Toby

Get clear what you want from her first. Then ask for it.

Ejaculation and orgasm are two different things. I'm not really into this energy / sex thing, but books I liked were: - Osho: Sex Matters - Osho: Love, Freedom and Aloneness - Krishnananda Trobe, Amana Trobe: When Sex Becomes Intimate I also like David Deida's work very and some of Barry Longs'.

You could also do a more tantric approach, do whatever you desire and enjoy and be present with it as much as possible.

You know the story of Buddha?

Marketing: "get it while you can". But the truth is, that it is legal in many countries, e.g. where I live, and that might last maybe 1-2 more years. And this could contribute in decreasing availability.

I guess everyone is already living their purpose.

Ok. Then I cannot recommend you anyone (I only know some "coaches" that focus more on "spirituality", "body work" or "energy work").

Can you please write what exactly are the issues that you need the life coach for?

After having a first glimpse beyond ego.

Oh, I saw that also the "Parimal" is relatively near you. They might offer good things as well. If I lived near there I would check out the retreats of Muni and Samarpan for sure. I would even say that you would be stupid not to check out Muni from 08.03. - 12.03. (if you can afford it: http://www.muni-satsang.de/pag/retreat_vor_frueling17.htm), he is an amazing teacher, enlightened beyond anything you could imagine.

No, I don't have any experience with them but they do good work as far as I've heard. If I would live nearby I would certainly go there from time to time and check it out for myself. I cannot really tell if it is really great or a bit dogmatic without having been there. For overall balance it could be very beneficial. For waking up - I don't know, maybe Advaita or Zen are more efficient (even if they also do courses on Advaita / Jnani Yoga there). Some things they offer it would be clear that I would go there. Maybe a weekend here and there or more. I also would check out mantra singing / concerts with Janin Devi. Maybe you could even live there or attend some courses cheaply or for free, if you work there. I guess there is a teacher that worked and lived in a center of theirs for years (Narada: http://vedanta-yoga.de/narada/), maybe you could tell him your situation and ask if and what in that center could be beneficial for you.

You have germany's most famous yoga-center close to you (Bad-Meinberg). Couldn't you do anything there that would be valuable to your path?

This is normal to some degree. With time it relaxes. You could also focus on something else if that works better. Also you could experiment with eyes open and closed if that relaxes it a bit.

Overly simplified from my limited understanding: mindfulness: being present with what is consciousness: the presence that you can feel. Can arise, can go. There are usually three states of consciousness: waking, sleep with dreams and dreamless sleep. Awareness: that in which and as which consciousness arises. Everpresent, even when consciousness is absent.

So what book or maybe teaching speaks most to you, what books did you like? (as a reference)

The problem is that you cannot go to someone with the agenda to be different than they are and then expect them to be open and receptive to what you have to say. You can only speak from total acceptance how she is at the given moment. Otherwise, if you go into blaming, judging and shaming it might even contribute to the problem. And remember, it's not just a psychological addiction - there is also a physical component to it. I mean, I heard of a case that two heroin addicts dropped the addiction instantly after accidently visiting a satsang, so anything is possible but you could look at your own addictions first to develop compassion how hard it maybe is to break a habit.

Question: where do you live? Is there maybe a spiritual teacher or meditation group that could bring you a different perspective? I mean, I don't see any problems in your situation and it is very easy: if you don't like living with your parents, move out. If you don't like your city, move to another city, if you don't like studying psychology change it. But be careful if you really want something else or just not satisfied with what you have. I mean, no situation is ideal and perfect. But if you can change something, then just do it. No need to travel to get this insight.

It's possible but how exactly should the structure (how many periods of meditation) be? How do you get food for that 40 days?

@Peace and Love Of course labels can become an identity or hold someone back or limit someone but they are also pointers what certain symptoms are. For example if someone with aspergers cannot read emotions or facial expressions (while other people can without any effort or thinking about it), it is something that actually can be tested and impedes functioning socially. Of course someone can improve on that to a certain degree, but basically it is a handicap compared to so called neurotypical people that cannot be overcome even if there are also a lot of positives in that condition. The same is with learning disorders: it is impossible to somehow teach a child math that is labeled having "dyscalculia". Improvements are possible but overcoming it is not possible. It's different when there is ADD or ADHD that causes some learning problems. And it is also different when someone is wrongly labeled a certain condition or has only minor disabilities.

@JKG PM.

@Falk That sounds like the "best of" of pickup community platitudes. ---- Other than that, there is nothing weird about asking a girl where you went wrong if you have Asperger / Autism. That is something which is an expression of the condition. (I guess someone mentioned that @electroBeam has this condition).

Can someone here compare Al-lad with the regular LSD or 1P-LSD? I am actually tempted to try it, even if somehow I expect nothing spectacular and a rather boring experience. But at least it is still legal here and easy to get.

Just one thing about money: Gangaji / Eli are quite expensive, Isaac is average. And the good thing is he just has recommendations for donation, like 15€ on one session and 50€ the whole day (he does one session on Mo-Fr and 3 sessions each on Sa/Su) and you can give as much as you like, nobody controls anything. You could even attend for free if you have nothing.

I only told you the stuff that is in english. There are much much more that is also in german in that area (Karlsruhe / Baden Baden).

- Zen temple "Kosan Ryumon Ji" - Isaac Shapiro in Freiburg - maybe 1on1 session per skype with teachers - Gangaji / Eli in Baden Baden and Heidelberg