Asayake

A year ago I worked on the audio for an indie film project directed by a friend of one of my childhood friends. We met through a party and he was very socially skilled irl and managed to convince me to work on his project for free(they had a very low budget and didn't make any money, the project was pretty much just for experience). At the end of the work period he became very intrusive and stressed me out big time. He was calling me 10-20 times and wanting to meet up irl all the time while I was trying to isolate myself to get into creative mode and do my job which was to do the audio for the film. In the middle of me pouring my soul out to do the job well he threatened to end our collaberation, after me having put down 100+ hours into the movie and saving the movie from being absolute trash, as the audio was poorly recorded and I had to do a lot of audio recovery and tiresome editing to save its face. I also made a lot of creative impact on the movie which practically pieced the movie together from being an absolute mess. A month after the project was finally over I swore to myself I will not work with this guy again but one day I had to meet with him again because I was going to meet up with my childhood friend and eat dinner and he brought the director guy along. The guy got me into a situation where I was 1 on 1 with him and he tried to pursue me to work for him again and make a soundtrack for his movie for free because he had music that was copyrighted in his movie and now he wanted to release his movie which he could not do and he did not have the budget to pay for copyrights to the music he had used. I refused because I recalled that I had sworn to myself not to work with him again, he had caused me a lot of anxiety, stress, and even made me self concious is a bad way and a bit paranoid. For example one time he and his friends turned up to my place at 3 Am in the middle of the night without messaging me or calling me or anything and they basically invited themselves over to my place. I was lying half asleep when my door bell was ringing and not only once, but literally spam ringing. I almost panicked because I thought it was the police or something because I was a heavy weed user at the time and it's not legal in my country. But no, it was the director guy and his friends wanting to hang out. Spontaneous things like this stressed me out when working with him and made me feel like I didn't have a safe space or privacy to be with myself. He constantly wanted to hangout and we hung out almost everyday of the week while I was doing the hard labour and carrying him on my back. Anyways, I refused to do the soundtrack for hte movie and he insulted me and called me lazy. I told him that's bullshit and reminded him I did a lot of work for him for free and I also have other obligations to meet in my life. We didn't talk since then, until this week. Now he has contacted me again. Calling me 10-15 times and typing "hahaha have u blocked me?". I got a bit paranoid because I don't feel comfortable with this guy. He uses others for his own gain and he has little to contribute with himself. In my mind he is downright abusive. I called him back once so far and told him I didn't block him. He wanted my feedback on a job application he had made for a game studio. I gave him some quick feedback and now he wants to meet for dinner. Frankly I really don't want to meet him for dinner but at the same time I'm stuck in an annoying position because he's friends with my childhood friend and his other friends and I like those people and want to remain in contact with them. Do you have any tips on how I can deal with this situation properly? It is giving me a lot of anxiety and stressing me out for no reason, while I'm otherwise in a good place in my life and loving almost every day.

I think I would describe the taste like old lab grown blueberries, 6/10 rating. But they look very cool, they have that kiwi flair going on on the inside.

Have you tried kiwi berries? 1. Mango 2. Cantaloupe melon 3. Cherries 4. Kiwi 5. Strawberries

Interesting, I didn't know that. Luckily I've never used it for long periods of time in a row or regularly at all. I wonder how Steve-O is doing considering that he did copious amounts of nitrous for extended periods of time.. hopefully he is alright. Thanks for the info!

Nitrous Oxide alone won't be very useful in my experience, but you could try it just a couple of times just to get a feeling for what it does by itself, You could get a very short ego death but to get it consistently you'd really have to push it dose-wise to go deep and that would potentially be very dangerous(asphyxiation). But when you combine it with any psychedelic, even weed, it potentiates it to an extreme degree. To this day nitrous oxide + weed is one of the deepest trip experiences I've had. If you want a taste of it you could do 1 balloon of nitrous oxide while being mildly high on weed or on a very low dose of LSD. If you want to go really deep you could do it on a normal LSD dose or do 1-2 balloons while being really high on weed. I think it's worth mentioning it can be very intense, but it comes on very fast, like getting punched in the face by Mike Tyson. As for breathing technique I've seen some different people using some different techniques. At first I did breathe in & out of balloon repeatedly like many people seem to do but after some research it seems like that isn't actually the safest way to do it. The safest I've found so far seems to be to breathe in and out a couple of deep breaths of air fiirst and then to inhale the entire balloon in one big breath and hold it in for about 30 seconds or so and then release and let breathing return to normal. If you want to go deeper you can breath in another balloon after having a couple of breaths of air inbetween. Breathing in and out of the balloon repeatedly appearently doesn't make you higher on nitrous oxide like a lot of people seem to think but rather it just gets you more oxygen deprivated. Too many balloons could be dangerous. And there seems to be risks associated with inhaling it directly from dispenser, like freezing the lips or throat/lungs. Another thing worth mentioning is it depletes vitamin B12 so taking vitamin B12 the following days could be a good idea.

Really appreciated this video, helpful stuff!

Carl-Richard vs Thisintegrated is the David vs Goliath of our time

Anyone else watched this movie? Recently watched it and found it to be a very beautiful movie. Very poetic and beautiful film that I'd highly recommend! Honorable mentions: Unbreakable (2000), also a really awesome movie

@Tyler Robinson @The Mystical Man @UpperMaster Thank you all for your responses it was just the perspectives I needed. For now I'm going to avoid meeting up with him and I'm going to cut any online conversations with him as short as I can. I'm going to ignore his calls. He has already wronged me too many times for me to tolerate him if he doesn't straight up apologize. I don't want to block him just yet, because I believe people can change. However, I recently found out he's been getting on the bad side of my childhood friend as of lately as well. So it seems the universe might be taking care of my childhood friend situation since it seems like they're not hanging out so much anymore. It seems it's not only me having trouble with this guy.

SUCH a good book!!! Awesome cover! Mine is not as cool, I'll have to get a cooler edition at some point lol

Laughed irl.

I will keep this in mind!

He seems controlling, and or paranoid, and or manipulative, and or a psychopath. Be careful.

I think this is very interesting. I have experienced how on multiple occasions in my own life my own development was accelerated shortly after experiencing an intense event such as having a conflict with my parents and crying, or during some death anxiety that surfaced during my recent problems with chest pain. Thinking back on traumatic events years later can be insightful but the fresher the experience is, the easier it seems to be to access insight that translates into life transformation, wether that is by making progress in the material realm or by changing the outlook on life itself, or both.

Why do you think he's an ISFP? I can sort of see it but I would like to hear your thought process behind it. I find him funny as hell for some reason, something about him is just funny to me, I'm not sure what.

Yes, Unbreakable really took me by surprise lol. An unexpectedly deep movie!! If there were spoiler tags on this forum I could write some more of my thoughts about it but there doesn't seem to be any..? Would highly recommend Cinema Paradiso, a heartfelt and personal movie about love that keeps popping up in my mind from time to time. Absolutely beautiful art. They are very different movies though, it's not similar whatsoever to Unbreakable. But they are both great in their own way.

I would say Lions Mane is very overrated. I tried it and at first I got hyped because it definitely has a sort of stimulating feel to it/made everything feel a bit sharper. I would almost compare it to not being sober. A sober mind is much more effective and if you need an occasional productivity boost coffee is better. Perhaps lions mane has its uses for people with brain damage or something like this. I think you should try it out if you're interested though, some people report it working well for them. And I can't deny it has a sort of unique feel to it that could be beneficial to experience at some point. But I didn't really find the way it made me feel helpful and it didn't really increase my productivity, mostly it just made me feel a bit weird/off. But eating more healthy, more greens, wholefoods, more protein, workout, yoga, fix ur sleep schedule are all going to make you feel much better and optimize your brain better than these quick fix mushrooms are.

Lmao this ludicrous thing make me laugh out loud.

Weed helped me get on the spiritual path and helped me connect with myself and life itself in many ways. I have consumed huge amounts of it and I'm still sane and healthy, It's not dangerous for all people. But it can make you less productive, especially when using it regularly. That's not necessarily a bad thing, but at some point a break is warranted to make any substantial life progress in the material dimension.

I think unhealthy ESTP can be really really annoying lol.

How about you add yoga or working out to your mix? If you want to get out of your head you could try getting into your body, those are great ways because they give you strong body sensations that are easy to focus on. with time this will give you increased body awarness and it will help quiet your mind. Yoga and working out has been more helpful for me as an overthinker than meditation has been. Although, meditation has been helpful as well, especially for getting me started with getting into my body. Since you already read a lot you could read Eckhart's The Power of Now. He gives practical advice in the book on different simple meditation techniques you can test out for yourself to help letting go of thought. He struggled with intrusive thoughts that made him suicidal in his early life so he has solid experience overcoming a severe degree of this problem.

What do you mean?

The beauty is in the eye of the observer, if you read fiction it can be a waste of time if you don't read between the lines and draw deeper conclusions from what you're reading and connect what you're reading with your own life experience, using it as an oppertunity to explore and reflect over your own life. Reading fiction can be like ingesting a seed for contemplation and introspection that will take you down paths of thought you might otherwise have overlooked. But of course, the fiction has to be good as well. Right now I'm reading 'Flowers for Algernon' which I would recommend. Every other page makes me reflect on something in my own life or invites me to reconsider things from a different perspective. But even a waste of time might not be too bad if it's a way for someone to wind down at the end of the day, Reading is going to come with health benefits even if no lessons are learned. It trains your ability to focus and is a good alternative to watching blue light screens before bedtime. But if you prefer reading non-fiction, that's great too.

I'm happy most of the time. Some days I have a lot of disorienting feelings which makes navigating everyday life more challenging. But I've learned to better accept those days and just go with the flow. After those more challenging days I usually have very good productive days where I feel energized and ready to take on the world. Although I do have some particularly tough days where I would prefer to not do anything at all. These days can be caused by both external factors such as health trouble or internal feelings or lack of energy after spending too much time with other people. If I spend most of my time alone with sprinkles of meeting other people here and there I am at peace, even if I'm working through tough feelings. However, when I'm forced to deal with a lot of people at the same time that I'm going through challenging feelings I often have some sort of backlash when I finally get to be with myself again, where I'm forced to work through my feelings for a couple of days to feel better. Overall I'm content and happy with life and understand that life will always pose challenges or else happiness loses its body and becomes hollow.

I have not properly tripped sleep deprived like that but I've microdosed LSD while sleep deprived and I would not really recommend it. The sleep deprivation will make you have a harder time focusing and will likely result in a more intense and confusing experience. Probability of negative side effects will probably increase, or atleast many of the positive effects might be diminished. However I'm not sure how malt feels. LSD would make you feel perfectly awake and aware at first but you would be completely done with it on the comedown, most likely. It might sound like a fun idea now that you feel zen but that feeling isn't guaranteed to last forever. At some point you will be exhausted and want to sleep, I'm guessing. If you're already feeling zen, maybe just do nothing and see where that takes you? There'll be better opportunities to trip.