Whitney Edwards

Woke up early morning today. And I feel like I need to attend to some things. Feels heavy.

I found an excellent way of avoiding the forum.

Recipe for dehydration.

Alexander Grace talks about being silent if you caught your gf cheating on you. Do you think it's possible to do that and what are your thoughts on girls cheating on their boyfriends?

I need to work extra hard for the next couple of days.

I need lots and lots of rest. I feel like I'll faint. Nothing feels good. Other than my husband. I have been so exhausted. I just don't like anything. Certain things are just depressing.

I'll stay off the forum completely and block all notifications. I'm fed up with certain things. They are disturbing.

My sister needs to help me out about certain things.

I'm so uncomfortable right now. I don't like anything about the forum right now. It feels dull, the same boring debates. What did i get.

Be away from traffic lol.

He gets a lot of views and comments.

A good diet also needs a lot of money. I mean it's not easy. All the healthiest choices. Plus discipline which I don't have. Maybe some day I get there.

I like my new name — malicious moth. So funny and cute and malicious at the same time. Ahhhhh. I want to be in the mountains, away from humanity and all the

We are omnivores. We need both plants and animals. This is so simple.

I have a problem with impulsivity. I make decisions in seconds and regret later. Sometimes I lose money or friends because of that. I get a thought or feeling and I immediately jump to act on it. If you have been impulsive what has worked for you to stop being like that?

Woke up early this morning and then fell asleep again. Yesterday evening I had decided that I will do a task which I had been putting off for days and I got it done. Feels so freeing a bit. Today I will definitely ask my sister about certain things. I have my passport work coming up. I need to do it diligently. This year has begun well.

Golden.

The yellow one is you. The red one is me.

To be brutally frank I was shamed right on this forum and I found it brutal and pathetic. The person came directly at me and insulted me. I won't name them. But they are also on this thread. They are still throwing insults around and I don't like their overly judgemental and condescending and moral superiority tone. If you use your intuition you can find them on this thread. I just dislike that approach. Nobody likes animal cruelty and some people don't take a strong stance, I get it. But this person assumes they are intellectually and morally great and others are fools. Somebody needs to call him out, maybe vegans? Ever since the shaming, I feel a bit guilty and uncomfortable while eating chicken because I am constantly reminded of the shaming. This is toxic shame and what I'm suffering is toxic guilt that I don't deserve to suffer. So when I watched the video, it suddenly clicked. This is not a click bait provocative video by any means. It's a real phenomenon. Most vegans think and erroneously assume that they aren't shaming others. But it takes only one hyper vigilant Vegan to get the job done. Like in the video. I myself didn't realize over the years that this could be a major problem. I used to assume that non-vegans blow it out of proportion. Until it hit home. When I was personally shamed, I felt awful and insulted and just like... I don't know... How to even say this... I mean.. I felt like I'm a criminal... It's shocking what the shaming can do to one's humanity... It's traumatic and soul crushing.... I used to enjoy eating chicken so much, it's my favorite. And having the vegan (I don't even know if he is vegan but he has a strong stance on veganism and he throws insults like in this thread he is calling everyone a bunch of clowns with zero intellectual integrity, it's awful) rub it directly into my face on a previous occasion sent me into a self-guilt toxic shame spiral. I felt bad like I'm some awful person when I'm not. I care about animals too. But I can't help my diet. I want a full diet and I want to eat something that fulfills me without feeling shame.. And even if I said that I enjoy, there's nothing wrong in enjoying the food you eat. I don't have to give ambiguous explanations to why I'm eating what I am, to supposedly apologize to vegans and act like "yes I care about animals but you see I'm eating for bla bla bla reasons...." no I don't need to do that either. I can be unapologetic if I want to. Those reasons aren't necessary to satisfy my conscience or their ego. I don't need a blemish thrown at my conscience to begin with. I eat with a clean conscience and why not. It's my fundamental right to survival and nobody should have the right to shame my survival no matter how unethical they view it. I'm not robbing a bank or stealing someone's grandfather's land to sit in guilt. This shaming is ridiculous. I'm simply eating. And eating is a basic and fundamental human right. These people act like I'm eating someone's child, the guy in the video even equated animals to children, this is beyond bizarre. I was shamed, maybe it doesn't appear a lot to that person or other people on the forum, but personally it harmed me badly. To the point I have trouble eating meat. Now this is real issue that I've only begun to experience once it happened to me. I know now and understand why people view vegans negatively and why such an uproar against vegans exists on YouTube and the internet. It makes sense. Maybe they were shamed too in similar ways? Then their outrage is perfectly legit. It feels like being encroached upon on our fundamental right to eat what we want to eat and what feels healthy to us. Yes as non-vegans we are aware of the slaughter industry and the animal cruelty issue, we aren't ignorant clowns and buffoons trying to outrage vegans. We are just simple people and doing things that people did for thousands of years. Shaming is not the way to make a point, maybe there are other solutions that might come up in the future to reach a middle ground. But if such problematic (I will call them problematic because they shame non vegans) vegans continue to do what they are doing, the whole veganism movement will suffer badly and get ridiculed and probably not set out to achieve whatever they want. Their failure or success is not my concern to be honest, but their tactic is. It's not fair to use this tactic, I don't know why they assume it will work. If it has worked and some people converted to vegan, then it's no different than cult or religious abuse, because religious people use similar moral shaming tactics for conversion. I think I can care about animal cruelty in other ways too. Like not wanting elephants to be used in circus or monkeys treated brutally in Thailand for tourist pleasure. Or pets being abandoned in America every year. Or crocodile farming for Hermes handbags which is absolutely absolutely cruel. And a luxury vanity dumbfuck handbag is not basic survival so the luxury company Hermès needs a serious banning. Issues like that. I even put the person on my ignore list to not have to read their comments. But it's still triggering. By the way, I was a vegan especially for ethical reasons. I tried being a strict vegan for a year and then I gave up because my weight dropped and I began experiencing some health issues. After that I switched back to eating meat again and those problems went away. I feel much better now and I regularly consume chicken as usual.. I just don't want to eat it with guilt. Because that won't be healthy for my mental health. This thread is both for personal reasons as well as to raise awareness about how vegans shaming non vegans is quite harmful mentally and not to be taken lightly and why people critiquing their approach on the internet, YouTube are actually legitimate in their frustration. It looks like I wrote this post out of anger, but realistically it's out of deep frustration.

This is the perfect utopian reality I had dreamed of. Wtf.