Selfnaught

It’s funny in a way because I already answered that in my last contemplation that wrote when I said Truth is eternal. Don’t know how I didn’t put that together. so then collapsing somehow has to be different than ending.

I became a parent about three years ago. I am not the perfect parent so take this for what it is. it is not beneficial for everyone to have babies. Only have one if you want one when the timing is right. you have to be financially and mentally ready. Be ready to support your other half as that is just as challenging as raising a newborn at times. Your other half must be on the same page as you. know that your child will be selfish and have no expectations and also expect nothing in return, not even a lasting relationship. What separates is the willingness and wanting to be a parent for yourself only and willing to love and also willing to let go. parenting can be rewarding, but the rewards are not a reason to want to be a parent. All egos are selfish. You have to ask yourself if this is how you want to be selfish, because you’re only doing this for you.

I have been lurking this forum since mid 2020 really and signed up on this account a few months ago. I mainly came here after discovering that Truth exists. No an awakening or anything, but just a YouTube video that really hit home for me that Truth cannot not exist. I mainly stay on the spirituality forums but thought it was more appropriate to put this here. Sorry if this is still the wrong place. I mainly just read threads, I only have two threads myself and never respond to any threads due to me not being “awake” or having a no dual experience I feel as if I don’t know enough to contribute. I recently signed up for therapy and have my first appointment this week, figure I should start working on some things I’m not so good at - the biggest thing would be communication and patience. I don’t want to be medicated though as when I was on Prozac it did absolutely nothing for me but make my anxiety worse. That’s actually gone away a lot now through my own self doing. I don’t have time to invest time into really doing mushrooms and lsd to really be on a track to how Leo teaches either, as my entire days are filled with stimulation and doing things for others: I rarely have free time. Even this thread is cut short due to being interrupted I want to start posting more, I feel maybe it would be good to start commenting on threads in some way.

*something I’ve been working on, hopefully I’m doing contemplation correctly * When I search for the eternal, it can’t be something I find today or tomorrow, or something I have found. It has to be something that has already been here. If this eternity is all present because of the oneness nature of it, then it can’t be discovered. It has to be something that has been there but has been overlooked or unnoticed. It can only be remembered. How do I know there is something eternal? Because Truth is. Truth has to have always existed because even if there were nothing in existence that would be the truth, therefore Truth exist. Am I assuming eternity has a oneness nature to it? No, because everything is connected and it’s obvious to see. Whether the Big Bang or a Creator God or a simulation or a dream it would all be one when you get down to it. So Truth, as we call it is eternal, but does it describe what is eternal? No, but what is eternal is Truth. Anything that has a beginning is not eternal. Imagination is not eternal. Nor thoughts, nor awareness, nor awakeness, nor wisdom, nor knowledge, nor understanding. I imagine my reality but whatever I imagine is not the eternal Truth. Everything is imagined, in fact, and it is not eternal. So everything that is not eternal is imagined. Even if it is actual in front of this human body I see out of, it is imagined. Science, which is also imagined, even says everything happens in the brain. Nothing that exists is eternal but is noneternal in its form. Everything is eternal it just changes form. Everything contains this quality of Truth because it is within reality. Reality is within Truth. Whatever Truth is, it is in everything, and even knowing Truth is not controlling thoughts, and imagining and manifesting experience. Knowing Truth does not mean you will have your life together and being successful in life does not require knowledge of Truth. Eternity is infinite and that would mean Truth is infinite as well. And Infinite would be infinitely infinite due to it being infinite. So the Eternal Truth would be infinite but also indistinguishable because there can only be Truth. However, being infinitely infinite the vastness would make the indistinguishable Truth seem distinguishable from a finite mind inside of infinite Truth. Infinite and eternal seems to be something that describes Truth. There cannot be a starting point to Truth if it is Eternal but there also can be if it is infinite. *still in progress*

One time I used a well renown book for an essay while I was in college on a topic completely unrelated to anything we talk about here. The topic, while for a class, also was a topic I loved to study at that time. I posted the entire essay on a forum and and few members corrected a part of my essay I got from that book and after doing research it turns out the book was wrong and they were right! This particular thing I got wrong was something I had no knowledge of due to to it being a subtopic that I really didn’t dive into or read about until then. Not making excuses at all, I still read. That has set in a bad way with me though. Especially when one realizes books are written by people who have biases and their own agendas. There’s always criticism of another person for whatever book so I take things as more of an opinion than fact which is why sometimes it may be better to do videos of what multiple “experts” are saying to get a clearer understanding on a certain subject within a subject. For instance in nonduality, for example, I’ve read Jed McKennas “The Damndest Thing” and I’m sure there’s some people here that disagree with his position. When I have to do my own research on a book I give them the same grain of salt I do to any other form of information.

Thank you, sometimes I wonder if I’m contemplating or just ranting essentially lol. I’m still thinking about this statement. It says a lot. The statement implies a duality (ego=fish/Truth=water). A fish can’t live without water.

I used to watch Leo’s videos back in 20/21 all the time but while on a factory line, so I only got to take in little of the information of what he was actually saying. Believe it or not, I had more time at a factory then I do now. The video that helped me the most was his video on what is actual. The last video I watched of his was about 6 months ago or more now and I remember him saying that if you’re not doing psychedelics be prepared for him to leave you in the dust. I’ll comment more on this forum when time allows, giving my thoughts and making sure it can make sense. I also may give details of personal stuff about my story this far via threads and see how that goes. Thank you for your welcoming. I feel that, I just don’t want to post anything or lead anyone down a certain way without knowing anything myself. Especially mainly staying in the enlightenment sub forum, commenting seems silly when I’ve never even had a no dual experience. I may not know anything more than I do now even after the experience

Thank you for the responses. I'll follow such advice and see what happens.

My first ever experience with psychedelics. Wife was my sitter and she had me take two tabs. She had me also smoke THC wax with it. Some nausea, lots of energy in the body. I was able to "step out" from my vision and things got clearer. Everything was as if it's made from light and just shines. Hologram-like. it was as if what I was looking at was being created by light, looked as if it was hollow, and just had a brilliance about it that I don't see with sober vision. It was hard to keep this type of vision though. At times I was the moment or experience. I had the feeling that me being in the moment was me being the actual moment, if that makes sense. Thoughts "ran" the whole time. My monkey mind (or voice in my head) never changed. I still was the observer. Next day lots of fatigue and brain fog. Going to do another soon in a day or two without wax or sitter and I'll be more isolated to observe for this type of work better, and then I'm not sure when I'll have an opportunity to experiment with this again. I obviously want to get the most out of this final dose I have. Any tips? Should I try to keep a notebook while I'm tripping?

Hi all, long time reader, won't post much as I am unqualified to really say much here about this stuff, I'm looking for understanding about past. So, I was thinking about fear and survival, realizing you can't survive without fear. I then went to thinking really every fear is a belief, as it hasn't happened yet. So then, in order to test to see if a fear is true, I would have to experiment. For example, say if I believe that if I don't eat I'll lose weight. It starts as belief until I test the theory. I don't eat, and I see I lose weight. However, if I'm to be open to the past is just my imagination, then I don't know if it really happened. You could say within this dream the past is real, but then when I'm trying to forget my past to awaken the same would imply. Even when someone like Mooji says forget everything and then he keeps talking, my mind always thinks something "I understand what your saying, language was learned in my past, so how can I forget everything?" I realized lately that I'm completely lost in this work and am not any closer than when I started. I used to reduce to Truth is all that exist, but it even seems like even Truth is a concept. I hope this post makes a bit of sense.