Buck Edwards

He uses success as a barometer of his spiritual knowledge, the irony.

It's awesome that you love to dance! It's a fantastic way to express yourself and have fun. Everyone's there to have fun (mostly). Most people at a club are there to enjoy the music and let loose. While some might be more skilled dancers, many are simply there to move and have a good time.Focus on how dancing makes you feel. Don't worry too much about looking "perfect" or impressing others. Dance with freedom and joy, and let your personality shine through. Experiment with different dance styles. What music makes you want to move? Explore genres like hip-hop, salsa, or even just freestyle. You might discover a style that feels more natural to you. If I were in a club I would try zumba. If you're feeling self-conscious, start by dancing near the edge of the dance floor or in a less crowded area. Gradually work your way towards the center as you feel more comfortable. If people laugh, try not to take it personally. Sometimes, laughter can be contagious and good-natured. If you're having a blast, that energy will likely be infectious. Spend some time observing how other people are dancing. Get a feel for the energy of the club. Begin with some simple moves, like swaying to the music or tapping your feet. Gradually increase the intensity as you feel more comfortable. Listen to your body. If you feel yourself getting too carried away and feeling self-conscious, tone it down a bit. Ultimately, the most important thing is to have fun! If you're enjoying yourself, that will shine through and make you more attractive to others.Confidence is key. Even if you're not the most graceful dancer, owning your moves will make a big difference. Focus on the music and the feeling it gives you. Let the rhythm guide your movements. Don't let the fear of judgment hold you back from enjoying yourself.

Starting a religion is not easy. They often turn into cults. Once the pioneer or founder is dead, the religion can be hijacked and turned into a sophisticated cult by it's followers.

My stats have improved. And I'm feeling better today. Waiting ardently for tomorrow. Sometimes I want time only to myself.

Oh my goodness.

Snakes are charming.

What things do you admire in a woman of your interest? What things piss you off or annoy in a partner?

September 6th entry. My balls potted are 15,856. That's quite impressive for now. I want to up it everyday. I will not focus on victory. I'd rather focus on balls potted everyday. Focusing on winning and losing is discouraging. December 27th entry My balls potted are 23, 503. Quite some progress.

My first encounter with ayahuasca happened approximately two weeks after completing my initial dark retreat, which had left me in a positive state of mind. As someone who had recently started exploring psychedelics, I decided to participate in an official ceremony rather than trying the powerful substance alone for the first time. Let me paint a picture of the ceremony for you. Upon arrival at the ceremony location, I was warmly welcomed and led to a waiting room where thirty more people would join me over the next half hour. When it was time to enter the ceremonial room, my attention was immediately drawn to the shaman, who exuded love, kindness, warmth, and security. He gave me a long, warm hug, and I knew I was in good hands. After the shaman's introduction, each participant expressed their intention for the day. We practiced the correct breathing technique to ensure effective inhalation from the pipe. This was followed by holotropic breathing exercises to release any remaining tension and prepare the mind. Each of us received a glass pipe to hold close to our hearts while staying connected to our intention for the experience. The shaman administered the medicine to each participant seemingly at random. The first person to inhale the smoke reacted strongly, which briefly heightened my nerves. I focused on my intention and reminded myself to surrender to the experience. Suddenly, the shaman sat in front of me, and I began deep breathing before inhaling the smoke. The effects of the medicine kicked in almost immediately, and I was transported to a timeless and spaceless place of pure being. I experienced profound connection and love, and felt a deep understanding of the universe. Ayahuasca is magic, it really changes you. In an instant, I returned to my human form, overwhelmed with emotion. I wept in awe at the beauty I had witnessed, then burst into laughter in disbelief. Looking around, I realized the ceremony was still ongoing, despite feeling like I had been gone for eternity. The shaman's knowing smile conveyed his understanding of my experience in a way words could not. I am immensely grateful for this experience and everyone who made it possible. Thank you from the bottom of my heart.

Ok

I have been looking for a good AI that can transcribe long YouTube videos. I need it for my personal development work as I often don't get time to listen to long videos and I usually do better reading than listening. Would be a great help if you can suggest any. I have tried komo AI but it's not that great.

@Leeo_SA thank you.

Some part of society will always be toxic red. For some reason I sometimes enjoy the toxic red of Old Wild West, the guns,cowboy hats, horses, beer and vintage taverns.

5 meo

Beautiful trance. I think you do lucid dreaming often. I find lucid dreaming quite useful. In the future I also want to try strong psychedelics.

Words seem to fail me now, tangled in a knot of emotions I can barely untangle. How did we, once so entwined, find ourselves adrift in this sea of discontent? I remember the way your smile used to chase away the shadows, the warmth of your hand in mine, the echoes of laughter that filled our days. Where has that joy gone? Replaced by icy silences, unspoken grievances, and a lingering ache in the places where our love used to reside. I see the distance growing between us, a chasm widening with each passing day. Your eyes, once mirrors reflecting my soul, now seem distant, guarded. I yearn for the intimacy we once shared, the effortless flow of conversation, the comfortable silences that spoke volumes. Perhaps I've become too demanding, too clingy, too lost in the illusion of forever. Maybe you've grown weary of my imperfections, the flaws that once seemed endearing now magnified into insurmountable obstacles. But know this, my love: even in this fog of hurt and confusion, my heart still beats for you. The memory of our happiness lingers, a ghost of what once was. And the thought of losing you completely fills me with a despair I cannot bear. I don't know if there's a way back from this precipice, if we can mend the cracks that have appeared in the foundation of our love. But I long to try, to fight for the embers of our affection, to fan them back into a flame. Please, let's talk. Let us lay bare our hearts, our fears, our disappointments. Let us try to understand, to forgive, to heal. With a heart heavy with sorrow, * Lost intimacy: my note highlights the fading connection and the longing for the past closeness. * Unspoken grievances: It acknowledges the presence of unspoken issues that are driving the rift. * Self-reflection: I express self-doubt and consider my own role in the conflict. * A plea for understanding: Despite the pain, my note expresses a desire to reconcile and rebuild the relationship.

I like to make up some concepts which I then use in my visualization practice. One concept that came up this morning was using a magic chemical since I deal with alchemy. A magic chemical that instantly promotes calm. I will call this chemical akemhyvoid. I want this chemical to look like water and be organic with some herbs and vitamins infused in it. I tried googling and came across a brand called Sunsweet selling herbal water. Not only are the bottles beautiful and perfect for what I had in mind but they also had these nice labels for each bottle like focusing and energizing This is how they look. This is an awesome find for me I would love to order these.

Hehe you're talking about the man from Taured I guess.

Sometimes I feel good about having duped you. It's like revenge. But Leo says revenge comes from a place of low integrity. And you still wanted me? You must have received enough approval then!! Bored? I saw you interested in me. Or at least trying to make it appear that way. More games? Never be around someone who seeks excessive approval of the opposite sex. Another lesson. Yea I'm badly hurt. Why should I hide? The audacity to call me a vulture. When you were the one all along. How much of a hypocrite can someone be? How do you sleep at night? Oh well, you don't. You simply can't. How many people have you hurt with your games? Sometimes I forget that you were schizophrenic. You were excessively paranoid about me and you only thought bad about me. Why? Tell me why. You did everything in your power to destroy me. Why? It can't be possible that you aren't schizophrenic. You are paranoid as fuck. You have lazy eyes. You would go crazy over every little thing. You thought I was doing things to you when I wasn't. You played victim. You invented things to accuse me of. You thought I was gonna kill you which wasn't true. Not one bit. You even wanted to try meds to see the difference between before and after meds because you knew that you suffer severe paranoia and it makes you believe irrelevant shit and make up beliefs and scenarios that aren't completely true. Isn't this all true? You're nuts. And I still love you. I madly love you. Because you would make me sit on your lap. You can make me laugh. You can make me cry. I crave you. I crave your love. Your attention. Your validation. I didn't need anyone's validation except yours. You make me feel belonged and conflicted at the same time.

This seems poetic.

Ironically you taught me to be stronger. It's ok. I suffered some eternal torment with you. Yet I learned a fuck ton in the relationship. Another lesson to learn is to know that if something appears too confusing, it's just better to drop it altogether. When will I learn my fucking lesson? If someone is being too secretive, why even bother. Good hearted people are open, not secretive. They don't hide how they feel. You have lots of ways to blame me. Have you ever looked in the mirror? Maybe it wasn't all my fault. Or maybe it was.. Read reality carefully. Another lesson. It's morning and I just wanna fall asleep. I have been thinking about you my sweet soulmate. You are my only protector.

@LoseYourvelf thank you. Cheers.

@Human Mint thanks.

But anyway. I have to hold my calm.. Right now I'm thinking about you. I scammed you. I mistreated you. I duped you. And I hold myself completely responsible for it. At the same time my feelings were and are true and you should know. After I fell in love with you, I never thought of anyone else. I know you absolutely fking hate me to the core. And why not. I did you nasty. You realized it. You felt unsafe. You felt bad. Hurt. Wounded. Angry. I'm in a much better mental state now than before. No brain fog. I realize now what I done. I hurt you badly. The realization has hit me after a very long time. I wish we communicated a lot more. You were far too secretive for me to have any idea of how you felt. Or what were your exact thoughts. How could I have known? You placed way too many expectations on me. You have some life experience in that department. So you know more. Don't dismiss and judge me so casually. I know you are pissed off at my audacity. You must be thinking - how dare I? I deserve every form of bashing and hatred from you for what I did. I'm not sure if I can forgive myself either. In hindsight, I learned a fuck ton of lessons. I learned the meaning of love. I learned my own delusional expectations in relationships. I learned my flaws. I learned not to judge. Today your thoughts are on my mind. It's a heavy feeling. Something I can't get rid of. It's like you all over again. I'm in a much better place though. I'm able to process my emotions much better than before. My brain isn't cloudy. My brain isn't foggy. I can think straight something I couldn't do months ago. I was being pressured too much. I had way too much shit to deal with emotionally speaking. I exhibited self deception and a tremendous lack of self awareness. And not just that. I exhibited too much immaturity. Probably my autism? I don't know.