Schizophonia

I sometimes have horrible dreams, especially when I force sleep with drugs. The common point is that it is regularly attacked/destroyed, with the implication somewhere that it is a tribal war. I've always had problems sleeping (not necessarily infomnia, but "night owl"), and hypervigilence. 1st example: I dream that I am sleeping, but suddenly my house is attacked by armed people, and I am about to be killed in a murky, almost psychedelic atmosphere, extremely high in adrenaline. 2nd example: I am in my house, and a black person is trying to break in. I knock him out several times but he ultimately comes back with armed friends, and I have to fight them. 3rd example (this night): The pov is a kind of camera, I don't know who to identify with. I understand that I am in the middle of the Rwandan genocide and suddenly, I see someone being brutally killed in the street. The Hutu had a sort of short machete and repeatedly beat someone's skull with all his might until he broke it, the unfortunate man was in a sort of trans because of the pain. I could try to do a classic Freudo-Lacanian analysis but that would only tell me where I am currently in relation to the energetic issues involved, not their origins. There are other dreams, it always revolves around the same racial war scenario, and now I have surprisingly precise information ("Rwanda war").

You have accepted to eventually debate with me, you are my mirror who have a serious profil picture and play the « workalcoholic », self development persona, something like that. I would say to this mirror (you) that living like that tend to make you actually look more weak and feminine. In fine to feel happy but also masculin and strong, you have to be more yin, in other world be social, to party, vape, to wear jewellery, to paint, read heroic fantasies books, etcetc, do more the « monkey » lol. Even meditation btw. You also have said that you used racetams and tobacoo, but at long term acetylcholine seems pretty bad for mood and even lightly exitotoxic.

Btw, the time i was the most funny and attractive to women where when i was on Mirtazapine (strong antihistamine and adrenaline antagonist).

I think low stress response and therefor the « energetic abundance», « energetic wholeness » are the core of masculinity. The guys that I’ve seen with the most pretty chicks was actually typical strong flegmatic rugbyman with dadbod. Gymrats obsessed with there apparence seems often having issues with women, or their women are pretty ugly lol. I don’t know any bodybuilder youtubeur where i am who has a particularly attractive wife lol, and when their are together, their wife don’t seem very… satisfied ? It looks like their double is « meh ». Do you see that too ?

My general practitioner is nice so she gave me an ordonnance It has a bit singular pharmacology that makes it particularly efficient but other antihistamines are good, i sometimes use Doxylamine. Actually each time i say myself I must go to sleep around 10pm but i procrastinate. That the true reason lol.

People can’t take naps anymore and even develop insomnia because they have insidiously shifted to an over exhausting energetic world. When you are children, you don’t have responsibilities, you eat what you want when you want (in the limits of possibilities)don’t necessarily do sport or any stressful things, daydream about love, have eventually love, are mainly preoccupied about playing with friends… Then, when you growing, everything can become more serious and overwhelming.

I go to bed around 23pm. If i have been stressed, i eat an häagen-dazs vanilla, an aspirin and some cyproheptadine to break the hypervigilent small voice in my head and trigger the feeling of sedation. Really efficient and way more healthy than benzodiazepines.

It’s too long and evasive, it hurts my eyes. Concretely are you into her ?

The fear of hurting your relationships with others ? 🤔 @Leo Gura

It would be the equivalent of an hysterical women lol.

No, you're not an nihilist at all, you have said yourself dont want having children because of what you consider ethics reasons. If you were nihilistic you would not mind about what could happen to them. Now, from my pov, you play the persona of the "guy who do the rights things" or something like that, maybe you would benefit of changing for, let's say, a more impulsive, adventurous and egoistic one. I mean that you can success to absorb energy through him with your posture "Me, i don't give children life while life is so hard, i'm not egoistic, i'm not irresponsible, blahblahblahblahblah", but in a more holistic pov, in fine you are unhappy with your life.

Sometimes things are pretty simple.

Ahah, again someone with a questionable kink 👀

Will be in life what will had to live. Tbh, i just don’t really mind of what my children will live. I just like the idea of being a father, share things. Also i don’t see the difference between taking care of an adopted child or having your own one, except ego. I admit i don’t want an adopted child because of egoistic but atavistic patterns, it’s like that. Just my 2cts

Yes, i want some 👍 Why don’t you want procreate ? Lol. Daddy will make you some cookies 🍪

gne gne gne

Because you have said than psychedelics are useful for neurogenesis.

post in the same time lol

Congratulations

No, she do what she want, it's not my problem. Everything i say is that she has putted herself in a delicate position. Surviving by being f***** by random peoples is very alienating. I could say as much with plenty of modern jobs, in different ways.

There is no others factors that levels of stress (which will influence the level of aggression of the sexual fantasies) and the strategy to deal with (which will determine the dominant/dominated position).

That's true, sorry mistress 👉👈 English isn't my natal langue, so i sometime make mistakes, yes.

I'm here to become one of the most conscious humans of all time

A big psychedelic trip will maybe increase neurogenesis by a few hundred of neurons in a days. If you have brain damages you want an increasing which is counted in at least hundred of millions. Joe Dispenza achieved this sort of thing by putting his patient's nervous systems in specific states through meditation, guided by EMF scans. In general, the recovery of the CNS, whether the brain or the spinal cord, is very delicate, and it is essentially a matter of triggering a state of high energy security. Raymond Peat spoke about T3/T4 and progesterone (even for men, maybe allopregnenolone could do the job ? or 5a-DHP?) for recovery from nerve damage.

It's not that psychedelics are particularly neurologically harmful and therefore trigger neuroplasticity to "repair the damages". Every drugs that will discord consciousness in a unusual way will increase neuroplasticity, because brain adapt itself to a new paradigm. Even going on vacation will improve neuroplasticity. Psychedelics are not effective to trigger neurogenesis, it will not repair the brain.