Asayake

Runescape. It was many years now since I last played it but that game was freaking beautiful. And I'm not talking about Runescape 3 or Oldschool Runescape, but Runescape 3 before they made it into Runescape 3(they changed combat system, trading system, a lot of what made the game what it was). That game taught me a lot about life(street smarts, patience, English skills and more). It has a nostalgic charm to it for me that reminds me of the good times of my childhood. Beautiful music and surprisingly good/witty lore in the quests, almost meditative at times when you would spend hours just clicking on trees for no real reason. My mom used to say the game will still be there once I've finished my homework. I get why she said that but... she lied

3 of my personal favorites but... @puporing The Rachmaninov piano concerto no.2 you posted is maybe my favorite classical piece of all time. The first time I heard that.. good god. it's just TOO good!! It's that or Schubert Sonata D. 894 for me

I was mentally addicted to weed, smoked or vaped large quantities of it daily for months without being able to bring myself to quit and then suddenly quit it overnight without any physical symptoms, only drug cravings(mental, that I could let go of within a day and then I was sober). How is that possible? I have also quit weed after being addicted years back and gone through a very rough withdrawal filled with anxiety, insomnia and nausea that I believe in hindsight was actually just caused by the mental side effects(drug craving thoughts and thoughts about how life is pale without weed, thoughts about how I am addicted and should give up quitting and how quitting sucks and is hard that I believed in, which was feeding the negative emotions and causing my body to react physically and emotionally in a negative way). The difference was that I let go of thoughts the time where I didn't get any withdrawal(dysphoria, nausea, anxiety, insomnia or anything like this) after quitting. It's fully possible that I'm not using the clinically correct terminology here, I'm not formally educated in the matter. The reason I thought of it as mental addiction/physical addiction is because in my mind mental addiction causes mental side effects after quitting(thoughts that try to pull you back to using the drug). And physical addiction causes physical side effects that is unrelated to the mental symptoms of quitting(like migraines, physical pain, diarrhea). Letting go of thoughts might make opiate pains less horrible but they will still be there because the body is physically adapted to the opiates in a way which makes physical symptoms from quitting inevitable. This is not the case with weed, from my experience, the physical symptoms were not there for me when I handled the mental side of it differently. Drinking water is an addiction with both a physical and mental component(or in other words, both an addiction and a dependence). Quitting will cause thoughts like "if I don't drink soon I will die". Believing those thoughts will cause negative physical reaction in the body and feed negative emotions. But even when letting those thoughts go your body will still die and decay away without water. Hence drinking water is physically addictive(the body is dependent?) on water. I think we actually probably agree on a lot of this and it's just largely a confusion of terminology.

Weed is not physically addicting, the addiction is in your mind clinging to weed to try to escape what is. Thoughts like "Today would suck hard/be pointless without some weed" appear and acting on those thoughts even though they're not true makes you keep using weed regularly. They make you addicted to weed even though it's not addictive by itself. It's not like with cigarettes or opiates where you actually have a physical withdrawal that you can't deny even if you let go of thoughts. A weed withdrawal is just mental, it can give you physical symptoms by having negative thoughts about how horrible not smoking would be if you believe those thoughts, because those thoughts will feed your negative feelings with energy if you stay stuck in them. But if you can manage to let go of thoughts the withdrawal is non existent. What happens is people who become addicted to weed and stop smoking is that any negative feeling they have will be confirmed to be caused by quitting weed by their own thoughts and they will get stuck in a loop of feeding that negative feeling with their thoughts, thinking about how horrible it is to quit weed instead of processing their emotions, which in turn can cause symptoms like nausea, stored up anxiety, being utterly exhausted etc. At least this is how I understand it from my own experience. That being said people can still be addicted to weed, it's just that the addiction is mental and there are so many things that can be mentally addicting. So I guess it depends on what one means by "non-addictive". It can certainly be psychologically addictive, that's for sure. But any psychological addiction can be let go of by connecting to the Now.

Good job, it seems to me you've already evolved by becoming aware of things you want to improve on in your life. Just remember to also not be too hard on yourself because you couldn't have done things differently than you did in the past. But Now you can do things differently moving forward. Oh and also don't be too hard on yourself for being too hard on yourself .. Yoga can help with the numbness by energizing you and helping you to stop reaching for external stimuli to make some excitement happen, it helps you reconnect to your body and heal. Other than that I would say keep doing what you're doing, keep reflecting on what's a good way forward for you and use this forum for some guidance. Just don't wait too long before you take action. That's ultimately how to create movement in the right direction, at the end of the day thinking too much gets us nowhere.

The sensation of clothes on the body for example, is a sign of increased body awareness as others have stated here. It is not something negative but it's the fact that the persons mind is judging it to be bad because of not being used to that feeling that it becomes a problem. With time such things, like tingling sensation in third eye chakra, increased awareness of heart beating, sensations of clothes sticking to skin etc. turns into places you can go within yourself for peace and clarity.

What does your diet look like, are you eating enough after training? Also what does your workouts look like, are you 1 rep maxing deadlifts or doing higher rep movements with lower weight? How many body parts do you train in a session and how many sessions do you do per week? What kind of movements are you doing? Try a few different kinds of Yoga and see what works the best for you. There's a lot of good content on YouTube(Yoga with Adrienne has a 30 day Yoga challenge I liked if you want to try that at some point). I like Hatha Yoga and Yin Yoga. Hatha Yoga early in the day gets the energy flowing in my body. Yin Yoga makes me calm and connected to my body and helps me wind down. I'm sure Kriya Yoga is also a good practice, all I have tried from that is Shambhavi Mudra so I can not speak a lot about it but from what I have tried it was good, it's something I'm going to explore more myself in the future.

Do you workout or do yoga? These will make you more energized and break through the sluggish phase that can be experienced sometimes after masturbation. Also they will improve your self discipline so you don't have to masturbate everytime you feel like it. But never masturbating is probably not the best either imo, doing it sometimes can be a good thing. Try doing it without porn and focusing on the feelings in your body to make it a moment of bonding with yourself. Also work on your diet to make sure you get enough nutrients, it will make you recover faster not only from masturbation but from training as well.

Last night I did 105 ug of LSD. It ended up being the best trip I've ever had. I spent my trip listening to music, meditating, and peeing(an awful lot ). Here's a summary of what I learned: My comeup was not the smoothest. I did not have any nervous thoughts or anything of that nature, my feelings were peaceful as well. But my body reacted way stronger than on any comeup I ever had before. My heart was beating out of my chest, my palms were sweating like crazy, I could feel the inside of my throat very vividly and it felt like it was very narrow and uncomfortable, claustrophobic. I felt an oncoming intensity and sense of doom on par with going up a very tall rollercoaster that I was soon to regret going on("you're in for a ride kid"). I just lied down in my bed and was aware of my body's reaction. My heart was beating very fast for a while and I was uncomfortably aware of it. I just reminded myself that I don't have to be afraid of the sensation of my heart beating out of my chest, but to get to know it and be curious, to let it express itself to me. I was being present with my body like a mother is present with her distressed child. Then it suddenly hit me. I realized the love I have for myself. When it seemed like everything was about to go to shit I kept my cool anyways and did what I thought was the best thing to do. Because I have a deep love for myself. And that deep love for myself is what defines me, it is who I am in the purest sense. I was never more real than I was in that moment, yet that was the way I had been all along, this situation just made it clear enough for me to see that it is this way. My body was soon soothed by my loving presence and realizations were had: - I became conscious of infinity, infinite love for what is. Every moment presented me with a new form of infinity that I was constantly falling in love with. - You can not grasp it intellectually because what it is transcends the intellectual. - It is pure love, I can not come up with better words to describe what it is. - LSD is like a cold shower of love. So much love that you're afraid to let yourself feel it. So much love that it hurts, so intense that it can give you instant ego death when you let it take you, when you let yourself feel it for what it is. At one point I felt a serious intensity arising. I put my head onto my hands to let myself relax into it and let it take me. I connected to my breath and suddenly, out of nowhere I had an instant ego death. Visuals were going absolutely crazy as I was one. It was the most powerful ego death I've had since doing big amounts of Weed & Nitrous Oxide a few years ago. But during that ego death I was completely dissociated and "gone", it was just like I became a 2D object/computer program and then was reborn into a human being when I "came back to it". This time I was fully aware of what was going on(I even had the thought, "wow, full on ego death, that easy huh ?"), but I was still completely merged into one. It was insanely intense and powerful. When I came back I was a bit shocked because of the sheer intensity and how it hit me out of nowhere. I was a bit shaken but it felt like a weight had been lifted of my shoulders, like I had let go of a lot of fear. I had the similar feeling of being reborn when coming back that I had on the weed/nitrous combo, except this time I was not surprised that I was back. - Everything you go through in life is because you love the beauty of it all for an eternity. The best way to express it is through love for what is, being with what is. - Even philosophy is not what you think it is. - Music shows us the infinite. Music(and life itself) is a trip through infinity. A good music album(or a song) is like a gourmet slice of infinity, infinity organized in a beautiful way. The music I listened to during the trip sounded just like normal music. It's just that I could hear it more accurately, for what it truly was, and being with it in every moment that transformed it into something more beautiful than it would have been in my usual sober state of mind. Just like being with my uncomfortable sensations at the beginning of the trip transformed the negative sensations into a wonderful trip. Because being with what is is what love is. Turning water into wine. Show a rabid dog love and it will transform into a loving pet. Being with the meaninglessness of music is what creates the meaningfulness of music. - At one point I was looking at a stopwatch timer on my browser that I used to check how much time had passed in the trip occasionally. The browser had bugged so it was frozen at 2 hours or so. I thought to myself, "holy fuck, time has stopped!" and had a strong feeling of time standing still. Then after looking at the frozen timer for a while I realized it could be bugged so I tried refreshing the page and the timer started working again. Then I realized that time is actually standing still all the time and laughed at how stupid and profound what had just happened was. Later on I was thinking about this more and realized that even thinking about how much time had passed was pointless, since time is so warped on LSD that keeping track of it doesn't really matter anyways. WOW. What an experience, will definitely do LSD again at some point in the future. LSD is officially my favorite psychedelic .

I get that. He did try to create an attachment in you to him so that he could rely on you for sex to fulfill himself. It's not a very nice game he is playing so you should definitely cut ties with him and try to let go of thoughts of him and move on. That's just my opinion of course, you do as you wish. With that being said, to answer your thread title he was definitely attracted to you or otherwise he wouldn't have approached you at all. It's just for him attraction is all about sex because he is emotionally underdeveloped right now and will be until he himself decides to grow as a person. And he's most likely turning to the other girl for sex as well, using the same excuse with her when he finds yet another girl. For him sex and love is drug and he will suffer for it in the end and be forced to change his ways. Let go of thoughts, connect to your breath & inner body. There's no reason to spend your precious time alive on thinking too much about him. There are good things here & now for you to be with. With time you'll find a better guy. There's plenty of fish in the sea

This guy sounds like a fuckboy...

I can't tell if you're trolling or not. Calling others whom you know nothing about "amateurs in this work", implying that you know more than them, which you probably don't. And even if you did, do you think your approach will make others inclined to listen to what you have to say? It doesn't seem to be working too well judging from the response you got..

Very cool.

You probably don't need to worry. There's already so much air pollution and other damaging chemicals etc. around that a little smoke for a couple of minutes isn't going to cause any significant harm(just don't make it a daily thing ), unless it kills you by asphyxiation on the spot. Since you didn't feel a lack of oxygen or anything weird the smoke was probably more diluted with air than it looked. Fear of damaging your brain sounds quite normal to me, I've had similar fear myself but with psychedelics. About one year ago after tripping on LSD and meditating I had persistent fractal visuals that occasionally appeared for a few months before they finally resided. I think in the end, what caused more damage to my brain was probably my mind freaking out so much about whether or not I had damaged my brain permanently or if I was going to have a psychosis and never be the same again one day. That fear stuck with me for quite some time and for a while I actually believed I had damaged my brain. My mind would use the appearance of negative feelings to confirm that I had in fact damaged my brain. If I had a bit of anxiety for no apparent reason? Well, must have been that I fucked my brain up. Was stumbling over words when I was talking with my friend? Fuck.. I never should have tripped that one time.. I'm so stupid, how could I do this fatal mistake and ruin my mind. But when I finally said to myself whatever.. If my brain is broke it is broke. There is nothing I can do about it, shit happens. I stopped focusing my mind on thinking about what could be wrong, trying to find a problem where there really wasn't a big problem at all. Some time passed where I didn't think much about it at all. Occasionally the fractals kept reappearing but less and less often. Now it's been months since they last appeared and I feel completely normal and am not afraid of brain damage anymore. My guess is your mind is scaring you over nothing and making it seem like there is danger when there really isn't, just like my mind did.

For me personally I think it helped shine a light on what my problems were and showed me a way forward. It made me realize that if I didn't take certain action my life would be degenerating at an increasingly rapid rate. That realization in itself probably cause extra anxiety for me. But that turned out to be good in the end because I couldn't ignore my problems anymore but was forced to try to deal with them.

Don't worry. There's many reasons for why he didn't respond. Maybe he doesn't know what to say. Maybe he don't like speaking about such things because it reminds him of his own demons. There's hundreds of reasons why he doesn't respond, our mind just seem to naturally come to the worst conclusion sometimes. Probability is high he sympathizes with you but is insecure/overthinking how to respond. Let it be and if he doesn't respond for a week or so you could try to bring up some lighter topic and just move on with the conversation in some other direction.

The difference being that indoor plumbing is not viewed upon by most people as a groundbreaking fantastic achievement on par with travelling to Mars. The reason Tesla is worth so much is that Elon is using the same strategies that the US and Russia used to gain power during the cold war. Big promises of solving humanities problems by sending expensive tech to space. Giving people false hope in a way that I doubt the invention of indoor plumbing ever did. But with that said I get your point, material progress is not necessarily bad.

As I heard Mike Tyson say in some interview a couple of weeks ago: "Love hurts". That's some powerful insight!

I think "Talent is overrated" is a solid book. I think I would classify it as a psychology book because it shows how something we believe that is actually not true can handicap our potential in life(and does so för most people). And it offers a way forward, how to become really good at something.

Didn't he say something like this in the recent video about ketamine? He was talking about his upcoming interview with Curt and how Curt is an example of a beautiful mind in a sense. Before that he spoke about just that, how the mind actually can be a beautiful tool.

Aha! So my DDOS attack IS working Jk of course lol

I don't even like the fact that restrictions are being imposed on people with certain opinions. I don't have to agree with other people's opinions but how do I know they're the biased ones and I'm not? The label is even more stupid. Why are left wing opinions considered better than right wing opinions on the forums? They're both flawed stances and if you think otherwise look at how much destruction they both caused throughout history. And even if right wing or pro Russia opinions objectively were worse(or why else was this user made 'apolitical'?) someone needs to have the 'worse' opinion in every discussion or everyone just has the same opinion and then you might as well just delete the political subforum because there's no discussion to be had. If the user did actual misconduct a ban is warranted but it doesn't seem to me this is the case? I might be mistaken.

The Red Shoes (1948) is an amazing movie. Beautiful, thought provoking, ahead of its time. Wether you like ballet or not it's a worthwhile watch. Tampopo (1985) is hilarious, unexpected, innovative, cool, unique. The Grand Budapest Hotel (2014) is hilarious, spectacular, stylish, beautiful, colourful.

How is it that Tristan is God when Tristan is a finite concept and God is infinite? Isn't it that I for example mistake myself to be Nils(which is a finite concept, a human identity, my name, a word) when in fact I am that which the word I is pointing to(God, which is infinite), of which Nils(this human identity, concept, etc.) is just a part. But saying Nils is God makes me a bit confused because it's like saying Nils right hand is Nils? The hand is a part of Nils but saying a hand is Nils doesn't really capture what Nils really is? I'm really trying to understand this. Edit: typo

Hmm. Perhaps you weren't really that into the girl sexually, could that be the problem, that it feels a bit forced & shallow because you don't really feel like touching her yet(even though you know sex would be nice), like a deep connection really isn't there? That you just need to find someone you're really into to make touching etc. more enjoyable, exciting and something you want to do for its own sake. Sleeping with a lot of random girls you just barely got to know isn't everyone's cup of tea(different people like different things), it sounds like you're actually more interested in connecting with a girl and getting to know her on a deeper level and not just having sex with a girl you barely just met, am I wrong in my assumption here? Maybe you should try to find yourself someone you can get to know on a deeper level first, a girlfriend? There is no need to escalate things early on just to make sure you score. Atleast when it comes to myself, I am not really that attracted unless there is a deep connection, sexual attraction is not only looks as I'm sure you're aware of. And when there is a deep connection things will more naturally lead to touching etc. and it will feel more meaningful. You don't have to touch her or try to kiss her on the first date. if it feels forced/shallow it's probably going to be forced/shallow, so trust your gut. Because you will not only be doing it to to get her love/sex, but you will do it because she has grown to be someone you care about and want to spend your time with, and you will want to caress her and make her feel good too because you care for her. Then you will not only be touching her for your own sake. I don't buy that you need to sleep with 100s of girls to find the best girl to become your girlfriend. The best girlfriend is the girl you build on a relationship with for a long time and that shares some interest/interests with you. If one spends all his time hooking up with random girls a lot of time is wasted that could be spent really getting to know someone. Which would make the sex a lot more meaningful as well. Quantity does not equal quality.