Schizophonia

No. I eventually had several nightmare with the mascot of a french insurance company (Cetelem) lol ; I found myself isolated in the dark without being able to find my bed, and suddenly he was running after me like a screamer. I also had a dream with him once where we were jumping in the painting and it was strangely erotic.

Why I understood. You conceptualize "trauma" as a cyst that should be crushed even if it hurts. That's wrong. Maybe eheh. Some people like Matt Khan or Ken Wilber was very spiritually advanced at a much younger age than me. Am I going to see a 13 year old computer geek kid explain to me that he can't explain python to me because 'you're a kid, you live with your parents' lmao. This is absolutely ridiculous, an ad personam (invented, because you don't know me) because you can't stand my blunt way of saying things and interpret it as aggression. Both have nothing to do with each other ; And actually being "nice" doesn't make you an effective therapist. I did neither. That's why I give you my time, but you prefer to see it as a help from people who please you. Of course, you are one of my mirrors ; There are only messages for myself and if I am showing you it is certainly because there is still a part of me that would like to play what you do. The only way, basically, to not have these insecurities is to be under general anesthesia. You can't believe that there are men who talk like men, that is to say particularly direct and firm, and that it has nothing to do with crushing anyone. I'm actually gentle compared to a number of guys I hang out with. I basically don't have issues anymore, that's why I know what I'm talking about. I behave the same way irl and here. What you think of me doesn't matter, you can judge a tree by its fruits.

Pov : When you don't listen mom and eat the garden's trombone-shaped flowers.

You don't want to stop suffering because you are too attached to the idea of gaining energy by capitalizing on your supposed past suffering. That's why "traumas" last (which seems paradoxical at first), traumas last because people like it, because there is a secondary benefit : That's why you made this topic on "how to deal with", there is nothing to answer to that which has not already passed in your head and you know it; The real reason is to expose your victim character, to be complained and to think to gain energy. So from there, anything that might make you move will be perceived as negativity or even aggression and that hurts your ego's business. I could do people pleasing, be "positive" and actually push you to keep ruminating constantly even at 33, to believe that you have to correct yourself with exercises, psychedelics or whatever; Until something quite serious happens to you. I really want the best for you because that's what you're asking for deep down and it costs me nothing, but then everything I say will sound negative because it will break your ego. If we were together irl, it could even be even more radical; I could yell at you/intimidate you until you agree to adopt new habits and change your persona. If I regularly seem teasing, it is precisely because I accept being moved, and that is probably why I am in better mental health than you at more than a decade younger, and in better mental health than a certain number of people on this forum as well, although you are still one of my mirrors. As you wish

My pleasure darling.

Driving a car is dangerous too.

The worst is already completely available here and now.

Do you see that stamping yourself "stage yellow" doesn't change the fact that you're a stage blue who's having a tantrum and wants to cut ties with his family, because they don't agree with him on something; His mother because she just said in a slightly disappointed way on Skype "you're still not going to church? it's good though". What is perceived "outside" is the projection of your being; what you are is the world that you are (perceive, to become dual again). For something to be transcended, it must be included. Consciousness courses are the structure, not the content; You can be Christian and yellow; you can be New Age and red course. I think you're some blue-collar asshole throwing a tantrum because his family is Christian and he thinks it's stupid.

Seven years ago, I moved 1600 km away from my entire family and started my life from scratch, but sometimes it doesn’t feel far enough. After deep psychological and emotional work, I decided that cutting them off completely—no Skype, no calls—was a necessary step. The only person I kept in contact with was my mom, and she's almost fanatically involved in spiral dynamic, deeply influenced by her actualizers surroundings. After about three months of no contact, I decided to call her on Skype yesterday. We had some surface-level conversation at first, but then she subtly shifted into shaming and blaming me for not involve into stage yellow, among other things. I'm 33 years old, but this still affects me, showing how deeply family roots can stay embedded in our psyche. At my core, I’m currently an christian, but I’m far from transcending my reactions to this new age BS. It triggers me hard, and I’m aware of that. I feel like I shift into jesuit really quickly when she starts talking about Actualize stuff, thinking: *I am not Jesus Christ, Buddha and Allah themselves, leave me the fuck alone!* I know that I should remain grounded, but I haven't mastered the emotional storm this brings. Probably a complete cut-off is necessary. Has anyone else gone through something similar? I’m just looking for some understanding from people who’ve dealt with the same. How do you manage to not let these new age triggers pull you down from your center?

Everybody.

Intuitively i would say because you like having problems to solve, things to un-twist.

Wait a bit, i've clicked on your signature and i came across a bresilian hottie with a large palate, big breasts, and who speaks Portuguese very quickly. Mhhhhh... 🤔 tilttheheadtotheright*

What a moderate person.

Lol. Maybe the b1 mega dose, or even the b12 (increases norephedrine, which can make dreams look vivid).

won't do it* Décidément. You can experience the worst horrors right here, is what I meant. It seems like here you are essentially motivated by your persona with a superiority complex.

Everything is polarized and contains the possibility of the worst and the best.

Lol. There is a difference between switching to a new egregor that is a little more wacky than the current one, and becoming completely psychotic.

How do you do that ?

My bad mistress, i would do it again ☹️ 👉👈

☹️ Idk, it depends if you’re system ; Only you can know if you really want to that.

Everything you trust becomes true so you can shift to this egregor. But if it’s just to « put spice in your life » you risk to just do not trusting it enough. So it won't go there, and you'll even manifest pretentious atheists to debunk all that lol

David Lynch movies/series ?

Not yet, 176cm is a big frog, it's going to take more than a butterfly trap to catch it. 🤔

I am not overwhelmed