mr_engineer

If I look at her as critically as I can, what comes to mind is that she's an ideologue. That's it. I don't see what's dangerous about that. You are free to follow her or not. And, about the fear of regressing to Stage Blue - keep in mind that Stage Blue is a foundation on which the other stages come. After religion loses its hold on society, there has to come a new ideology that tells parents how to be good parents, right?! And that basically teaches young people the best way to find their way to a secure relationship. You are free to debate the level of counter-productivity of the hook-up culture on this front.

Yeah, I've lived in the US for a couple of years. I totally understand. If I'd lived in New York City or something, I would not have been happy with the situation, by any means. But, I lived in one of the most progressive, spiritually endowed cities of the US. One of the most Stage Green cities. And, it was amazing, to say the least. I learned that there is a lot more to relationships than what meets the eye. I was able to break out of materialism in the context of relationship, where it's all about cool clothes and sunglasses and hairstyles and stuff. (If you're working on that stuff to look cool, you're ahead of the curve in a Stage Blue culture. So, by doing that, I was already pushing past the center of gravity here.) And, I was able to construct a vision for my relationship-life in which there is true love. It's not about material compromise (Stage Blue) or just getting laid (Stage Orange). The important thing is to get knowledge about relationships that's outside the traditional structure. And to meet people who have actual relationship-wisdom. I, personally, value that very highly. Which is why I would rather move to a country whose center of gravity is at Orange and which has certain Stage Green, New-Age hippie pockets. Now, there are Stage Green people here too. So, I'm not being racist here and saying that these cultures have no hope at all. There is hope, there is a trajectory forward for them. The thing is that the Stage Green people are very few and far between. There are some SJWs here reacting to toxic Orange behavior, or abuses of power by big CEOs. But, they're very few. I can count them on one hand. And, they're being drowned out by the materialistic horde. They have no impact to speak of, no offense to them.

In the past couple of years, India is officially stepping foot in the door of Stage Orange. The hook-up culture is being declared to be normalized, by the movies that are getting released. (Movies dictate culture here) And, do you know what the overwhelming message is?! 'Love is an illusion'. 'Love doesn't exist'. 'Love is what you define it to be'. The materialism of this culture is not going away any time soon. People are not becoming self-aware, conscious of their real motivations behind entering and keeping relationships any time soon. Most youngsters are running away from commitment entirely, because on the other side, is a traditional structure of marriage that they have no knowledge outside of. The culture is becoming more and more decadent, in a nutshell. It's going to get much worse before it'll get better. I'm not looking forward to the debasement of the culture, as it enters Stage Orange, if I'm honest. I'm not a big fan of the culture at Stage Blue either, but the pendulum-swing is also not coming from a very conscious place.

@Jacob Morres Where do you live? What do you know about how bad it is? I'm quoting people who have any knowledge about what it takes to make a long-term relationship work here. Not the morons who are in clubs and kissing random girls.

And these are not safe countries for women. If you do commit to a woman here, protecting her is its own headache. It's way simpler to just leave and date elsewhere.

And what incentive do they have to tell me the truth? The competition here is ruthless, because there is a severe shortage of people who are open-minded to dating. Cuz arranged-marriage is the norm. I have zero trust in people who are high Blue, low Orange here. They lie through their fucking teeth, they're scammers who will do anything for immediate profit.

@Jacob Morres Even the Taliban uses Twitter. This doesn't mean that they're highly developed people, right?! Similarly, just cuz you have nightclubs in some part of the country, doesn't mean that the people there are more developed. I mean, fine, it's possible, in theory. It's just not advisable in practice. Or rather, do it at your own risk. If something goes terribly wrong, you were warned.

Now, I'm going to tell you why I personally am in favor of leaving a Stage Blue country. Women here can be broadly classified into two categories. The first one is the traditionally minded woman. She will dress modestly, she will embody the cultural archetype of femininity. She will be your stereotypical 'good girl'. She will be sexually repressed. And, she will either be totally closed off to dating, wanting an arranged-marriage, or she will test the hell out of whoever approaches her for a date. You have to have a lot of patience to win her over. Also, her family/community probably has so much control over her life that she probably just won't be able to have a dating-life, unless you're very rich. The second one is the 'modern woman'. These women tend to be on the hotter side. The catch with them is that they are very feminist. Aka, they despise men. Making something work with them will be a pain in the ass, at the very least. They will be very controlling and the relationships with them will be loose. Now, if you are not emotionally investing in the relationships, things could work with them. These are the guys who tend to get them, the 'nice guys' who want a loving relationship lose out with them. You have to be a cold and heartless bastard to get them. The thing is that if you date a bunch of these women, you will go through a lot of heartbreak. There will be severe highs and lows in your dating-life as a result of this. Because commitment with a feminist woman will not be very strong. Cuz 'equality'! And 'independence'. Now, I have more sympathy for the feminist women here. Because there are very real women's rights issues here. When a white woman talks about the patriarchy, it sounds like 'first-world problems' compared to when a woman here talks about the patriarchy. The whole thing about 'manspreading, mansplaining' is laughable (TW for the snowflakes) compared to the actual issues of women here not being allowed to go to school or work because their family/community is very regressive and religious. And dowry, of course. The pay-gaps are also pretty bad. Now, why am I not very hopeful here?! Because neither of these categories of women actually knows themselves and what they want. Neither of them are thinking about compatibility. There isn't a lot of relationship-wisdom here. This poses a serious issue for the long-term sex-life of the relationship, to put it tangibly. This is Stage Blue life. It's a pre-individualistic society. This is why I'm looking to leave this place, specifically to have a better romantic life.

Don't cold-approach on a routine basis in a Blue country. What Leo says about 'night-game' and 'day-game' literally doesn't apply in a Blue country. Even in the best-case scenario, if there are no toxic regressive elements holding you back, someone will ask you 'What are you doing, spending thousands of hours chasing vagina?! Don't you have something more productive or constructive to do with your time?!' You will get a bad reputation, not because you want to get laid, but because it's seen as something decadent and frivolous. Survival is just harder in these countries, so it'll be expected that you have better things to do with your time than to do pick-up. If you come across someone cute who you have the opportunity to talk to, take it. But, that would be a lucky accident anyways. It's not too reliable. (Don't be surprised if someone gives you a hooker's number, lol. Some pimp will approach you and say 'Here's my girl's number, these will be the charges'.) Now, what do you do about social-skills? In a Stage Blue country, privacy and individual identity aren't that much of a thing. So, you shouldn't struggle that much to talk to people in and of itself. Now, learning to treat people with respect is its own thing that you won't learn in a Stage Blue country. This is why you leave and go elsewhere, to a more developed country. Stage Blue relationships are not about mutual happiness. Rather, they are about compromise and maintaining a social image. You have to play the image-game even if you don't personally care what other people think of you. The reason is that people, in general, aren't very respectful to each other. So, if they think you're 'weird', they will get into conflicts with you. Very serious, problematic conflicts. Like landlords not giving you an apartment for rent cuz you're young and single. Which is why, originally, I said that if you want a happy relationship, you leave.

@Jacob Morres No, it's not doable here. It's very dangerous, there is a mob-mentality relative to any guy speaking to a girl. It's seen as harassment. If someone notices any 'weird behavior', you're getting reported and you're being put on a watch-list. There is a lot of backwardness here even relative to single young people in general. Single young people have a hard time renting a place, because of the house-parties. Landlords have a problem with the noise it makes, so some just don't do it. I'm just being real about the reality of these countries. Relationships are not about 'love' and 'intimacy' in these countries. They are about who can put food on the table and who can cook and clean. There is a reason arranged-marriage is still the norm in these countries.

Then it depends on how much you love your culture. If you love it, date there. If not, leave. And, keep in mind that there will be cultural shadows that you'll have to answer to either way. Things will get tricky at some point if you want something long-term. Be sure that you like your culture for the right reasons. If you do, if you know your culture well enough to make up your mind, you will have solutions to the problems it'll pose to you. But, if you're like me and you're like 'fuck this shit', leave!

Arranged-marriage is the norm in Stage Blue countries. Depending on how developed the country is, you will either have to conform to it or you will have the option to battle the system itself. The battle for sexual-autonomy will be hard won either way. And pick-up is safe only after you have sexual autonomy. So, a hell no for pick-up in a Stage Blue country. Maybe go through social circle and date like that. You will be more shielded from the bullshit of the society. But, the danger here is that you may not have access to the hotter women. And you will be psychologically held back by the unconsciousness of your circle. So, there are trade-offs. I personally prefer just leaving the country and being free to date.

I live in a Stage Blue country. And, it's pretty normal here for pick-up to be equated to sexual-harassment, because the community wants to 'defend their women'. There is no such thing as 'sexual autonomy' here. Female virginity is valued very highly, so if you, as a guy, besmirch the purity of their young women, the community will come for you. When you sleep with someone, it is assumed that you intend to commit to them. And, when you don't, the community will see it as 'rape', because you broke a 'promise to commit' that you didn't make, but they assumed that you made. And, consent is supposed to be given under the condition of future commitment. If the promise of commitment is not kept, the consent is revoked in the future. Bottom-line - Stage Blue countries are insane. Pick-up and casual sex are too risky in these countries.

The question is - will the Stage Blue society allow you to date in peace? Or, will the religious authorities get in your way and use brute-force to stop you from dating a woman of their community? Don't take things like personal sovereignty when it comes to relationship-decisions for granted. This stuff doesn't really exist in Blue countries. There is lots of pressure from parents to get an arranged-marriage. They tend to only want to marry within their community, with people they know. Trust is built through familiarity, there is a huge level of sensitivity against 'outsiders'. Tribalism is huge in such countries.

Every gap, fundamentally, exists because of a bunch of limiting-beliefs that the market holds relative to the unmet need that defines that gap. So, what the entrepreneur has to do, is to first figure out a way to meet that need by creating a product and getting a product-market fit. Then, the next step is for the entrepreneur to understand their market's limiting-beliefs relative to their need. Then, when it's time to market, the entrepreneur/marketer should hit at their limiting-beliefs and show them a new way to meet that need. And pitch their product as the solution! It is the most perceptive people of your market who will understand what you're saying to them. You want your values to align with their values in order to get long-term success in your marketing-venture. This will make or break your future in that niche. It will definitely make or break your ability to create a market-disruption in your favor!

If you follow your gut, everything is going to be okay. Basically, your gut is going to lead you to your Life-Purpose. I'd suggest you drop the money-question and focus entirely on finding your Life-Purpose. That will show you the gift that you have to offer to the world. Then, you will get much better ideas as to how to encash your gift. And, you will have the willpower, the inspiration and the creativity to pull through the obstacles in actualizing these ideas. Following your gut is the single best thing you can do for your creativity. You will bypass all creative blocks on this route. In fact, I'd suggest that you focus on creating whatever aligns with your creative-capacities. And pick a craft to master. And build a vision relative to that. To answer your question, this is the alternative to selling your soul for money.

I use the word 'abuse' in a more traditional sense, like it includes flogging or choking, etc. It's not disrespectful if done consensually.

No, it's not a good idea. If you want a happy relationship, just get out of a Blue country.

The sexual animal in you is not respectful towards women. That's what I'm gathering from this. I'd suggest that you just keep learning more and more about relationships and intimacy and what makes relationships work. Especially compatibility. This will give you more of an idea as to what kind of woman you should be going for and how you would practically make it work. If you are able to figure out more civilized ways of making it work, you will let go of your rape-fantasies. I will draw a distinction between just domination/control-fantasies vs rape-fantasies. The former can be respectful, the latter will not be. Even though both can be consensual. And, it's fine to engage in a consensual rape-fantasy, nothing morally wrong with it. However, a rape-fantasy is probably not going to fly in the context of relationship with someone who you truly love. Your own conscience will not want to be disrespectful towards her. (Abuse/infliction of pain can be consensual, disrespect can't be.) There are people who engage in all kinds of fantasies. However, some fantasies will take you in the direction of unconsciousness and that will get in your way in making serious relationships work. Rape-fantasies fall into that category. So, I'd advise you be careful with those.

Ignorance is bliss.

This kind of person was 'normal' before COVID came up. And, this kind of person evolves (ironically) through the pandemic, not believing the official narrative. About the 'evolution not existing' part - I think that's a word-game. Just figure out what word she uses to explain people changing/living beings changing as an adaptation to their environment. I think you can change her mind about the evolution-thing. And, saying casually racist/homophobic/transphobic stuff was relatively normal before such people started getting cancelled. And, before the mainstream started getting forced to be politically correct. It's still normal outside first-world countries. I think that you should focus on the positives and not the negatives. If she understands masculinity and femininity and if she loves you, you can talk this shit out and come to an agreement sooner or later.

@Hardkill That is a very good question to ponder. Especially if you've been listening to CNN about the war. It's literally the glitch in the matrix of the mainstream media narrative about the war. It's not just Putin's war. He has an entire cabinet of very smart people who are with him, not opposing him. The jobs of all of these people is to be honest with Putin with their expert-opinions of what the consequences could be. Yet, they're all on board. Why is that?! How can that be, if this is just Putin wanting to colonize Ukraine?!

The 'conspiracy-theory' term was also coined by the CIA to demonize and silence anyone who questions their supreme authority. What I'm saying, is, that it's very interesting how the media demonizes 'racism' when it benefits them and when it doesn't benefit them, they start acting in racist ways! It's 'racism' to say that the Taliban are a bunch of terrorist barbarians (which they are) but someone sticks out their tongue the wrong way, the way it's done in their culture, everyone loses their shit. That's real racism!

@Blackhawk Never ever forget that capitalism benefits a lot from materialistic atheism to reign supreme. When people look to material pleasure for happiness, the people selling the coping-mechanisms do very well. Which is why the media will always have incentives to demonize religion and spiritual leaders. It's just that sometimes, you get the opportunity to see how they fabricate stuff. It's truly remarkable, the levels of deception they'll go to.

My only point is that when the mainstream media finds a reason to demonize a spiritual leader, that's very suspicious. It's becoming ever more obvious how they fabricate narratives to demonize whoever their bosses want them to demonize.