Spiritual Warrior

Spiritual Autolysis Journal Entry #62 - Mar 16, 2025 5:37 PM Higher self: Alright lower self, what's on the agenda today? Lower self: It is true that emptiness is all that there is. Higher self: What is emptiness? Lower self: Emptiness is a vast space that goes on for infinity. There is nothing in it, it's just an endless orb of silence. Higher self: What about sound? There is sound in the world around you why wouldn't there be sound within this empty void. And aren't we inside of the empty void? Lower self: When did I say there was sound in this world? And to what world are you even referring? Higher self: You hear sound though, you experience sound. Lower self: No I don't. What is it? Explain it to me. Higher self: Sound is... Hmmm... I don't know what sound is. Or I just don't know how to explain it. ----------------------------------------------------------------- Higher self: Does this orb of silence have structure? Lowers self: It is endless so there is no structure. Higher self: How can something have no structure? Doesn't everything have a molecular structure to it? Lower self: What makes a structure molecular? And what is a structure anyways? Higher self: A structure is something that makes a thing concrete, it makes it tangible, so that it can be measured. Does anything not have structure? Lower self: Yes, infinity goes on forever and ever, it has no end, no bottom and no top. Therefore it is without structure. Higher self: But you said that infinity is Truth and that Truth is something that is concrete and true without any doubt. Therefore, if structure is something that is concrete then how can infinity have any structure to it? But then again infinity is Truth and truth is something that is concrete which means that it does have structure. So it has structure and it doesn't have structure. How do we rectify that? Lower self: What is true then? Is infinity structureless? And you are infinity correct? Higher self: What makes me infinite? Lower self: You have no self, this has already been established. The idea of Ben is a concept, it is imaginary. Your entire world is imaginary. Higher self: Then why is there pain? Pain feels very real. Lower self: Pain is not real, it is something that you have made up. Survival is something that is made up. Your entire world is made up. Higher self: But who made it up? Lower self: You did. Higher self: How do you know all of this? Lower self: Because you are infinity. This is what an infinite being would do. It would make things up because it goes on forever and ever. Higher self: But how do I know that I am infinity. What makes it so that I am part of infinity? Why can't I be apart from infinity? Why do they have to be one and the same? Lower self: Because the self image that you have created for yourself. IS NOT REAL. It is NOT Truth. Infinity is truth. Not let's move towards infinity.

Ultimately the self and life are limited forms of Absolute Consciousness - there is no difference between Consciousness, self, mind, or pizza. Turns out it's all Nothing, and the self is Being. It is all a manifestation of the very Consciousness that is realized in enlightenment. A self, however, is designed to live and die in complete ignorance of this Truth. But it doesn't have to stay that way. - from Pursuing Consciousness page 289

How are you? Perfect, thank you. I'm traveling incognito. Oh? As what are you disguised? I am disguised as myself. Don't be silly. That's no disguise. That's what you are. On the contrary, it must be a very good disguise, for I see it has fooled you completely. ~ Sufu Mullah Nasrudin

Honest communication, express exactly what you are thinking and feeling. No manipulation tactics.

Here's some mind blowing advice... work on both

Substitute teacher and ballroom dance instructor

"We are enslaved by anything we do not consciously see. We are freed by conscious perception." ~ Vernon Howard

Very true. Then it's a question of does the human want to bring things into his or her conscious awareness. Does he really want to face the truth?

Your parents are willingly causing pain to another creature so that it will "taste better" for them. This is very selfish behavior. The universe does not reward selfishness, this will hurt them spiritually.

The Ego I find the ego disgusting because it lies and cheats and steals in order to get what it wants. Honest communication is not in the egos best interest. It manipulates others and it's environment in order to survive. This act of manipulating is very obvious in primal animals, such as crocodiles. A crocodile will hide underwater, deceiving it's prey that it is not there. Then when the prey is too close to the water to get out of the way, the crocodile springs up from the water and drags its prey underwater until it drowns. However, in human beings the act of manipulation in order to survive is a little bit different. A human not only has to survive in a physical sense and take care of it's body, it also has to maintain the self image that it has concocted, unconsciously I might add, towards itself. When I was a kid, part of my self image was that everybody liked me. As soon as I felt like someone didn't like me, I woul be triggered by a slew of negative emotions, I'd get angry and frustrated and upset. It felt like the end of the world because to the part of myself that believes that he is liked by everybody, this was the end of its world. That part of me cannot stay intact if I experience it to not be true.

The Enlightened Path I am going down a road that no one goes down. I say this because if I didn't think of the enlightened path as something that few people attain, then I wouldn't pursue it. The fact that it is so rare makes it all the more alluring. I am going to be a person that no longer has images of himself attaining any ego-driven goal. All goals from here on out will be for the betterment of other. Let's just start there. This means no goals of seeing your face next to the most beautiful woman, or seeing yourself dancing attractively on a screen, or your face on Instagram with a bunch of medals for winning dance competitions. All goals have to be about other. Your ego, your self does not exist. Therefore, it does not need to be fed. You have been feeding it like a fat disgusting pig all your life. It is full enough to survive for weeks. It wants to puke everything up. The way the ego acts is disgusting. Selfish and maniacal.

"Out beyond ideas of wrongdoing and right doing there is a field. I'll meet you there." - Rumi

It sounds like you died