Truth

Does that mean no video on Sunday?

Haha hell yeah! That's one of my favorite stand ups, I love the ending to it, people project a lot of their own issues/assumptions onto you and that is seriously relatable here on the forum lol.

I don't know about polygamy, but polyamory is probably more what you're looking for. By being polyamorous with a girl instead of monogamous you're admitting that she's ULTIMATELY not the right girl for you, but the relationship feels so good and you're learning from each other so much that you stay together until that right person comes along. If you're polyamorous you're having multiple relationships/girlfriends at the same time, they're all open, they all know about each other and they're all okay with it, and if they're not okay with it then you don't do it. There's nothing worse than being monogamous with someone for years only to find out she's not the right one for you, then you have to start all over again. Being polyamorous allows you to explore and meet tons of women to make sure you've found the right woman for you and the right guy for her. It teaches you how to maintain a relationship, learn a lot about what you're insecurities in relationships are and overcoming them. Ultimately when you feel like you've found the right girl for you, then you decide to be monogamous with them, then you can go deep as you want and think really long term with this girl.

No excuses. If it's truly something you're passionate about that shit won't matter. Look at this dude --> "I've broke over 60 bones in my body and what makes you keep going is when you get fucked up, you want to go back, that's what we signed up for, you don't live for getting hurt but it's a part of our game."

Welcome to personal development.

If you interpret what people say/do as negative/bad then that's what it will be. Ever consider your interpretations of what you're reading from others could be the cause of your lack of confidence in relationships? @CuteCornDogIn other words, are you aware of your own interpretations? Do you question your interpretations at all? or do you just see it as bad? Start questioning the "bad/negative" otherwise you're not gonna be able to take in the advice/constructive criticism (to help you grow and overcome this issue once and for all) and it's just gonna go through one ear and out the other.

Be careful reading too much into things. Focus on your life instead.

I hate to just post a video, but this is a complex issue and there's a lot of gold to be gotten from this, so watch it!

@MM1988 Yeah, on one hand all this shit can be funny, but the other hand there are guys out there who actually believe this shit and take it on as their reality. It's like those friends on facebook who just post shit as a joke, but deep, deep down they 100% believe the shit and it's incredibly sad.

Holy shizz, your right, also that entire movie is a perfect analogy but obviously the movie is more on the dark side hahaha.

Sorry, I couldn't help it.

Jeez, you sound like a kid on christmas eve lol

There's the rub! lol There are limitations here of course, you can't account for every contingency, but you can summon your highest wisdom and let your highest intuition take course and start developing the ability to trust in that (basically what you said about leaving the strategies to the higher self). What you call "synchronization events" I call balance. And that's the ultimate dynamic I think we're all going for. I want immaculate balance for everything I'm doing in my life, and being able to balance relationships and your entire life including other things is not easy work, but at the same time it's the best work I could ever be doing with my life. As I said before, it's not about a competitive dynamic at all/ comparing power, so we're definitely in an agreement there but at the same time that comparing power can reveal a lot of limitations within yourself that you can improve, so I feel it's necessary and it has it's place, it doesn't necessarily mean it's a "dark mindset", but it definitely can be in extreme cases and it could potentially turn into neurosis so I see what you mean

@Arkandeus I think you need to take "a man gets erect, and he fills up a woman so to say during intercourse" a lot more literally than ideologically lol. This. Also, in reality the male/female energies are a lot more dynamic than you could ever possibly articulate and it kind of kills it when you try lol. This is definitely one of those things you have to experience and can't really be summed up into a paragraph.

Unless his intent and seduction method is to show he's not interested because he's seeing signs from you that it's making you attracted But I get what you're saying. I'm a guy. Just the sight of a beautiful women especially if she's smiling I'm instantly attracted. But when it comes to a relationship and there's no seduction/touching then what do you really have? Do you really have the highest quality relationship possible? you have a good friendship at best with a splash of intimacy. And I don't know about you but that's not what I want for me and for my girl, I want to bring everything to the table at max capacity if I am capable.

I'm not ignoring my feelings, I'm just not being overtaken by them. There's nothing wrong with seeing how your suffering is helping you. And there's nothing wrong with maintaining a sense of confidence (what you're calling power), "sacrificing" your present self for future prospects is what I call hope and faith. You can't maintain a mental model of the world if you don't know the future, unless you KNOW that that future is unknowable. It might surprise you to know that your cultivation of faith is proportionate to your level of happiness. So yes it does ultimately make me feel good in the present moment knowing I have the confidence to face the unknown. My good feelings come from choosing to let people elicit them out of me and letting people affect me, and also by loving myself more not less if I don't feel like I'm getting the love I think I deserve. I'm not resisting suffering and uncomfortableness, I'm actually embracing it. There definitely is a possibly of being proud to make someone uncomfortable but you gotta understand I don't assume they're thinking like I do, that would be a mistake. For most people I find that discomfort does not equal happiness because I wouldn't get this "uncomfortable" vibe/reaction in the first place. Exactly. What do you show someone when you're comfortable being uncomfortable? Confidence. There's nothing dark about it depending on their own interpretations. I don't know about you but for me being caught off guard or not expecting something is not a good strategy in life. Yeah, you can let go of learning but it's not gonna stop the pattern from potentially reoccurring in the future. I am comfortable being uncomfortable that's what creates the faith and confidence in myself. My ultimate goal is not focused on struggle and discomfort. I just recognize that struggle and discomfort is something to be embraced fully. A "tough" guy is confident and secure in himself dealing with the biggest obstacles and challenges in life. a "weak" guy isn't, it's really that simple. It's not about some competitive dynamic of someone being tougher than someone else. It's about how grounded and imperturbable are you in the storms? I don't know about you but for me I want my girl to have that trust and confidence in me that I can handle her emotions and whatever life throws at me.

Yet, I still I don't think you've realized that the uncomfortable/hard life is actually where you want to ultimately rest your laurels. That is the process, that is the easy/comfortable life/happy life. That's the paradox/counter intuitive move here that I don't think you're understanding. Because if you understood that then being out of your "stream" wouldn't be a problem at all and you wouldn't hate dates, or feel odd talking with them, and nothing would feel tiring or hollow, it would just be your natural happy go lucky process without passing judgements. (not to say judgements are bad but you understand)

--> Attraction/Curiosity --> Attraction/Curiosity + Rapport --> Attraction/Curiosity + Rapport + Seduction Like I said. It's just a part. It's not the "one particular trait" that he has. and I referred to it as the "big" part because personally I feel without seduction you can't really create the passion, which is what I'm ultimately for.

And a big part of that chemistry is called seduction

Of course. Success does not equal happiness. I'm talking about thriving, not just feeling good or just being happy. When I say growth and learning I'm not talking about the success/chasing trap. I'm talking about the hero's journey, life long learning and enjoying the process instead of the destination and not suffering over anything at all. It sounds like you're having trouble connecting with a girl and instead of working on it you created this excuse/rationalization/limiting belief that say's "fuck it, why even try, I'm a doer, not a talker." and what is that gonna do but just perpetuate the situation and make it harder for you to connect with people. The whole point of you talking to anyone in the first place is to build that deep rapport connection (extremely interesting conversation that you and they could possibly grow from and learn from), but you have to go through light/wide rapport to get there. You don't even realize you could be dismissing some awesome girls just because you don't really know how to get deep with them. It's only "out of your stream" because you don't want to grow and learn from it and instead just want to be like "eh fuck it. I'm just gonna stick to what I know/ am good at." which is fine and I'm not blaming you, I'm just saying give these things a second thought before you just dismiss them. it's a lot easier/comfortable to stay in flow rather than stepping out of it back into the students shoes in order to grow yourself and learn something new.

It sounds like you really don't actually know what you want with your relationships. Because when you know exactly what you want EVERYTHING you do no matter how much time you waste becomes a learning/growth experience.

So, it's not so much that you see relationships and humans as worthless, it's more that people took advantage of you. You gotta open your heart back up to having real love for yourself and others again. Matt Khan can help show you how to love yourself, what actual love is and how to create it. Also Leo has a video about tapping into unconditional love. If you're feeling any resistance going in this direction, then that's EXACTLY what you need. I'll also add doing some shamanic breath work.

Well there's your problem. did you try to kiss her on the first or second date? if you didn't then you probably fell into the friendzone.

Don't be a hermit!

I'm sorry you feel you'd be an inconvenience in someone else's life and they'd be an inconvenience in yours.