friendly-truth

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  1. The post about pickup is corruption: I've heard of pickup from Leo, back in the day..."How to get a girlfriend video".. It's been probably more tha n6-7 years since I watched that. I've watched a TON of videos about pick up, dating, relationship, emotions, communications and all the like. I must admit, it wasn't as helpful as going to therapy. I've recently started meeting a therapist and man, did he change my mind about this whole pick up thing, and it kind of unstuck my mind from thinking in this way most pick up content is teaching.. Today I shared with him, how I was sitting in a coffeeshop and writing, while I saw a pretty girl, and I told him I've set to fantasize about how I could approach her and get her to like me, etc. And he questioned that. Was it my dream for me to get and work hard through discomfort? I realized that I actually, in my fantasy I'm not working hard or struggling. She shows me signs that she wants me, smiles, looks at me and from there I go on and initiate conversation. It's kind of screwed up to think In the realm of unlimited options, my fantasy land, I'm still trying to trick the girl, or to pass her tests, or get he to like me when initially she doesn't. And I realized that my mind is in this model of her being the one that I'm supposed to convinced, when a part of me really wants the girl to show me interest and for me to respond to her. I told him but that's not how women work, they are passive and i'm supposed to take this role. Realized that there are these two conflicting sides - where one is fantasizing about a girl showing her interest, and another that's thinking it's a girl that's not passive so she's not the one. Where actually, the girlfriends I've had were the ones that approached me! While I'm unable to overcome this social anxiety approach anxiety sutff - FOR FUCKING YEARS - i'm actually dreaming of the girl chasing me. WOW, and this whole mental torture of approach, and game...