Sabth

To be an artist. To be a skate videographer. (And a pro skater) And to be a travel vlogger/film maker. these are the things I wanna do?

Anyway, now I'm back. *White*

Now cl. She's very famous throughout Asia. (Filtered) If anything , I would go for her. I love "some" of her songs. It is always up to date. Trendy. And she had been a consistent singer. I may have changes in my life, but she never change. Always producing. So I can't forget her. Even during my worst, she always release her songs. *In the name of love album* These are her newer songs : (I don't love all of her songs) but these are the good ones. I'll be her guardian angel~ Idk they appeared in my dreams a lot. Even though we're different. We're not strangers... (Filtered)

Kyaaa Stay With Me !! >< But I'd rather watch their old performance video than his now performance as an old person.

Actually I don't like him anymore because he's married. But seeing this again, I still love his old songs. Really. (But not his newer songs). I was in high school and this was so good. ? This was good too. I was in my foundation studies.

I already woke up now.

I am not matured enough for all the job listings. Am I skipping steps now? Is there anything I should do like a pre-requisite before I could start working seriously , any jobs? Idk what suits me or what I'm capable of. (Since I never work with the outside force) I only had done like a business selling flowers and ice cream as a group project during my university . But even that, I did as a team. That's all I ever experience. I can create work for myself but would need a lot of money to start off. I don't know. Is it normal that I only felt confident to be self employed? And I don't feel confident to do works for others. Because if it turns bad it will be bad for others and not just affecting me . While if it's my own I can do things at my own pace. If it's good it will be good for me. Idk because I haven't learn everything to it's completion. So is a university course a must before I could have practical/intern/work? Can I really not work without having a bachelor's degree or training? I feel not ready. I may have felt comfortable with works that is using your body/appearance like modeling or stewardess . How should I even start?

A dream ends as soon as you wake up, while real life remains real as it is.

If the United States love Israel so much they can take Israel to their land/country and let the Palestinians lives in Palestine/the middle east.

I've never had experience and never know how to work or to make money how can I make this amount of money? I want something that I can do.

Look at this, this is where I left : But I didn't graduate. I have completed 102/124 credit hours. Does this count? I actually haven't completed the green one. It's something that I do. I want to take another course.

@Princess Arabia now I'm lol ing. Anyway, I would never enjoy reading back what I've wrote. Except the $23k ones and my lists . I am not proud of what I've wrote. @Schizophonia Shut up you little kiddo. If you've got nothing good to say just shut up! I'll wish you one day you'll be in the position I'm in. . I didn't know anyone in my state (around me). I couldnt look for work.

Right now I have two of my nephew/niece watching a skits at 10:36PM in my room. We're already about to sleep. And I feel so bored with my room. Actually this house is already destroyed after the renovation (to add a few more rooms ) I think I will only like it if I put a Tutankhamen sculpture in my room to make it more vibrant. Or else I'm bored with my room. With no activities..

I've never had a boyfriend or be in a relationship. I never work since Ive finished high school till twenty seven. I never completed a bachelor degree. My sister got married when she's 22. And now my younger bro is getting married.. Am I missing out on life? I don't know. While my age is increasing, I never felt ready to have a child. But the more I age, will it be harder to have children? Though I never felt ready. I'm struggling with basic survival right now. Like my life isn't right. I am still dependent on my parents. While I want to be independent. And they aren't taking good care of me. So I want to be free and independent . But I didn't know how. Like I want to travel..and I want to go out. And I want to live life normally ?❣️ I couldn't drive. When will I be ever matured up be an adult? I don't wanna be 28. That's old. There's no reason I still had all these problems stuck in these at 28. So I wanna settle all these when I'm 27. ?

At least they are good in one. I have neither.

.

What's normal, following the path. After high school, graduate university, get a job, get married, get a better job, get a home, get a child etc. Could drive by 18 etc. Which I hadn't had.

The last time I read a book was a long time ago. From what I can remember : RISALA ANNUR by Said Nursi THE JOY IN LOVING by Mother Teresa THE LOST SYMBOL by Dan Brown I have other books too but I don't really like it.

I want my portfolio to look good so I had to be careful in choosing my path. Of what I want. It better be good. Should be what I want..

I see that people in the middle east are richer than the average people in my country. There is something about my country that make it seems like it's very traditional. I see those in the middle east are very modern. And like cultured. I wish. At least rn I have put on information on my linked in. I wish to get better at all the skills that I had

I only feel productive in 2011 and 2014. The rest are just me forcing myself into a box and preserverance. Which clearly didn't work. I also like 2017 for some reason. But that's only it. Right now my problem is, I just stay at home and has no opportunity to go outside. My parents aren't bringing me anywhere. And I am just trapped. I don't have freedom. So how could I even start? Idk. I am trapped. Asking my parents to sent me to a university? (I had much more freedom when I was studying in a university). Get someone to hire me? Moving to a different country ? Working ? I don't have access to all these currently at the moment.

@Raze my past had been stagnant a lot. My brightest years are when I was 15 (2011). It has only going downward the more I age. Eighteen was a slightly better years. But it's going downward. 2016 was also good. (For being young). But I was struggling with my university. And since 2020 I just had been doing nothing. I don't work. Or do anything.

No Jesus is white. Moses is black.

Then did you created the earth and all human beings?

There are like an expired artist going to Sarawak. I want Gd instead of Taeyang. Taeyeon instead of Hyoyeon.