enzyme

96 is a helluva lifetime From what you've shared, she sounds like she's been an excellent role model for you, that's really all you could ask for. I'm sure you made her very proud, have a safe journey.

I can't speak for anyone else on the forum, but I think I understand. It wasn't too long ago that some Actualized content felt too much for me to handle. I don't frequent the forum as much because I still struggle with basic things to do with managing my emotions and depression/anxiety. I can't see any good reason in seeking high spiritual understanding if I still have regular human baggage still to deal with. I'm aware that interpreting things incorrectly can make all that stuff worse, and it's my responsibility, I wouldn't blame Leo or anyone else. I felt compelled to write this just in case there's maybe other users here who are maybe similar to me, still quite young and have a lot to experience in normal life. There's no shame in giving this work a miss until you feel more well-adjusted.

The question to ask yourself: does your inner child ever think such a thing? No concept of biology, genetics, shifts in mood. I'd bet my money that despite whatever your genetics are, you never knew nor cared as a child, That's the ticket.

Any interaction with them, doesn't matter. My dad spent 10 years of his life 'debunking' CT's and he turned into a deranged Trumper who believed flouride in our tap water was an ulterior motive to brainwash society.

People who want to look smart. It's an ego thing. Conspiracy theories are the fools idea of intelligence.

In my humble opinion, it's worth giving veganism a shot if you haven't already, for a month at least. If you still feel like crap after that like I did then fair enough, meat is just something you need in your diet. Being vegetarian is an option too although - if animal welfare is your main concern - the dairy industry isn't innocent either. There's still death and despair in that area unfortunately.

If it helps any, I find it's best sometimes to reduce time spent on forums and consuming other forms of media in general until you don't feel as low. When you were a child, you mostly FELT the world rather than THOUGHT of it in any real capacity. That child still lives in you, so you're allowed to go back to the basics and take pleasure in the simplest of things.

@Leo Gura Only reason I had to was because we had some clients who worked in the public health sector, gotta make sure this site runs on old boomer's PC's running windows XP

Play Heart of Darkness on PS1

@LordFall Watching people's feeds of them going out with mutuals gave me the FOMO, plus I got tired of the more general bs posts people make. If I had a brand or a business, that would be how I use social media productively, to promote said brand or business. Otherwise I feel like I'm just consuming other people's crap.

@LordFall I had to stop with IG and social media in general, was affecting my mental health @Leo Gura I see your point, I should be having fun with it above all else, thanks brother

@Leo Gura I know getting through high volume would take the pressure off, but what would you say about approaches if your nerves and anxiety are through the roof? I had been pushing through regardless but - I'm ashamed to admit - I was in tears and wanted to go home. I think a line should be drawn somewhere, surely it's not worth it if I'm in such a state?

@Kalki Avatar Unless it's an e-sports game like Counter Strike I personally don't see the benefit in sinking hundreds of thousands of hours to improve in a game, it's about having fun. As for improving, there's loads of youtube videos out there, some people dedicate their entire channel to making tips and tricks videos on certain games, strategy/sim games especially.

@Judy2 You're probably right, could've been a one off where I just wasn't up to it @Yimpa She was working behind the bar and I striked up conversation with her, wasn't expecting it to go anywhere though she was on the job. It wasn't until I saw her again outside her work that the thought crossed my mind that I could do a genuine approach, but eh it's past now

Unless it's directly affecting your lifestyle and keeping you in the house all the time then there's nothing wrong with video games. Could always set a timer if you get sucked into a session - I'd be playing Civ 6 and 2 hours would go by in the blink of an eye if I'm not careful.