manuel bon

Hello friends! I'm not a coffee drinker, but I really like the taste, especially if combined with milk. I got interested in its good effects after I saw some videos from Michael Pollan talking about it, and I like to read his book: How Caffeine Created the Modern World. I want to start drinking it but not be dependent on it, my mom can't start or live a day without it, and I don't wanna be like her. So my questions to you are: How much coffee do you drink? Are you addicted to it? Which is in your opinion the perfect way to take coffee regularly without being addicted to it, but still get the good benefits?

Well first of all coffe increases blood pressure, it doesn't reduce it. Second of all it might be insignificant to you, that doesn't mean that it is for everyone. Also, that can be a small good things that along other good habits contributes to a healthy bodymind. If it's not extremely significant, it doesn't mean that it can't give benefits, or that I can't have "concerns" and ask about it on a forum.

Many times in my life I started keeping a gratefulness journal, but every time I stopped. This time I have a goal: to keep writing at least 3 things a day I am grateful for. It doesn't matter what, I just have to do it daily. I might write what I'm grateful for something that happened during the day, or about my life in general. It doesn't matter, as soon as I keep doing it every day.

I'm grateful for: Being consistent with YT having practiced already 1.5h today doing the meditation today having a great girlfriend

🟠⚫ How am I doing? About the last days. I am feeling better. I started practicing again, meditating, doing the Gateway experiment, and doing more activities in general. I'm happy about all of this. I'm taking small steps, and trying not to force too much. Today I did force myself, since I will work from 14, I need to get some things done before that, so I wanted to be productive. Actually I just noticed that I was planning all of my things as if I had to work at 13 instead of 14, which is kinda funny, but I'm glad that now I have more time and I don't need to stress too much. I will now study for the craniosacral course, and then record some guided meditations to upload on YT.

I decided to start a journal; I want to be motivated to do it, so I am publishing it here, intending to share things about myself, not only so I can keep track of multiple things, but also so you can get to know me. Here I will document everything I am involved with in my everyday life; I want to make the journal organized so it's easy to read for anyone who decides to open it and me. I will write about my spiritual journey, the search for my life purpose, new experiences, emotional healing and growth, my road towards financial freedom, my mental and physical health, and my relationship with the people around me in my life. I want to share interesting quotes, parts of books I like, or that resonate with me, and my ideas about whatever comes up in my mind that can be significant or not. How it will be organized: Every post will talk about a specific thing, and at the beginning, I will add a color that will represent a specific topic. Here I leave the list of topics with respective colors. 🔴 = Relationships, Family, Sexuality 🟠 = Mental & Physical Health, Emotions 🟡 = Money, Financial Freedom 🟢 = Spirituality 🔵 = Psychedelics 🟣 = Life Purpose, Career 🟤 = Quotes, Books, Websites ⚫ = About me, Goals, Ideas 🔘 = Contemplation I hope I was clear enough with the explanation. Thank you for reading and being present with me towards my growth, healing, and ultimately self-discovery!

🟢 GATEWAY EXPERIMENT - Wave 1, Release & Recharge 18/10/2024 11:30 DAY 27 I did only half of the audio. I don't feel bad about it because I don't want to punish myself for not wanting to do the whole thing, but I want to feel good because I simply did it, even if not fully. I worked on releasing my sadness.

I'm grateful for: Having such a great day yesterday Starting taking photos with camera Not being so cold

Idk where does this come from? Wtf is this comment anyway

🟢 GATEWAY EXPERIMENT - Wave 1, Advanced Focus 10 17/10/2024 11:30 DAY 26 Today I didn't go as deep, probably because this exercise is pretty basic, slow, and I am already used to do all the things the audio says, without it's guide. But still I'm glad that I am keeping the practice up, and I want to keep doing like this. Tomorrow and in the next days I will do from the 4th track on which are deeper.

I'm grateful for: Having practiced guitar Doing a great activity with my gf Buying cute plants

🟠My ideas based on Chat GPT: I will live by the day, and see how is it going; about today: I will start by practicing at least 30 minutes of guitar at a time. It can be less, but still, I need to be as focused as I can. The goal is to practice at least 1.5 hours today, and with time slowly build it up, and be able to play a new piece in 2 weeks, for the next class. 30 minutes of craniosacral study Gateway experience for relaxation between the studies only 10 minutes of guided meditation is fine! in the afternoon I go with my gf to a painting/poetry place for students

🟠🟤 Chat GPT Responds to My Previous Post: It sounds like you're navigating a difficult space emotionally, physically, and mentally. You're aware of the things that need your attention—like studying, the Gateway Experience, craniosacral course preparation—but you're feeling disconnected from the energy or motivation to actually engage with them. I hear the frustration and the sense of emptiness you're experiencing, and it must be challenging to feel like you’re not able to connect to sadness or other emotions that might bring relief. It’s also common to feel out of sync when we’re not living in a way that aligns with what makes us feel good, like your preference for waking up early and feeling productive. It’s okay to take things one step at a time. It sounds like there's a desire to "snap out of it," but your body and mind might just need some gentle understanding right now. Since you have been taking breaks from studying, maybe the next step could be creating small, easy-to-manage routines that allow you to slowly re-engage with things you care about, without pressure. This could include: - Starting small with the Gateway Experience, perhaps just 5-10 minutes of meditation or Focus 10 exercises. - Dedicating short bursts of time to studying, so it doesn’t feel overwhelming. - Continuing to eat as healthily as you can manage, while allowing some flexibility with social eating. - Creating small moments of joy or relaxation throughout the day, whether it's listening to music, taking a walk, or doing a simple task that brings calm. It might help to give yourself permission to feel whatever comes up, even if it's numbness or confusion. Your emotional landscape might shift as you begin to gently re-immerse yourself in these practices that usually help you. How do you feel about starting small like this? It might also be helpful to talk to someone who can hold space for these feelings, whether it's a friend, a counselor, or even writing more openly. You don’t have to have all the answers or solutions right away.

🟠⚫ Emotional State from these days So... Lately, I haven't been feeling great. I am, to some extent, taking time for myself. But... Also... Well, honestly, right now, I don't feel rested. Like... I don't feel like I took time really for myself. I took time from... From studying. Studying both for school, for the conservatory, and for the craniosacral course. Which... It's not the best because I should be studying and I have the course in a couple of weeks. I am not going to stress about it too much. I will still start doing all these things that I need to do also because, I mean, I have to go to classes and I need to be prepared and I need to be on time with assignments and these kinds of things. But still, I don't feel great about all this. Yesterday though, I went out and I had fun and it was nice. But now that I woke up, I felt, I realized that I don't like going to sleep so late and it was not extremely late. It was like probably around 1 am. But still, I am not happy about it. I don't feel good going to sleep so late and waking up so dizzy. I prefer waking up earlier and being productive. I mean, I am not like procrastinating right now but I am still... It's tough. It's tough how I feel. It's tough with my family situation. And it's difficult emotionally because I feel sad. Actually, I would like to feel sad but I don't feel sadness. I feel just empty and I don't know how to let myself feel sadness. I know I am conscious. I know I am aware of all these things. And to some extent, this does console me a little bit. But I would love to get better. And I am trying. Or am I? I don't know if I am. Really. But I hope in the future I will be able to feel better and slowly start feeling my emotions. I am also really lazy to do work on myself. I am not doing the gateway experiment. I am not meditating. I am not doing stretching. I am not taking care of myself. I am kind of eating healthy. That depends on whether I eat out with friends, which happened a couple of times. I am not doing anything. I feel like I am always complaining to other people about my roommate. He is always really dirty. And our friendship was really based on smoking weed. And now that I don't smoke anymore, I really don't appreciate so many things about living with him. But it's fine. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know what to do with myself. I would like to relax a little bit. Emotionally, physically. Really be able to let go. I do this guided gateway experiment and in those moments I am able to really relax and kind of let go. But still, towards the end I am always like, okay, let me take off my headphones and continue doing nothing, watching a movie or whatever. I am struggling but it's fine. It's fine. I can handle it and I know that one day it will get better. And actually, before November, I need to get started with studying the Cranio-Sacrale and the practice. So this is the right moment to do it.

I'm grateful for; Having fun today Being on schedule with my YT videos Being social today Painting Trying to relax

🟢 GATEWAY EXPERIMENT - Wave 1, Release and Recharge 16/10/2024 10:30 DAY 25 As I said yesterday, I went back to the first wave, and it was a good decision. I managed to do the whole exercise greatly, and actually I had a strong experience of expanded consciousness, and it happened pretty spontaneously and quickly, that was not the intention of the exercise, and not even mine. But still, is fine. I'll keep doing the 1st wave until I get constant great levels of relaxation and expanded awareness.

I'm grateful for: Making up with my gf My dad slowly starting to talk more

🟢 GATEWAY EXPERIMENT - Intro to Focus 12 15/10/2024 15:30 DAY 24 Today before doing the audio I took 4g of Green Kratom. I haven't taken Kratom in a long time, and I remembered that this plant makes my mind think more than usual. That disturbed the whole practice, not in a crazy bad way, but still. I didn't have any great experience, and that's probably because I haven't been doing this experiment as a daily practice. I'm not feeling great emotionally, and that makes it difficult to keep up with the practice. I will go back to the basic relaxation exercises to deepen them, and also start again with daily fixed practice.

Thanks for the nice explanation

@Ishanga I did not listen to the video, but from what@Asia P said: "you should make your whole life a meditation", same way as Osho says. In my opinion, all the types of meditation are great, and with those we should combine present moment awareness, make our whole life a meditation.

It's unethical on a professional level

How old is the student? Average student is not so mature. And also how would you feel if your partner (teacher) treats you like shit at school (because that's how they do with other students), and then home is great? There has to be a professional relationship between any teacher and student. Once you're in a romantic one, the professional relationship goes out the window. So you want the relationship to be only in your house? I wouldn't want to hide myself and partner from the world. Remember that in most places this relationship is not allowed, so you can't even go to a bar without being paranoid. Or you can also be chill about it, and then face the consequences ofc.

As a teacher you shouldn't be biased when it comes to exams or these kinds of things; and if you decide not to be biased, that can affect negatively the relationship. Many schools don't allow a student-teacher relationship, where I study a teacher isn't even allowed to go for a coffee outside of school. If you're classmates know you're in a situationship with the teacher they will most likely make fun of that, or simply be more distant. Idk how unethical it can be, but for sure it has many disadvantages that "normal" relationships don't usually have. The only unethical thing that comes to mind is the first point I made.

How do you work on yourself on MDMA? You just lie down and close your eyes? That's what I do with psychedelics, but I wouldn't know how to use md

🟢 GATEWAY EXPERIMENT - Intro to Focus 12 12/10/2024 19:15 DAY 23 Today I didn't manage to go as deep as in the last days. Again, it's probably because after the whole day of work, I'm exhausted, and I can't fully do the exercise, but in the morning I didn't have enough time to do it.