Sincerity

@Leo Gura Since You're impossible to reach through DMs: there's a big typo in your blogpost. https://actualized.org/insights/actualized-quotes-039 (first word) Peace. * * * * * * * * * * * * @Andrey I love Schwarzenegger too. I feel very inspired by him.

It's hard to look at oneself from the outside.

Cute little things. I'm no better than any of 'em. All one big mirror maze. ? In Mexico it is believed that if two mirrors are put in front of each other, it acts as a threshold for the devil. Oh humans, hahahaha. Mirror, mirror on the wall, who's the wokest of them all...

Cool!

I think we're through with this thread. Just a reminder: (copy and paste from the guidelines)

@Dauntment Be aware of your projections please. Nothing immature about OP's post.

That's okay. I get it must be really difficult for You. But You're gonna make it all okay. Have faith man. The mere fact that You're really trying speaks so well of You.

You feel like such a sweet soul. Have faith, You'll muster up the strength to make any changes You want in your life. Everything is going to be okay. ❤️

@trenton Oh, I'm sorry bro. ? Good luck on your journey!

Consider You might be angry with yourself because You're angry with him. If You didn't hate him, You wouldn't be afraid of your (supposed) similarities. Consider You might have a lot of unexpressed resentment, blame and grief towards him. Unexpressed emotions make your mind go crazy and your body tense. I encourage You to give the book Radical Honesty a read.

Who does?

I know it's very easy to say, but try to forgive him. For your own selfish benefit. If You don't You'll keep carrying him in your mind forever.

Logan, one of the movies I could watch anytime and be interested. I've hurt people too. You'll have to learn how to live with that. They were bad people. All the same.

F a l l . You are alone, Child. There is only darkness for You and only death for your people. These ancients are just the beginning. I will command a great and terrible army and we will sail through a billion worlds. We will sail until every light has been extinguished. You are strong, Child. But I am beyond strength. I am The End. And I have come for You, Finn! Ngl, I'd love to have the power of bringing people to their knees with one word. The line "I am the end and I have come for you" puts the fear of God into me lol. The Lich is awesome. I know it's silly fantasies, I'm just having fun posting this. Every once in a while I think about the show with great fondness. I love Adventure Time.

I love that Hallucinating song haha. Talking to myself in a loving manner is becoming the norm. I feel really loved by myself. I'm there for Me at last and it feels good. I've been expressing a lot of anger recently. Three days ago I was tripping and at some point a lot of anger arose in Me and I started screaming into a pillow so hard my throat hurt - FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Did that like 4 times and proceeded with the trip lol. I've been angry with myself for many reasons. Not knowing what I am, disappointing myself, lying, ignoring important aspects of My life. Crafting a detailed suicide plan one month ago when I was at my lowest. Fuck. The last one stings the most. I mean not so much anymore I think because I expressed a lot of the anger already (working through it step by step everyday) and tried to forgive myself but yeah. It may still be lingering there, idk. I wanted to share this for the sake of honesty. Now I'm feeling better, cleaner, happier. I'm more motivated from a place of love. I'm being more expressive with people, genuine, peaceful. Things are looking brighter. I'm reading Radical Honesty right now. I love the book, read over half of it so far. It's inspiring Me to express my emotions (especially anger) openly with others and not lie about shit. Like I'm lying to my family about my psychedelic use, forum use, all that stuff. I won't expose everything all at once but I'll do it in small steps. First I'll tell the truth to my sister. Next to my mom. Next to my dad. Baby steps + I'll do it wisely. I'll certainly practice these conversations first in my mind. It'd be nice if I lived up to my name, right? Because so far I've been Insincerity in so many ways, I feel. Fuck that, man. I wanna be Love itself.

Please don't change the topic to Andrew Tate guys. Stay on point

The coyote was not AWAKE enough for him. kidding I changed for the better a lot in the last 2 years, my relationships with family members became much more love-filled so if I told them that I used psychedelics as tools for change in a safe manner I imagine they'd come to terms with it.

They don't know. I will tell them soon though.

Winter, this year. I was on a walk when I suddenly got the urge to take off my coat and roll in the snow. Had to prove my devotion to intuition or whatever the f***. Two weeks ago. Intuition told me to take acid at midnight (& focus on consciousness as hard as I can), family sleeping in their rooms. I was told everything would turn out okay and it did. I often get the urge to stare at things for a long time. I can interrupt a walk and focus on a stray cat or bird for half an hour. Staring so hard my vision gets wiggly.

Sooner or later I'll be back though. For sure.

I miss Home, man. I'm Hallucinating.

Not saying this can't happen, but You can mitigate it by being honest with yourself, not relying on beliefs, expressing yourself authentically with others, etc. There was a time when I felt very isolated. Fortunately, not anymore - if You care to know. If I BELIEVED myself to be the only conscious person in existence I'd be a f&*#ing idiot, to put it frankly. Because it's not about belief. Do You understand this? And there's no reason why I wouldn't be talking to You. I could still talk to "anyone" and do whatever. Like I'm doing right now. Sorry, but You show You don't know what You're speaking of. I don't give a damn about the solipsistic worldview and its assumptions. Rest assured I'm humbling myself down everyday. Just mostly not in front of humans.

Don't be ignorant. I love my family and friends too. And I'm "in the illusion" most of the time. Just now my sister entered the room, she's buying herself a beer for the first time lol. That doesn't mean quack. When You're conscious enough, You can see through everything. For what it really is. I'm not conscious of it right now btw.

That You're Alone haha. You're the only one.

Leo said, Razard said... Where's your authority? These beliefs ain't doing You good dude. I'm not denying the truth of aloneness btw. But You're not conscious of it right now. You're talking distorted memories.