BojackHorseman

I started dating veeeery late (35) Then got married Now I regret a bit not having had more expérience with women, but even if I wanted now, I couldnt anyway I'm old, not very attractive or outgoing and had a terribly flat life. But I cant help but feel those feels. I love all women, am attractif to all of them. I Ish to have sex With a lot of different women, experience mant strange kinks (some that I did already), and, a bit more shameful, I regret that I will never be able to have sex With young women And this hurts me a lot, because since I was a virgin and alone up until 35, I actually never experienced being with a young woman. Am I just a dirty old pervert that shoumd shir up and has missed his life? I can't help but feel immense regret, that goes further than just sex. This seems stupid but is a huge burden to me and I'm not sure how to fix it.

Am finishing the video About the example of "being a mad man might be better than living a life stuck in cubicle" Sure, everything is relative But most of the time, for the sake of simplification, I'll take extreme cases, and I believe that what we qualify as "mad" is a person that cannot take care of him/her and is dangerous for them or others. Which lead us back to "is hurting others or dying bad?" Thing is, objectively, no, it's not. Being Hitler is objectively not bad, and I'm not even mad at that thought. But as a living species, we have to decide of a way of living. And if we do want to, well, live, with the least "useful" (as in, the one that makes us make progress) suffering, we can't decide to just die. And we can't decide to let useless suffering happen if we can help it. In the mad man exemple, not commenting on the methods and I think psychiatry does have its share of bad treatment and just numbing people out. But, if we accept that we want to be a living species, and therefore protect life, I think it's not of any use avoiding the idea that healing people (the best we can), protecting them in general, is an idea that could be considered bad. Those ideas about bias are very seductive (I actually do tend to think like that whenever I can), and absolutely true as a way of thinking, and can be VERY useful to understand the world better around us rather than being dogmatic, but at some point we gotta ACT. For our survival. And if we do not want to survive, fine. But for those who do (otherwise, what is the point of life honestly, if you don't use it?), yeah, I think taking decisions that will, on average, make humanity stronger, is good. Not talking about capitalism or tech or whatnot. Those can still be problems to discuss and balance and will leave plenty of ordeals to grow ourselves. But simple survival, and just not killing each others? I'm sure those could benefit anyone that puts his ego on the side, fighting for petty things (yes, even religions and territories) EDIT : the video is still great and useful tho. It is a great way of thinking. But sometimes, balancing things too much I think, may be almost as detrimental as being dogmatic. And I'm the first victim of that. People have always looked at me weird, frustrated, because I'm always trying to balance things out instead of just having a simple unilateral opinion

Am currently watching the video. I really tend to place myself as post-modernist from what I understand, I often really annoy most people with always balancing things and trying to be empathetic to even horrible persons, but I think that being able to think in a fragmented way and seeing many perspectives does not mean some things can't be as we say they are right now on some level It doesn't have to be everything or nothing/extreme in all regards A few thoughts I had while listening : 1) "if you put an elephant in a vaccum you cannot tell if it's big or small" But nothing exists in a vaccum. We don't. Also, this is a data about size, that is not relative. So the comparison to more complex problems, even as a simplificaction, seems wrong 2) Basically we're saying, and I agree, that no country is right. Depends on the perspective. That there is no one truth. But there is. The one truth should be avoiding extinction of living organisms and planets. Avoiding suffering. Therefore, you could objectively say that the best way to do this, is to take simple decisions as sharing ressources, avoiding violence, etc (of course, having an authority strong and connected enough to enforce that, as humans are right now, seems impossible) You can admit that there are many truth. This is actually undeniable. But over those, the bigger truth is that we should get to this general well-being of the livings. 3) Some things, like some aspects of science, have to be true. It doesn't mean that you can't have a lot of fun questionning many many other aspects of life. But questionning that the Earth is round when we have visual proof of it (and therefore not just biased humans point of views) is a waste of time. Go question ghosts, ki, whatever you want after that, but the world we see with our human bodies is this one. (there might be a million more layers to it, but this one layer here, I think we kind of nailed it on some basic aspects) 4) "There are many facts that you will overlook"/being selective about science. Probably. But then, what? Is there even a few valuable exemples to this, where people could actually say "damn, we should really study this, why didn't we think about it earlier ?" 5) you can interpret text differently and that's all that matters in the end. But you cannot deny the intent of the one who wrote it. If they're saying homosexuals should be punished, no matter where this comes from, then they mean it. The "them" that they are at this moment, which is all that matters to describe them as a person when they wanted to communicate something, undeniably wanted to mean this. So why try and say you could interpret that they're actually all for lgtbt or whatnot? There's plenty of space in your head and the world to find the worldview you resonate with about a given problem. No need to try and force other's views about it. I didn't finish the video yet (funny how this advocates against me considering the "we see everything selectively" point of view), so I might be surprised, but I think those aspects of it probably won't suddenly be changed as the video continues. So there's that already. tl;dr is probably : Lots of things have to be put into perspective, but not everything has to. (sorry if this was hard to read, english is not my first language) Not just here to say "Wrong !" by the way, I actually love the video so far, makes me think, I didn't even knew/think about those terms so far

First, sorry for stupid title. I am, by no means, ever going to mock anyone for ANY belief system. But I am personnally in such a dark time that I am considering trying to fit my life into some sort of religious system But as I was contemplating the most discussed ones, I was wondering. What is this? It's just humans writing stories, right? There was never any sign of god. Only confused people, or liars, or whatever made them believe their God told them to write about them. So what point is there in following a religion? I'm starting to think, as I dislike it, trust me, that all of this, if it's not always bad because it cas still be a tool for people to develop, is just a waste of time, compared to using actual science/psychology, etc (and trust me I'm NOT a science guy. I'm utterly stupid and ignorant). For me religion, as it's basically thoughts and stories written by humans, are by no means anymore important or useful than any book or story of any type. I feel like people are taking them so seriously, probably partly because of how old they are, and how blurred and exotic they seem to us. Basically they came first so they're better than whatever system of teachings and development that happened after them. But why? Everything else has, broadly said, evolved ever since it was created (at least in terms of potential, not the use that is made of it, cause of course we have smartphones but clearly the way we use it is not always a step up from earlier technologies). So why is religion this set in stone, sacred thing? Even if we started considering it was real, there is no way to check, right? Who said the persons that wrote the bible were not liars, manipulators, or mentally ill?

It is. No question. And it should be freeing. It sometimes is and was up until a certain point. But now it's driving me crazyer everyday. I could try and change my lifestyle. I could divorce, meet new people, find a new activity, but I don't care. What would it change? Humans interactions are always the same. I feel like I've reach the end of my interest for life. But I don't even want to kill myself. So I'm just stuck in this body with no purpose and I don't think I even want one anymore. It feels so bad that I kind of want to try anything to stop feeling like that, but I don't know what to do. I'm going to see a psychiatrist for the first time in life very soon but I doubt he can teach me anything about myself, and I don't want meds cause I have terrible medical anxiety and just thinking back about everything that can happen when taking meds for depression/anxiety/adhd/autism or whatever it is I have, is borderline starting up panic attack in me. Also so many people saying they felt like zombies, they're better off without meds etc. Plus if I get meds as a patch over my wound it doesn't fix the wound. Something must be wrong in my life but I can't figure out what. Or maybe not. Maybe my brain isn't working correctly. Not sure how anyone can help. I'm just desperate (again, but worse every time)

I'm just going to snap here cause nothing makes sense a anymore and I can't fight my thoughts and feelings. Ban me if you need to. I don't know what to do anymore. Fuck words. Fuck humans. What are they so proud of themselves ? Words are nothing. Thoughts are nothing. What a joke. All wrong. Something's not right. I've reached an end. Human activities and thinking are not satisfying anymore. My whole soul is itching, there's nothing else to do. I'm speaking like I've seen it all but it's not even that. I didn't. I'm probably the person that have seen and done the less things on this forum. Yet I say all this. But it's true. I feel it, the world is dissolving around me, I don't even know how to explain all of this. I don't matter. I'm sorry. Angry vent. But it has to get somewhere even if it's useless. If you can still feel things and like things, please cherish this. Every second. It seems like I can't anymore and it's the absolute worse feeling. Goodbye. Maybe. Probably. (No worries, no suicide. I'm too weak for that)

Don't put anything on a pedastle.

Thing I've always had like 4-5 things I'm passionate about up to the point I'd want to make it my whole life, but now that's gone...I have never had the qualities to direct a business. I'm too air-headed for that. I don't seem to have the patience or strength for art anymore (that is, beside a bit of playing here and there but never finishing things). My hobbies I still do, but they seem to tire me more quickly than before, I jump from one to the other but never find the practice of those as nice to do as the idea I have in my head or the memories I had from my past.

I have been recommanded medication (sertraline), but due to huge medical anxiety, makes me afraid, knowing there are frequent secondary effects. And, further than that, some people do seem to regret taking them (or other mediction for depression, anxiety or whatnot), cause they didn't felt like themselves in a way to put it simply. Plus hard to get off those I belive? But also, I fell like 1) it's me giving up and being lazy on solving my life And 2) putting a band aid on a broken bone and not actually fix the problems. Kind of like numbing myself to make me believe my life is ok, when there's still (probably) something deeper I need to understand about why my life makes me that unhappy (I am probably hiding something from myself or not realizing my lifestyle is totally wrong for me or something) Sorry, I know the usual answer for depression is "take your medication", so I probably sound very annoying and stubborn (which I am)

My need for success is dead (I gained a bit of fame this past month on social media and it doesn't even feel good so what was it that I wanted this whole time when thinking about this? Also I don't even feel like doing art, I never had anything to say, my brain doesn't work). My need for love too. I barely even want anything. Nothing, even my former passions, feels good for more than 30 mn anymore (and even then I'm still kind of detached) What the hell do I do now? I was wondering if screens weren't playing a role in all of this. I'm basically spending my life on those. But then if I give it up even entirely, what then, read books? Isn't this also just another for of escapism, or being with myself only? Maybe then I become smarter? For what? I don't care about humans anymore. This feels terrible. No desire is the worst. I don't even want to numb myself anymore. I want to be stupid and insensitive.

Bad in a way, I rarely wake up refreshed, and when it happens, my batteries run out quickly, been like that my whole life Doc made me do some test, last one left is for sleep apnea, appointment in...one year I know, but lately it's getting worse and I feel like I have no desire for literally anything

Feels weird to me But I know realistically that's the best chance at this Sadly I don't think so There's also another problem currently (she wants kids and I don't) which is making me question how the relationship is still working, but we do like each other and despite concluding that the only thing we could do is divorce since I'll probably never change my mind about kids, it's so hard to split and none of us wants to do it. I know this is ridiculous...) 44 yes yes (but less than before)

Not sure how to answer this right now cause my brain is mush and my english is bad, but I was never very material or scientific at all Very air headed, emotional, passionate, mostly about art, I guess that's the big picture?

Certainly But I think some tech do have bigger potential than other to change our lives This could easily be one of them, more than crypto (not dissing it tho)

So I was watching a fascinating absurd movie, and I was wondering why I love movies that much, what they actually are. My usual preconception came out : movies are a way to connect with other humans. Humans use the cinematographic language to say something or just transmit a more abstract feeling. But then I felt it (instead of thinking it) : (most) movies are not a depiction of real feelings or situations. They seem more mystical to me. I can't explain why or why I'm thinking that. But movies are something different. What are they? Why am I so much connected to those? Sorry, these are weird and vagues considerations. I just had to put them out if my brain into words cause something seems to elude me in my live for movies and su can't understand what bothers me that much despite my love for cinema.

I am dumb but that's not the point. You didn't seem to read my post. But I'll clarify. I was saying to give up if AI scares you so much that you can't find a way around it. Obviously the intent is not literally asking you to give up. It was formulated that way to shake you up instead of complaining that AI is stealing jobs. I also did make the distinction between commercial art and non-commercial art. But anyway. I people to truly love art will find a way of doing it anyway. I'm not worried. It might just become harder. But who cares. It will be very interesting tho to see how humans, and and their art, will end up adaptating around these inescapable changes There are still many different outcomes possible.

No such specialist in my country But To be honest I don't think the video game addiction is actually my deeper problem It's just used to cope, avoid, not feel or be lazy If it wasn't video game, it'd be something else I don't think video game itself is worse than watching movirs or whatever. It's more about... How do I live this experience and Hats around it in contrast

It's very weird for me, I do manage at times to be healthy by dropping bad addictions and implementing good habits, but usually it doesn't last more than...one month? And after that, the backlash can be pretty fucking long and harsh. For example last month was perfect. Exercise 5 days a week, started reading again, not a single unnatural thing in my stomach But here I am today, barfing on my third croissant today and playing fucking Overwatch mindlessly AGAIN (I had manage to uninstall it for maybe 5-6 months and it felt good. When I was not doing something more productive than video games, at least I was playing newer solo experiences instead of playing an ego motivated competitive game) Sometimes I fear I'll never be able to drop this kind of cycle. It might be a bit too late for that. Maybe some people are just here to be fed and I should stop thinking that I can fight in one way or another. Or maybe my brain has been destroyed by a childhood and years and years of adult hypnotic addictive content. But even if I admitted that I'm jsut an addict, I tried to fight that as far as I could, but still, here I am. Not sure what else I can do.

I do love ASMR but I gotta admit that I only watch asmr from women and I'm not attracted by male doing it. Now, this could be a purely esthetical choice in termes of sound, like, I also prefer female singers just because it's, if you consider the voice as a musical instrument, and if you average things, kind of liking the "female voice instrument" more than the male one, which is not worse than prefering a saxophone to a tuba. But I also suspect that there is some form of lust and horniness in me liking female voices better. Or typical sounds produced usually more by female than males (long nails tapping, female shoes asmr...but I'm kind of a feet/shoe fetish so...I mean it doesn't give me an erection to listen to this kind of asmr. Uuuh sorry, thinking out loud and trying to understand if there's more to it than just being horny and feeling intimate with a women in some way haha)

AI is a challenge. Learn how to fight it with your art. Or give up art. Or don't try to fight on a commercial level, and just do art. Whatever everyone is crying about will still happen. Adapt in one way or another.

At a certain point, just a few books by month, the tablet (considering this rather than an e-reader) and e-books become more (or same) sustainable as their paper counterpart. A tablet vs books give a less cluttered space. Buying books can become addictive. Shiny objects. In a tablet you can change the way the book displays if you want, and take note easily. You can't damage an ebook. The only con I can think of for tablets is that it might not be a good thing for your eyes? But I couldn't find any certain source about the fact that it can permanently damage them. Also, blue light and its impact on sleep, but then just stop reading one or two hour before bed and it should be ok? That being said...I'm actually trying to convince myself. Because I like traditional books. But I also know it's not rational to keep my huge libraries and not just sell everything to make some money and get everything in one convenient little thing.

I'm discussing cold facts, but the answer really is only what actually works for each individual in the end And the more I talk about it, the more I think doing a bit of each, paper and ebooks, might be the better way, I should really stop being so extreme and think that I have to tend to what the absolute best is supposed to be. But that was an interesting exercise to think about it/

Health : I have 2 heart conditions but so far nothing to be worried of, hopefully I can pass the checkup for many many more years. I started eating more healthy a few months ago and have been on a roll, also evercising 20mn a day, 5 days out of 7, almost never missing one Might not be a lot for people that actually do sport a lot, but at almost 44, I'm happy I got back on track instead of staying in my hole of lazyness Finances : i bought a house with my wife, but I'm paying big for it 23 more years. Otherwise, I'm surviving I guess. Going out a few times, buying a few books here and there. The house started showing a bit of problems, but they're probably managable, otherwise we'll just end up selling it and get something more solid even if we have to go smaller Otherwise, got a car I paid for and 7000 € on the side in case of trouble (not fearing medical trouble tho, as our country's healthcare is basically covering everything) Personal development : I've been stuck for a long time. Consuming a lot. Creating occasionnaly but never getting very far with it. Working gigs or with teams definitely makes me anxious, so my next step is to try and find a way with solo art, which seems to be the way to salvation for me Career : survival job. Night shift only but gives me lots of free time while at work. Will try and see if I can use art to make a bit more money on the side but not hoping too much. Will probably keep my basic job and try to find myself through art and make myself proud/keep myself entertained with it Relationships : I love my wife. But I also feel like...she's not one to push me higher. She does support me. She just has a very different personnality. Sometimes it frustrates me. She also wants a kid and I don't. All of this has been squeezing me hard lately. I have to think about this honestly. I'm afraid to go either way. Biggest pressure on my life right now. Self care : I'm ok I guess. Doing the best I can with what I know of. Home : yes Life : Feeling a bit stressed by being this old and being stale. But also, levels of energy and motivation obviously declining with age. Honestly, I'm kind of frustrated. I can't seem to just enjoy doing basic life and I don't seem to be made to have some kind of succcess either. Sometimes I just wanna clean everything and hit the reset button. But I'm pretty sure, considering my worth, that I would go nowhere. So i'm trying to strive with my situation. But this is hard and I never seme to be happy for very long Free time : Very fine (another reason why I fear having a kid. Pretty sure you have to erase yourself from existence so you can raise him properly)

"absorbing better from books than ebooks" I've been looking at studies but nothing seems to point to how much better you do absorb. If it's like 5%, who cares. But hard to say how much it does impact. "there's a physical experience from paper books that you don't get with a screen device (...) so much going on with a phone/tablet" Ok but what if I have no problem focusing on reading when I want to? Also, we all a phone close to us at all times. If you can be distracted, you will be distracted. As for the feeling of paper, I do like it too. But is that because we grew with it? Does a kid that reads on screens even cares about the paper? Aren't we just suffering from nostalgia and not being objective? "Physical library at home is tied to better education for kids" Well, for one, you do need to want kids for this to work But also, if I ever have kids, and even if I don't, I'll keep a library with my top books or something. As for having ideas when you pass by your library...never really occurred to me. I just think "oh, I want to read this", but this also works on digital by browsing my goodreads library or something. I might sound like I'm playing devil's advocate here, but I do think Ebooks seem to have the advantage over paper books. Maybe the answer just lies somewhere in the middle. As I was saying earlier, I can very well read ebooks, then if I love a book, buy the paper version so I can give money to the author, and have what I like the most on display at home. Maybe something like 80% ebooks, 20 % books, or something.

We literally all learn for other's stories We're not that original Also, the industry is already doing copy-paste with great success (if we only talk about money and success) Plus, we will were considering IA will stay what it curently is, thinking of ourselves as superior This to me, seems a bit pretentious and human-centric Lastly, you're talking about writing, and even if this may be replicated we'll enough so that mist people don't fare about consuming this of a humans doing... What about illustrations, or music? Most of it has no soul anyway, most people don't care about depth or who's behind it.