Rocky

Im an 18 year old mechatronics student from the UK studying in the Netherlands and basically i went from incredibly depressed and anxious in the last 2 years from being at college at 16 where I gave 0 fucks about my life and failed half my subjects and got 100% in the other half all of which were Sciences such as Biology, chemistry medicine and etc to a bit anxious and incredibly motivated and got 100% in my results in Mechanical engineering at a different college at 17, but I had to push the teachers because I felt I deserved of good marks (whereas before I didn't) and I would bitch moan, complain, even a teacher ended up getting fired and another got warnings, but I would spend quite literally (even though i know most of you reading this won't believe me) 10 to14 hours a day of non-stop working for 9 months which paid off and i got 2 scholarships and 100% in all of my subjects on that course. Now im at university it feels like ive gone up another level, having to bitch and moan even more if i dont understand something i make sure the teacher tells me even if its in their own time, if i get a bad grade i challenge it and prove its not what they taught or that mine is correct, writing complaint letters finding teachers and staff to question and submit complaints to is pretty much the norm now. And i can tell it's annoying people pissing them off and I think the teachers are scared too. It makes me feel shit too, but it feels necessary if i want to do well, it feels like they are constantly testing me and attacking me by giving me crap grades for the amount of work i do, so i have to attack them back with complaints and questioning their marking, so im not always on the defense. Is this an ego thing? Because to me it always seemed like something that's necessary to get me where i want to be by being motivated and fighting back, but its getting pretty tiring i don't know any other way.

In my opinion It's not about the bad boy being bad thats necessarily attractive to women, its that women can sense that "nice guys" arent acting themselves and come off as inauthentic, and not only do women find that unattractive but also that it gives off the impression that nice guys are too pussy to act themselves which is not so masculine, she can sense your intentions but also finds you too scared to act yourself. The "bad boy" type of guy tends to act himself which comes across as less creepy and is more authentic even if the guy is a dick to girls, but women find it more attractive than a sheepish guy she cant relate to and finds it creepy because nice guys don't open act themselves. By nice guy i mean guys that are just acting nice to the girl in the hope of getting with her, not just doing it to be nice.

Currently i'm near the end of my first semester studying for a Mechatronics BSc and its been satisfactory, despite my current situation which is i got 100% on a Mechanical Engineering diploma and the tutors at the university were debating on whether or not i would be accepted onto do a mechatronics degree amongst others from high schools and i ended up with a conditional offer only just which baffled me but of course i am grateful for, but since studying the subject i noticed a huge gap in my knowledge in half the subjects being taught mainly maths, not because i found it difficult but just that i hadn't been taught it, anyway long story short i failed all my exams first quarter and the guy i worked with on one of my practicals dropped out so i failed my electronics practical too since he didn't tell me for over a month saying he'd come back..., despite this ive continued to work hard morning to midnight even on days i goto university i do about 4 to 6 hours revision, but it had me thinking most people on this course have no idea that we are learning a bunch of useless crap and we are literally being told that we will get paid a lot of money if we knew aspects of maths that are almost never used in engineering. Sure its impressive but in my opinion its more intelligent and better use of my life and time to learn relevant information that i can use and leave the theory that has little practical use to mathematicians . In all honesty i feel like the course is all or nothing for me though for what i want to do since employers seem to be focused on employing those that are college educated and wouldn't even consider me if i was an autodidact for example, in my opinion college education being related to how intelligent someone is and how well they will perform at work in this field n my experience seems so superficial its unreal and only looks good on paper. Im currently 18 which is still kind of young and im only just starting to understand what i want to do and believe im on the right course but i just feel that university for the way in which the subject is taught is useless but i don't know any other alternative that would combine practical and theory with just the relevant parts of the subjects. Could you please give me some advice and opinions on what i should do, i know people will tell me that they cant tell me what i should do but what would you do if this was your situation?

It's a 4-year course, 2 years of theory, a minors qualification and an internship. And i'll try to keep on going with it i currently believe im on the right course in general its just been so frustrating so ao far, its good to here that if i do fail and kicked off the course its not the end for me. I dont see any other alternatives at the moment.

I used to have similar issues, sounds like anxiety to me tbh through going through CBT you realize that your physical actions affect your thoughts, if your breathing patterns are going funny (which happened to me for months) its like heavy breathing when anxious, your body thinks your anxious so you feel anxious and have anxious thoughts and vise versa from thoughts to physical reactions. Think of the negative thoughts like a bully who gives you negative insults, they feed off reactions, by trying to reason with the thoughts or to try and not think of them you feed the problem the best thing you can do is to recognize it without fighting it like "its that annoying thought again" and let it have its say and dont react to it, like bullies they stop tormenting if they cant get a reaction.

In my opinion it is and it isnt, im a freshman studying mechatronics and so far i can only see the Programming, dynamics, statics electronics being useful, but i also have to study a load of other useless crap that serves little purpose such as communications, personal development ( but in this class they teach us stuff we already know), and a load of other useless crap with assignments that come along with it, on top of that theres so much theory which of course its useful to understand how circuits and etc work but i 'll never have to draw a circuit and use mathematics skills to calculate voltage, resistance and etc when there is already software and hardware that reads it for you. The same with maths, there's very little that i 'll use out of the syllabus for maths that they teach. The issue is is that if i did an apprenticeship or worked my way up without a degree i think that companies would pay me less.

I was in the exact same situation as you, now im a freshman at university and will finish my course with about $8500 of debt for a 4 year degree in mechatronics when my alternative option would be finishing uni with over $60,000 debt, how? Leave the country and shop about for cheaper alternatives, who ever said you have study within your country, my situation may be easier as im an EU citizen and rates for me are cheaper in various European nations for that reason, but i know that some nations such as Norway (a non EU nation) offer courses that are taught in English for free and for a small fee per semester offer unlimited free health care, councilling, student discounts, free public facility usage and etc, even to foreigners. (i study in the Netherlands btw) but when you look at Uni/college fees in the US,UK or Australia they are ridiculously pricey compared to most foreign alternatives which are often taught in English too. Or if possible look into the Open university, i believe that may be cheaper too.

Since I've started self-actualization work I've managed to cure and manage a lot of my anxieties and depression through understanding them in a matter of months which were initially were labelled as 'moderate to severe anxiety and depression' and i feel a lot more mature now than i did back then since this self-actualization work. But the one issue I still haven't been able to resolve is being a hypochondriac, I've been able to manage it to a degree but the thoughts of getting sick by highly unlikely causes still come to my mind, the problem I face is that I believe that these thoughts and feelings are necessary to keep myself and others alive and healthy by eliminating all risks, I no longer act upon these thoughts very often compared to how i used to but they still bug me, it 's almost like I'm lacking an understanding of something that cause these thoughts, I've watched leos videos on depression, anxiety and etc but when it comes to physical health risks it seems like being aware of the risks should matter. Another thing i should add is that these thoughts only seem to become an issue and harder to dismiss when i have a lot of caffeine which i consume on a daily basis, which i have been reducing from my diet, the thing is i don't believe that the caffeine is the issue because whether i have caffeine or not i still think about my health and potential health risks that could be present.

You probably already know this but remember, you are your awareness not your thoughts, therefore you have the ability to recognise these negative thoughts without attaching to them whilst still being aware of them, i personally find the worst thing i can do is associate and believe the negative emotion or thought is part of me, instead i just recognise and observe them but dismiss them by realising that they are only a part of me if i let them or want them to be, the awareness can always be focused on other thoughts and emotions.

Are morals learnt or innate behaviors? I'm interested in wondering what the actualized community thinks of this

@JustinS I'm a vegetarian and I'm just wondering, does sun warrior go well with milk in terms of taste like whey does?

I'm an 18 year old male and 182cm tall and have about between 20% to 25% body fat and currently weigh 14st (196lbs or 89kg), I've been lifting heavy weights for about 3 or 4 years now and have gotten as muscular as I have wanted to get and as far as i know I believe I have most likely stopped growing taller, so I've decided I should start to lose weight and eat more healthily so i have turned vegetarian since last December (with the exception of taking creatine), now for the past month I have started reducing my caloric intake from what was around 3000Kcal progressively to the point i now consume about calories 1800Kcal per day and have went from 14.5st (92kg or 203lbs) to 14st (196lbs or 89kg), so i have made some progress in the course of about a month and a half . But seeing that the recommended daily caloric intake for an adult male is about 2500Kcal (which is what has been recommended by the NHS which is the public health service in my country), and considering I'm slightly larger than the average male makes me think i have been doing something incorrectly as I haven't felt as hungry as I expected to feel. So I'm wondering is it necessary to feel hungry when cutting/reducing your caloric intake? Or do i just need to reduce my caloric intake further?

@ChimpBrain Sorry for the late reply, a lot has been going on in my life recently. I have taken on your advice and have added leg day into my routine doing squats, but have also tried with some hypertrophy training doing approximately 6 sets of 10 reps with 30 to 60 second breaks in between at a slightly lower weight than what i did before for each exercise (generally more or less), and have noticed i have got that good soreness feeling that i hadn't had in quite a while so i believe it's working . As well as including whey protein in my diet as well now so i'll see how that goes. Thank you for the advice.

Ok now i understand what you are saying, and i think i know why (or at least have some idea of why i may have been able to get stronger without so much protein and lower volume). Correct me if im wrong about any of this as im here to learn but i think i have come to understand completely what you were saying. I always did about 8 or 10 sets of 5 reps working close to failure on high amounts of weight primarily isolation exercises (which therefore explains lower amounts of weight in some cases, but when i did compound exercises i could shift what was for me a lot of weight like over 60kg for example). As i was doing low numbers reps at what's for me at least heavy weights, it was more to do with strength training than growing muscle as this video explains: This explains why i got stronger on a protein deficit as strength training seems to have a lot to do with adaptation of the CNS along with some muscle growth opposed to focusing on growing muscle which appears to focus on slightly less weight to allow for greater sets of reps and therefore overall number of reps possibly boosting volume during workouts, therefore i never required so much protein compared to everyone else training to build muscle to get stronger over the 3 or 4 year period i had been lifting to get stronger. http://www.musclehack.com/want-to-build-muscle-how-many-reps-per-set-for-hypertrophy/ Therefore for me to increase muscle hypertrophy i volume, i think i need to reduce the weight that i lift slightly to be able to do greater sets of reps and more reps in general to increase the volume of my exercise, along with increasing my protein intake which is key for building more muscle and maintaining it whilst I lose weight. My brother actually recently got a power rack so i can now do squats and i have a cable machine with one cable so i can do lat pull downs and bar bell rows, so i now no longer have to skip leg day and now exercise my back And i have: I have 2 bench presses 1 pec fly bench 2 benches 1 preacher curl 2E-Z curl bars, 2 barbells , 8 dumbells. 1 power rack 1 cable machine with 1 cable and now have a squat rack

@David1 I've thought about doing a keto diet but i've heard many people say that they feel weak from the lack of glycogen (provided by sugars and carbs) to work out. But im getting protein supplements that are vegan even such as hemp protein powder, and have seen vegans such as vegan gains and jon venus who are quite big and lean body builders so i assume its possible so maintain and build muscle when vegetarian.

@ChimpBrain I understand, im just glad that im getting any sort of help, and i will look up some HIIT excersises. I did used to barbell rows but i found that it never really worked out for me no matter how many times i revisited the technique, i 've looked into doing dead lifts and the fact that it could potentially mess your spine up your spine unless you get the technique spot on, combined with the fact i have hypermobility, means that i shall not be doing it so i can walk up straight when im older. Although i want to start doing more wide grip pull ups but im too heavy to do them lol, but i do manage about 20 reps on mondays. But in terms of leg exercises cardio running or cycling won't build so many fast twitch muscle fibers as with resistance training, so i never bothered too much. Also im skeptical to add more volume as every fitness instructor ive spoken to even Arnold Schwarzenegger himself has said that progressive overload is best required for building fast twitch muscle fibers, and therefore lower volume and greater weight exercising close to failure, and vise versa for endurance training and building slow-twitch muscle fibers, but i will look into it, although i have found that body building.com has stated: "2 - Increase Sets Increase the number of sets you perform for a given exercise. Instead of 2 or 3 sets maybe you'll want to increase to 3 or 4 in order to really fatigue the muscle(s)." http://www.bodybuilding.com/fun/goulet11.htm And i did build muscle without that much protein as i never supplemented with protein supplements and have 17 inch arms (which at least i personally consider to be pretty large for a natty) and i probably rarely had more than 50 grams of protein since i started lifting, but I've ordered hemp protein powder. Im not saying that you are wrong im just simply stating my reasons for why im skeptical in certain areas, and i do really appreciate all the help you are providing me with and i am now looking to build HIIT into my routine.

@Tim Green So far im not so sure, i dont eat large amounts of fruit and veg, only salads in quorn bacon sandwiches and the vegetables in stir frys, i have a feeling that it has something to do with the large quantity of water i drink, although im not sure if its possible to not feel hungry off of water and considering how much of a caloric deficit im putting myself through.

@ChimpBrain I actually haven't done any cardio in a year, which of course is a habit i may have to start although I believed that any form of caloric deficit would cause weight loss. Although i do strength training 4-5 days a week. I have never taken protein supplements and have only just purchased hemp protein powder as through research i have also recognised supplementing with protein sources is ideal during a caloric deficit. I have also found out that i sometimes consume fewer calories than what i firstly calculated, ( specifically 1566.9kcal), I don't have a varied diet and usually eat the same food sources throughout the week, although when i do have some different foods my caloric intake may sometimes be at 2000kcal at the most, but a typical daily diet for me (for at least 4 days a week) consists of: A ginsters cheese and onions slice for breakfast which has 495kcal, 33.8g of fat, 2.5g of sugars and 10.4g of protein, 35.3g of carbs Then when i get home i usually have a tescos mushroom stir fry with black bean sauce (for enough energy to exercise) consisting of 959kcal, 20.2g of fat, 28.2g of sugars, 16.7g of protein, 38.2g of carbs And i often have a red bull during half the days of the week which is 112kcal, 0g of fat, 11g of sugars, 0g of protein, 11g of carbs Which in total a typical daily caloric intake and protein,carbs,etc adds up to 1566.9kcal, 54g of fat, 84.5g of carbs, 41g of sugars, 27,1grams of protein. I often have Quorn bacon sandwiches for breakfast instead of a cheese and onion slice (8 Quorn slices with 2 white bread rolls) for breakfast for the other half of the week which consist of a total combined of: 599kcal, 25.4g of fat, couldnt find results for sugar content, 28.3g of protein, 59.85g of carbs. Which when switched with the cheese and onion slice: 1670kcal My exercise routine consists of : Monday: 40 reps of 25kg dumbell rotations Tuesday: 40 reps of 37.5kg tricep push downs Wednesday: Rest day Thursday: 50 reps of 30kg ab pull downs Friday: 40 reps of chest dips Saturday: 30 reps of 15kg dumbell front raises and 30 reps lateral with same weight Sunday: Rest day As you may have noticed i have no leg day as I don't have the equipment to currently do it as i do all of this at home. Im just wondering if my diet and exercise routine requires changes to aid in my weight loss as so far i dont feel very hungry although i dont feel full (if that makes sense), and is it dangerous that my caloric intake is pretty low ? The sources of nutritional information i used: http://www.britishcornershop.co.uk/ginsters-cheese-and-onion-slice-deep-fill http://www.tesco.com/groceries/product/details/?id=290981391 http://www.tesco.com/groceries/product/details/?id=290981667 http://www.tesco.com/groceries/product/details/?id=290819723 http://energydrink-uk.redbull.com/red-bull-calories http://www.quorn.co.uk/food/cook-from-scratch/bacon-style-slices/ http://www.weightlossresources.co.uk/calories/calorie_counter/bread_bakery.htm

As part of improving myself as a person I've went from having moderate/severe social anxiety, generalised anxiety and depression, where i was very introverted, to becoming more confident and outgoing in a period of about a year now. I've noticed that since I've turned from becoming very introverted to extrovert I've become ruder, saying really dark and nasty things most people wouldn't say and i do this subconsciously, to the point that i do it to friends when having banter. I feel this has something to do with my college learning environment combined with Brittish cultural conditioning (if that makes sense) to some degree, and as my classes are very male dominated in fact there are no women in any of my classes and the students and teachers are having a lot of banter and so it seems necessary that i have to adapt to the situation by doing the same, and I've got pretty good at it but to those outside of college I believe I appear more arrogant and rude, and that it has caused my ego to excel in certain aspects at least. On the one hand (this could be the ego talking but) I feel this adaptation is necessary to get through college, but on the other it's become hard to suppress outside of college and i just do it subconsciously and I'm concerned that when I move to another country like the Netherlands for university this year, i'll come across as being really rude and arrogant. I just don't know how to fix this issue, because i feel I'm becoming something i don't really want to become but the adaptation feels necessary to be socially excepted and to not get picked on at college at the moment. Is it possible to get a good balance between the two?

@Ajax Oh yeah I hadn't watched it until you mentioned it but that does make sense from what leo has said now that I have watched the video, thanks for the advice

@JevinR Hemp Protein powder, it's pretty good stuff too, its a lot cheaper than whey but honestly it tastes awful in my opinion, i tried making it into tea and etc but it tastes disgusting but nevertheless it's cheap and vegan. =)

@cly "Shouldn't we be able to conciousnessly tap our emotions to serve ourselves at a time when we choose?" As we are an intelligent species we will be able to consciously tap our emotions to serve ourselves as we become more intelligent as a species more easily . The reason for this is because intelligence is defined as the ability to adapt and not just defined as the ability to know more and learn faster or more advanced information, therefore humans will evolve to adapt to (potentially) control and use emotions more effectively provided we become more intelligent as we evolve as a species and require emotions to survive as a species, and even if we don't require emotions to survive as a species in the future but we still have them anyway humans will have adapted to use them more efficiently as they become more intelligent, as adaptation goes hand in hand with intelligence.

It's very unlikely, although I've heard of a few people having growth spurts in their early twenties before though (like at 21/22 at the latest). Leo did a great video that may solve what "you" currently believe is an issue

Just lift heavy weights using the rule of Progressive overload with the correct technique and you will make gains ;), and preferably consume enough calories, you don't need any protein supplements (personally I believe its a con), although creatine is performance enhancing (it also temporarily adds an extra 1/2 inch to your muscles due to water retention) which has helped me a lot, I've only had 1 tub of whey once when i was 15, never had it since and I'm 18 and I've made all kinds of gains

The unconscious, as according to my Psychology teacher the subconscious doesn't exist, therefore only the conscious and unconscious states do (as far as I'm aware, excuse the pun ;-) ).