Whitney Edwards

We're awtistic. Fantastic.

True true. Whatever scant little experience I've ever had, I've generally (in my observation that is), found that women who are mostly on social media like Instagram, Tik Tok use male friends only (or mostly) for attention and likes. All my friends too. And then they dump them. It makes it difficult for men to make sense of it or give any human value to this recurrent experience, it's like "don't take women seriously anymore." it's what my friends regularly tell me. You have to know how men feel about it. Just my two cents. But you could be looking for genuine friendships, ya know.

Does my experience seriously count though? I'm in my 20s, had a recent breakup, didn't have many relationships, no marriage obviously. No "extremely" long LTRs either lol, none. I didn't play the experience card at all, neither can I play it in my position. So I'm not supposed to give advice? Are you being serious with that statement? Fine I'll take it and not give you any further advice. Seems you know more than I do. Can you please explain why experience is relevant? I didn't get that lol. Isn't having too little experience actually a good track record lol? Am I missing something? Please enlightennn me if you can.

@eos_nyxia in response to your last post- (There's a slight problem when you automatically assume that friendship between men and women should exist without baggage). Talk about projecting on my life lol. Well frankly I didn't expect anything better. It seems you become livid if something doesn't go according to your way/opinion. When you open a thread and include personal details, people are going to be having all sorts of opinions. I offered a male perspective which you aren't completely open to and that is that friendship between men and women is not an easy deal especially for the man. If you want changes in your life, first and foremost comes through self reflection. If your rhetoric in your life is to lash out at someone trying to offer a narrative different from yours, then keep expecting the results you have always been getting. Nothing more to say to you. Just telling you the truth about male female friendship. You don't need to take it personally though. It seems you're taking random opinions way too personally. Maybe this is the energy most of your male companions are picking from you, so try to work on that, especially when you say they walk away from you for no apparent reason. This is the last I'll respond to you, you take it good or bad, it's up to you. I was just giving constructive feedback sprinkled with some criticism. Take it well. Lastly there's more to everyone's life if you care to look deep enough.

I'm not taking your bait. Have a good day!

Passive aggression in one whole paragraph. (Yea cuz tik tok and only fans are two of the most toxic things women have done to men and so it should be no surprise it's brought up. Talk about suppressing male perspective). (I'll end it here cuz it's going too far and I meant none of it. Thanks). Chill.

Calling a man a zero and making him feel less of a man is not the best way for a woman to express her opinion. Take responsibility sometimes. It's toxic. I'm gonna chill now. I have no time to go back and forth with you on this. Don't quote me again.

Nobody is taking it personally. That's your assumption. Bye the way, people might likely profit from some psychoanalysis online, especially with strangers. They're only trying to stay safe. Nothing wrong with it.

Maybe you're the one projecting your pain onto men. Talk about practice what you preach others. That day you publicly called a man a "0" on the forum. You think that that's not hurtful. Publicly insulting someone. How about reflect on your own energy? This is the same guy who defended you a couple of posts ago and you publicly insulted his self esteem without self reflection. It is women like you who men have issues with and then you call it projecting. Calling you out on your behavior is nothing unfair. You get reasonable amount of support on the forum yet you unnecessarily lunge at others. Bye the way, I don't have much to learn from women who sleep with men for money because isn't that predatory already enough? It's basically feeding on men's vulnerability for sex and intimacy and making money off of it. What can I learn from people who do that? That men are weak? That men need sex? Usually any kind of a deal which involves a transaction is a rip off and men usually more often than not get ripped off in the process, the whole toxic only fans thing. You might say this has nothing to do with the topic. But friendships for men with women seem the same way. It's not a gain for men. Usually a loss-gain bargain where a woman profits from a man's attention, usually all she is most likely looking for. The man on the other hand only becomes an agent for her superficial needs.

You can't learn much about men with that attitude. Be open minded. Just a hint.

Explaining issues with the subject is not projecting. I'm explaining male mentality to someone who is completely ignorant of it and also why men are never friends with women.. You make the theory all the more plausible with your attitude here. Are you some kind of a preacher to men? I can't stand you lecturing men around the forum on how to be men. Maybe take your own advice. Men can be hurt too. Stop acting like they can't. I'm getting butt tired of your constant moral righteousness parade. It's not funny. It seems like you don't have a single clue on men's issues.

Also men want something that will lead to something substantial. They're brutally survival oriented than women. If they're into a woman, they're in it for the long haul, not just playing games. Of course they can have flings too, but on their own time, not at the expense of their personal peace. So if they see there's smoke without fire, they don't wanna waste too much time around it. Just getting a decent woman is already hard enough than wasting time around women who aren't worth the time. So if something doesn't lead to anything, then they have better things to do and attend to. It doesn't mean they can't be friends with you. But just generally men avoid being friends with women if there's not much to gain from it, it drains resources big time, this is male mentality, just deal with it. Don't make it overly complicated. Some men really want to be just friends, but you women won't give them the time of the day. You wanna bait high quality men and friendzone them, what for, they can find better girlfriends than be a woman's emotional tampon. Most women just use men in the name of being friends, anyway. Social media is full of emotionally manipulative women, the so called dark feminine, women using men to get likes on their profiles. Men are too tired of that shit and want to go for the real deal and not carrots hanging on a stick. Women are really good at dangling those carrots. Most men don't see being friends with women as a profitable option in the long run, always being friendzoned.

Only for those who know how to be around people generally peacefully. If it's not your job, then don't take it is what I meant originally by - don't create unnecessary shit. This is the most hilarious statement I must have come across. If you have that mentality, no wonder you find yourself in trouble sensing from your original post. Men don't like being riled up for shits and giggles. Don't know about women though. It's about social calibration. Men are starved and emotionally sensitive. Anything you say as a woman can be a big deal to them. You shouldn't take someone's emotions for granted. Retrospectively you could be doing more harm than good in your quest to meet needs lol. Yes it would be nice to get compliments from others too (I mean women you don't wanna date or expect sex from) but it comes with caveats. Nobody likes to deal with baggage and offloaded emotions. You're perhaps not good at it and that's why you repulsed those men and they walked out. Contrary to popular belief that men aren't emotional or they are too stoic, men can actually sense the intent behind a woman's conversation as it is an important means of dating and survival. It's easy to see how an emotionally starved man can see your compliments as a disguise. Just don't do it. Don't lay your hook where you don't wanna fish. The nature of your underhanded commenting suggests that you probably enjoy baiting. Tons of women like that. Your original post sounds like it. God, look at its length, just says how much you're fussing over a nonchalant issue lol. You could be creating a major life crisis for someone else.

Then process your logic around it first. That's impossible. There's not a donkey in the room. There's more to this than mere complimenting men. You don't just lose someone for complimenting them. You probably made them feel wanted and then unwanted. They felt offended and walked out of the drama. But you don't have to meet their needs when you have a husband, maybe attend to his needs if possible. It's valid for him to feel awkward if you're too worried about the needs of other men. When men complain about compliments they don't mean married and taken women lol. They mean there's not an abundant amount of flirting these days, thanks to feminists who make everything a chore and complain about misogyny all the time. It's not your job to meet an unmet need at the expense of everyone's peace. People will meet their needs in a more wholesome way without the extra baggage, if you know what I mean. I don't think people are always fishing for compliments. A drama free relationship is what most men look for. By generating less drama lol. If women didn't have an enormous sense of self importance, then maybe it wouldn't be so hard for men to date. Regarding cold and insular, just be nice and friendly and don't take it overboard. Avoid unnecessary shit if you can.

This is true. I agree with this. If you have a healthy relationship, you would never feel the need to explain anything. In fact if you have issues with communicating love, then it's often a sign of insecurities on both or one side at least. Or a lack of love.

I don't know what's the big deal with you. Doesn't seem like you want to minimize problems. You don't have to compliment everyone you meet. You could simply have a friendly conversation and that would be enough unless you want to make your partner uncomfortable on purpose,lol. You make this unnecessarily complicated. Yes compliments can be taken as affection and there's nothing wrong or emotionally un-aware about feeling that way, they are not uncalibrated if they thought something about it, in fact you're the one being uncalibrated lol. Because most people who want to flirt start with complimenting first. This is how society has always operated and it's not going to change to your needs. Maybe don't compliment the opposite sex on their looks, maybe compliment them on their abilities or maybe do it in front of your husband so it doesn't appear sneaky. You don't have to compliment someone, make them feel awkward, and then explain yourself or guilt trip them for feeling awkward because they misunderstood you. It wasn't their fault either. Don't guys who flirt with women pay them compliments? It goes both ways. If you don't have enough social calibration, then just don't try it and make it less stressful for everyone involved. Because compliments can often be very misleading, give mixed signals and are generally used with intention, especially if they're strangers. If you have already known them for a long time, then they might not take it too seriously as they have known enough about you and they already know the equation is platonic. And if this is a constant source of tension between you and your husband, then they're bigger problems between the two of you to sort than just complimenting noobs.

First of all great question. I'll use your question for contemplation. @Leo Gura is criticism useless really? You might want to think about it again. Criticism is a great tool for someone open mindede enough to use it as essential feedback. Don't you think? @The Redeemer to answer (I really don't have a great answer since it would need hours and days of contemplation) - calling someone out is definitely a good option and I wouldn't deny it. Along with it empathy, compassion, cooperation. If someone is not trying to get on board with you, they can't really help you. Teamwork is a big thing here. And providing massive value through your own hard work and commitment. Setting example. It's not easy to be out there and consistently provide value to people that they will use and become better in life. Being a light worker, empath, guide, leader, champion as well as a disciplinarian, all of that entails exhausting hours of work.

You realize that you can't have that word and "no homo" in the same sentence. You created a strange oxymoron there, strange loopy loopy guy.

Compliments count if they're validatory or else of little value.

Both have psychology in common. Grande's is pure refined unadulterated content whereas JPs looks like his own version of psychology mixed with his own biases and takes like pseudo psychology. He doesn't seem to count for clinical observations. More like a quack psychologist.

This account was created on August 17th. And now it ceases to exist. How is that possible? Even deleted accounts are visible. How come it became invisible? https://www.actualized.org/forum/profile/32049-peace-of-mind/

But how can a new account (just created 4 - 10 days ago) ask for deletion when they don't have the option to message you or moderator? I'm puzzled. It was said that new accounts weren't allowed to message.

I just saw an account exist and within 3 seconds it doesn't exist. Just disappeared and instead shows an error code in it's place. How is this possible? Strange. I would not like to mention that account to simply protect privacy. If a new account cannot message a moderator, how is this possible? Canceling registration through email?

Can a new account simply cease to exist without getting banned? As far as I know, an account is still visible even after a ban. Even if the posts are scrubbed off. But how does an account that's newly created just disappear? Is that because of canceling registration in the first week of creating the account or something? I've just seen highly unusual activity.

She seems like a try-hard. Reminds me of toxic positivity.