Chives99

instead up of picking upping why dont you just engage in some fun hobbies and interests and shoot the breeze with women there if your autistic and have a special interest find a woman who likes your interest then you can chew her ear off about it lol, if you try to date neurotypical women well thats just like trying to put a square peg into a round hole , no wonder you cant connect lol.

@Twentyfirst what is underground market lol

I don’t even know where to begin looking for a woman who genuinely wants a soul-level connection. I have zero interest in playing society’s dating games — I crave something raw, emotionally authentic, and real. Maybe I’m looking in the wrong places... perhaps I need to start meeting women at personal development workshops, trauma groups, or philosophy clubs — places where depth is the baseline, not the exception. Definitely a different vibe from the surface-level socializing you get in most environments.

@Yimpa And that’s it. The love. The pain. The obsession. The desperation. The loneliness. All of it dissolves into something greater — and you realize: You were never missing anything. You were just chasing a reflection of the divine intimacy that already lives inside you.

your whole relationship is fake then, how can you be happy with that , i kinda get why some cultures do the whole arrange marriage thing cut out the manipulation and tomfoolerly

This is why I like being autistic. Everyone else just seems to be gaming each other—playing roles, performing, keeping everything on the surface with no real depth or authenticity. Being emotionally deep and authentic is lonely, because most people don’t communicate on that level. But I’d rather be real than sell myself out for shallow, surface-level relationships. I see it all the time—couples staying together just because they don’t want to be lonely, not because they truly connect. There’s no emotional intimacy, just a performance. And I’ve noticed in the news how some teachers end up throwing their lives away for a relationship with a student. It’s incredibly stupid, sure—but part of me thinks it comes from being emotionally starved. Society tells us to bottle everything up, to keep up appearances, and they just snap. They always seem to go for the misfits, the emotionally open ones—often autistic teens—not the typical "chads." I bet those kids were sweet and real with them in a way most people aren't. I get why it’s called “game,” this whole dating culture, but maybe I don’t want game. I want to be real. And that scares people—being vulnerable, putting your heart on the line, letting yourself be seen. But to me, that’s the only way connection actually means something.

We've discussed on here many time that online dating is shitshow with a winner takes all environment where everyone looking with the abundance of beautiful people on these apps are all chasing after the top 20 percent and ignoring 80 percent of the other profiles, it creates the illusion that any guy could date a super model and any woman could date a rockstar you just have to swipe enough ........... friendship apps are great for building social circle and theres no pressure to score or impress the person etc so you can just relax and chat and they could invite you to a social gathering , party or whatever and introduce you to more people . I've got plenty of friends that were friends with their now partner for years before they went on a date, so completely ignore the advice you have to rush into romance you can very well be with someone on friendly basis and things change, but dont have that expectation though just enjoy socialising. to me its the lack of pressure why these apps are more preferable , desperation is the biggest turn off ever, so theres no needing to get anywhere

this post is for anyone who feels inadequate because they're a virgin or not having sex or getting female attention. Just recognise that you are already whole and complete, you are perfect exactly as you, even if you die a virgin, you can change how perfect you are, even if you sleep with 1000 women you are no more perfect then when u started. Just feel the love inside of yourself, think of time you were with a friend you had a deep connection with maybe you were on holiday or at a nightclub together, think of good times with coworkers laughing and joking and being together. think of nice times you had with your family. Did you need to prove yourself to them then? no, you are perfect. when you feel this love inside of yourself it does al the leg work for attracting women, even if you make a social mistake you'd brush it off and laugh and she'll probably forgive, you wont believe our lovely women , they have so much empathy, when you feel this love inside of yourself you will be lightyears ahead of the cocky asshole chads, with the emotional took kit of a donkey, just because you can stand up straight and say a load of lines in a nightcluv doesnt mean they are good partners, this self love you feel is going to be answer to learning how to attract and sustain a relationship , i mean sure you can take pointers from people but its self love which you need to trust uttermost as these pointers there just guildlines you have to rust your own innate judgement system if you dont all you've be left with is anxiety in you head, completely unable to do anything or make any kind decision when talking to someone

give up on yourself, thats the counter-intuitive thing. In doing so it might bring about the fear of uncertainty, of How will I survive? how will i get what I want? how will i find peace and happiness? With surrender comes freedom from the inner turmoil of the mind and an allowing of openness to let things naturally play out. Trying to control everything only antagonises it

Shallow , trivial form of happiness

even if you get what you think you want through ego you cant even enjoy it anyway as there is the fear of loss and fear of insecurity and unworthiness. With surrender everything is allowed which creates an openness for things to be authentically be brought into your life

thats because we become conditioned to fit the mould which stifles our individuality

the abrahamic seem very dualistic , any kind of worship fuels seperation

@Consept In zen there is a concept calling 'standing in your own way' self sabotage basically where you cut yourself from what you want by pretending that you are seperate from it and need to acquire something to be worthy of it. The irony is this mechanism is what fuels seperation in of itself

its a mental health crisis , mental health support , connections and opportunities to socialise and be part of something is certainly missing . We are a social species , how ironic now that we all live in cities and can connect with each other with a touch of a button ,yet are more isolated than ever. Ignoring incels wont make them go away, I suppose this post is guidance for incels that are not at the point of needing psychiatric treatment. I go to neurodiverse meetups easy to talk to people there than regular drinking ones, other than that go to socials which are relevant your passions like if your into coding , you'd go to a tech meetup or if you like wrestling they'd be something for that etc

i dont blame people for living with their parents in this economy , I know plenty of people that live with their parents and have a partner so thats definately not going to to stop you from finding someone , its your personality or you not looking for someone you are compatible with

nothing more attractive than someone that loves themselves , you're putting the cart before the horse , before anyone should start with learning social skills and attraction etc they need to built the foundation with self love, self love is bedrock no amount of any skill or knowledge is any use without self love and when you learn to love yourself all this learning how to attract someone just becomes second nature , relying on intuition rather than intellect. Nothing can hurt your chances with someone more than self loathing and negativity, with self love you stop being so self centered and just focus on giving to the other person which is worth the world more than any gimmick or trick that you use to manipulate someone into bed which is inauthentic anyway , women can smell inauthenticity from a mile a away it just reeks of desperation as you NEED the person to be complete. Just start seeing yourself as being whole and complete already unconditionally , the alternative is to hate yourself which will mean you can never love another person, maintain your self loathing go ahead see how it works out for you, but you could one day to drop all the rules for self love. Please tell me how hating yourself will get you anywhere.?????????

learn to love yourself and find happiness outside of women and they will flock to you , are you on the autism spectrum? because i know what it feels like to be worthless and unloveable as you can get a lot of bully and negativity from society who quite frankly don understand autism, and some people are just dam right assholes, you dont want them in your life, you want people that love and support you for you. Just love youself, let go of needing wowmen to be happy and they will flock. When you dont need anything from them your authentic personality shines. so always remmember to love yourself its the answer to eveything

Why create pain and misery and suffering? If God is all loving and loves itself, Why create problems that lead to people seeing the world as not as perfect, Is it to embrace oneself in a unlimited way even if one is suffering? why does god want to experiences these states? Surely a god that wants to create perfect reality woldn't have suffering and misery in it?

new this would be on the forum, only difference is that it will take cash flow from criminals i say thats a good thing

its essentially synthetic mushrooms, they are very powerful I had a couple and reality was reduced nothingness

@Emotionalmosquito I dont think you realise how difficult it is for women to prove rape, many dont bother because they dont want their lives dragged before the court and to be interrogated by the police to see if they're lying. A woman has been locked up in the uk for eight and a half years for lying about rape and being held in sex trafficking ring framing several innocent men, she even went as far as to hit herself in the face with a hammer to fake injuries ( who the fuck does that , thats gonna bloody hurt) its cases like that which make it so hard to be believed for a woman . One woman lured multiple men into pub toilets then try get attention by saying it was rape, but the police can psychologically identifiy lies and the cctv showed her laughing after the encounter so you wouldn't be laughing if you had just been raped, another case where someone seeking attention and trying to ruin mens lives has made it so difficult for real victims to be believed

no i appreciate hair that is lushes and well maintained

i have a hair kink so suppose plenty of people would think im weird i can litterally get off touching some beautiful soft long hair

they dont hold any relevance for modern day democracy , its just pageantry and tradition