and seems to be well off. But he is still a penny pincher. This means that he is not living in abundance with his finances. Its as if he has been stagnant financially ever since he bought his house a couple of years ago. Green - Not a big hugger, eye contact is good. Has never done yoga. Does not eat healthy. Does show empathy towards others, but mainly kids, women, and the elderly. Struggles to give out love and empathy towards other men. Summary on Pablo: Seems to have nicely integrated red and blue and is done with those two. He is now stagnant at orange, needs to work that out. Honestly, I think that getting him to dive right into green would be very beneficial to him. Get him to a yoga class. That's the first step. Myself - Red- Has not fully integrated red yet. He is still small, has not worked out enough to build real muscles. Does not always say how he feels so that he will get approval from other people. Blue - Has not fully integrated blue either - Work ethic and self - discipline are not great. Is fairly loyal towards his friends and family. Orange - is not financially independent, is in credit card debt, does not have a house or even an apartment, does not have a serious girlfriend or a nice car. Green - Has integrated green nicely. Was a vegan for 2.5 years. Goes to yoga. Eats healthy food. Has done psychedelics. Gives out a fair amount of hugs. Is triggered by ugly stage red antics, such as animal abuse and racial inequality. Yellow - Has ambitions to integrate yellow's systems thinking, but I'd say does that have any integration of yellow just yet. Summary of myself: Although I have a lot of work to do on the red/blue/orange front. While I am working out those kinks, I will be able to simultaneously show my friends what stage green is all about - I want to get them to engage in these activities, such as hiking, yoga, healthy food, psychedelics, and being more loving towards others. Ant - Red - I know that in his rugby days in college and football days before that, he must have had to trigger red at times. I also know that he would have these crazy drinking and fighting competitions in college at his rugby parties. This screams red to me. I know he has also kicked people out of his parties in college, is also a big dude, definitely worked out for a while in his hay day. He shoved one of our other friends to the ground one time for "crossing a line" - It was controversial, but this shows that he is willing to trigger red and assert his dominance. (this was like 4 years ago) I think he's fully integrated red and transcended it. Blue - Has to wake up every morning at the same time. Has good loyalty and good family values. Orange - does have a house, a nice car, has fixed up the house, makes good money, shows good charisma, Green - Does have a good amount of green. Uses the word love a lot. Asks me if I need a hug sometimes. (I never do that) Is very caring and empathetic to the feelings of his friends, although I do notice that he misses the cues of his girlfriend when she is upset. Has never gone to yoga. Eats somewhat healthy. Drinks kombucha sometimes. Does still drink alcohol a lot. Summary for Ant: He seems very well integrated on all fronts. Am I missing something or is he ready to start moving over to yellow? He actually may have integrated more green than myself. I am unsure how to handle him. Paco - Definitely some red. His fighting history and interest in the UFC and the WWE is evidence of this. Does he have enough red? Yes. Does he have enough blue? No. I think he could use an increase in his self-discipline and work ethic. He is inconsistent and tends to slack off, not wake up on time. He is lazy in soccer, does not get back on defense, which is evidence towards not being a team player. Does he have enough orange? No. He is living with his parents right now and therefore not financially independent. He has orange-like traits in his money grabbing and ego-centric ways. His charisma and strategic thinking could use some work. Does not have very much green. Not that into hugging and is just very eco centered. He cares about his friends and loved ones, but doesn't care about strangers. Not very accepting of the transgender community. Still uses homophobic slurs. Summary - He is way too ego centric. He will have to integrate the more communal and loving stages of blue and green. If I can introduce him to stage green more, I think that will go a long way. Hug more, invite him to yoga, etc. Overall summary: Several other people within the friend group will need to be analyzed, but this is a good start. What can I do right now to help these folks? Get them to go to yoga with you. Or go on a hike, be more loving, flash green in front of them, get your hands on some psychedelics.

This song is a masterpiece It's about a young man growing up in Compton, California, a stage red environment. It's very dangerous. Everyone is struggling just to survive. At the end of the song, there is a skit in which the young man is angry and holding a gun. The wise mother talks him down and points him to the direction of God. The young man calms down and starts to pray. This is the transcendence of red to blue. Skit Son: Fuck, I'm tired of fuckin running... Mother: Young man, come talk to me... Is that what I think that is (looking at the gun in her son's hand)... I know that's not what I think that is. Why are you so angry? See you young men are dying of thirst. Do you know what that means? That means, you need water, holy water. You need to be baptized with the spirit of the lord. Do you want to receive God as your personal savior? Okay repeat after me... Everyone: Lord god, I come to you a sinner. And I humbly repent for my sins. I Believe that Jesus is lord. I believe you raised him from the dead. I will ask that Jesus come into my life to be my lord and savior. I receive Jesus to take control of my life. And that I may live for him from this day forward. Thank you lord Jesus for saving me with your precious blood. In Jesus' name, Amen. Mother: Alright now, remember this day. The start of a new life. Your real life. Think about this from the young mans perspective The young man sees death all around him, his friends and family have died from gang violence, all he knows is survival, survival at all cost. He is capable of love, but his own survival comes first, he has to be selfish in order to survive, very selfish. Now his mother comes to him and offers a different path, the path of God. The young man decides to put his faith into God, he intuits that there is something to this religion thing. It makes him feel good about his situation.