Sincerity

Locking as per OP's request. Don't spend too much of your precious time engaging with bs, people.

Consider that others might actually be doing the work and awakening instead of endlessly mentally masturbating like You. You just switched what You're parroting now. You are hopelessly arrogant and closeminded. You're learning virtually nothing on this forum. Realize this for God's sake. What are You doing here? A pigeon will awaken sooner than You. Hope You're happy with that. (Unless You change your attitude of course)

?? Well, my best wishes to You.

I think You omitted a big part of my reply. Well, it's a shame. Did I say that? Cool story it is obvious that your bias is so great that it prevents you from understanding that and many other things. try to free your mind from bias, otherwise this work doesn't make sense

You don't know, because if You did You wouldn't be judging him. And we aren't talking on no "relative level". It is not impossible for You to be conscious right now that Jesus or Buddha are merely your imagination. He (supposedly) realizes this and You don't. And You're shitting on him. Is this description reality or your projection? I don't see it that way. There's something about YOU that You don't like here.

You guys, I personally don't like that Razard is posting so so much and I don't even read most of it but to be honest Y'all who are shitting on him are the bigger bullshitters. Comparisons to Jesus or whoever are totally understandable when You know what You really are. And yet You're treating them like heresy. You're putting your imaginary figures on a pedestal. This just shows You have no familiarity with the profound states from which these comparisons are completely valid. Sharing your insights with "others" is nothing damning too. Yeah he's doing it a lot and the great volume of it may be unhealthy but that doesn't invalidate his awakening. Have some god damn compassion instead of being crabs in a bucket. He's probably gonna mature and You're still gonna spin bullshit with your crab mentality. And if You say "I am God" is a show, You clearly have no idea what's up. Crabs being crabs.

Yup

I think there's nothing wrong in watching some porn. And I'd say it okay for a man to watch porn when in a relationship, as long as he's transparent of course. I understand having a high drive. But paying a live pornstar with which You interact and getting attached to her while having a gf... AND lying to your "7" about everything... bruh. Did this really have to be spelled out for You? You're being heavily dishonest to your partner. Also, your attitude towards the opposite gender is worrisome.

Lol, if only it was about just watching porn. You are paying a pornstar for it and trying to dream about her lol. Exactly.

An example of a post where it only gets worse as You keep reading. You should tell the truth to that poor "7" You're with.

Damn, that's really beautiful.

solipsism ?

❤️ You don't even have to carry "yourself"... Good point, You're right We have a very sweet and honest relationship. Sometimes she may respond in a grumpy way for no reason but I can take because I know she must be agitated because of something else. I don't need her to change that. I think I see your point though and it's true I want to fix her sometimes. I don't want her to make foolish choices, get in dangerous situations, not study for a test out of laziness, etc... Yea, I won't accept that and I'll urge her to act differently - because I care, and I think it's okay. I mostly do it in an uninvasive way though and later she's thankful for me being more strict with her. Sometimes she's a lazy slug (just like her brother) and she appreciates the motivation. But of course I don't accept a lot of things about all sorts of people so yeah your point is perfectly valid. I agree it's very challenging.

But You have it in You to let go That doesn't mean leaving them. And there's nothing wrong with loving someone. But You can sort of let go in your mind and surrender to the awakening more when the time comes... and accept death, or rather overcome fear of death, and the fear of leaving your parents, which I'd argue is part of dying. You might have to spill a lot of tears to get to this. I know I had to about my sister - A LOT. And it might be really difficult for You, but You can do it. It's pretty much about ACCEPTANCE. Last time I awakened 2 weeks ago I actually managed to finally overcome the attachment (it arose yet again), accept "death" and let go... and "the outcome" was indescribable. So yeah, it's possible for You too.

I can resonate too. For me, attachment to my sister has been one of the strongest forces keeping me from letting go.

I went to my dancing classes for the first time in 2 weeks. I had so much fun. This was the last song we danced to. It's so bittersweet... I felt really sad hearing it. It reminds me of my immature nature of wanting the good stuff and rejecting the "bad". I wish I could accept everything.

The more conscious I am (my state varies), the more motivated, disciplined, intelligent, creative, accepting, peaceful and authentic I am. I find that being more awake & grounded in that state actually tightens your grip on day-to-day reality. You're literally MORE AWAKE. And day-to-day reality is, well... REALITY. That's what You're awake to, after all. And yes, life is much easier. Note: here I'm talking about being more awake "soberly", as in not after intaking a drug. I'm pretty sure living from a state of being mindblowingly awake on LSD is not sustainable and yeah You do lose the grip on daily life. I recognize I'm making a distinction between sober and psychedelic-assisted awakening but well, to me sober awakenings have been the most grounded and allowing me to enjoy everyday life, so... sue me haha.

How accurate and charitable. ? Thanks dude, lol. Maybe we're all NPCs after all. (kidding)

A three letter word comes to mind, starting with 'Y' and ending with 'OU'. I won't bother elaborating. First You say You don't know, and then in the next breath You talk like You do: You've made so many obvious unfounded assumptions in your first post (especially about Leo) that initially I just rolled my eyes and decided not to say anything. But here I am, saying something... Well, my final message to You here: You have it in You to get serious. So do, if You care about knowing what You are at all.

No, I don't think other people are NPCs. That's an utter misunderstanding of what solipsism or Aloneness refers to. You've been told many times how to go about this work. Seek the truth of what You are - directly, in experience. Thinking and believing stuff won't get You there. Thus, get serious at last.

It's not about belief. Or "buying it". Get serious.

To be clear, I was joking... ...Are You joking tho?

Hard to stomach that Andrew Tate is more awake than Y'all? Accept the facts guys.

I reached such an utter low that it started spilling out of me and my family became worried about me. It was evident that I was not well. Later on during a talk with my mom I just kind of mentioned that sometimes I felt like I was going through hell, that I had terrible mood swings and was feeling hopeless in general. She said I should have told them sooner (I never did before) and offered to pay for my therapy. She gave me emotional support - as much as she could muster. I had mixed feelings after this conversation because I've never opened up like this before and everything was happening so fast. Me going to a psychologist?? Because of mental health problems?? What the fuck?? Next day my dad went to talk to me and also said that I should have told them, that they would pay without a problem... he also said that he's been treating himself for his own problems for years (wtf?) and that he had stupid ideas in the past (WTF????). And also he told me that he loved me. While feeling loved and a bit relieved, my ego also took a hit and I had a mixed reaction to all of this. I felt I should be able to take care of my own mind myself. I felt I should be above this. I felt I couldn't consider getting out of this as MY accomplishment if I didn't do it on MY OWN. I wanted to feel unique, I wanted to feel self-sufficient, I wanted to feel like it was MY journey, MY achievement. Me, MEEE, MEEEEEE!!! And then I realized where these feelings were coming from. I was scared. I was afraid of letting go, of dying, of being nothing. I tapped into that fear which I became oblivious to and stayed there for so long, driving myself crazy, going absolute fucking bonkers on myself and spiraling into a dark and hopeless void. And when I became conscious of all this... I felt truly relieved. For the first time in ~2,5 months, I felt some genuine peace. I've had moments of relief during these 2,5 months but this time it was different. It's like I really saw through what I've been doing all this time. I was so lost and confused... but now I'm hopeful it will get better and better. AND I will still go to the psychologist, obviously. I think it'd be stupid of me not to. It's an opportunity and I'm gonna use it. And yeah, after that day this peace has been pervading my experience more and more. Today was sweet. My curiosity has been reignited, I said some sincere things to my family members which warmed up our relations, I've been appreciating the beautiful day and my existence... Drank a nice coffee in a new place and contemplated there. Good stuff! I'm excited for what's coming. I'm bouncing back from the backlash phase. I will further awaken soon and it's going to heavily impact my everyday life. I feel it in my bones. And I'm going to work for it. And in the end I will accept EVERYTHING because, well... I am _____.

Okay, I see your points and I have nothing important to add. Thanks for a nice exchange of views!