Spiritual Warrior

3.3.26 Morning Routine: Make bed: 0 Journal: 121 Brush teeth streak: 121 Floss streak: 0 Shower streak: 95 Meditation streak: 2 Approaching women visualization: 0 Abundance of sex affirmation: 0 Funniness affirmation: 2 Independent of opinions of others affirmation: 2 Free talk exercise: 2 Night time routine goals: Brush teeth streak: 3 Wash face streak: 3 No electronics before bed: 0 "Whole day" goals: No ejaculation streak: 0 Eat 150 g of protein streak: 0 No alcohol streak: 123 Total number of women cold approached: 5

You right

Appreciate the candidness. You're right, this is low conscious behavior - not something that I want to be a part of.

Personal Journal ~ 3.3.26 Okay so I am feeling frustrated right now with my lack of discipline. Before I start down the rabbit hole of everything thats wrong with me right now, lets highlight some things that I have been doing well recently. Some highlights: I’ve been able to tap into a newfound masculine aura in which I don’t care what others think and I go after what I want - right now I am experiencing the first level of this, I can tell that there are layers to this work right here and I am only scratching the surface I reached 72 days of not smoking weed I’ve completely given up alcohol, reaching over 100 days straight without it I am a lot more organized in my daily life, my room is never as messy as it used to be I have been journaling every day for 100+ days straight I am becoming noticeably better at teaching dance as well as dancing. My lesson count results haven’t really shown that but I am starting to think more long term as the lesson counts will grow in the near future I have 3 to 5 very solid students that I see long term commitment with. It would take something catastrophic for them to leave I am starting to have a much better grasp over my student base and I am pushing them to come in more Creativity is blossoming as my choreography has been getting better and better I have approached 5 women in the past month, 4 of them at a nightclub and another one at a CVS. In this process, I have been going out with one of the girls on a consistent basis for the past couple of weeks, the next step is to create some intimacy with her - I am also debating whether or not to tell her before I have sex with her that I am not looking for anything serious I have a newfound vision to become a highly conscious pick up artist that shares insights with people on YouTube I have a vision of becoming a world champion dancer, this has motivated me greatly and it is probably the only thing in my life that I am sure about without any doubt in my mind. I admitted that I started to have romantic feelings towards my dance partner. This was a very fulfilling and emotionally challenging event and I am super proud that I was able to do it 28 days without ejaculating Some areas to work on: I want to start getting out of bed as soon as I wake up and start my day. I have to realize that I have all of these goals that I would love to actualize in my life so lets get fuckin’ to it. Stop wasting time. What do I waste time doing? Sleeping. Scrolling on YouTube and Instagram and Spotify. Okay, lets stop. Just stop. Do you want to cut these things out completely? Yes. Yes I do. The biggest problem right now is just that I don’t have any control over my life. I don’t run my schedule. I don’t understand how I’m doing with my habits. I don’t know why I’m even doing the habits. I understand my vision but I don’t have the practical things taken care of, such as finances and daily habits and room cleanliness and car cleanliness. Getting these things handles would do absolute wonders for my mental health and success in general. The thing that I notice the most is I have all of these cravings, a craving to listen to a song, a craving to watch a video, a craving to scroll, a craving to check my messages or my email, it is exhausting. I want to start putting awareness on all of these urges so that I can take control of the situation. How does my financial situation look? What am I going to do about that? I don’t know - that side of things feel so fuckin’ overhwhelming - which is why you need to get on it and take some responsibility over it. Go to a financial institution if you have to. Okay, I have to go to work, going to have to come back to this later.

Thanks for the reply. I enjoy your flexible view on the matter. We as humans are free to do as we please. There are no cosmic consequences to our actions, or at least not that I'm aware of.

I've gone on two dates with a girl and she is very into me, all I have to do is set up the logistics and this will lead us to an intimate experience with each other. I am NOT looking for something serious right now as I want to date around with multiple women and I also don't see a future with her. I intuit that the right thing to do here is to let her know that I am not looking to turn this into a serious relationship as this is how I would like to be treated if the roles were reversed. The issue with this is if I tell the girl this before sex then I might not get the sex. Now you might think that I'm cold and crass for allowing myself to think like this, but I think a vast majority of us men have this exact thought, we are just unaware of it or will not admit it to others. I am doing the opposite, I am highlighting my own selfishness as highly conscious people are built on the foundation of brute honesty and truth, even if and especially if it paints you in a negative light. I know what the right thing to do is... the question is... will I actually do it? The fact that I am contemplating this and am not gung ho about it shows to me how selfish and biased I am. I just said that this is what I would want from the girl, yet I'm not going to give her the same courtesy? Double standards at its finest out of pure selfishness. Fuck that - I am going to tell her before having sex with her. This is the highly conscious and truthful way to go about it. I want to be a player in order to become an attractive man but I would like to do it in a highly conscious way - I have much to learn but this is a good start. I am going to seduce this woman while being COMPLETELY truthful and honest with her. And if it doesn't work out because of that I can sleep well tonight knowing that I did the right thing. Curious as to what ya'll think. Feel free to share opinions.

Give her space, that is the best thing for her right now You cannot heal her wounds, only time will

Habits & Disciplines Journey Entry #121 I feel like no woman wants me romantically. What a shitty feeling for a man to go through. But in reality, I have a woman that is very into me right now, I had a woman a year ago that was very into me, that wanted to marry me. So thats not really true. MY mind just likes to make myself feel pity for myself. Why does it do that? And how do I deal with it? What is the truth about these thoughts of "No one wants me romantically?" Well it firstly stems from the women that I work with. I don't understand why neither of the girls that I like show any interest in me, I have shown a great drive and work ethic, I am a good looking guy, what is missing? I don't understand and it is incredibly frustrating. Of course, from their perspective, I have shown no interest in them.. well thats not entirely true, I've actually told both of them that I like them, one of them two years ago and the other one a couple of days ago. And of course now they are going out to breakfast together and they are probably going to talk about me crushing on one of them. The reality is that I would actually date either of them, whichever one will take me... honestly thats how I feel. That sounds really sad, its unfortunate that this is the position that I am in. In reality I just don't have an abundance of high quality women that I am talking to and coming into contact with, which makes me desperate to hang onto whoever will take me. This NEEDS to change, I am not happy with my current reality in this regard. The real solution here is to just go ape shit on approaching women outside of this place and to get everything figured out, finances, work ethic, habits and disciplines, do all of this stuff by yourself, for yourself and things will fall into place. But how do you know that? I don't. I truly don't, but hey lets try it. The main thing thats frustrating me right now is I am always lazy as fuck when I wake up in the morning. So like this morning, I actually woke up at 6:30 am. I wanted to wake up at 7:30 so this is an hour early. Ideally, I get my ass out of bed and get in the shower, then meditate, which would actually bring me to 7:30 am in which I've already completed my first two tasks for the day. This would be fuckin' awesome. However, that is not what happened. Instead, I layed in bed for a while an then when my 7:30 alarm went off, I didn't want to wake up so I laid there for another hour, now its 8:30, I walk downstairs and then I lay on the couch in the living room for another hour lmao, and all of a sudden, it is 3 hours later... fuck me. And now I have to get all of my habits done in the morning and I am no longer focused on them because I am in a lazy mindset, one that wants to go back to bed. Action item: Tomorrow I am going to get out of bed AS SOON AS I WAKE UP or the alarm sounds, whichever comes first. You need to add some adversity to your life. I am going to fuckin' do this. I am going to fuckin' do this. Just like I am going to get amazing results with women, having lots of sex, helping young men approach and improve their dating lives, I am going to be an incredible dancer that wins dance competitions, and I am going to be one of the most highly conscious human beings on this planet. Namaste. 3.2.26 Morning Routine: Make bed: 0 Journal: 120 Brush teeth streak: 120 Floss streak: 0 Shower streak: 94 Meditation streak: 1 Approaching women visualization: 1 Abundance of sex affirmation: 1 Funniness affirmation: 1 Independent of opinions of others affirmation: 1 Free talk exercise: 1 Night time routine goals: Brush teeth streak: 2 Wash face streak: 2 No electronics before bed: 0 "Whole day" goals: No ejaculation streak: 28 Eat 150 g of protein streak: 0 No alcohol streak: 122 No smoking weed streak: 1 Total number of women cold approached: 5

Habits & Disciplines Journey Entry #120 3.1.26 Morning Routine: Make bed: 0 Journal: 119 Brush teeth streak: 119 Floss streak: 0 Shower streak: 93 Meditation streak: 0 Approaching women visualization: 0 Abundance of sex affirmation: 0 Funniness affirmation: 0 Independent of opinions of others affirmation: 0 Free talk exercise: 0 Night time routine goals: Brush teeth streak: 1 Wash face streak: 1 No electronics before bed: 1 "Whole day" goals: No ejaculation streak: 27 Eat 150 g of protein streak: 0 No alcohol streak: 121 No smoking weed streak: 0 Total number of women cold approached: 5

Hi, I'm a ballroom dance instructor so I have lots of experience in these dance setting, salsa clubs, ballroom events, etc. Yes, you're right bachata can be a very sensual dance. From my experience, despite how sensual it can get, its just a dance, there isn't anything past that. You enjoy a dance with another human being, you give them a high five or a hug at the end of it and then you move onto the next partner. This is how most of the people feel that are immersed in the dance culture. When you are new to it, it does seem overwhelming and maybe even wrong but again, it's just a dance, you get used to it.

Interlude: I am not a lyricist, I am just a bastard child, here to experiment I want to start taking my life more seriously mainly on the spiritual front. I am all set up to be a successful dancer and dance instructor. All of that will fall into place, as well as my intimate relationship, this all has its place and I can let go and coast off of the foundation that I have built. Where I need a conscious push is in my spiritual pursuit. I am not taking this seriously and I am in a place in which I have so much damn potential. I understand what it means to be enlightened on a conceptual level, which is a rare thing. I understand that a human being increases his level of consciousness in stages. I understand that it is going to take an experimental shift towards the Truth. I can also feel that something is off in my life right now, I see that everything that I am doing is shallow, it lacks meaning. More important to this I might add is how on earth do you know what to pursue when you don't know what the Truth about reality entails? You have it ass backwards.. you are right now pursuing things without knowing how everything works. But how could I understanding everything, is that even possible? I don't know but I'm willing to put in the work to find out.

Interlude: Move on Beginnings always hide themselves in ends. Truthfully, I've been feeling very sluggish recently and I have no one to hang out with on the weekends. This is sad to me as I used to have a girlfriend that I could always kick it with. I need new friends to go out with, I need a new life. I am sick of the life that I've been living. But what do I want? I want to be disciplined and meditate every day. I want to be clear headed. I want to be able to approach any woman out there in the wild and call her beautiful. I want to keep going down this path of self mastery and self discovery, no breaks, no more getting off. Continue to push yourself out of your comfort zone, even when you don't want to, especially when you don't want to. We are all rooting for you. Attract anything and everything that you want into your life. Only you have the power to do this. I am going to become a famous and very important figure within the dance community. I am going to inspire others, old and young to maximize their full potential and to be fully creative and expressive and hard working in their endeavors. Never settle. Always continue down your path until you reach the end. I am the greatest thing to happen to this studio. I teach 30 lessons a week. I win every dance competition that I enter. I have an amazing girlfriend that loves and takes care of me. I have a magnetic masculine presence that women cannot get enough of. I am also humble and quiet when I need to be. I am amazing at sex, able to last for hours without cumming while my girl cums over and over and over again. I have a nice house that is totally paid off. I make millions of dollars doing the one thing that I love, dancing. I am an emotioanlly mature person that does not get effected easily by the opinions of others. I am emotionally sound and grounded, able to handle life's challenges with calm and ease. I read lots of books in my spare time, creating a wealth of knowledge within my brain. I am disciplined, when I say I'm going to wake up at a certain time, you can be dammned sure I'm waking up at that time. I am the man who knocks. I am the guy that your attention should be on. I command attention. I dominate situations when I need to. At the same time, I am capable of completely shutting off my brain. I am organized and ready for war when I am called upon. My car is clean and I am ready for anything.

Habits & Disciplines Journey Entry #118 I had an interesting morning yesterday. I finally admitted to my dance partner that I have feelings for her, but the way that I framed it (in order to protect myself) was that it is not ideal because she used to date my friend and I would ideally like a dance partner that I am not romantic with. I told her that I feel bad for having the feelings towards her because of my friend but at the same time I can't control how I feel. She said she appreciated me telling her that and that she still has feelings for her ex, who is my friend. So basically she does not see me like that and it is partially because she still has feelings for her ex. I am very proud of myself for finally having the difficult conversation with her. Now, where do I go from here? Right now I am feeling very vulnerable and hurt, as if I just opened up a wound and now it is susceptible to infection and salt being thrown into it. At the same time I do feel free, as if a huge weight has been lifted off of my chest. I can now hit on any woman that I want without having to give her a second thought. For a while I didn't want to hit on others "out of respect" for her which was rather silly in hindsight, but I guess I was being empathetic in a way. I will bring up memories that I have with this girl that are very memorable to me and she barely even remembers them. This honestly says a lot. I kind of hate this girl right now, I also think that she doesn't deserve me liking her, she is all over the place, she's not really that caring, yeah I fuckin' hate her right now... Why do I have to like her... she didn't deserve to have her ego built up. When all of this went down, thats how it felt, it felt like I was building her ego up while tearing my own ego down. But at the same time, this vulnerability is what it takes in the dating world and you're going to have to get used to it so it is a good growth experience. So yeah I'll probably hate her for a little while even though she doesn't deserve it. My ultimate goal however is to deal with this with "dispassion" and "detachment" in which my emotions are not swayed either way, I am centered and grounded. But in reality, I do feel jaded after this incident and I wish I didn't give her the fulfillment of having someone like her. I gave her the satisfaction of knowing that someone finds her attractive and is interested in exploring the romantic side of things, this must have stroked her ego. It just kind of pisses me off that I did that for her while my ego takes a hit because she doesn't feel the same way about me. I'm so sick of all of these fuckin' girls in the studio that I dance with. Maybe I need new dance partners. They're so fuckin' annoying because I always end up liking them, but I keep getting rejected. Its such bullshit. I don't want to dance with any of them anymore. I want to be done with it. At the same time, it is great having a competitive partner and its great having someone to work on "certification" with so I am either going to have to find a way to deal with this emotionally or maybe I could have a guy as a "certification" partner from now on. But of course, I have learned that in general, avoidance is not the answer so you should probably just stick to what you are doing. It takes a certain type of girl for me to get attracted. Unfortunately the types of girls that I am attracted to are my two dance partners. I've had other dance partners before in which I wasn't attracted to them, that was much easier because there wasn't an underlying "I want to fuck you" within our interactions. This is the problem, because I will become frustrated that I am not fucking them and I feel unwanted and undesired because they don't want to fuck me. Side note: Foxtrot Explosion move is left foot forward, right foot forward, then left foot forward, then right foot back, then you get into the the "run around" part - such a cool move! Another thing that I am realizing is that I am far too selfish. I thought that I was more conscious than I actually am, but in reality I am a big old hypocrite that only cares about himself and that can't even meditate every day for one week. This is going to be a transition period for me as I continue to navigate the dating field. I would also really like to start getting back into spirituality as I have been learning that I want to fulfill my duties in the LOC 400s area in which I start to use my mind to catapult myself into material success. This requires my mind to be clear and focused on my goals. It requires discipline and execution. By the end of that journey, I will be ready and willing to transcend into the LOCS 500 and beyond. I also want to start taking The Book of Not Knowing more seriously as I love learning more about Truth work. Also, continue to work on emotional mastery while you're at work and your dealings with dance partners and women that you are dating. In terms of dating, you are now approaching girls occasionally, you have one woman that you're talking to, and another girl messaged you on IG saying that she wants to hang out in a group setting. That honestly sounds great, but do I want to put the effort in and set that up? Not sure. I want to be talking to at least 5 different girls at once. That is truly what I want. I want to have such an abundance of women at my fingertips that I am completely numb to losing any one girl. I can see that this M.O. is going to get old real quick, but I believe that I have to go through a stage like that in order to practice and understand what it takes to seduce women. That is the skill that I am currently lacking. I have heard that the more women that you sleep with, the more desensitized you become to the romantic side of things. This is an unfortunate truth of the dating field. Right now, I love the romantic side of life, being in that honeymoon phase with a girl that you feel you're destined to be with in this moment is such an amazing feeling. However, I look forward to turning into "Darth Vader" in which I am going to fuck a bunch of girls. I am partially doing this because I'm mad at all the women that have hurt me. I am, I'm really mad at them. Just like many women are probably really mad at all of the men that have hurt them, its the same shit. 2.27.26 Morning Routine: Make bed: 0 Journal: 117 Brush teeth streak: 117 Floss streak: 0 Shower streak: 91 Meditation streak: 0 Approaching women visualization: 0 Abundance of sex affirmation: 0 Funniness affirmation: 4 Independent of opinions of others affirmation: 4 Free talk exercise: 4 Night time routine goals: Brush teeth streak: 0 Wash face streak: 0 No electronics before bed: 0 "Whole day" goals: No ejaculation streak: 25 Eat 150 g of protein streak: 1 No alcohol streak: 119 No smoking weed streak: 74 Total number of women cold approached: 5 Habits & Disciplines Journey Entry #119 2.28.26 Morning Routine: Make bed: 0 Journal: 118 Brush teeth streak: 118 Floss streak: 0 Shower streak: 92 Meditation streak: 0 Approaching women visualization: 0 Abundance of sex affirmation: 0 Funniness affirmation: 0 Independent of opinions of others affirmation: 0 Free talk exercise: 0 Night time routine goals: Brush teeth streak: 0 Wash face streak: 0 No electronics before bed: 0 "Whole day" goals: No ejaculation streak: 26 Eat 150 g of protein streak: 0 No alcohol streak: 120 No smoking weed streak: 0 Total number of women cold approached: 5

Interlude: I will never be depressed I just watched a video of Connor McGregor saying that he is fighting with depression every day. This is a man that is one of the most widely known and most famous UFC fighters ever to step foot in the octagon. He has more money than he needs, has an amazing wife, and is a master in his field. Now why is he depressed in his years of retirement? Because he never transcended out of stage orange in the spiral dynamics ladder. He wants to continue to produce at a high level and kick people's asses but he is out of his prime, his body will not allow him to compete in that way anymore. The cool thing about myself is I know for a fact that I will never be depressed by life because I understand the trajectory of things based on my understanding of spiral dynamics as well as Ramaji's level of consciousness map. So sometimes I question why I spent so much time in my early 20s reading about spirituality when I should have been chasing girls and developing a career, but it is this foundational knowledge that has given me such an eagle's eye scope of reality. This understanding allows me to not be bothered by tiny things in day to day life because my life has an overarching trajectory and my overall goal is to just let go and enjoy the ride. And this is not some wishful thinking bullshit, this is me touching the spiritual side of life, the letting go side of life, the surrendering to the cosmos side of life.

Habits & Disciplines Journey Entry #117 2.26.26 Morning Routine: Make bed: 0 Journal: 116 Brush teeth streak: 116 Floss streak: 0 Shower streak: 90 Meditation streak: 4 Approaching women visualization: 0 Abundance of sex affirmation: 0 Funniness affirmation: 3 Independent of opinions of others affirmation: 3 Free talk exercise: 3 Night time routine goals: Brush teeth streak: 4 Wash face streak: 4 No electronics before bed: 0 "Whole day" goals: No ejaculation streak: 24 Eat 150 g of protein streak: 0 No alcohol streak: 118 No smoking weed streak: 73 Total number of women cold approached: 5