Sabth

I wonder if our eardrums have ruptured yesterday..

Now I wonder if my father had been hurting all these while. I have yet to see him since last night. So I don't know. Idk his reaction or his experience. I have messaged him immediately.

I have more and more regret in my life. how good was my life before this night. My ears are good. I am in good comfort. I'm healthy. Now... It's still painful. Hours have passed by.

I will live by my own term from now on. You can't predict what you didn't know. So I don't know. I will always prioritize my comfort from now on. It is a sign. That something is right.

I wish it didn't happen.

Even though , I would like to get a perfect score, I regret going to the mosque tonight. The first half was good. But then, when they changed the person, it became too bad. I wish for a heaven where everything was just soothing and ideal. I wish for such places. But now that my ears is no longer good, I don't know what to say no more. Everything would be useless. It's too late. My ears is already hurting. Only if today didn't happen~ . No amount of good thing in the future can change it. It's already destroyed.

Damn . They're ruining my ears. I would never expected that my ears could be damaged going out tonight. My ears is still hurting. I'm better off at home like this. Never happened before to me. I always take care of myself. Damn. I wonder how others could take it. Or are they all ruined? Not worth it!!!

I shoulda leave sooner and protect my ears~ 🙄

Now my ears still hurts😡

I never go to a concert, hence never ruined my ears. But today, the mosque ruined my eardrums. So I had to go back. It was soooo bad. Too too bad. Not gonna risk my ears. But I already stay for a while then. ☹️

.....

That is the end of my life. I shouldn't be living now. NO I SHOULDN'T.

24th December 2022

I am so bored.

Curse be upon those who took my things. Curse be upon those who took my things. Curse be upon those who took my things. Curse be upon those who took my things. Curse be upon those who took my things. Curse be upon those who took my things. Curse be upon those who took my things. Curse be upon those who took my things. Curse be upon those who took my things. Curse be upon those who took my things. Curse be upon those who took my things. Curse be upon those who took my things. Curse be upon those who took my things. Curse be upon those who took my things. Curse be upon those who took my things . Curse be upon those who took my things. Curse be upon those who took my things. Curse be upon those who took my things. Curse be upon those who took my things. Curse be upon those who took my things. Curse be upon those who took my things. Curse be upon those who tooke my things. Curse be upon those who took my things. Curse be upon those who took my things.

Well, at least this singer is releasing a new song for 2024 :

Really my life is no longer exciting right now after my things had been stolen. A part of me. Unless if I could travel, or work, or going to a different country or living in a new place, I don't think my life is doing well. I am in a bad circumstances right now. And I no longer like to be driven by my sister. She used to drive me back then. But now I only like to be driven by my mom.

I just bought these. Like the ones I had once.. But I think I'm getting older. I had so much to write about back then. But now. I don't know. I want my mind to be filled. I like myself back then. I like my writings. My notes. My life. My everything. But now, I'm empty minded. There's nothings to write. I don't know. Maybe notebooks aren't what's excites me any longer. I used to be so full of arts. I created a lot. My life was fun. I am always filled. Huh? I should get to do something.. but now I rather like clothes and appearance. Things that I enjoy more.

To start over feel like dying to me. It was so hard. I went back to buy all the things I've lost. (Without the writings and without the drawings. Only tools) But it was so hard for me to recreate my arts. It was things that was lost forever. It will never be the same. Around eleven months ago, I bought things that are of sentimental value to me. But I can no longer create art. And it's not even one percent of what I had back then. They no longer sold a lot of things. That I had back then. And today, I went to that shop again. I bought things that are like the stolen things from me. But it's empty. And to start again feels like dying to me. I write my business idea before. That information is what's important. But now it has been stolen. So now I only had the new one, book that I buy. But it's empty. I had to start over. This one, I had one of it each. But my diaries? They no longer sold those books. I can't find it. It used to be my favourite and I bought each after each when I've finished writing it all. Books upon books. I do have a lot of it. But now.... 😔

Can I make $2135 a day? I would be a millionaire in my currency if I could make $2135 a day for 100 day. ♣️🕶️

If only money would be easy as this to get ~

Day 1 - 1% done.

I want to have a daughter. I'm afraid that I couldn't get one.