Sabth

2025 ♣️ 31 Dec 2024

What should I do? When i woke up, theres suddenly sparkling pop sound in my ear. My right ear. And then it became worse. Of course something do happened before but nothing like it. My left ear was just fine. Its only my right ear.

It's only because I'm free from it now that I can write about it. Except that it's a mind, history or whatever. This is dangerous. Even if I write the word history it will be brought back to that. But this wasn't like rape. R is like mentally forcing you (me) sabth. I shouldn't do this to @Someone here Anyone , whom have had my influence would be my responsibility. That's how I felt. *I had influenced Constantly feeling like this. Yesterday. And while I was sleeping they still... Would hv read me (?) and do something according to it. Nucleic .

@Someone here I was mentally forced out of my mind , so they become me? Imagine if you are a human being with all knowledge in your mind , or your self. They can empty your mind and fill up your mind with themselves. Rape.

What even is that? You'd hv to fight. Fight for your life , fight for your Truth. Or Reality will just kill itself. This , is certainly not what I wanna bring forth /appeared like.

I am born neutral /masculine. Until after i took art. Mentally im a stereotypically a man but im a woman. So whatever that is i am is a woman. I am very feminine. Just a t instead of a feeler. But ive been raped recently so i cant say for sure. Even before even if i had become more of an f than a t it was still within myself. Reason. But not until those raped me. Whoever they are i became as ugly as they are.

-disappearing into thin air -reincarnate in different part of the world -animals -if youre whole youre lucky -into peoples images(if they see you then they had a part of you in themselves like living in peoples minds) /other new life -new life are killing you. -turns into many (hell) depending on who you are. or where you are from it might be different. and depending on who writes in your memory.

There are many things that i didnt write about in between And make the conclusion.

🥲 There is the body of someone I love. But it's hollow. I have let them go. I have let their spirit go. So what's left are just some strangers. And they didn't even know it. Wouldn't even realize it.

Just a Little disconnection. The last few days had been a little crazy and today I wake up feeling disconnected. Not that it’s wrong , but there’s so many should and shouldn’t. 12162024 3:09AMx

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I would dropped a bomb. But i dont think they will do it again.

or it could be someone else.

Of course theres something that i do differently before. . . . . it has just come out , right before you write this. its not wax

I think nature is God. I don’t viewed pet as God but real nature like birds are God. And not the usual thing that happened everyday. When it is unusual. There was also a time when I believe in God when it’s non nature. (My default mode had always believing in God btw.) Then not. it is my fault for not practicing. (A part of it) Before that, there was a time when I had felt like I can’t do it anymore. Not when I’m sick I think I’ve been pulled and instead of forcing myself I think I should hv followed my intuition or what feels right. Idk. Because it did do more harm than good. Anyway, Thinking about the pain I’ve felt, there was a place that I don’t wanna go to anymore. Idk. Because back then in 2020 there was a time when I have felt like I don’t wanna leave home anymore. And I wasn’t enjoying it. (When I do leave) (My heart was splitted) No i hate rain. i woke up at 10+ pm last night and thought that i hate rain . It was raining more heavily than ever. And i somehow know that rain is nature. But it is somehow still artificial and man made . So i wasn't affected by it much/ anymore. Or was it I hate God? Idk. But i don't like it everytime. The time when i used to enjoy rain and morning air (everyday when i was young i would wake up just for that to not miss the morning air) and when i used to walk in heavy heavy rain i think nothing of it and not being scared of rain. Somehow in 2023, there was a time when i had forgotten about it too. But now its still in my mind. I am not anywhere near innocent. So stop trying to be like a God to me. i should have write this after splitted* “I have cl in my mind” she somehow gets me together, in order for me not to feel like im losing myself. If anything i would do something for her. (If i went to a show it was because of her) i was listening to her. And later when they uploaded the fam picture on the island, it feels like they had taken my position. Like they had becomes the daughter. That's how it feels. And they seems happy . Without me . i was having fun too i walk a little bit and if anything it was just for that dish that i went there. At least theres something good in it. And later, years later i feel like there’s something i missed and would wanna go to the island/beach. But theyd never bring me to anymore. The season is not right , etc. No matter how much we went there. and now i no longer wanna go there and there are places that i cant go to anymore 2020 the memories and pain that i felt (physical) made me not wanna go back (2023). What if you're asking for it? You want to have that again? I doubt it. That pain that you’ve never felt. Its only for me btw yk , your mind can be twisted, maybe i shouldnt do that. Stop trying to be God because God to me is that thing which arent human. So I can’t act as if I didn’t know why they are no longer here or disappear. today or last night everything went back to the past. Of course I didn’t like it but we’re becoming lower. Everything that happens make it worse. Idk Like the previous one are better than the next. I wish to not go further. Like yesterday, I dream that x was still looking through that thing. (Omg) in the past everything was normal. It wasn’t like we hadn’t done it before. But this time, comparing it to my previous night dream, it was a whole lot worser. You can’t act on behalf of me cuz you are not me. Even though my spirit might be in you. Just be yourself. Why do you think it’s a lose for me if I write this? -yesterday- But the dream that they have access to are only the dream that I have told them to. -today- .

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12:22am So , is it true? i am in danger? i saw someone like a ****** person being all mad. Like who the f are u? (As i said . I'm going back in time. Lower and lower. And yesterday, i wonder if i had any danger awaiting me as i eat something that i know what it is. So , ~) Yk, . And whatever that i say or do will be seen and some ****** people will act like they are entitled to me . That's what's happening to me now. EDIT : When I edit this ⬆️ , the Satan said Ily. I said lower relative to me , not going further lower. &Lowest. ⚫ " 12:22am So , is it true? I am in danger? I saw someone like a shitty person being all mad. Like who the f are u? (As I said . I'm going back in time. Lower and lower. And yesterday, I wonder if I had any danger awaiting me as I eat something that I know what it is. So , ~) Yk, like I'm going lower and lower . And whatever that I say or do will be seen and some shitty people will act like they are entitled to me . That's what's happening to me now. " Copy, paste , like I'm going lower and lower It seems like this is what Satan do not like. I'm feeling normal now. When I wake up. But when I sleep. Would you rather die? Or live in hell forever? Your life path had been taken by others like they can get to your past and your roots. It's undeserving for some people but

What I meant was , there is a difference , between wild animals and domesticated animals. Like those who are free (like in the air) are more convincing to me that it was God than it is a human's animals. But it's true. Those are the lowest. If I can't explain it I draw it. This morning the consciousness in the form of birds , I remembered it was so loud as if there were hundreds of birds outside but because I was scared I didn't look at it. And later I would think that I would have taken a picture of it. Or recording it. But because I know it is unusual and it only happened because I write about it, so I won't look at it.

Well I don't know what danger would befall me.

Went "lower" and "lower" in heaven. Everyday felt like a low er version of yesterday. One time you're cruising. If you remember what have happened before, the better. Because it's higher. . Dec 22 4:19 Well I don't know what danger would befall me.

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941pm They are changing me tryin to make me or others the three members of x. It wasn’t good. But someone had to do it I guess. Idk. They dc. While I was talking about r, they bring about something else. Should I go ? But it’s all fke. 12:11am now they are channeling my distant fams/relatives spirit. Or at least that’s how I felt. What gets to me. Is it better if I became close to all of em? (Rel) I am becoming more distant. (Not only rel)

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