Schizophonia

I see. 👍

Just approach others with friendliness and interest.

Cringe.

How can you be that sure ?

Day 17 I barely slept today, probably because of latent stress: A lot of rumination, bursts of limiting beliefs and fears in general. I even relapsed in the hope that it would help me sleep 🤷‍♂️, I think it helped but it's a shame. The "damage" is done, ho'oponopono, I'm resuming my retention. Something special happened, I had a particularly psychedelic and generally strange lucid dream. I don't understand exactly how it works yet, it usually happens to me without realizing it when I fall asleep at a particularly late hour like say between 4 and 8 in the morning. Joe Dispenza advises doing his practices around these hours to obtain a mystical experience because of memory, the state of brain waves and the concentration of melatonin, which makes sense. So as I was saying, I entered a strange psychedelic state with a higher degree of consciousness, a greater omnipotence. The first thing I did was compulsively, for some reason, provoke a bad trip; I had the image of Marge Simpson (don't ask me why lol) who was screaming in a rather horrific nightmare vibe and, suddenly denying my creative power, I wondered why this is happening? What is the point behind all this? Why are you doing this God? And suddenly, as if I had regained awareness of my power, I decided to "go elsewhere" with my consciousness. Somehow I ended up switching to more emotionally neutral visions based on machine scapes, or rather modern art visions that seemed to be generated by an AI. Suddenly I see that all this seems in reality to be a projection in a movie, from memory there is what seems to be a juror or spectators, and a voice tells me, to the real ego Valentin (it is still a lucid dream) something like "If you manage to master this, you will win everything" or "If you manage to master this, you will explode everything (in the sense of going up)". The third scene is the one where I am the least lucid, I am present in a luxurious Thai massage parlor and a worker offers me a formula that includes French kisses on the cheeks, it is weird but I accept. There was a formula that explicitly proposed sexual relations , but it was only available on Sundays. The last scene finally took place in what was supposed to be my sister's apartment; There was a scenario with my mother and sister that I basically forgot, but this time I was both lucid, aware of being in a dream. Anomalies started to occur like the appearance of wacky entities; there were cats with only hind legs, and human body parts like women or feet that were walking around. It wasn't hostile, but it was scary to experience and I always had the temptation to try to wake up; I was torn between this temptation, and the will to stay out of curiosity. At the same time as I walk around the room and do things, a voice in English comments on what is happening and gives me advice, a bit like in the game "The Stanley Parable". One of the advices I remember was "Valentin shouldn't turn on the light, to avoid visualizing things that could scare him more". The dream ends with me needing to go to the bathroom, and on the way there, lots of cats obsessively throw themselves at the door when they see that I'm going to open it, and I wake up in confusion.

Where do your familly cames from ? I don't see a rise of a belligerent far-right in Europe, just a response to mass immigration; In fact people are voting for more security. Almost no one wants Nazism or Bolshevism anymore, I'm sure the next problems will be of a different nature. 👍

You confused your estradiol pen with 5 MeO DMT.

I sometime used it to learn psychoanalysis.

Day 16 I've been very interested in nutrition since my sophomore year of high school; At the time I was quite orthorexic and afraid of gaining weight, so I wanted a diet, or a way of eating that would guarantee that this wouldn't happen. I was actually a little overweight in middle school, it wasn't too bad and it quickly went away with growth, but because of some bad experiences and my tendency to obsess (which has dulled a lot in recent years for some reason, to the point where I now consider myself more detached than the normal person on any subject), it was enough to twist my relationship with food and the body for a while. So I peeled what was available on the internet, to the point where today I must know basically all the diets and their gurus lol: -NPC balanced plant based diet (dr greger) -The more orthorexic version of the precious one (Fuhrman) -Plant based HCLF starchivore diet (McDougall) -Plant based HCLF both high sugar high starch diet (Durian Rider/Freelee banana girl) -Plant based HCLF fruiratian (Doug Graham, Robert Morse, John Rose...) -Plant based HFLC (Markus Rothkranz, Lou Corona) -HCLF omnivore/Vertical diet (Stan Efferding) -Keto (Eric berg, Sten ekberg) -Meat based Keto (Shawn Baker, Chaffee, Bart Kay, Robert Klitz...) -Meat based with carbs, primal style (Aaujus Vonderplanitz, Sv3rige, Tufano...) -Meat based with carbs including starch (Paul Saladino). -Paleo Diet (Julien Venesson). -FODMAPs free diet. -Ray Peat Diet -Doing anything (Vegetable police 😅) Obviously I haven't tried them all, I'm not that mentally ill 👺, but I've experimented with some of them over time. The worst experience was a diet high in starch and low in animal products, especially with lots of beans and grains (or pseudo grains) competes; Made me basically stupid, lots of brain fog to the point where I couldn't pass my driving test as was planned at the time, and turned me into a human jet pack so much that I could get gas, you wouldn't have wanted to be my girlfriend at that time👺 ; It's not very sexy but it's the truth. In fact it was so bad, that I sometimes had attacks of colitis here and there in the evening, I sometimes finished my philosophy class in the last year of high school (it was the class of the week I finished the latest) by bending over because of abdominal pain. All these different problems resolved themselves when I completely stopped these foods, no matter how I tried to prepare them. The second serious experiment was a "meat based with starch" diet, a bit like Paul Saladino does today; It was already much easier, no abdominal problems and a great calm, whereas during my vegan experience I was regularly angry and disdainful. I finally stopped because of the cost and the food diversity, I like cooking, and I don't want to stress too much about food anymore, and in fact even if I let people do what they want, even if I leave them royal peace, well in fact I find it ridiculous to lower oneself to that; I don't want my life, my nervous system, my limits to revolve around something as anecdotal as food, especially when like me you come from a country where food is greatly associated with a moment of pleasure, sharing, even art and a country where more or less everyone knows how to cook. All I have been able to observe concretely is that consuming too many legumes or dairy products (especially from cows) caused significant intestinal and cognitive problems, as well as eating a diet that is not "nutritious" enough in general. Eating too much saturated fat seems to cause headaches, but this is a correlation that I observed without paying too much attention to it at a time when I was interested in Ray Peat, so it may just be bullshit. But it's not only with food that I played, but also with medications: Obviously psychedelics, eheh, but especially sedatives in the context of my severe insomnia. Benzodiazepines, "light" gabaergics (Aswhagandha...), trycyclics (Mirtazapines), atypical antidepressants (Trazodone), antihistamines (Cyproheptadine, Doxylamine...), taking gelatin to "suppress serotonin" (which makes no sense, a ray peat bullshit), magnesium, zinc, taurine, or even high doses of metalonin.... These are all traps, immediately; From the first dose they will screw up your ability to fall asleep the following night by rebound effect, regardless of tolerance, and will re-enrich sleep anxiety ("what will happen if I don't take the medication tonight?"). So I no longer take any supplements or even less medication, for all the reasons I have given or tacitly suggested previously. The only two supplements I take today (I lied🫨) are a multivitamin and mineral ("All-in-one" from PureEncapsulation) and omega 3 EPA/DHA/DPA supplements based on algae. The only health-oriented angle of view that interests me at the moment, by extension of my interest in Neville Goddard and the law of attraction, in solipsism, is the work of Joe Dispenza. I love Joe, uncle Joe is basically an athlete who during a cycling event (probably triathlon, from memory) fractured his vertebrae and became basically disabled. He was supposed to have an operation that was essentially just to reduce his pain, but motivated by his readings on esotericism, in particular the famous book "Autobiography of a Yogi" of Paramahansa Yogananda he decided not to do this medical intervention and to try to repair his spinal column himself via visualization and meditation exercises, by "calling on the source at the origin of everything" to paraphrase him. It was successful, now it's not so much that it works but he is at the head of a company that allows thousands of people around the world each year to reverse extremely serious and often supposedly irreversible pathologies through the same teachings, such as autoimmune diseases, terminal cancer, disabilities, invertility, a stroke that has exploded part of the brain, etc. etc. Joe Dispenza has the most rational approach possible to try, by his own admissions, to seduce the most skeptical people; so he will generally rationalize his results via work on brain waves and epigenetics, but he is actually fundamentally a non-dual thinker perfectly in agreement with the statements of monist people like Leo Gura. Joe has tons of testimonies on his youtube channel, it's incredible, probably in the top 3 of my influences in recent years.

There is above all an epidemic of laziness and brainroting by youtube, tiktok...

No problem, you're sweet. It should be possible at the end of the week, I'll see.

Ai isn't smart enough for now.

For classy otters. Yes. I was given a taste of something sweet with saffron, I found it vile. 👺 A kind of toast with a mixture on top from what i remember.

It looks good but I don't like saffron, if it's like what I ate at the Christmas market. 👺

I see. Good appetite

I’ve never seen anybody who has prolonged karmic evolution just with psychedelic including 5 MeO.

They look great 👉 It is also with almonds or it is for decoration ?

Wait until OP find out Shilajit 😏

You're right, many people don't socialize enough and we're not the same irl as we are online; I myself am systematically calmer and simpler in real life. But I don't want to be too dramatic, I see that most peopl are starting to become aware of this problem. What I wanted to say is that despite the problem of loneliness, I also see a "drying up" of certain karma which is in fact much more serious over the generations. I don't know if it was the world war or something like that that caused an "energy whiplash", but here in the boomer generation and generation x there are a lot of extremely mentally ill people; A lot of rape, humiliation, or physical violence in any context. Everyone in France knows someone who was raised with joyful like "you're good for nothing, you'll end up under the bridges". Modern generations often seem more mature and stable, and there are also fewer problems with alcoholism, smoking and drug addiction in general.

courtship display* Jk

If we refuse to collaborate with everyone who has a shadow or simply who does not agree with us, we will quickly end up sucking stones in a cave.

Don't hesitate to show us the result 👍

Yes. Not a big deal.

Absolute terror.

You have a normal willingness to talk about what I can see from my side.