Jwayne

Where's all that magic been since then? Is it like a video game where has 100 magicka points and then needs to re-charge? Or like a Hollywood movie where he exhausts his vitality and then needs to rest for a while (i.e. 70 years)?

He always speaks from his political and religious biases. It's not about commitment but mutual understanding. Even moreso than that its about respect and fun.

I agree there is little evidence (i.e. a single ambiguous isolated incident) to support he is a sexual predator. This video is not definitive either way. Although I agree with the internet outrage on the basis of defending victims of abuse. Even if it was not intended, the Dalai Lama's actions come far too close. I consider this was an inappropriate act, and I also consider the possibility of repressed sexuality. He was right to issue an apology. He would be wise to issue a further statement. Not to self-deprecate himself or to appease the media, but to address the genuine and legitimate concerns that have been raised about pedophilia and sexual predation.

The favorable interpretation ranges from Dalai Lama can do nothing wrong because he's a spiritually superior being to he made an innocent mistake. The unfavorable interpretation ranges from he is expressing the dark side of volcel sexual repression and perhaps has done similar (or worse) behaviors before in-private to he acted inappropriately. We cannot know his intentions. The benefit of the doubt goes to his lifetime(s) of spiritual practice. We cannot know the suffering he may have brought to the kid. The benefit of the doubt goes to take caution in protecting the child. It is logical that there ought to be more evidence of his 'inappropriate' lifestyle/activity, if it exists. And it is also reasonable to expect some statement from the family if they felt the situation was inappropriate or not. Another context is whether Tibetan culture accepts the Dalai Lama'a actions. That may be a mixed reaction. Maybe something more definitive will surface.

Where is the evidence that its normal in Tibet to do this behavior between old men and children? There should be other videos of old Tibetan men and young boys behaving like this, right? Can you find anything like that?

Go and ask some children in your neighborhood (doesn't matter what country it is) to 'suck your tongue' and see how many of them find it playful. And see how many parents are offended. And see how many people in the community are alarmed. And try to defend your action to them on the basis of your spiritual superiority, specifically your deep love and compassion for children. We don't need to rush to judgement on the character of Dalai Lama based on a 50-second clip. But neither do we need to normalize old men mouth kissing and asking for 'tongue sucking' from young boys as 'playful'. Dalai Lama is a role model, right? A supposedly very spiritual being. He should be held to the highest standards. Instead many are making excuses for him.

He requested the boy to share (small) acts of intimacy with him. That's a kind of greed. It's not sharing but demanding (e.g. kiss my mouth, suck my tongue). It's exploitative. Holding a hand is more than enough to show compassion. Or even more subtle is just a look, or a smile. Or some words. Anything that shares and doesn't demand from the other. Especially not a physical demand.

'Innocence' doesn't need to mouth kiss, does it? Why not kiss the forehead? Why kiss at all? And why not just stick out your tongue and make a silly face? Why tell him to suck it, and after saying it, why not be silly and laugh? Why keep the tongue extended? Why lean in as if it were serious? There are millions of other harmless jokes that don't have obvious predatory connotations.

How are you going to determine or measure the suffering this brought the boy? It may not be felt until many years later, as is often so with trauma. There is also the suffering brought to his family, specifically, his parents. The way to prevent suffering in such situations is to go nowhere near them. Don't put yourself in such a dangerous place where you are an old man kissing a young boy and asking him (joking or not) to suck your tongue. Once you have crossed that line. There is no telling what you may have done. So it was a wild misjudgement for the Dalai Lama to go into this kind of situation. Why would he risk this unless it is his normal disposition?

You are spinning in circles on the question of his 'intention'. I'm saying the 'intention' of the abuser is irrelevant to whatever abuse follows. That's the reason cultural norms exist. There are behaviors that are nearly universally prohibited because nothing good can come from it. One of those is old men mouth-to-mouthing young boys. It's the decision to take such an action which is problematic. There are millions of other ways to show compassion, playfulness and love which don't infringe upon the rights (and bodily integrity) of a child.

The implication is that Salvijus (you) possesses a unique ability to detect 'genuine compassion' and that victims everywhere were abused because they couldn't differentiate 'genuine compassion' from 'lust'. Otherwise, what's your point? What you call 'compassion' millions of others consider to be abusive. So maybe keep that 'compassion' away from other peoples' children.

It's easy? That's victim blaming. As if it were the fault of the abused for not detecting a predator. If it were easy then there wouldn't be scandal after scandal all over the world.

I want you to be careful, because you may have kids one day. Or be responsible for children in some capacity. A predator may be a very pious and compassionate person. They may be loving and friendly towards the kid without any obvious signs. But, if you were to follow them around, you would see the things I mentioned: compliance testing, trust-building, keeping secrets, increased physical contact, and so on. My point is that the Dalai Lama exhibited increased intimate contact (e.g. mouth kissing) and some degree of compliance testing in this 50-second clip. And not with an adult woman (or man), which would be a normal part of the mating ritual. But with a young boy. That's an abnormal red flag you should pay attention to in your real life. You may want to dismiss it because he is recognized to be a very spiritual person. But please, be skeptical, in your own life, for the sake of potential victims. Don't be naive about how, unfortunately, common child abuse is.

Yes, theoretically. But we are discussing an actual moment recorded on video. Are you omniscient? Can you see inside other people's minds? So what's the point of you saying whether someone is acting out of 'lust' or 'playfulness'?

Some predators seek the consent of children. And when the child agrees to the act, then will they procede together. The predator feels morally satisfied that the child has agreed to participate. And so they don't feel they have done anything wrong, even if the victim later recounts their pain. You may also have consent under coercion, such as being on-camera in-front of a large audience seated before a godly figure whom you are taught can do nothing wrong. The entire situation leads you to believe whatever they do must be right and my feelings must be wrong. It would take Herculean courage for a kid to reject the advances of a holy man in such a situation. The predator has many ways of framing it, but they all serve to justify the enjoyment of the adult over the helpless minor.

I have to add that many predators (i.e. pedophiles) are also 'compassionate', 'respectful' and 'loving' towards their victims. Some are violent offenders, no doubt. But many are simply seeking intimacy (albeit in the wrong place). They get that intimacy by grooming children via building trust and through compliance testing, such as keeping secrets. The victim may not even recognize their own trauma and suffering until many years later. At the time of the abuse they may report feeling normal, or even positive. So that the Dalai Lama was non-violent does not mean he wasn't being abusive. Children cannot give consent. Does every adult have the right to mouth kiss other people's children and ask 'and suck my tongue'? Do exiled Heads of State and religious authorities have greater privileges over children's bodies than others?

Exactly my point. Children cannot give consent because they are minors. Is it worse to ask a minor for a mouth kiss and 'suck my tongue', or to just do it? They're both reprehensible, are they not? Suppose you ask. The kid may say no. I would prefer a predator asks so the kid has an extra opportunity to defend themselves. So its safer for a predator to not seek permission and rather ask for forgiveness later. Exactly as the Dalai Lama has done.

Maybe the Dalai Lama should have sought consent before making intimate advances. "Would you like to kiss my mouth?" "Would you like to suck on my tongue?" Instead he leveraged his authority over a powerless child without asking (or caring) about the kid's opinion, or the kid's guardians/parents opinions. He could have asked the parents, "Will it be okay if I make a sexually suggestive joke on-camera with your son? I want to ask him to suck my tongue and then see if he will comply and really do it, or not."

I'll give you something for your list. #1. Grooming behavior. The Dalai Lama used a series of compliance tests to see how much he could get away with. Which is a common practice amongst sexual predators. First something inoffensive, like "come closer". And then progressing to more intimact contact, like hug and mouth kiss. And then after a moment of deliberation, an escalation to something even more inappropriate.

I can promise you that the people you are discussing with on this forum right now don't have children nor close relations with them. It is impossible to be so crass about this subject ('haha it's just a sex joke') when you are personally around children that you love and care about on a daily basis, and see how impressionable and sensitive they are.

People in the 'East' are also outraged. That's my entire point. People in India, China, Korea, Japan, etc. are also disgusted by this. There is no 'cultural defense' for this. Hence why HH was forced to issue an apology. If it was standard behavior then he would be able to explain. This is very symptomatic of the dark side of repressed sexuality that can show up in voluntary celibates, such as Catholic Priests. The Dalai Lama used his authority to tower over the child in this situation. That's how trauma is formed and its exploitative. Now what's happening is a kind of gaslighting against Eastern people by Western people because Eastern people are very protective of their children. No nation in the East has sex education textbooks showing blowjobs, etc. like certain European countries (e.g. Netherlands) do. The sexualization of children is a Western phenomenon and this is being projected onto the East, as if Eastern people also think the same way. This is not about Tibetan 'tongue greetings'.

I absolutely agree that sexualizing children is exploitative.

Danioover9000 probably doesn't have kids, and neither does the Dalai Lama. People without close connection to children through either family or vocation can't relate to why others have a protective instinct towards them. And they can't appreciate the way children experience the world, how impressionable they are, and how trauma forms. It's not okay to make sexual jokes with children. Nothing even remotively sexually suggestive in any way with children is appropriate. The Dalai Lama's actions were very direct and straightforward, and wrong.

Some want to 'speak for' Tibetan culture when they're not Tibetan themselves. And neither have they asked Tibetan people whether they need someone else to speak on their behalf. Nor have they even asked a Tibetan person their opinion. And they can't produce any evidence that men asking children to suck on their tongues has anything to do with Tibetan culture. They can't produce any evidence of why adults kissing children on the mouth and asking them to 'suck my tongue' would be funny to Tibetan people. The nervous laughter in the video is disbelief that the Dalai Lama is being serious and how wildly inappropriate it is, hence His Holiness' apology (which by the way, were only for his hurtful words, and not even his actions).

Shame on you for suggesting that children sucking men's tongues is a normalized part of Tibetan culture. Dalai Lama didn't merely 'stick his tongue out' as a greeting from a distance but said to the boy to kiss him on the mouth and after he did so he requested "and suck my tongue". And then leaned his tongue towards the boy's mouth. Can you find any examples of Tibetan men asking or joking with children to suck their tongues? Can you find any evidence that this is a joke in Tibetan culture? Are there any other videos where people do this? Shame on you for suggesting that Tibetan people think pedophilia jokes are okay. You want to 'defend' their culture, but have you asked any Tibetan people what they think? You are highly presumptuous.