Sincerity

Here's what I advise you. Disregard the veganism/animals for a moment. Think about what you live for in general. What do you currently want to develop in life the most? What energy/trait/value? What do you wish to become the most? This profound, general inner reason could be the answer to your veganism motivation, and other things as well. Random examples: "My recent struggles and experiences in general have been requiring from me that I develop FOCUS in life. I want to be FOCUSED. How can I use this reason towards veganism? Well, since I really care about the animals, I want to be FOCUSED on what I care about most and thus I WILL stick to my vegan diet. I'll do it for FOCUS. I'll do it for ME, because I want it the most in life right now." "I really want to develop WISDOM in life right now. I want to be WISE. That's what life has been leading me to. How can I use this reason towards veganism? Hmm... well, I really care about the animals and I realize it is wise to follow my heart and my truth in spite of intrusive thoughts and cravings. I want to be WISE and thus I WILL stick to my vegan diet, because this is respecting myself and otherwise I will feel shit about myself in life, and I know that's not worth it. I'll do it for WISDOM. I'll do it for ME, because I want it the most in life right now." I deliberately tried to come up with traits that don't necessarily have anything to do with veganism on the surface. But here's the crucial insight: when you have a profound inner reason for being, you can rationalize pretty much ANY action with it. You just have to convince yourself towards using a certain energy for a certain thing. You literally have to carve a path in your mind - from an energy pool to a desired behaviour/action! And you CAN convince yourself of anything. This is very profound. In short, focus on what YOU want about YOURSELF the most and then go from there. USE THE ENERGY WHERE IT'S PRESENT! Do with this advice what you will. Might click with you, might not. This is my wisdom. Good luck.

Then find what you feel you do want to develop in you. Find personal reasons. Or fight an uphill battle forever with external motivations. What I said about love was an example.

It is technically "for yourself", but it is less appealing than doing it for literally yourself. There is a difference between "I love animals" and "I love developing my love which is the core of me. I fucking lust after that sweet energy and growth. God, please help me change so that I can be more of myself." "I love animals" seems harder to focus on. You probably have to visualize animals being killed to motivate yourself or something. Whereas with the focus on your love, you focus on something more positive and deeply personal.

"I love animals" is quite a weak motivation, in my view. I find that the best reasons to change are for YOURSELF. Don't do it for the animals, do it for you. Meaning: you can do it for love, if that is a persistent core energy in you, but that doesn't equate doing it "for the animals". You can do it for developing YOUR love, the love in YOU. Get what I mean? "For the animals" is an external motivation. I find the strongest motivations are internal, not depending on external circumstances. You want to build up traits in you that do not depend on anything out there and you can just bask in whenever you want. Do it for YOUR intent to be loving, good, disciplined, focused, healthy, etc... Whatever YOU care about developing about YOU.

Sorry to see you go. But there's no "democracy" on the forum. The major banning/unbanning/allowing to stay decisions are 95% Leo's will. The other 5% is eg. users being banned due to accumulating 20 points, us immediately banning their duplicate accounts, etc.. Mods won't just slap someone with a 20 point warning, that's Leo's domain.

Stop and ground yourself. Do normal things. Do something fun. Deconstruction is not all there is to life, and doing it too soon can be harmful.

Of course you don't have to overcome EVERY one, and you won't. Should have mentioned this in my original post. You will feel callings to let go of certain facilitations at some points in life though and when these callings come, it's best to act on them because they are callings for the growth of your character/energetic system. The facilitations are often very addictive and hard to let go of though, and it's easier to convince yourself that the callings are just irrational, crazy thought and should be discarded.

Yeah that's kind of true. But also in a sense you have more freedom to focus on your purpose when other things are taken care of for you. Facilitations are there because one isn't ready yet to transcend them. So it doesn't necessarily mean that one is "a slave". These "restrictions" are basically self-created.

I'd certainly not go into any "spiritual career" anytime soon. Yeah, facilitations.

I'll 100% be proud of this decision on my deathbed. And I'll make more like these I'm sure. I want a life that's lived, and not just be a slave of comfort and patterns. I want my skill and the truth of me to be a signal to the world. I'll build up my portfolio. Fuck these companies. Thanks for the comment though!

A facilitation is basically when responsibility for something is outsourced for you so you don't have to care about it. Society is one enormous facilitation self-created by its members for everyone involved. The responsibility of being a doctor, lawyer, politician, farmer, guy sweeping the street is outsourced for us. But the even bigger facilitation (within facilitation, within facilitation...) is the mind and all of its structures and illusions/deceptions - which are THE facilitations! When you're under an illusion, the "other side of the illusion" is outside your conscious responsibility and so you can live your life without giving the slighest shit about it. And then reality itself.

I think "visible reality" is the ultimate facilitation. A facilitation designed to help you see energy/spirit clearly, starkly, manifested; to help guide you to independence of mind. I think no facilitations would be what we call death, or God.

Thanks! For now still working my corporate job, and in the meanwhile focusing on building up a new self-willed creator/worker/doer energy (which I feel is arising in me with time) which will be my new engine for the next years/decades. Trying new things, new creative projects, looking for a niche which would suit me for now.

What kind of news/info are you consuming? List any sources perhaps?

And you depend on them until you're mature enough to be able to live without them. I've been racking my mind trying to find words for how to describe the following phenomenon. There are facilitations set up for you when you're not ready yet to be independent in life. Some of these are rather wisely self-created by society to eg. propel young people and have a "safety net", and some are on a much deeper mind level. Examples of these facilitations: Wage slavery, your job being doing what you're told and that's it. This is literally still being a kid in school Parental support A romantic partner (a facilitation in reality for you to develop love, grow yourself, etc.), family, friends, "people you can talk to" Structures in the mind propelling you towards actions, instead of being self-energy-reliant (note: I do not mean acting on your whims, I mean having built yourself profoundly as an energetic being with core energies you can always rely on) A general perception of "others" General sanity and unawareness of the deepest energetic processes, reality's self-creation You can live with facilitations all your life but if you're developing yourself, your spirit will be calling you for something deeper. You'll need to let go of these crutches in favour of independence. Letting go of the training kid wheels on your mind-bike gives you the chance to develop CHARACTER - or your energetic system. That's what the game is about. Example from my life: just this month I quit college even though I was on the brink of finishing it. I want no title. I will not be judged based on some dumb ass certification for fake jobs for fake people. I told my parents I was grateful but I will live my own life only and I'll do whatever I want. I want to have GENUINE skill and energy and instead so far I coasted through the education system and seemlessly got a rather good job in a big company. This is not life. This is living on crutches. Disposing of the training wheels (when you're ready) is good. Don't settle for comfort. Be courageous. THIS is the spiritual journey. This is what life is about. The journey of you. You'll find that you can ride the bike perfectly fine anyway.